The Diary of Juliet Thompson
with a preface by Marzieh Gail



At 48 West Tenth
by Marzieh Gail

Whether or not General Tom Thumb (Barnum's midget, and at the start
of his career twenty-five inches long, weighing in at fifteen
pounds) ever owned the Greenwich Village brownstone where Juliet
and Daisy (Marguerite Pumpelly Smyth) lived so many years, we do
not know. At the time when we knew the place, Daisy was renting it
from Romeyne Benjamin, brother of Dorothy Benjamin who married
Enrico Caruso.

Like its fellows in the row, it was narrow and high, with black
railings to either side of the front steps, other steps leading
down to a long basement room, and a strip of garden in back.
Inside, up from the front hall, narrow stairs hugged the wall on
your right.

The old house, painted light blue when we last saw it, long after
the inmates loved by us were gone, might well have been the wealthy
midget's, as Juliet was inclined to believe: it was just such a
place.

When Daisy asked 'Abdu'l-Baha how to live, He said, "Be kind to
everyone," and Daisy was. The house was a haven for a motley crowd.
Here, Daisy's brother Raphael told me he had once, during the
Depression, left his bed briefly in the night, and returned to find
a sailor in it, complete with live parrot. Here, at one given time,
in an upstairs room Dimitri Marianoff, Einstein's former
son-in-law, who had become a Baha'i, was writing a book on Tahirih,
while Juliet was revising her I, Mary Magdalene on a lower floor
and I, at ground level, refugeeing from the family apartment
uptown, was finishing Persia and the Victorians. Here Daisy, like
Juliet a fine artist, sat among their many guests at the firesides.
Usually inaccessibly vague, Daisy would from time to time utter a
great truth. Once when her cat unsheathed its claws and raked
delicate upholstery, Daisy spoke: "Cats are more fun than
furniture," she said.

'Abdu'l-Baha had been all over the house. His living presence had
blessed it all. In a dark corner of Juliet's whispering old studio
stood a fragile armchair of black oak--it would later be willed by
her to Vincent Pleasant--surprisingly small, with a cord across it,
none ever to sit in it again, the chair of 'Abdu'l-Baha. He loved
her studio room. He said it was eclectic, part oriental, part
occidental, and that He would like to build a similar one.

Here, Juliet had read in manuscript the books of her friend and
neighbour Kahlil Gibran. Here she had struggled with her love for
Percy Grant. Here, by my time, we talked a little about the land
in Chiriqui which (such is my memory of it) Lincoln had helped her
father, Ambrose White Thompson, his close friend, to acquire. A
rich tract of land in northern Panama it was, and Juliet believed
that somewhere in Colombia, which then owned the area, a government
building had burned down, and all the relevant documents about the
property had gone up in flames.

After her father's death, Juliet and her mother were poor. Juliet
could, of course, have married money. Many men sought, as they used
to say, her hand. Two prominent Baha'is who proposed to her were
John Bosch and Roy Wilhelm. Come to that, Mason, Admiral Remey's
son, whom 'Abdu'l-Baha wished her to marry, was not a poor man.
Juliet told me that in those days Mason had grown a red beard, and
as they sat together he would talk of the children they would have,
and Juliet would visualize, floating in the air about her, the
Remey babies, each with a small red beard.

Mostly, we discussed the progress or lack thereof of our Baha'i
community in New York and the nation at large, and one day we
decided that what our Faith most needed in America was the
qualities of George Townshend. Immediately, we determined to cable
the Guardian and ask him to send us George Townshend--a pre-eminent
Baha'i who was the former Canon of St. Patrick's cathedral in
Dublin and Archdeacon of Clonfert--to travel nation-wide and teach.
Far from ignoring our doubtless brash suggestion, the Guardian at
once replied, with a radiogram received 19 February 1948:

JULIET MARZIA 48 WEST 10TH STREET NEW YORK
REGRET TOWNSHEND'S EFFORTS DUBLIN VITALLY NEEDED
SIX YEAR PLAN LOVE SHOGHI.

'Abdu'l-Baha teaches that we must never "belittle the thought of
another" (Baha'i Administration, p. 22), and although Shoghi
Effendi was carrying the whole Baha'i world on his back, he did not
belittle ours, and he took the time to answer.

Once, when the powers that be were making life difficult for me in
another city, Juliet wrote them a letter in my favour. To this,
there was no reply. What status did Juliet have? She was only one,
the Master said, that future queens would envy, only one who would
be remembered long after the rest of us were gone and forgotten.

She was always a rebel. She did not hesitate to speak well of the
Germans during World War I, and to exhibit the Kaiser's picture on
her living room table. Something like setting up a statue of Herod
in a cathedral, at the time. In later years, she decided to rewrite
I, Mary Magdalen and make Judas a certain leading individual who
afterward lived on to receive great honours in our Faith.

Juliet was a Celt, from a long line of early bards, and she was kin
to Edward Fitzgerald, of the Rubaiyat. Her Irishness did not,
apparently, extend to that country's religion. She told me that
when her father was dying, he was by chance in the hands of the
nuns, and they moved about, seeing to it that Extreme Unction (as
it was then called) was duly administered, while her non-Catholic
mother wrung her hands. Reassuring, the moribund raised his head
and said: "Never mind, Celeste, it doesn't amount to a damn."

Rebels are valuable, but they are not always right. Once, contrary
to everyone's advice, Juliet's strong feelings about an individual
led her and Daisy astray. She made us all come to the man's talks,
or rather talk, which was always about love. We got so we hated
love. "No wonder he advocates love," was Harold Gail's comment,
"look what it's done for him." It had certainly given him Juliet
and Daisy, and only later on did they see the light--the light
being that his main interest seemed to be Daisy's bank account.

As the Guardian once commented, our World Order is founded on
justice, not love. Our governing institutions are Houses of
justice, not love.

The man did bring many to hear about love at Juliet's, which used
to remind me of Romeyne Benjamin's gloomy prophecy, that the
ceilings would fall in.

It was the unconventional, rebel quality in Juliet--this, plus her
sympathy and true love--that attracted so many to her, particularly
the young. All ages, sexes, skin colours, and degrees of wealth and
servitude, used to foregather at 48 West Tenth. Her name was,
incidentally, in the New York Social Register, along with her
brother's--"but I am only there as a junior," she laughed.

This unconventional quality of hers, frightening to any
establishment, appealed to the Guardian, as it had to the Master
before him. We remember writing to the Guardian once, about a town
where the activity was barely detectable, and he replied that the
situation was due to "the lethargy and conservatism of certain
elements in the community."

'Abdu'l-Baha praised Juliet repeatedly for her absolute
truthfulness. On her second pilgrimage, when the Guardian asked
her, "Do you like the (Wilmette) Temple?" She answered: "No, it
looks like a wedding cake." She added, relaying the conversation
to me: "We used to call it 'Mrs True's church.'" (Mrs Corinne True,
later a Hand of the Faith, was known as "the Mother of the
Temple.") She said Mason Remey withdrew his design, in favour of
Louis Bourgeois', although each received the same number of votes.

Needless to add, the ethereal, lacy, floating House of Worship at
Wilmette does not look like a wedding cake, but Juliet had an
opinion and she voiced it. "Let us remember," the Text says, "that
at the very root of the Cause lies the principle of the undoubted
right of the individual to self-expression, his freedom to declare
his conscience and set forth his views." (Baha'i Administration,
p. 54).

We read in her diary of the Master's telling Juliet "a thing so
wonderful" that she could not repeat it. In after years she
confided to Baha'i pioneer Bill Smits what that thing was. "You are
nearer to me than anyone here," 'Abdu'l-Baha had said, "because you
have told me the truth." Asked what He meant by " here," she said,
"Oh, New York, the United States--I don't know."

This diary we have here is not the original, longhand one. She
destroyed that. She was essentially a private person and all those
secrets have blown away. This diary is the core of the original:
she kept whatever she wanted posterity to have, sat up in bed with
the portable on her knees and typed it herself. I was one of
(necessarily) few to receive a carbon, and mine has some of her own
hand-written notes in the margin. Some years afterward I had the
carbon professionally typed for the National Spiritual Assembly,
but years later it could not be discovered in their files. Also,
Philip Sprague mimeographed parts of it, but where that material
is, we do not know.

Still more years later, when Harold and I were back from Europe and
living in New Hampshire, I became aware that with so few copies in
the world it might be lost forever, and consulting with fellow
Baha'is we had xeroxes made, so it would stay safe. Meanwhile
someone--was it Daisy?--had brought out a handsome booklet, printed
by the Roycrofters, East Aurora, New York, and titled
'Abdu'l-Baha's First Days in America, From the Diary of Juliet
Thompson. It bears no date or copyright, is forty pages long and
contains only excerpts: a teaser, as it were.

The truth seems to be that during her lifetime the Baha'is in
charge of publishing did not cotton to the dairy. "Too personal,"
they said. They probably meant that there was too much love in it.
We understand this, but we note that the mass of the believers were
always eager for it. Here was a woman blessed as perhaps no other
occidental Baha'i was blessed. Not only was she received by
'Abdu'l-Baha in the Holy Land, in Switzerland and the eastern
United States, but she had an artist's eye and a writer's pen, and
thus, better perhaps than any, she was able to evoke those so often
irretrievable days and hours.

'Abdu'l-Baha prophesied of her that: "In the time to come, queens
will wish they had been the maid of Juliet." Certainly she received
priceless opportunities, and proved adequate to her good fortune.

Love is not blind, it is "quick-eyed," George Herbert said.
'Abdu'l-Baha likened Juliet to Mary Magdalene because she loved,
and saw, so much. She had that same storied love that Mary
had--that love which after all is the only thing that holds the
Baha'is together, or for that matter holds the Lord to His
creatures, or keeps the stars in their courses.

She says here that one early morning (on that breathless, ecstatic,
tear-drenched pilgrimage) she gave up her will, made over her
desires and her life to the Will of God, and saw how, when we are
able to do that, "the design takes perfect shape." Then peace
comes, she says, and "beauty undreamed of blossoms upon our days."

Again she tells how the Master once gathered the American pilgrims
together--they being symbols of all--and said He hoped that a great
and ever-growing love would be established among them. He knew that
their one main desire was to live in His presence, and He told them
how this could be done.

"The more," He said, "you love one another, the nearer you get to
me. I go away from this world, but Love stays always."

Juliet's death notice in the New York Times says that she was born
in New York, but the jacket to her book, I, Mary Magdalene,
undoubtedly more to be trusted, has her a Virginian by birth, and
brought up in Washington, D.C.

She was a cult figure. People became possessive about her, regarded
her as theirs and only grudgingly doled her out. This was
particularly true of Helen James, who came from the Caribbean area
and was a long-time companion. I can remember Helen angrily barring
the door to me one day, when Juliet was sick. It did not bother me
too much--I knew from mythology that dragons guard treasures. Then
there was another time when I had prevailed on a man to come over
to the Village all the way from Brooklyn, and record Juliet's voice
as she read from her diary. (On wire, it was. The business was new
then.) And Helen tried, in the midst of it, to break in from the
other room and let in even more noise, besides what was already
being reproduced from the traffic on West Tenth.

You can say for Helen that she was a true friend to Juliet, and
faithful. One mid-day, years after all this, as Juliet lay in her
bed, it seems that she looked up at Helen and asked, "Do you want
to come with me, and be with 'Abdu'l-Baha?"

"No," Helen told her, "I am not ready yet."

And then, as she watched, she saw Juliet die. It was 4 December
1956. They had moved by then, the Times said, to 129 East Tenth.
I was glad that she did not die at number 48.

The Guardian's cable, received by Daisy Smyth on December 7, said
"DEEPLY GRIEVED" and "HER REWARD ASSURED." To the National
Spiritual Assembly he cabled, "DEPLORE LOSS," and he directed that
a memorial gathering be held for her in the House of Worship. In
this cable among other praises he referred to her "IMPERISHABLE
MEMORY," said that she was "FIRED WITH ... CONSUMING DEVOTION" to
the Centre of Baha'u'llah's Covenant, and called her "MUCH LOVED,
GREATLY ADMIRED ... OUT-STANDING EXEMPLARY HANDMAID [OF]
'ABDU'L-BAHa."

__________

48 West Tenth Street was a house dedicated to 'Abdu'l-Baha. Often
when you were let in the front door, you heard His voice--the
recorded, spontaneous chant made in 1912--loudly reverberating
through the rooms.

One day Juliet took Robert Gulick and me up the street to the
corner of Fifth Avenue, and we entered the beautiful Church of the
Ascension that had once been Percy Grant's pride before his ruin,
and she showed us exactly where 'Abdu'l-Baha stood, delivering His
first American public address on 14 April 1912.

He came out of the vestry on the right, just as the choir burst
into "Jesus lives." He sat in the Bishop's chair--which broke the
nineteenth canon of the Church, for the unbaptized may not go
behind the chancel rail. The red plush chair with its high back was
still there, just as it had been that other day, although no flame
burned on the altar then. When He spoke as you looked past the low
steps to the altar, He was on the right, and He stood on the fifth
flagstone.

'Abdu'l-Baha had told Juliet she must either break with Percy Grant
or marry him. She had broken with him. Percy had arranged this
meeting for the Master as a peace offering to Juliet. From this
very pulpit, to win Juliet away from her Faith, he had often
inveighed against the decadent East, had even denounced "the Baha'i
sect," but today he had filled the church with lilies and arranged
for One from the East, and Head of the Baha'is, to speak.

Juliet said that she used, in her story of Mary Magdalene (whom,
as 'Abdu'l-Baha remarked in the diary, she even physically
resembled) many things she learned from the Master himself. This
book has inclined many a heart toward our Faith, and Stanwood Cobb
considered it "one of the most graphic and lofty delineations of
Christ ever made in literature."

She illustrated her story with portraits, three of them: one
haloed, of the Master's face; Mary wears Juliet's face, they being
look-alikes; and the handsome lover, Novatus, wears the face of
Percy Grant. She was a serious artist, frequently exhibited, and
a member of the National Arts Club. She had studied at the Corcoran
Art School, then at Julien's in Paris, and with Kenneth Hayes
Miller in New York.

During the Coolidge era, Juliet's beauty and social background,
along with her artistic gifts, carried her into the White House.
(It is interesting to note how many Baha'is have been received at
the White House, all the way from 'Ali Quli Khan and Florence, and
Laura Barney, in the early days to moderns like Robert Hayden and
Dizzie Gillespie). Juliet was there to make a portrait of Mrs
Coolidge, incidentally one of the most popular of First Ladies.

"The President came in to watch," said Juliet, "chewing on an
apple, and I told Mrs Coolidge I could not put up with that."

The portrait she did of 'Abdu'l-Baha, described here in the diary,
no longer exists, except in a photograph.

Time-damaged, it had to be restored, and Juliet felt the original
was gone forever. The Kinneys maintained that He did like it
because He said it made Him look old. 'Abdu'l-Baha greatly
encouraged her art, and told her it was the same as worship, but
toward the end she no longer cared to go on with it, nor even cared
for her once-loved New York as it had become, and all she wanted
to do was teach the Faith.

Sometimes Juliet and Marjorie would recline at the top of Juliet's
large bed, while Daisy and I would sit on chairs at the foot. The
sooty warm spring air would blow in from the little back garden,
down where Rebecca--a statue picked up by Romeyn Benjamin--stood
scanning the horizon, endlessly waiting on her pedestal, left hand
to brow. It was one such time when the conversation centred on
Percy Grant, that dramatic preacher who, in our view, certainly
merits a biographer, not only for his small role in our Faith but
because he represents so much of New York history at the century's
turn.

"Poor Julie. How long did you love him?" I asked.

"Seventeen years, darn it." (In those days it went without saying
that the love was Platonic.)

And that is how, reinforced by Marjorie, Juliet told me how things
turned out for Percy Grant. Significantly, his end is relegated in
the dairy to a footnote. The story of it goes like this:

Grant was--as 'Abdu'l-Baha remarked to 'Ali Quli Khan, comparing
the popular society clergyman to his disadvantage with the fine
Unitarian minister, Howard Ives--a womanizer. (Here, 'Abdu'l-Baha
used a graphic Persian word.) His remark was prompted by the fact
that, as they were leaving the church by a side door, they
accidentally encountered the rector with a woman in his embrace.
Later the Master, father to daughter, even more graphically but in
other words, warned Juliet to the same effect. And in the long run,
it is of note that finally a woman toppled Grant down.

She was a Cuban--descended beauty of great wealth, whose luxurious
car would be seen outside Grant's rectory by day and night. She had
a dead-white face with bright, red-painted lips, and was a given
to wearing evening gowns which did not hide the fact one breast had
been completely removed, while the other remained without flaw. No
intellectual, she was what Marjorie called "eruditized" by her
association with famous artists and scholars.

Wherever Percy Grant went, she went, gazing up at him as he towered
over her, and calling him "Little Rector." Without his knowledge,
she spent $60,000 redoing his house. When she had their engagement
announced in the Paris Herald, his only comment for the press was:
No comment.

Next, she sensed that Percy was unfaithful--it was his chambermaid
this time-put detectives on his trail, and turned over their
findings to the vestrymen (the Episcopal administrative body) of
his church. On a given Sunday, when Grant was scheduled to preach,
they forced him to resign, and took down his name.

He was also required to pay back the $60,000, which wiped him out,
and at that time Juliet went about among the parishioners,
collecting funds to help. Most of the press, except for the Times,
was brutal, she said. No church but one, Guthrie's, St. Mark's in
the Bowery, would let him preach. In any case, the words would not
come any more.

As to the woman, she lived on, constantly under the surgeon's
knife, constantly giving sumptuous dinner parties at which all she
herself could eat was a little rice from a silver bowl--meanwhile
assuring the guests that this was simply the best way of
maintaining her (slim and lovely) shape.

At the very last meeting Percy and Juliet ever had--it was in a
drug store, and the conversation languished--she asked herself how
she could ever have loved him.

__________

With her final moments in the presence of 'Abdu'l-Baha, Juliet
brings her diary to a close.

On 5 December 1912, the ship sailed away, taking the Master out of
this hemisphere for always. Physically, He would be unobtainable
now. That was the last, sad day when He uttered His final spoken
words to America, words in time to be read by millions, then heard
by only a few. Florence Khanum remembered only four automobiles
coming to the pier, she and 'Ali Quli Khan being in the second one.
These two believers, as well as Juliet, although they could not
know it that day, would never look upon His earthly face again.

Juliet tells how, aboard the Celtic, more and more Baha'is crowded
into the Master's cabin, and how they all went above to a spacious
lounge. There, 'Ali Quli Khan translating (as the Star of the West
reports, giving his Baha'i name, Ishti'al), the Master paced up and
down as He spoke:

"The earth is ... one home, and all mankind are the children of one
father. ... Therefore ... we should live together in ... joy. ...
God is loving and kind to all men, and yet they show the utmost
enmity and hatred toward one another. ... You have no excuse to
bring before God if you fail to live according to His command,

[Photograph of Juliet Thompson in later years]

for you are informed of ... the good-pleasure of God. ... It is my
hope that you may ... stir the body of existence like unto a spirit
of life."

Then the visitors slowly left the ship, and Juliet described
'Abdu'l-Baha's final look "as He bade His immature children
farewell." That loving anguish, those weary, prescient eyes gazing
from His thin, ravaged face, are clearly seen in a photograph taken
by Underwood and Underwood at the last moment--and Life Magazine
(11 December 1950) reproduces it, but with less clarity: the
Master's look, from the rail of the ship, at the upturned faces of
the American Baha'is. Somehow, with Juliet, we were able in after
years to have three full-sized copies made from the old
photographic plate, and only just in time, for it broke then, as
a messenger carried it across New York.

__________

They still return to haunt the mind, those vanished days and nights
at Juliet's. I know the steps of those long gone still echo there.
I know the powerful chant of 'Abdu'l-Baha: "Glad tidings! Glad
tidings!" rebounds from wall to wall. Surely all is still there as
it was before: the spidery old chairs, the creaky, uncertain floor,
canvases looming down in the dark, coals in the grate. Juliet in
gold brocade and purple velvet: blonded, fluffy hair, smiling blue
eyes, a man on either side.

"You are not beautiful," her mother had told her. "You are not
handsome. You are lovely."

"There is a magic in Juliet's eyes," Dimitri Marianoff said.

Marzieh Gail San Francisco

Diary of Juliet Thompson: Chapter 2 Chapter 1 Chapter 3

The 'Akka Diary

19 June to 27 August 1909

Naples

19 June 1909

In Naples. In an old palace on the bay--the Via Partenope. Palaces
around us, ruined palaces on the hills. Vesuvius to our left, Capri
before us. This is the view from our window, Alice Beede's and
mine. Yet all the rich beauty of Italy is as fantasy to me. The
Reality of the Master[1] glows beyond. It is to the Master's heart
I would fly! And we are going to fly there! We arrived this noon
and sail tomorrow night for Egypt.

26 June 1909

As I write I look out on Mount Carmel, the flat-roofed white houses
of the East with their bright blue blinds in immediate view.

What can I say? I am speechless.

Jesus from the ground suspires. This line has been singing and
singing in my head all morning. And yet, it is more--oh, far
more--than that. The Spirit of the Living Redeemer is breathing its
peace into the air. As I sat side by side with Alice this morning
in our high whitewashed room, gazing and gazing toward Carmel
looming up in its great bare grandeur just before our eyes,
suddenly I felt that heart-consuming Spirit and melted into tears.

28 June 1909

(We are still here in the hotel at Haifa, Nassar's hotel. I am
sitting in the hall, looking through the wide window at the end,
across twelve miles of the bay to the Holy City. 'Akka, dreamed of
for nine long years--the Mecca of my prayers--is before my bodily
eyes! I am absolutely inarticulate. What I have felt, what I have
seen, is too vast to be expressed in human language. I can find no
words great enough to convey the impressions of these last three
days--or two days, I lose track of time! And as yet, I have not see
'Akka! In His infinite mercy and wisdom and love the Master is
preparing us; in his gentleness. Yet even the preparation has been
almost too much for the human heart.

That first sight of Carmel, with its Mystery, the Holy Mountain,
"the Mountain of the Lord," broke me down. I am still overpowered
when I look at it, and as I grow more sensitized I will surely feel
it more and more. Here the Divine Spirit breathes and reveals
itself. I know now. Ah, the poor human hearts to whom that Spirit
is not revealed, to whom the material is everything, who cannot
know of the Spiritual Kingdom surrounding them, who have not rent
the veil! Will they believe me when I return to testify? I would
"ascend to the cross" for them! To breathe this Truth into the
world I would give my own last breath with joy. I can now
understand the ecstasy of the martyrs. I pray to be one of them,
to be worthy of their destiny. I know now what the Master means by
the Holy Fragrances. I have come to the centre of their emanation.
The air is laden with the Divine Incense--verily, the Breath of
God. It is almost unbearable. I am immersed, lost in it. My prayers
used to grope through space. Now I am conscious of a close
communion with a heart-consuming Spirit of Love, a Spirit more
intensely real than the earth and all the stars put together, than
the essence of all human love, even than mother-love.

Later

28 June 1909

I have been sitting close to the window--my window into Heaven!--my
eyes fixed on 'Akka. The phenomenal world has faded away. This is
indeed, indeed the Reality. That City in the distance, white in the
sunlight, has been drawing the very soul out of me. I have been
feeling the Power of the Magnet there.

Although we were to go to 'Akka today with the Holy Mother and the
Holy Leaves,[2] dear Carrie's[3] illness, which began last night,
has prevented it. (It is hard to write; the two little boys, Sandy
and Howard Kinney, are playing around me.) Carrie will surely be
well in a few days and in this illness of hers some meaning must
be hidden. We are all drawing closer through it. An intensely
devoted, united group will enter the Presence of our Lord. Now I
shall try--only try--to tell you of what I have seen. These
privileged eyes ...

Friday afternoon, the day we came, Amin[4] and 'Inayatu'llah[5]
took us to the latter's house on Mount Carmel, just below the Tomb
of the Bab. A simple house, flat roofed, square, white, its doorway
an arch above rough stone steps; at each side of the arch a cypress
tree.

Two women were standing in the arch waiting to greet us. One seemed
to be a young girl. She wore a straight white gown, and a white
veil half covered her heavy dark hair with its two thick braids
hanging forward down her breast. Set in the midst of that frame of
hair was a little pale drooping face with eyes too big for it. This
was Khanum Diya, daughter of martyrs, the wife of 'Inayatu'llah.
The other was a tiny old lady. Her gown

was blue and her veil draped close, like a nun's, around her
withered aquiline face, which was the colour of old parchment. I
seemed to be back in the days of Jesus. Both received us with real
love.

Soon Mirza Asadu'llah[6] came in: a frail old man, his eyes so
luminous that they lighted his whole face and made him appear like
a spirit. His smile was full of humour. Then his wife entered. She
approached us with a glowing love and took each one of us into her
arms. Her dear little daughter, Farah-Angiz, served us with tea:
honey-coloured tea in delicate glasses. Then Mirza Asadu'llah, in
his turban and his long black 'aba, sitting by a grated window with
a stone water jar on its sill, taught us in simple words pearls of
wisdom. And I thought of what Percy Grant[7] had said to me: "It
is not what the Master will say, not even His life, which will
influence you, but His personality." For it was not the words, not
the wisdom, but a great sanctity emanating from them all that
overwhelmed me--a tangible strong holiness, a heavy perfume of
Spirit in the air pressing down upon my senses. I cannot express
it.

As well as I can remember, these were the words of Mirza
Asadu'llah, interpreted by Amin: "Your work is the work of the
disciples. You are the educators in America. And you must not be
discouraged that you have not yet seen results. It is like the work
of the parents who give the best years of their lives to their
children and perhaps die before the children are grown.

An ignorant person would say: 'How foolish are these parents to
give their best years to their children rather than to themselves
and their pleasures.' Likewise an ignorant bystander, watching a
farmer sowing in his field--let us say almond seed--might think:
'What a foolish man to take this almond, which he could eat and
enjoy, and bury it beneath the ground, where it will only
disintegrate.' Yet one who has knowledge of seed sowing would at
once see that the farmer is sowing one almond to reap
one-hundred-fold.

"The most effective teaching is that which is accomplished by
deeds, not the intellectual teaching. Words have their station, but
the station of deeds is higher. The effect of good deeds is certain
to appear in life. It may not be perceptible at first, but will be
so at the appointed time. As a famous poet has said: 'Achieve good
deeds and cast them into the River Euphrates. Some day their
effects will bloom in the Sahara of Arabia.'"

Then spoke the wife of Mirza Asadu'llah, her strong face glowing,
her eyes full of tears: "I know from my own case that this is true.
Did I not forsake my whole family in Persia, to be richly rewarded
now in this kinship with you from the West? For each dear one I
gave up in Persia I have found many in America, more precious to
me now even than my own kin, since the true relationship is of the
Spirit. In Persia my little son was stoned: and see, Mr Kinney,
what a father he found in America--in you!"

"Love," she added, 'is the basis of life."

Her intense emotion as she spoke penetrated into the core of our
beings. We wept. I rose, bent over her and kissed her and she
clasped me in her arms and held me close. Then something within me
opened. A fire of love never before experienced in my superficial
existence was kindled in my heart from that flame, her heart. By
the light of these saints, these torches of God, I see how, even
in my deepest moments, my life has been but a shallow stream.

Mr Kinney asked a question: "Although a life of good deeds is
certainly pleasing to God, is not a life given to the Cause of
greater value?"

Mirza Asadu'llah smiled and answered: "These are synonymous."

"The divine qualities," he continued, "should be real and innate.
They should well up spontaneously from the heart. One cannot prove
brotherhood by intellectual proofs. Is a man your brother because
Isaiah or Ezekiel said so? Two brothers do not need to prove that
they are brothers. So all you have to do is to truly love one
another. That love will accomplish all things."

From this blessed household we went to the Holy Household to visit
the Holy Leaves. I shall never forget that little procession as
they entered the room with the dignity of queens, led by the
Greatest Holy Leaf.[8] She was all in white: the Greatest Holy
Leaf, the daughter of the Blessed Perfection.[9] Her face had the
look of one who had passed through crucifixion and was resurrected
in another world. In it shone great blue eyes, eyes that had looked
upon many sorrows and now were ineffably tender. Behind her came
Tuba Khanum, Munavvar Khanum, [10] and Edna Ballora.

[Photograph: The Greatest Holy Leaf with the Ladies of the
household. Haifa, early 1900s.]

Ah, what can I say? Nothing but this: As a bud that was little and
hard opens in the sunlight, so my heart opened to a wealth of love
inconceivable to the human mind.

That night we went again to see the Holy Leaves. They are staying
in the house that Madame Jackson[11] built. We sat on the broad
marble steps, Mount Carmel looming, a dark mass, above us. Above
the mountain hung the moon. Down in the village the little white
dice-like houses, each with its pointed black cypress tree, were
a pale blue in the moonlight. The bay to our right splashed its
waves on the beach.

I whispered to Munavvar Khanum: "What is that--it cannot be
imagination--what is that breathing from Mount Carmel? It is too
strong for me. It is unbearable!"

I covered my face with my hands. Munavvar pressed close to me.

"Ah, you feel it too?" she whispered back.

I have not yet spoken of Ruha Khanum, the youngest daughter of our
Lord: beautiful, like a strong Madonna--with a great outgoing
warmth--and so human. Next day we had tea in her house. The high,
airy room in which we were received is painted white. A
linen-covered divan runs around the walls. There are no
decorations--no furniture even--just white simplicity. The Greatest
Holy Leaf was there, Tuba and Munavvar Khanum, and two little women
in blue with blue veils on their heads, relatives of the Bab.

We had already had tea at 'Inayatu'llah's with Asadu'llah and his
family. Mr Kinney had asked a question the answer to which I must
keep. "Some of the Theosophists claim that Christ was taught by the
Sufis. How are we to reply?"

Mirza Asadu'llah smiled. "Could the sun be lighted from a lamp? If
such knowledge originated with Sufis, why is it that they did not
manifest it as Christ did? The churches, the hospitals, the
illumined souls that sprang up from the seeds of Christ's
teachings, why is it that these effects did not appear from the
teachings of the Sufis, if Christ's teachings were born of theirs?"

After these blessed visits, Amin took Alice and me to an olive
grove on Mount Carmel where our Lord often walks. Elijah, too, had
walked in that same grove and among those very trees, so ancient
are they. The sun was setting behind the mountain. The sky was
opal. Flocks of sheep and of goats driven by singing shepherds
passed us on the road. Men in flowing dress and the circleted
kaffiyyih approached and passed us. A woman rode by on a donkey,
a long blue veil on her head, in her arms a baby.

That evening the ladies of the Holy Household came to see us and
we had a heavenly hour with them. Later in the night Carrie
developed a serious illness. The doctors (called in the next day),
Amin and a doctor from the British Hospital, said that it was
typhoid fever. There were unmistakable symptoms.

Carrie had been taken ill on Sunday night. On Monday we were to
have driven to 'Akka with the Holy Family. Early Monday morning I
hurried to their house to tell them of Carrie's illness and that,
of course, we could not go with them now. Immediately Tuba and
Munavvar returned to the hotel with me and we all went up into
Carrie's room, where she lay tossing on her bed with a terrifically
high fever. Munavvar and Tuba, standing by the bed, bent over it
with the tenderest love. "We will all pray for you, Carrie," they
said. "Our Lord will pray for you. His prayers are always
answered."

As Tuba bade me goodbye at the door of Nassar's hotel, she said,
"Tonight this will pass."

Munavvar too whispered, "Tonight."

At midnight it "passed". I was with Carrie when she woke up free
from fever. Tomorrow we leave for 'Akka.

But I have been very happy just staying here--perhaps too happy.
I have been afraid to meet my Lord. I long to see Him but feel
unutterably shy. How unworthy I am to stand in His Presence I
realize with my whole being. I remember a dream I had once in which
I was standing in Percy Grant's house and heard that the Master was
coming there soon--and I hid that His holy eyes might not see me.
That is the way I feel now. 'Akka

2 July 1909

I know I can only write brokenly, here in this Palace of the King.

We came here (can it be?) day before yesterday only.

My life is overturned by a cataclysm of the soul. Love for the Face
of my Lord fills my breast. This is REALITY, all else--a dream!

At sunrise of the day we came I climbed with Amin to the Tomb of
the Bab.

When we entered the Tomb the mystery of the Holy Mountain revealed
itself to me. Here was an essence, a concentration of holiness
diffused from this Secret Spot like rays shining from a veiled sun.
Yet, is the sun wholly veiled? I have never been able to look long
at the Tomb. It dazzles some inner sense in me.

After I returned: a knock on my door--and the voice of X! She had
just arrived, a complete surprise, from Egypt. How often I had
prayed that she might be with me in the healing Presence of our
Lord--and here she was in answer to my prayers! As she had come
without the required permission, we were obliged to leave her in
Haifa waiting for word from the Master. But He sent for her almost
at once, and now she is in 'Akka.

Never shall I forget that afternoon's journey. I was dazed, numb,
unable to realize--yet, afraid. For one thing I did realize--and
that was my own unworthiness. But the scenes through which we
passed should have helped me to realize, to sense, some of the
divine joy toward which we were travelling.

We were in the Holy Land. We were in a bygone age. We drove along
a wide white beach, so close to the sea that its little waves
curled over our carriage wheels. To our right, a long line of palm
trees. Before us, its domes and flat roofs dazzling white beneath
the deep blue sky: 'Akka, the Holy City, the New Jerusalem. Camels
approached us on the sand, driven by white-cloaked Bedouins, their
veils bound by circlets; or sheep, led by shepherds in tunics and
carrying crooks, striped head-cloths framing their faces. And once
there came a family, the woman riding a donkey, a child in her
arms, while a man walked beside her. The woman was wrapped in a
dark blue veil.

We forded the river Kishon, then Hebron, and at last reached the
walls of the Holy City, the City of Peace. Walls: walls within
walls, menacing walls. Tall, prison-like, chalk-white houses,
leaning together as they rose toward a rift of sky, slits of barred
windows set here and there in their forbidding fronts. Streets so
narrow that our carriage wheels grazed the buildings on either
side, streets sometimes bridged over by houses that met in an arch
at their second stories.

Suddenly a wide expanse before us. A garden. The seawall. The sea.
Our carriage stopped. I knew we were at the door of the Master. My
heart almost ceased to beat. I felt we had arrived too soon, too
suddenly, that I was too unprepared.

The curtains of the carriage were raised. In front of a great stone
house, very picturesque and rambling, stood a group of men in
turbans, long white robes, and dark 'abas (cloaks) with faces
miraculously pure--shining, smiling--whose hearts seemed to welcome
us. Then one with a very tender face: Siyyid Asadu'llah, an old
man, led us through an arch to a great inner courtyard open to the
sky, where two giant palm trees stood in the midst of flower beds.
Two stairways of old worn stone, one on either side of the
courtyard and diagonally opposite each other, led directly to the
third floor, on which the Holy Household lived. The railing of the
stair leading to the Master's room was vine covered.

As I entered the court, a great spasm of feeling convulsed me. My
unworthiness overwhelmed me. The light of the inner court was too
strong. I sobbed and bowed my head.

The Kinneys and Alice had gone ahead of me. I followed them up the
stairs with the vines, across a small open court with low white
walls, to a room next to the Master's. This room I was to share
with Alice.

Soon Edna Ballora came in. She took me to the window. Outside was
a large square of bare ground, four trees in a row at a little
distance; beyond these a street of tall houses, and to the right,
at the foot of the double sea wall, a long, narrow garden.

[Photograph of Siyyid Asadu'llah]

"The Master is in the garden," said Edna.

He was in white, seated at the side of a wall in the centre of the
garden, surrounded by guests.

My first thought as I saw that Figure was God Almighty!--such was
the majesty and purity. I then thought: King of men! Lion of the
tribe of Judah![12]

Soon He came into our room. He burst into it like the sun, with His
joyous greeting, "Marhaba! Marhaba!" (Welcome! Welcome!) And His
effulgence struck me blind.

Alice fell at His feet. I could not kneel. I could not do anything.
At last, I knelt for a moment. Then He led us to the divan by the
window and, speaking formally to me, placed me at a distance from
Him; while to Alice, again at His feet, He spoke with smiling
tenderness.

Sitting in the corner of the divan, now surer than ever of my
unworthiness, I prayed: O God, remove this thing which separated
me from my Lord!

Suddenly He changed His seat. "Biya!" (Come!) He called to me
lovingly, drawing me close to His side.

He asked me many questions, answered by Alice, for still I could
not speak. When the father of John saw the angel, he was struck
dumb for days,[13] and I was in the Presence of the Lord of
angels--of the long expected One, heralded for ages from the
mountain of the Lord.

The great overwhelming Spirit in Him, the Divinity of His Being
deprives one of all one's powers, even the power of sensation, for
a time. Yet He makes Himself so simple: in the mercy of His Love,
in His great God-tenderness, bends so close to us.

Suddenly my heart burst open to the outpouring from

His Heart, like a rose beneath strong sunbeams. A beam seemed to
pierce my heart. At that instant He flashed a lightning glance at
me. When He left the room, as He did almost at once, my breast
dilated as if a bird were spreading wings in it. I went to the
window. Just as I did so, Munavvar appeared in the doorway. "The
Master is calling you, Juliet," she said, and she led me to His
room.

That dear little room, wood panelled, with its white-canopied bed,
its divan, its simple little dressing table, and on the windowsill
two stone water jars: nothing more. He was sitting on the divan at
the end nearest the door, and when I entered, He beckoned me to His
side. As I passed Him to take my seat I wanted to kneel at his
knees--my own knees almost drew me down. But, fearing to be
insincere, I would not yield. He took my hand in His--His so
mysterious Hand--so delicately made, so steely strong, currents of
life streaming from it.

"Are you well? Are you happy?"

But my lips seemed to be locked. I was helpless to open them.

"Speak--speak to Me!" He said in English.

A sacred passion had been growing in my heart: my heart was almost
breaking with it.

"Is not my heart speaking to Thee, my Lord?"

"Yes, your heart is speaking to Me and your spirit is speaking to
Me. I hear, I know."

Then he inquired for the two believers I cared for least.

Of one I could honestly say when he returned from 'Akka he was on
fire.

"And he remained but a few days," said our Lord. Then: "Do not
think your services are unknown to Me. I have seen. I have been
with you. I know them all. Do

not think I have not known. I have known all. For these you are
accepted in the Kingdom."

My "services"--and He knew them all! He had "seen": seen their
pitiful smallness and the lack of real love with which I had tried
to serve. I bowed my head with shame.

"Forgive my failures."

"Be sure of this." After a moment He said again, "Be sure of this."
Then He dismissed me.

As I passed Him the second time, my knees did draw me down; my
heart drew me down to His feet.

Later that evening He came to our door, a blue door in the
whitewashed wall, leading out into the open court. We knelt in the
doorway, Alice and I.

"We are at home, Lord," I said, "at home, for the first time."

"Yes. Home, home. It is your home."

That night at dinner I sat on His left. Ah, the little dining room!
It opens on the court, at right angles with the Master's door. It
is simple and small and white and its two windows face the sea.

This is what He said at table, looking again and again toward the
window, sometimes raising those wonderful eyes to the sky,
sometimes closing them, waiting--communing with One Whom we could
not see, then speaking.

Mr Kinney had said to the interpreter: "We have no questions to
ask. We wish Him to fill our spiritual needs."

Then our Lord: "The most important thing is that which comes
through the Spirit--the Breath of the Holy Spirit. The soul through
the Spirit can realize the Kingdom. The soul can recognize and feel
the Love of God. Distance cannot prevent the receiving of spiritual

bounties. Hills and mountains cannot check that! Why? Because of
the chains and bonds of the Spirit. The sun is very far, in the
highest position. There is a great distance between earth and sun,
yet remoteness and distance cannot prevent its rays from shining
on us.

"Without firmness there will be no result. Trees must be firm in
the ground to give fruit. The foundation of a building must be very
solid in order to support the building. If there be the slightest
doubt in a believer, he will be without result. How often did
Christ warn Peter to be steadfast! Therefore, consider how
difficult it is to remain firm, especially in the time of trials.
If man endure and overcome the trials, the more will he become firm
and steadfast. When the tree is firmly rooted, the more the wind
blows the more the tree will benefit; the more intense the wind the
greater the benefit. But if weak, it will immediately fall.

"As Christ foretold, we will take the real food in the Kingdom with
the Father. That is the real meeting. It has no limit, no end, no
separation."

1 July 1909

The next morning at six we were called to early tea.

I wish I could give you a picture of this dear old shabby,
beautiful palace, become the most intimate of homes to me.

Opening from the little court, that chalk-white court, so glaring
in the sun, a great grey hall with stone walls and a mosaic floor.
A bare hall, except for the richness of the floor and two high
perches, a macaw on each--splashes of scarlet and emerald and blue
against the expanse of grey. Little birds hopping about on the
floor like familiar spirits. Opening from the hall, to the right--a
wall full of arched windows opposite its entrance--a very high
whitewashed room with linen-covered divans lining its walls and a
large straw mat on its stone floor. This was the room where every
day we had prayers and early tea with our Lord.

That wonderful tea hour in the fresh morning! First there was the
Persian chanting. Then tea was served. The Master always sat in the
right-hand corner of the divan by one high window, correcting the
Tablets dictated to His secretaries, the small, glazed,
ivory-coloured leaf of parchment in His left hand. Around Him on
the divan we sat with the Holy Family. Along the divan and on the
floor sat the families of martyrs, a number of children among them,
whom the Master had taken under His own care. The samovar stood on
the floor at the entrance on a Persian tea-cloth, a beautiful
happy-faced woman behind it serving the tea. She had deep dimples
in her cheeks and her hair hung in thick black braids, a white veil
partly covering it.

Her story was this: Years before in Persia, when she was a bride
fifteen years old, she was with her mother-in-law in a room of
their house on the ground floor when suddenly they heard a howling
mob outside. And then a severed head was thrown through the window
and rolled to the young bride's feet. It was the head of her
husband, a boy of nineteen. The girl fainted, but the mother
quietly rose, took the head of her son to the washstand and washed
off the blood, then carried it to the window and threw it out to
the mob. "What we have given to God," she said, "we do not ask
back."

As we entered the tea-room the Master asked how we were. Were we
happy? Had we slept well? "Here," He said, "you cannot be very
comfortable. In New York it is better and more beautiful than
here." He smiled and added, "There it is beautiful. You have parks
and trees. But here the heart is good."

"You have all received letters from me," He said, continuing to
correct a Tablet. Then, handing one to Munavvar Khanum, "This is
a Tablet to an American believer which I have just corrected."

In the Tablet He had said, "Thank God you are all helpers." And I
had just been thinking: Never can we hope to help this All-Powerful
Being. He had spoken of the Word of God as having created unity
among Muslims, Jews, and Christians and said that through the power
of the Blessed Perfection we had all been made as one soul in many
bodies, one light in many lamps; therefore we should strive to
spread and increase this unity and love.

Then He began to speak to us: "Thank God that He has gathered us
all together here. Before this Cause was established the East and
the West never met. But now, since the Cause is established in
Persia and America, the East and West are united, happy, and in
perfect love with one another. It is only a great Power that can
accomplish this. Formerly in Persia it was impossible for
Christians, Muslims, and Jews to be friends and to meet lovingly;
but now, in this same Persia, all creeds come together in perfect
love. I hope all will make an effort that this love and union may
progress." Then, turning away and gazing out of the window as
though He were looking into the future: "That all religions may
become one; all people be of one creed; all nations as one; that
all differences may be removed. And this is what I hope."

1 July 1909

At luncheon Our Lord asked for news of Mr MacNutt.[14] Mr Kinney
spoke of the unity in New York.

Our Lord said: "You have been the bearers of such good news that
I want to make you very happy. Good news indicates good deeds.
Unity is the result of good deeds and action. At the present time
there are good believers in America--sincere and firm in the
Covenant.

"Man first is like a pupil. He becomes learned. Then he becomes a
teacher. First he is a patient. He must attain perfect health.
Having attained it, he may become a doctor. At first you are
children. You become mature. Now you must be like fathers and
mothers." Each time He made a point He smiled His marvellous smile,
looking at one or another of us.

"I desire that each of you become so great that each may guide a
nation. Now the friends must endeavour to attain such stations so
as to teach the people of America. Divine qualities are unlimited.
For this reason you must not be satisfied with one quality, but
must try to attain all. Each of us must improve himself, that he
may attain nothing short of the best. When one stops, he descends.
A bird, when it is flying, soars; but as soon as it stops, it
falls. While man is directed upward, he develops. As soon as he
stops, he descends. Therefore I wish the beloved of God always to
ascend and develop.

"There exist in man two powers. One power uplifts him. This is
divine attraction, which causes man's elevation. In all grades of
existence he will develop through this power. This belongs to the
spirit. The other power causes man to descend. This is the animal
nature. The first attracts man to the Kingdom. The second brings
him down to the contingent world. Now we must consider which of
these will gain more power. If the heavenly power overcome, man
will become heavenly, enlightened, merciful; but if the worldly
power overcome, he will be dark, satanic, and like the animal.
Therefore he must develop continually. As long as the heavenly
power is the great force, man will ascend.

"I have met many of the beloved of God this year. Therefore I am
very happy."

__________

(Footnote added in Brumana, Syria, where I was copying my rough
notes: I think of Him often as sitting there at the table. I see
Him there often. But I cannot write of it. I found it impossible
at first to raise my eyes to the Splendour of His Face. But later
I had many marvellous glimpses.

2 July 1909

Early morning tea

After those first dear fatherly questions--Were we well? Were we
happy? Had we slept well?--He said: "Our real happiness is of the
Kingdom. Here we seek no happiness, because in this world happiness
does not exist. If you consider, you will see that people are all
in trouble. The majority of people whom you question have nothing
to tell you but of their troubles! Their hearts are not at rest.
And they cannot have this rest of heart but through the Love of
God. Therefore we must know that happiness exists in the other
world and not in this."

Still correcting the Tablets, He said: "There are many letters I
should write, because I have to communicate with the East and
West."

Handing a Tablet to Munavvar Khanum: "This is the Tablet in regard
to events that have happened in Persia."

He asked me not to take it down. It referred to political
conditions in Persia and prophesied that unless these changed and
union was effected between the opposing sides, foreign powers would
step in and divide the country.[15] After this, He said lovingly:
"It is very nice to see you here--that you have at last reached
here. Tomorrow I am going to take you, Myself, to the Tomb of
Baha'u'llah. I was going to take you today, but as I am busy and
have to take the Governor out, I cannot do so."

2 July 1909

Later in the morning

He sent for me. My self-consciousness, my shyness had made me feel
shut out from Him, but my heart had been continually crying out,
with ever-increasing love, to Him. When I entered His little room
and knelt at His feet and looked up into eyes of Love which I
suddenly found I could meet, He put out His hand and said, "Now;
now!"

I laid my head on His knee. The tears came. He lifted my face and
wiped them away. "God shall wipe away all tears."[16] Ah, this
blessed Day!

I cannot remember exactly what happened, only that Love
immeasurable flowed out from Him and was reflected in my poor
heart. One thing I do remember. When He lifted my face, while He
was wiping away my tears, He said in a voice of infinite sweetness,
like the sighing of the wind which "bloweth where it listeth and
we know not whence it cometh or whither it goeth":[17] "Speak.
Speak to Me!"

His words in English sink into your very soul. What I lose by not
understanding Persian!

"O my Lord, may my life speak to you!" I cried.

Then I presented Him with the petitions:

First I gave Him Lua's[18] and read Him a portion of one of her
letters, speaking of her tests and difficulties.

"You love Lua?" He asked in that voice of heart-piercing sweetness,
that voice which is indeed the calling of the Spirit, the
instrument of Divine Love. "She is dear to you? Your friend?"

"She is my mother. I love her with my whole soul. Thy Love," I
said, "has united so many hearts in eternal bonds." I spoke of my
love for May Maxwell.

"Your sister?" He asked.

"My sister and my mother too."

"Your mother." He said it was this that made Him happy: to see that
the sisters loved one another.

"Help me to love all," I begged. "In this I have failed."

"This is what I wish for you: that you will love all."

"With Thy help."

I gave Him the letter from Mr MacNutt. He smiled at the name. I
mentioned Laura Barney's beautiful goodness to me and prayed for
blessings for her.

"Khayli khub. Khayli khub," (Very good.) He said.

I gave Him Mother Beecher's[19] message.

Munavvar Khanum translated: "Our Lord will pray for her that she
will attain to all she wishes."

I gave Him Mrs Parsons'[20] message, that she longed to establish
a spiritual city on the Potomac, the inhabitants of which would
live for the good of the whole rather than the one, and asked that
the way might be opened for her to come to see Him; also whether
she should come alone or bring her family.

"My lord, you know Mrs Parsons?"

"I know. I know." Then he said, "That city I hope will be a
spiritual city and that the people of such a city will be perfectly
united. In a physical city, of course, it is impossible to have
everyone united. But in a spiritual city it is possible that all
be united and in every way cemented. The spiritual city is like the
sea, and the inhabitants of this city are like the waves of the
sea. In every way they are connected and united. I hope she will
be able to build such a city as this. I hope she will be able to
do all the services she wishes and that the way will be opened for
her to come."

His eyes were half closed as He gave this message. He seemed to be
communing with her.

I read Him Bernard Ginzig's message, that "He had heard the voice
of the Spirit in the realm of art; that he was a seeker of truth
in the world of mysteries."

"Tell him: Give thanks to God that you are a seeker after the
mysteries of existence and ask God that He reveal to you the
Mystery of the Kingdom. Should you know all the mysteries of the
world and know nothing of the Mystery of the Kingdom, it is
useless. To know the mysteries of the world is very good when this
knowledge is joined with the knowledge of the Mystery of the
Kingdom."

He also said it was good for Bernard Ginzig to follow the art of
designing.

In my hand, among the supplications with which I had been
entrusted, was a letter from Barakatu'llah[21] to me. As he had not
known, when he wrote, that I was going to 'Akka and as his letter
therefore contained no message, it was just in remembrance of him
that I had taken it to our Lord. In it he said he feared I had
forgotten him. I did not read it to our Lord, only held it up,
saying: "This is my last letter from Mr Barakatu'llah."

"You love Mr Barakatu'llah?"

"Oh yes, my Lord!"

He smiled.

"Write to him and say that you are in 'Akka and say that you wish
very much to have him here too. Tell him you have not forgotten
him!" (with a sudden captivating smile, tipping His head to one
side, and looking at me very knowingly). "Tell him you have not
forgotten him and that you wish he were here with you. Say that you
mentioned his name in the Presence of 'Abdu'l-Baha and He gave you
this message for him: that 'Abdu'l-Baha says He loves him very much
and He will pray for him that he may be assisted to do some work
in Japan. Until now the Word of God has not been raised in Japan.
Perhaps he may become the cause of its being proclaimed there. In
every country in which a new founder appears who will raise there
the words of the Kingdom,

[Photograph: A group of New York Baha'is (c. 1912)]

that man will be greatly helped. Therefore 'Abdu'l-Baha hopes that
he (Mr Barakatu'llah) will become wonderfully assisted."

I gave Him Claudia Coles' message.

"Give My salaams to Claudia Coles and say: I will pray for her that
she may obtain all her desires and that everything, including
herself, will be exactly as she wishes."

I read Him Mrs Ives'[22] long message.

"Say that she must continue to do to this man as she has been
doing, she and Mother Beecher both. She must not change. She must
try to be kind to him.

"First: herself. She must make every effort to enlighten her soul
and to attain to such a condition where no sorrow or disappointment
will have any effect upon her. The condition of entire and complete
submission is the best one, for when one reaches this condition one
is perfectly submissive to everything. And when she will be so, she
will entirely forget her own will and ask nothing but the Will of
God. Whatever is done in this world is the Will of God. And since
one, when in this condition, has no will of his own, his will is
the Will of God and whatever he does is the Will of God."

I supplicated that she might come and look upon His face.

"Khayli khub," He said. (Very good; very well.)

To Mary Little: "I will pray for her and ask help from the Kingdom
for her and pray that she may become as she wishes."

To Bertie Warfield: "Give her my greetings and love. Tell her I
have accepted her love."

"How do you like all these messages?" He said, smiling His smile
of enchantment. "I give you such long messages because of the love
in your heart. It is for this I love you--because you are so
sincere and have a great love in your heart and love many of the
believers. I see a great love in your heart. That is why I love
you."

I said: "If I have any love, it is Thy gift to me. I pray for the
universal love, that I may love all, my Lord."

"Insha'llah! That is what I desire for you: that you love each and
all; that you love all the people of the world. This is My wish for
you."

Just then X was announced. Our Lord asked Munavvar Khanum to bring
her in.

Then Munavvar returned with X. We two had a sacred meeting with our
Lord. She spoke so tenderly of me. He answered tenderly. He then
sent for Alice Beede. As she entered the room He said, with His
enchanting smile: "Friends? Friends?"

Alice spoke up in her impulsive way. "If people are your friends
they are mine."

"All are My friends. Each; every one." (In English:) "My friends.
My friends."

I was moved to take X's hand.

"She is mine?" I asked. "Mine forever?"

He smiled and said, "Yes. Yes."

Next He sent for Carrie. And when we were all at His feet, Munavvar
interpreting for us. He said: "I hope a great love may be
established among you and that day by day this love will increase.
I have gathered you all together here that you may be gathered in
the same way in the Kingdom of God, and that you may love one
another very, very much. If you love one another as you should, it
is just as though you had loved me as you should. The more you love
one another, the nearer you get to Me. I go away from this world,
but Love stays always. Therefore you should love one another very
much. And I hope that you will become the cause of establishing
great love among humankind and that, through the help and
assistance of God, you will be able to establish in this world the
Love of God. Baha'u'llah endured all these hardships and
difficulties only for the sake of establishing Love in this world."

X said: "I wish I might be like this rose and exhale such
fragrances."

Our Lord: "One could be much more beautiful than this rose. For the
rose perishes. Its fragrance is just for a time. No winter has any
effect upon such a Rose as Man."

"I wish," said Alice, "that when we go home we may be able to
diffuse what we have received here."

Our Lord: "As I have said before: Man first is like a pupil. He
becomes a learned man; then he becomes a teacher. First he is a
patient. He must attain perfect health, and, having attained it,
he can become a doctor. What I wish to say is that those who have
attained the Kingdom of God will themselves become doctors. All the
people of the world are patients, are ill. They are in great need
of doctors, so that through the help of the doctors they may be
cured of their spiritual diseases.

"The life of man will at last end in this world. We must all take
out of this life some fruit. The tree of one's existence must bear
fruit. If a tree has not fruit you must cut it down and burn it.
It would be useless for other purposes. And what is the fruit of
the human tree? It is the Love of God. It is love for humankind.
It is to wish good for all the people of the earth. It is service
to humanity. It is truthfulness and honesty. It is virtues and good
morals. It is devotion to God. It is the education of souls. Such
are the fruits of the human tree. Otherwise it is only wood,
nothing else."

"Thou hast been so merciful, my Lord, to permit X to come while I
am here."

"It is for your sake. You must be sure when you are with her to say
only those things that will help her, for should she do anything
wrong again it would not be good for the Cause."

"My Lord," I said, weeping, "I am so conscious of my own
imperfections I can never feel hers are greater than mine."

"You must never think of your own imperfections, but of the Power
of Baha'u'llah which can free you from all."

I was kneeling at His feet. Raising my hands I said: "Dear Lord,
free me from this terrible self-consciousness." (For the fact,
often proved, that he knew every thought in my mind had put me into
a dreadful state. Thoughts I could never really have thought would
come flying into my head like evil, fantastic birds--and I knew He
read them!)

"I will pray for you that you may be freed from it."

Again the tears came to my eyes and again He wiped them away,
smiling His divine smile.

"I supplicate for X, dear Lord. I love her with all my soul."

"I hope she may overcome and be exactly the opposite of what she
has been in the past. I will pray for her."

3 July 1909

Early morning tea

Our Lord: "I want to tell you that most of the nations and the
majority of the people are in perfect ignorance.

They are trying night and day to do something to destroy the
foundation of man. There are among them political fights and wars.
There are conflicts and disturbances. Every day they are inventing
new instruments for the destruction of human life. There are among
them also religious disputes and conflicts and disputes of
patriotism. You hardly find two men between whom there is real
harmony and sympathy.

"Now you must do your best, so that you may be able to remove all
these conflicts and disputes. You will change this darkness into
light; you will change this hatred and menace into love and
harmony, because your aim is a glorious one.

"It is sure you will have to endure many difficulties in this Cause
and that great obstacles will come before you. You will have many
hindrances. But you must confront all and you must endure all these
difficulties.

"You must give up all differences among you--differences of
opinion--and all work for the same aim. You must be qualified with
divine attributes, so that the Word of God may assist you, so that
the bounties of God may descend upon you. And know that without the
help of the Holy Spirit you will not be able to do this. And the
magnetism of the Word of God is sincerity of intention. And until
you are entirely severed from yourself and emptied of yourself, you
will never be sincere enough.

"You must entirely sacrifice yourself. You must close your eyes to
all rest. You must give up even your happiness and your enjoyments
so that you may be able to do this.

"It is true that you will be blamed very much and you will have
some difficulties and troubles. It is sure that people will show
enmity toward you, and it is possible your own relatives even will
try to oppose you. But you must be firm. And if you will be firm
and steadfast, be sure that you will become victorious. You will
be the cause of the union of the world of humanity.

"As Christ said to a rich man: 'Go, and give all you have, and take
up your cross and come and be My follower.'[23] This saying of
Christ's indicates that unless one is free from everything, one
cannot be a real follower of Christ."

3 July 1909

Luncheon

Our Lord: "Jesus Christ said: 'Freely have ye received; freely must
ye give.'[24] That is to say: Man has received the bounty of the
Kingdom for nothing, so you must give it to others as you have
received it. That is to say, not to wish for any reward or
compensation from the people. You should ask your reward of God.

"But in this new Revelation many of the believers have attained the
Kingdom of God with great difficulty. They gave much to obtain it.

"The Blessed Bab and Baha'u'llah were the Possessors of the
Kingdom. They gave the Kingdom to the people. But they had many
trials and difficulties. The Bab exposed His breast to thousands
of bullets from the enemy. Baha'u'llah, too, spent all His life in
the prisons. The beloved of God obtained the Kingdom by the
sacrifice of their lives, under calamities and oppressions. Their
houses were destroyed and their honour lost. All their properties
were pillaged. Their families and children were taken as captives,
and at last they themselves were martyred. Now consider how
difficult it was for these people to obtain the Kingdom. Not
withstanding this, the Kingdom is so great that still they received
the Kingdom freely!

"Now the purpose is this: that you also should procure the Kingdom
with so many sacrifices. It is possible you may have these
calamities and difficulties. The people will accuse you, blame you
and injure you, but you must show forth firmness and steadfastness.
And should there be no trials, nothing will be accomplished. But
when trials appear many will greatly develop. That is to say: those
who are sincere believers, firm in the Cause, will develop and
advance; but, on the contrary, those who are weak in their faith
will escape. But My hope is that you will show forth firmness."

"Tell Miss Juliet Thompson," He said suddenly, laughing, "that I
am going to strike her. Others are delicate, but she is strong and
can stand it." He laughed again. "I am going to beat her."

"It has seldom happened in any age or cycle that women have been
killed as martyrs, but in this great Revelation many women have
been martyred. It happened many times that enemies among the women
collected together, striking and beating a Baha'i woman. Still they
could not appease their hostility, their rage, by striking. They
bit with their teeth. And this was due to their great rage."

The Master laughed all through this, from the time He mentioned my
name to the end, a strange laugh. I was sitting by His side at this
meal.

3 July 1909

Dinner

Our Lord: "All animals and birds sleep early. This is the creative
law of God. The birds sleep early. The rule is to sleep very early.
This is God's wish. Children wish to go to bed early. Gradually man
acquires the habit of sleeping later. To sleep at sunset is the law
of God. All children, birds and animals sleep involuntarily.

"His Holiness Christ manifested in these countries, but in the
beginning His Cause was spread in Europe and it superseded all
other religions, notwithstanding that in Asia there were many
religions, such as Zoroastrianism, Judaism, the star-worshippers
and idolaters, who are still existing in India. But in Europe and
America His Cause overcame all others. Now it is our hope that
although this Truth was revealed in this part of the world, it will
be spread and promulgated throughout America and Europe.

"His Holiness Christ said: 'The Children of the Kingdom will go out
from it, but from the uttermost parts of the earth many will come
and enter into it.'[25]

Now the inhabitants of Syria are bereft, for they have no capacity,
but you, who live in remote countries, have caught this Light. The
people from around here are deprived, but you from such far
countries have attained.

"A blind man, though he sit near the light, cannot see it; but a
clear-sighted man can see from afar. A man afflicted with a cold,
if he be in a rose garden, cannot inhale the fragrances, but one
whose nostrils are pure can inhale from a long distance. The people
who are in these cities are deaf and blind, but you, having an open
eye and a pure nostril, can see the Light from afar and inhale the
fragrances of this Rose Garden.

"Is this clear to you?"

4 July 1909

Early morning tea

Munavvar Khanum chanted a prayer.

Our Lord: "In this prayer which we have just read, Baha'u'llah
meant 'Abdu'l-Hamid, the Turkish Sultan who has lately been
deposed,[26] and the verses are:

'I implore Thee, O My God and the King of the nations, and ask Thee
by the Greatest Name, to change the throne of tyranny into a centre
of justice and the seat of pride and iniquity into the chair of
humbleness and justice. Thou art free to do whatsoever Thou wishest
and Thou art the All-Knowing, the Wise!'"

"A Power above the power of kings," I whispered to Munavvar.

"And still," she whispered back, "and still we ask for miracles."

__________

That day, the fourth of July, He took us Himself to the Holy
Tomb[27] in the morning.

I realize now why the Gospels are written so simply. I find I am
only able to state bare facts. But these surely are more eloquent
than all human comment on them. Let me give them to you, then,
simply:

First, with a father's tender care, He came to the carriage with
us and watched us start. At the house in Bahji He joined us in a
cool, whitewashed room, its door and window-trimmings painted blue,
the usual linen-covered divan lining its walls, under three wide
windows. Outside stood wonderful trees, like still sentinels
guarding the Tomb. Sanctity hung in the air, a brooding spirit.
Nowhere else in the world is the beauty of nature so impregnated
with the soul of Beauty, a reflection from another world. In the
air of 'Akka and Carmel is--Life.

On a table was [a] single photograph, Lua's. Our Lord called me to
sit by His side, then, pointing to the photograph, said: "Your
friend!"

I got it and placed it on a little table close to His elbow,
between the couch where He sat and my own chair. As I did this His
face lit up with a smile of heaven.

Tea was brought in--in the little clear glasses always used in
'Akka--and He served us with His own hands. Then, seating Himself
again on the divan, He called the four children who were with us:
two of his own little grandsons (Shoghi Effendi and Ruhi)[28] and
the two Kinney boys, and with a lavish tenderness, a super
abundance of overflowing love, such as could only have come from
the very Centre and Source of Love, He drew all four to His knees,
clasped them in His arms, which enclosed them all, gathered and
pressed and crushed them to His Heart of hearts. Then He set them
down on the floor and, rising, Himself brought their tea to them.

Words absolutely fail me when I try to express the divine picture
I saw then. With the Christ-love radiating from Him with the
intensest sweetness I have yet witnessed, He stooped to the floor
Himself to serve the little children, the children of the East and
the children of the West. He sat on the floor in their midst, He
put sugar into their tea, stirred it and fed it to them, all the
while smiling celestially, an infinite tenderness playing on the
great Immortal Face like white light. I cannot express it! In a
corner sat an old Persian believer, in a state of complete
effacement before his Lord, his head bowed, his eyelids lowered,
his hands crossed on his breast. Tears were pouring down his
cheeks.

Then our Lord took a chair and, facing the windows, pointed out
these beautiful trees to us. In His spread white robes, with His
majesty of pose--a sudden overwhelming majesty, after that tender
humility (in a way Michaelangelesque, only far transcending that),
yet with the divine sweetness that is never absent, no matter how
tremendous the Power displayed--He appeared at first glance as the
King of kings to me; the next instant once more the Spirit of the
Christ, the Son, flashed upon me. Then, the two aspects were one.

He said: "We cannot in this world realize the bounty of God, nor
can we appreciate His Love, but in the next world we can do so.

"When man is in the world of the womb, God showers upon him all
blessings. He gives him all the organs, eyes, ears, etc. But man
cannot put this favour into use there; it is not manifest there.
When the child is born from the world of the womb into this world,
then all those blessings and gifts which God showered upon him in
the world of the womb become manifest and useful. His gifts were
not known in the world of the womb, though men did possess them
there, but the world of the womb had not the capacity to receive
the manifestation of these gifts. Similarly with the gifts and
blessings which God showers upon man in this world. This world is
not fit and has not the capacity for the manifestation of these
gifts and blessings. But when man enters the

[Photograph: Baha'is visiting the Shrine of Baha'u'llah (c. 1900).]

World of the Kingdom, then those gifts will be manifested.

"For example, one of the gifts of God is to be able to pay a visit
to the Holy Tomb, but man cannot fully realize it while in this
world. But when he enters the World of the Kingdom, there the
blessings and gifts will become evident and clear.

"Is this clear to you?"

Then, giving us each a handful of jasmine, He led us one by one to
the jasmine-strewn threshold of the Holy Tomb. As He led me, His
hand quickened me. Never can I forget its vital, tingling pressure.

We knelt at the Divine Threshold. Suddenly, He was beside us:
luminous, silent. Bending, He anointed our foreheads with attar of
rose. Then He lifted each of us to our feet. And then, in a voice
which struck across my heart, causing my entire being to quiver,
the memory of which even now pierces and wrings my heart, He
chanted.

When He had finished He asked Mr Kinney to chant. I could scarcely
bear the thought of a human voice following His. Yet Mr Kinney sang
beautifully: "O Lord, make us pure and without desire." My whole
being echoed this prayer.

Our Lord then requested us all to sing, and the hymn we chose was
"Nearer, My God, to Thee."

While our Lord was chanting I could not look at Him, but during the
singing that followed, I kept my face turned toward Him. I still
see Him standing by the window, the translucence of that majestic
profile, the grandeur of that luminous head, white turbaned against
the white wall.

We left the Holy Tomb.

"Come and I will show you My garden," said our Lord. "Come, follow
Me."

With the little children--Sandy pressed close to one side, Howard
to the other--He led us. In folds indescribably graceful, His white
robes blew about His Figure. Divineness breathed from it. That
which He manifested then was the tender Love of the Good Shepherd.
We followed in His Footsteps over the stony field: His garden?

"Other sheep have I that are not of this fold ... My sheep shall
know My voice ... And there shall be one fold, one Shepherd."[29]
As I followed, my heart chanted this.

Having gone about a quarter of a mile, He stopped and pointed out
over the Mediterranean.

"Look," He said, "the sea, the sea!"

Mr Kinney said, "America lies beyond."

Then our Lord: "America and this land are one. The world is one--is
one!" (in His ringing English). "America and this land are one. The
five continents of the world are one. All the nations are one,
through the Power of Baha'u'llah."

By "His garden" did He not mean the united world-to-be?

__________

In the morning we were all siting in our room (Alice Beede's and
mine), Carrie and X with Alice and myself, and were discussing
something and not agreeing and getting inharmonious, when there
came a tap at the door. And there stood the Master, in white in the
sunlight, His hands full of jasmine for us.

Later in the day, after our return from the Tomb, another sort of
talk was going on in our room. Someone said something off-colour.
It was carried on by someone else. Remembering our sacred morning,
my soul rebelled against it. Again came the tap at the door. We
were not dressed, not ready to receive our Lord, to open to Him.

That night He called us into His room--His small, dark,
wood-panelled room, very dark now with only two candles burning in
it, their little flames flickering as a breeze blew through the
window. He looked so mysterious, so unearthly in the dim light. We
seated ourselves at His feet.

"How are you?" He asked, "Are you happy? You should be happy after
your visit to the Blessed Tomb today. Did you think of Lua?"

X and I told Him that we had. Carrie said she had thought of each
and all the believers as they sat in the hall during the meetings.
His face lit up with that marvellous smile with which He always
blesses us when we speak of our love for others.

"Very good. Very good. That is what pleases God."

Alice said, "It is the Fourth of July, the day we Americans
celebrate our independence."

Our Lord: "Yes, it is a good day in America, the day of your
physical freedom. But today you celebrated your spiritual freedom.
Physical freedom is a good thing, but spiritual freedom is of
greater importance. Really the first thing is to have the soul
free. And you must be very happy to have attained spiritual freedom
on the same day when you attained physical freedom. I hope that as
on this day you attained the physical freedom, in the same way you
will be free from all passionate desires and human inclinations.

Then He went on: "The world is in prison and bondage through the
leaders of religions who have taken the Spirit captive.

"The Jewish rabbis have always tried to convince the people that
their religion is the true one, that they are the chosen nation by
being descendants of Abraham, and that they are the only people who
can enter the Kingdom.

"Likewise the Catholic priests. What they say to the people is
this: that they possess the true religion, they are the accepted
people of God and they alone can be saved.

"Likewise the Shaykhs.[30] They speak against the Christians and
say: 'God had a Son and the people crucified this Son of God!' They
say: 'What a foolish thing these Christians teach--that God could
have a Son and He, the Son of God, was crucified by human hands!'

"You see how the heads of each of these religions have captured the
souls of man and brought them under this narrow control.

"Now Baha'u'llah has come and given freedom to these captive souls
and released them from their bondage."[31]

We talked of our walk behind Him--in His Footsteps--over the stones
and thorns. I quoted: "My sheep shall hear My voice and there shall
be one fold and one Shepherd." Then X referred to His serving the
little

children. "Suffer the children to come unto Me."[32] I said it was
a symbol of His serving us, who are His little children.

"They are My sons. You are My daughters, My descendants by the
Spirit, which is the nearest relationship. This day you are
spiritually free." Then He dismissed us, saying, "Go and rest."

As we were leaving the room I told Him it was my mother's birthday.

"God will bless her. God will bless her," He said. "I have a
message for your mother. I will give it to you tomorrow."

Alas for the sin of disobedience! He had said "Go and rest." But
we were so anxious to write down His words while they were fresh
in our minds that we stayed in the dining room until late,
and--shameful to confess after our day in Heaven!--began to argue
about the New York Assembly: as to whether or not it was united!
Mr Kinney declared that it was. I said it was not. I even went so
far as to mention the breeder of the discord, to condemn her
destructive work!

But when X and I crept off to the room we were temporarily
occupying--crept through the black, vaulted halls and rooms, over
the old stone floors, to the rear wing of the house--a feeling of
guilt such as I could hardly bear consumed me.

Next morning when I met our Lord outside the dining room door, in
the sunny little court I so love because it is associated with His
footsteps, with the benediction of His Presence, looking with eyes
that ... forgave? ... no, that understood ... deep, deep into my
eyes, He put out His hand and took mine in a clasp of love.

On the night of 3 July, when I was on the housetop with Munavvar
Khanum: a little miracle! One of countless miracles I experienced
while in the Palace of the Divine Magician.

That housetop--roof of the House of the Lord--surely the place for
the revelation of mysteries! I find I can scarcely speak of it. Yet
I long to make a picture of it. To me it represents the summit of
my existence.

When we first came to 'Akka, every night we would all go up to the
housetop to walk or sit in the moonlight, Tuba and Munavvar Khanum,
Edna Ballora, Carrie, Alice, X, Miss Gamblin the governess, and
myself. Later this changed and I went up alone with Munavvar. On
the stones of the roof was spread a Persian rug and on this we
would lie together, Munavvar and I, and under the midnight sky,
talk of deep things till our Lord appeared.

And indeed on that roof He was an Apparition. I can see Him now,
pacing up and down, up and down, with that swift, free tread which
is somehow like floating, His white garments blowing about Him in
long, sweeping lines. His background: millions of stars.

On the night of that third of July, Munavvar and I were alone,
sitting on a parapet, looking out beyond the strong double sea wall
to the sea; to our right, in the moonlight, the dome and minaret
of the mosque and a tall palm tree; to the left, the garden of the
Master; behind us, the grim, square barracks, first prison in 'Akka
of the Blessed Perfection and His Family.

"I have such a funny little message for our Lord from my mother,"
I said. "I don't know how I shall ever give it to Him!"

"I wonder," Munavvar laughed, "if it is like the message of the
mother of Laura Barney!"

"I shouldn't be surprised! It is about my art. She wants me to give
up teaching in the Cause--my precious little mother!--and devote
all my time to my art."

"Well, isn't that funny!" said Munavvar, "That is just what our
Lord was saying to me yesterday. He said He had a message for your
mother. That she did not understand your giving up everything for
the Cause, neglecting your art to devote yourself to the Cause.
Europeans, He said, did not understand these things. He was going
to speak to you about it."[33]

5 July 1909

Early morning tea

Our Lord to X, who was to leave that morning: "This is the third
time you have been here. It has been a great pleasure for you to
have been with your friends each time. Now a long trip is before
you. If throughout this trip you are always sincere in your
intentions you will enjoy it very much. This ought to be a
spiritual and not a physical journey. You must always do your best
to behave spiritually, not physically, so that everyone who meets
you will know that your intention is to do good to mankind and your
aim to serve the world of humanity.

Whatever you do, let the people know you are doing it for good, not
only to earn you own living. By doing thus you will be able to
serve every city to which you go. Now associate with good people.
You must try to associate with those who will do you good and who
will be the cause of your being more awakened, and not with those
who will make you negligent of God. For example, if one goes into
a garden and associates with flowers, one will surely inhale the
beautiful fragrance, but if one goes to a place where there are
bad-scented plants, it is sure he will inhale an unpleasant odour.
In short, I mean that you will try to be with those who are
purified and sanctified souls. Man must always associate with those
from whom he can get light, or be with those to whom he can give
light. He must either receive or give instructions. Otherwise,
being with people without these two intentions, he is spending his
time for nothing, and, by so doing, he is neither gaining nor
causing others to gain.

"You must keep these words very well. This is the third time you
have come here. Fruits must be the results of these visits.
Patients go to a hospital. Some leave but slightly improved. Some
leave more ill than when they entered. And some leave entirely
cured. I hope you will be of those who are entirely cured. You must
be very thankful that you have come."

In His room fifteen minutes later

To X: "You have made your third visit here. Know that We have been
very kind to you and We love you very much here. It is rare that
believers come here three times. You must appreciate and be very
thankful for this. You must appreciate this great blessing and act
as is worthy of a spiritual daughter, so that when I hear news of
you I shall be happy.

"May God protect you under all circumstances."

5 July 1909

He sent for me. Taking off my shoes, I entered the beloved room and
sat in my place at His feet, on His left. My place. May I be there
forevermore in spirit! It was always to this place He beckoned me.
First I would kneel, then sit in the Oriental way. He would draw
me close, would gather my hand into His, would sometimes press my
head against His knee.

"I am going to give you a message to your mother today," He said
with His smile of love. "Now, give Me her message. Speak. Say. Do
not be afraid."

"She told me to give You her dearest love."

"Ah!" He smiled.

"And to tell You I was her dear, precious child ..."

"Ah, very good!" He pressed my hand, smiling.

"And to say ..."

"Speak. Go on."

"That she did not wish me to be a teacher in the Cause. She wished
me to devote my time to my art, which was a gift from heaven. That
I was not qualified to teach. That I was too sympathetic to enter
into peoples' lives to the extent I did. That I let people make
inroads into my home for the sake of what I thought my duty. That
she wanted me to change all this and become devoted to my art."

"Is there anything else?" He asked.

"No; I think not."

"Give your mother My best love. Tell her you are her

dear child; you are her daughter. But though you are her physical
child, you are My spiritual child, and I love you and you are
dearer to Me than you are to her, and I am kinder to you than she
is and I want your good more than she does and I think of you more
than she does.

"As to your art: It is one of the Teachings of Baha'u'llah that art
is identical with an act of worship. And you must go on with your
art and improve in it. And through this very Cause you will be able
to make great progress in your art, for you shall be helped from
Above.

"But as to your being a teacher: In a short time your mother will
be proud that you are a teacher. This is an eternal honour upon
your family. Lately I have seen that God is looking upon your
family with eyes of Providence. Though your mother does not realize
it now, in the future she shall know that this is a cause of
eternal honour to your family.

"You must do both. You must be a teacher and go on with your art.
And give some time to your mother.

"What do you think of these messages to your mother?"

"What do I think of the rays of the Sun that give Life?"

"I am glad to see so much love in your heart."

"How is it that the Lord of mankind has drawn to Himself such a
tiny atom, such a little piece of nothing?"

"My wish for you is that you make spiritual progress, more and
more."

When He spoke of my art, He pressed the palms of my hands. When he
spoke of my teaching, He pressed my head and shoulders.

To be so near, so near that great Dynamo of Love, to

have been lifted up out of the mass of God's needy creatures and
drawn to the Heart of the Divine Magnet--may my life blood flow in
gratitude!

5 July 1909

Luncheon

Our Lord: "There are two kinds of changes and alterations. One
causes descent and one ascent. The one which causes descent is not
good, but on the contrary. The other change, which causes ascent,
is acceptable.

"For example, a child from the time of being in the womb of its
mother until it grows to maturity, changes in many stations, and
this change is accepted and praiseworthy. For instance, 'Mr
MacNutt'" (smiling toward little Howard Kinney, whom He always
called "Mr MacNutt" after his godfather, Howard MacNutt, a very
dignified man who looks something like George Washington) "after
many years will grow up and pass through many changes and will get
moustaches and a beard and will be a man!

"Consider the bread. It changes and changes until it gives power
to the body--and then it becomes man. This change is acceptable,
because it replaces what has been eliminated from the body. The
mineral carbon changes in many stations until diamonds are produced
from it.

"But the change which is hated in all cases is, for example, as
follows: A man is faithful; he gives up his faith. A just man
becomes cruel. A seer, a clear-sighted man, becomes blind. Or: to
be alive and then to die; to be steadfast in the Covenant and, for
some idea, to become the enemy, like Khayru'llah.[34] At first he
was a very firm man and was in the utmost faith. Then he wavered.
Such a change is hated.

"Many firm souls had the greatest capacity and were like the wick
and fire. As soon as they came in contact with the fire they
received light. By a single meeting they were so improved and
converted that they were entirely changed. While others were for
a long time My companions, yet never changed. You find a man will
be wakened by a single call. Another is never quickened even if you
discharge a cannon! As soon as the ray of the sun shines through
crystal it will burn, but if the same ray fall on a stone, no
effect is produced."

When He spoke of Khayru'llah I looked at my Lord, startled and
anxious. Could He mean that I might prove weak? He smiled at
me--oh, with such sweetness. My fears vanished before that sun!

He called Mr Kinney's attention to the rice.

"Rice. Rice," He said in English, "very good." Then looking at me
and laughing: "She is smiling at My English!"

"I smile because Your voice makes me happier than anything in the
world."

Soon, sensing my wish to speak to Him, only for the sake of
speaking to Him: "Speak. Speak."

But I had really nothing to say! I brought forth this: "Even this
physical food is the best in the world."

"That is because of your intense love. A poison given by a friend
is like honey. A Persian poet says: 'The poison which comes from
Thee to me is my antidote. A wound from Thee is remedy.' Certainly
these physical dishes are tasteful to you because you have the
greatest love."

I supplicated that He might give me poison and wound me in His
Cause, that I might be found worthy of this.

"I will. When afflictions and bitter conditions taste sweet to man,
this shows that he is favoured in the sight of God."

Mr Kinney said: "I am not eating now, but my Master is feeding me."

Our Lord: "I, Myself, am the Food."

As He spoke His head was bowed, His hands upturned, like cups, in
His lap. He sat, the embodiment of Divine humility. A great Mystery
flooded the room, and a tremendous Power.

"How like Jesus that sounds!" whispered Mr Kinney.

"Jesus," said our Lord, His head still bowed, "was the Bread that
came down from Heaven, but I am the Food prepared by the Blessed
Beauty, Baha'u'llah."

After a moment of dazzling silence, little Sandy said, "Why are you
crying, mother?"

I could not cry. I seemed to be translated into the Spiritual
Kingdom.

In few moments the Master turned to me and smiled. "Eat. Eat,
Juliet."

Because He had told me to eat, I felt that I must. I did so;
finished the food on my plate to the last morsel, though I could
scarcely swallow it. For the time, I was of the Heavenly Kingdom,
made of other elements. The physical food was like dust and ashes
in my mouth. Coarse grained, too, it seemed.

Later I understood what He had really meant by "Eat, Juliet." He
had invited me to partake of the Food prepared by the Blessed
Beauty.

In the large tea room

5 July 1909, 5 p.m. Afternoon tea.

Our Lord: "We ought to pray for Miss X, that she may become just
as God wishes her to be. If she be so, it will be very good,
because God always loves those who repent and are sorry for what
they have done. Such people are ashamed before God and become very
humble.

"Once a Pharisee and a Publican entered the Temple to pray. The
Pharisee said: 'Thank God I am not as other men.' The other said:
'God have mercy upon me, a sinner!' Christ said of these two: 'The
Pharisee is not acceptable in the Kingdom of God, but the other is
acceptable, because the Pharisee is trusting in his own action, but
the other is depending upon the forgiveness of God.'[35]

"But the only thing is this: One should remain firm in his
repentance. I will pray for her."

In His room

6 July 1909. Morning.

He sent for me, called me into His room this morning. Taking my
hands in His Life-giving hands. He asked me those first dear
questions: "Are you happy, Juliet?"

"So happy!"

"Are you well?"

"Thou knowest, my Lord."

He told me He was pleased with me. Then He asked me for the verbal
messages. He forgets nothing.

I gave Him dear Sylvia Gannett's message.

"She is such a beautiful spirit," I said. "She is a peacemaker. She
never criticizes anyone"

"It is a very good quality that she does not talk about others'
faults, for many troubles are caused by speaking against one
another. Because to talk badly behind the people is very bad."

I spoke of Herbert Rich and received a wonderful private message
for him.

To Miss Colt (who had sent the humblest of supplications): "Give
My kindest love to Miss Colt and say: You are worthy of everything.
Tell her that if she were not a worthy soul she would not have been
blessed with entering this Cause and she could not be able to
follow the Word of God. She was not unable to hear the Words of the
Kingdom. I will pray for her."

"What do you think of all these messages? I give them to you
because of the love in your heart."

I spoke of May Maxwell and Mariam Haney and said they were
beautiful.

"You are all beautiful," He replied. "And Mrs True?" He then asked.

"I don't know Mrs True, except through letters."

"I love Mrs True very much."

I spoke of Mr MacNutt and Mr Harris, and also mentioned Mr Hoar.
"They have borne so beautifully," I said, "their ordeals of the
past winter."[36]

He was silent for a moment, then asked: "Cannot you unite these two
factions?"

"O my Lord!" I gasped. "I! I have longed for years to see them
united."

"I know. That is why I love you so. You can do it because you have
love."

"If it is Thy command, I can do it, for Thou wilt help me. I have
not been able in the past because I had not enough love and was not
patient enough with those who see less clearly than others." (I
meant those who belittled His station, comparing Him with the
apostle Peter.)

"You must become more patient. It would be well if some others
would help you. For instance, Lua Getsinger, Miss Barney, Mrs
Brittingham, Mrs Maxwell, also Mrs Kinney, and anyone else you
think would promote harmony. If you could have feasts and meetings
in your houses and bring together the chief speakers in the utmost
love; and if, when you have the opportunity, you would speak to
them on the importance of unity, it would be very well. You will
be assisted in this."

"Why is it the Lord of mankind has been so bountiful to this atom?"

"If you all could know how I love you, you would fly away with
joy!"

"Think of Me often," He said. "Think of the times you have spent
here. I hope you will become the daughter of the Kingdom; that you
will become the essence of purity and very heavenly; that you will
become enlightened by the light of the Love of God and the cause
of the enlightenment of other maidservants. Is there anything
else?"

"There are three little things in my heart, my Lord."

"What are they?"

"I have a little godchild named for me, who was born under very
unfortunate circumstances."

"I will pray for her that she will be blessed both in this world
and in the spiritual world." The love and the understanding beaming
from His face set my heart forever at rest for the little Juliet.

"My brother?"

His smile became brilliant. "Your brother!" (in His ringing
English). Every one of His words in English burns into your soul.
Oh, if I only knew Persian! "Well, what is it for your brother?
Speak!"

"My Lord, he is like a beautiful rose bud: not yet opened."

Looking at me with divine loving kindness, He said: "I hope this
bud will become a beautiful full-blown rose and exhale the sweetest
fragrance. What else?"

"My Lord," I said, "I pray that Percy Grant may become a believer."

He pressed my hand two or three times and laughed, and smiled down
at me.

"Do you want this very much?"

"Oh my Lord, yes! So much!"

"I will pray for this. I will pray for this. But," and He smiled
again, indulgently, "you too must make an effort. You must help
him. I will pray for him."

Then He dismissed me. Kissing the hem of His garment, I left Him.

6 July 1909

Luncheon

Our Lord: "Afflictions and troubles are due to the state of not
being content with what God has ordained for one. If one submits
himself to God, he is always happy. A man asked another: 'In what
station are you?' The other answered: 'In the utmost happiness.'
'Where does this happiness come from?' 'Because all existing things
move according to my wish. I do not find anything contrary to my
desire. Therefore I have no sorrow. There is no doubt that all the
beings move by the Will of God, and I have given up my own will,
desiring the Will of God. Thus my will became the Will of God, for
there is nothing of myself. All are moving by His Will, yet they
are moving by my own will. In this case, I am very happy.'

"When man surrenders himself, everything will move according to his
wish."

__________

"Today I have answered the questions of all. Now you are left, Mr
Kinney!"

Mr Kinney: "There is only one question in my soul. How can I love
you more?"

Our Lord: "I will answer you later."

Mr Kinney: "The Board of Council[37] has met for three years past
in my studio and I am very proud of it."

Our Lord: "It is indeed worthy to be proud of. I hope your home may
always be the place of the gatherings; that the beloved of God may
always come together there, be engaged in commemoration of God,
have heavenly talks and speak through the confirmation of the Holy
Spirit. Your home will be one of the heavenly constellations,
Insha'llah, and the stars will gather there."

Mr Kinney: "What could I ask for more?"

Our Lord: "There is nothing superior to this."

6 July 1909

Dinner

Our Lord (through an interpreter): "The spiritual food is the
principal food, whereas the physical food is not so important. The
effect of the spiritual food is eternal. Through the material food
the body exists, but through the spiritual food the spirit will be
nourished. The material food, that is, the food for the body, is
simply water and bread, but the food for the intellect is knowledge
and the food for the spirit is the significances of the Heavenly
Words and the bounties of the Holy Spirit.

"If there were no love, nothing would be pleasing. Many come here
and eat, but they do not appreciate it."

The Master had written a Tablet to the believers in Tihran that
they should organize a meeting in which Baha'i women will teach and
train others to teach the Cause. Now they have written the news to
the Master that they have arranged this meeting and nineteen girls
and women attend. This meeting will advance directly, and will be
the cause of developing the girls in every way.

In our Lord's room

7 July 1909. Morning.

While Munavvar Khanum, Carrie, Alice, and I were in the room of our
Lord this morning, suddenly smiling at me, He said: "Do you think
your mother will like My message to her?"

"Her heart is so pure she must love it, Lord." My hand was in His.

"She will like that part about your art," He said, with His witty
smile.

"She said you would straighten out my life."

"Say to her: I have two arts: one physical, the other spiritual.
The physical one is that I draw the images of men. My spiritual art
is that I draw the images of the angels, and I hope that at last
I shall be able to draw pictures of the Perfections of God. My
physical art will at last end, but my spiritual art is everlasting.
My physical art can be done by many, but my spiritual art is not
the work of everyone. My physical art makes me dear to men, but my
spiritual art makes me dear to God. Therefore I work to perfect
both of them."

"Thou hast straightened out my life!"

With his smile of light He said: "I am the Heavenly Artist.
Although I am sitting here, my pen is working in every part of the
world, over the pages of the hearts."

7 July 1909

At luncheon

At this meal I was sitting beside Him.

Our Lord (through an interpreter): "The Master's love for you is
like an ocean and your love is like a drop. The distress and
calamities which the Master has endured for your sake for many
years, you could not endure for one day. And now, should anyone
offer Him the entire existent world in exchange for one of you, He
would not accept it. This means that one of you is dearer to Him
than the whole world. If a thousand swords be used on the Master's
neck, or against Him, He accepts that, but would not be content
that one hair of your head should be taken away.

"About two years ago some spies came from Constantinople and it
was a terrible day for the Master. He sent all the believers from
'Akka that none should be harmed but Himself. He sent them all away
that no one should stay in 'Akka except Himself--that if there were
any kind of calamity, it should be for Him alone.[38]

"You must realize by this expression how much He loves the
believers."

The Master groaned, and left the table.

__________

Every afternoon Tuba and Munavvar Khanum, Carrie and Alice and I
had tea in the room of our Lord. On this seventh of July we had a
most heavenly talk. Returning to my room with a yearning heart,
breaking under His Love, and with a devastating sense of my own
unworthiness, I wrote Him a supplication. I told Him my heart was
paralyzed by His bounties and it killed me to think that this
heart, receiving so much, realized so little. I begged Him to open
it wider and wider to the rays of His sacred Love.

Scarcely had I finished this pitiful little plea when I saw Him
standing at my door. That Holy Figure in white in the sunlit court!
I gave Him my supplication. He took it and, calling Munavvar
Khanum, beckoned us both to follow Him to His room. Then He asked
Munavvar to translate it. When she had done so, He simply said,
"Khayli khub," (Very well) and dismissed me.

Later in the afternoon, the Master struck me the first blow! The
beginning of the shattering of my earthly hopes. After this, He
took from the inside pocket of His long, flowing cloak my
supplication. Unfolding the paper and looking at me with grave
sweetness, he

pointed to the last paragraph, "May my heart open wider and wider
to the rays of Thy sacred Love." He then folded it again and put
it back in His breast-pocket.

Still later in the afternoon

"My daughter! My dear! My soul! My spirit!"

"Lord, anything You send me I will bear."

"Yes. Yes."

I was on my knees. I looked up to see the Christ-Face yearning over
me, His hands raised in blessing above my head. I shall never
forget that Face. It was lifted as though in prayer, His eyes
closed, His lips apart.

Then He held my head against His heart, and I heard the Heart of
'Abdu'l-Baha beat.

I went to my room. Standing, facing His room, I reached out my arms
and my heart cried: I love You. But I made no sound. Almost
instantly He appeared at my door. I knelt in the doorway. "I love
You; I love You," I said. He looked at me with unearthly luminous
eyes, then turned away. Once more I held out my arms. He looked
back.

The night of the seventh of July we all sat on the roof. He was in
His little room on the roof. He sent out His cloak to put around
Carrie, who felt cold, and she shared it with me. My tears fell on
His cloak. I had realized this: "With His stripes are we
healed."[39]

7 July 1909, 9 p.m.

At dinner

Our Lord: "Since the day you arrived you have daily progressed and
you have almost changed.

"Some souls come here and return unaltered. It is precisely like
one who comes to a fountain and, not being thirsty, returns exactly
as he came. Or, like a blind man who goes into a rose garden: he
perceives not, and, being questioned as to what he has seen in the
rose garden, answers, 'Nothing.'

"But some souls who come here are resuscitated. They come dead;
they return alive. They come frail or ill in body; they return
healed. They come athirst; they return satisfied. They come
sorrowing; they return joyous. They come deprived; they return
having partaken of a share. They come athirst; they return
satisfied!

"These souls have in reality done justice to their visit. Praise
be to God, you are of these souls and you must be exceedingly
happy.

"If a cow should go to a prosperous town, a city full of bounties
and divine blessings, and should be asked as to what it had found
in this town, it would say, 'Nothing but cucumber peels and melon
rinds.' But if a nightingale should fly to a rose garden, when it
returns the reply would be, 'Verily, I have scented delicious
fragrances, seen most beautiful flowers, most delightful verdure,
drunk most refreshing water from gushing fountains; and I have
found new life!' Now the reply of a beetle would be, 'All you have
heard concerning the rose garden is false. There is neither a
delightful fragrance nor beauty of verdure, nor is it joyous. In
fact, when I entered it, I was displeased. All you have heard is
false. Had I not escaped, I should have died!'"

8 July 1909

In the morning of 8 July, the Master rushed with tremendous energy
into my room and placed me with His two hands on the divan, then,
going down to the garden and into a little house below my window,
He dictated Tablets all morning, every now and then coming to the
window, standing in the sunlight and looking up at me. Never shall
I forget the Face of my King at the window. Just before He left the
house in the garden, once more He looked up. I was faithful at my
post; in fact, I had not dared even to move.

In His room

Afternoon, 7 July 1909

Munavvar, Carrie, Alice, Juliet

"All this trouble and hardship is just for this end: that you may
love one another as you should, so that you may be perfectly
united."

To Carrie Kinney: "Let Me give you the good tidings that your
family and your children will be greatly helped; and you must be
very happy for this. I love your 'Mr MacNutt' very much. It is good
that you have two Mr MacNutts! Others have one Mr MacNutt, but you
have two! Of course you love Mr MacNutt, because he has been the
cause of your spiritual life. The physical father is the cause of
the material life, but Mr MacNutt was the cause of your spiritual
life. Therefore you owe him much."

8 July 1909

At Luncheon

The Master spoke of the many letters He had answered that morning
and of the packages still unopened. Mr Kinney said: "I will write
Your letters for You!"

Our Lord: "Very good; very good. Write a letter and answer it
yourself. Look into your heart and see the answer. The answer is
what is written on the tablet of your heart. That which is written
upon paper is subject to corruption and various accidents, such as
consumption by fire and moth, but that which is inscribed on the
tablet of the heart is imperishable and everlasting. A day will
come when all My communications upon paper--all My writing--will
be effaced. But that which I have inscribed upon the hearts will
not be effaced. There is no end to it. For I write the Word of the
Love of God upon the hearts, and the Word of God is eternal."

The Master said He was exceedingly happy because of Mr Kinney's
presence at the table (after a short illness), "for we are all
assembled together."

"Just consider what the Bounty of Abha has achieved! Just observe
in what a condition we are! Imagine not that if you were to
sacrifice all upon earth, you could produce this attitude."

Little Howard (aged four) from his high chair: "Won't the Master
come to New York?"

Our Lord: "Perhaps you do not know that I am always there with you,
for though My body is absent, My heart is there; My Spirit is
there."

Mr Kinney (to the interpreter): "Tell the Master He will always be
an honoured Guest."

Our Lord: "I am the Host, not a guest. For to be a guest is to be
there temporarily, whereas the Host stays forever."

__________

One day at lunch a huge dish of macaroni was put on the table. The
Master, laughing, rose from His seat, took the platter in His own
hands, brought it to little Howie's high chair and served him a
very big helping. Then He told us that "Mr MacNutt" had come to His
door that morning, had taken off his shoes and left them on the
door step, then had run to Him, the Master, where He was sitting
by the window, thrown his arms around the Master's neck and
whispered in His ear: "My Lord, can't we have macaroni for lunch?"

"He is never allowed it at home," laughed Carrie.

In the Master's room

8 July 1909

In the early afternoon He called us all into His room. Beckoning
me to sit in my accustomed place and taking my hand in His, He
began: "You are fortunate that during these few days I have not
been very busy, for to some others it happened I had less time to
give them.

"The desire of My heart is that each of you, when you return to
America, will be just like a torch flaming with the Love of God,
and that your speech will be wonderfully loosened, so that when you
enter the meetings, you will enter them with full eloquence and
with perfect courage. I kiss the mouth of Sandy so that he may have
wonderful speech, especially for this purpose."

He then dictated messages to various believers. On our expressing
regret at burdening Him with so many, He said: "Everything that is
a sign of your love toward one another, though it take my time, yet
it makes me happy. And if you will realize how much I love you all,
you will know that even were I occupied day and night with your
affairs, I would never tire. For My Love is not a physical one to
make Me tired. My Love is purely spiritual and divine. Therefore
I am never tired."

Through Carrie to Mrs Gibbons:[40] "You must always look forward
to My will and desire. My will and desire are that you should
honour and respect all humankind, especially the believers. Never
try to be the cause of hurting anyone's feelings. On the contrary,
make every effort to become the happiness of hearts. There is no
greater sin than the breaking of hearts and there is no greater
action than to be the cause of the happiness of hearts. If you want
My happiness, try to be kind to Dr Fischer,"[41] (as I caught my
breath in wonder at His knowledge, He smiled down at me) "and do
something that no ill-feeling may exist any more between you."

Carrie asked for a message for Mrs MacNutt, "if it is not too
much."

(To us:) "I love you all so much that the more I mention you the
happier I become. Say to Mrs MacNutt: Though you stayed in 'Akka
a short time, it is as though you had stayed one year, for in that
short time the instructions and teachings of God were revealed to
you and you have accepted them with a pure heart, for you had the
capacity for receiving the divine bounties. Therefore, in a short
time you have attained to a new spirit. I ask God that you make
progress day by day and that you may have a greater portion of the
bounties of Baha'u'llah."

Through Alice to Robert Rich: "Give My love to him and say: Mrs
Beede mentioned you here and said good things about you. I know you
have gone through sufferings in your life, but the sufferings and
troubles in this world are the cause of awakening one. Therefore,
you must be thankful for what sufferings you have and give thanks
to God that you have not been shaken by your tests. For the tests
are very great and sometimes will be the cause of one's being quite
neglectful. But, thanks be to God, you have faced them firmly. I
will pray for you, so you may obtain the desire of your heart."

Through me to Thorton Chase: "Give My greetings to Mr Chase and
say: Miss Juliet mentioned you here with love and with a face full
of light. And she mentioned your kindness to her. I am pleased with
you. And for your endeavour and zeal in serving the Kingdom of God
I am very happy. And I hope you will yourself become the embodiment
of the instructions of Baha'u'llah, so that each one who sees you
and knows your actions will know that the teachings of Baha'u'llah
are manifesting through you."

To Mr Windust[42] through me: "Give Mr Windust My kindest love and
say: Though physically I have not met you, in reality I have seen
you often. Why? Because in Spirit and heart I am always with you.
I am inseparable from you. And I know your desire is My
good-pleasure. Therefore I am pleased with you."

Through me to Annie Boylan: "Your message was delivered and the
good tidings of the union and harmony among the believers of New
York caused a happiness in My heart. For each one in this world has
a desire. But My desire is the realization of the perfect love in
the world of humanity. The mention and thought of all the believers
day and night, must be love, union, and brotherhood. This union
will be the cause of their progress in all conditions."

Through Alice to Mason Remey: "Give My greatest love to Mr Remey
and say: You are very dear to me. You are so dear that I think of
you day and night. You are My real son. Therefore I have an idea
for you. I hope it may come to pass."

He turned to me and, smiling, said: "Do you love Mr Remey?"

It crucified me, but I answered, "Yes." Again the Master smiled.

Later, while I dwelt in anguish on the significance of His
words--while the pencil with which I was taking them down slipped
from my hand--He turned to me smiling again and, pointing to my
notebook, said: "Write; write!"

Soon He dismissed us.

__________

Near sunset we went to the Holy Tomb.

Just before we went He came to our room--Alice's and mine--and,
seating Himself on the couch, while as usual I sat at His feet, He
said: "Now I am sending you to the Tomb, and you should ask there
all you wish and desire. And I will pray also, here, for what you
pray. And there you will pray for everything you wish."

In that unutterably holy place I prayed for unity in New York. I
prayed to be strengthened to fulfil His Will. I implored for
strength to meet my great tests. I prayed for my father, mother,
and brother and for every friend I could think of. Then I took from
my heart the love of my life and gave it into the hand of
Baha'u'llah. I asked but one thing: that this once-beloved of my
heart might know His Beauty and might serve His Threshold.

8 July 1909

Dinner, 9 p.m.

Our Lord, smiling: "Are you happy owing to your visit to the Tomb?
Mrs B. [Beede]?

Alice, with a face all shadows and tragedy: "You must feel that I
never was so happy."

Our Lord: "Although our assembly tonight numbers only ten
outwardly, in reality it is representative of all the beloved of
God. Why? Because it pictures the Baha'i community. The seed, no
matter how small, in the estimation of the perceptive mind, is a
veritable tree. The mind images the tree and the tree is revealed
from the seed. Likewise, when I see you it is as though I were
seeing all the beloved of God. The Teachings I give to you are the
Teachings I would give to all the beloved of God.

"Today when you visited the Holy Tomb, I during that very time
directed My attention to the Supreme Concourse of the Kingdom of
Abha and supplicated confirmations in your favour.

"Praise be to God, your hearts are overflowing with the Love of God
and you have no great attachment to this world. The thing which is
necessary for you now is discourse. It is My hope that you will
attain an eloquent discourse, for I have loved you exceedingly.
Consequently I anticipate an eloquent, expressive, and excellent
discourse on your part after your arrival in America. Rest assured
in the fact that the breaths of the Holy Spirit will

aid you, provided no doubts obtain in your hearts. Is not this so,
Juliet? Is not this so, Mrs B.?"

He helped each of us from His plate. To me He gave His bread. I was
sitting beside Him.

"You will remember these nights very often. These nights are rare.
They are not obtained always.

"I hope the party that has come, Mr and Mrs Kinney, Mrs B., and
Juliet, will be real Baha'is and that your deeds and actions will
manifest this when you return to New York. I have given you so many
blessings. I hope you will be able to speak fluently and with great
power in the meetings and share with the rest of the friends what
you have received here."

That night (8 July) I went to the housetop alone with Munavvar
Khanum.

"Dear," I said, "do you remember my supplication that Percy Grant
might become a believer? I have had only one strong love in my
life: for him. We both knew it the moment we met. Then a blow came,
and I refused to see him any more. I even left New York for a time
because, really providentially, only a day or two after that blow,
I was called to Washington to paint a portrait. And in Washington,
Munavvar, Ahmad showed me a Tablet just arrived from the Master to
a friend of mine, who had mentioned Percy Grant in one of her
supplications--merely mentioned his name in a prayer for him--a
Tablet in which was a message to him and to myself:

'Say to Percy Grant and Juliet Thompson: O ye intelligent ones,
there is no rest or tranquillity in this world. There is no
composure of mind. The world is in need of the Heavenly
Glad-Tidings. Therefore, turn ye to the Kingdom of Abha and seek
after spiritual attraction, for life without this is death and this
evanescent world like the mirage in the desert.'

__________

"This is as well as I can remember it. And ever since then this
spiritual attraction has been growing. But today I took this love
out of my heart and returned it to God. And now I am ready to do
the Master's Will."

"Why did you do this, dear?"

"Because I believed it to the be the Master's Will."

"What made you think that?"

"Don't you know?"

"Yes, dear, I think I do. Something He said this afternoon?"

"Yes, dear."

"Our Lord has asked me to speak about this to you, Juliet. He seems
to wish it very much. He knows this other man too, but He thinks
Mr Remey would be better. But He also wishes to know your own
feelings."

"He knows my own feelings, Munavvar darling. There is no flinching
in me that He does not know. But I have prayed to make any
sacrifice and I could have no greater opportunity. I could make no
greater sacrifice than in marrying a man I did not love. But for
the Master's sake I would do it joyfully."

"But, dear, He would not wish you to go against your inner
feelings. Tell me about it."

"Perhaps I am too much attracted by people of brilliant intellect.
And this man I love has such a powerful one! But how can I think
of my own preferences when the Master wishes something else for
me?"

Suddenly our Lord appeared on the housetop. Walking

up and down like a king, He began to talk to us. I listened in
breathless wonder. Most of what He said has escaped me. I can only
write fragments.

He told me He wished me to have a great power of discourse. He
spoke of love. He said I had a great capacity for love, that this
was the promising sign in me. "Qurratu'l-'Ayn,"[43] He said, "had
nothing but her love. This was her power."

I spoke of how deeply I felt my unworthiness.

"Capacity attracts," He answered. "The greater your capacity, the
more you will be filled. When the child is hungry and cries for
milk, the milk of the mother begins to flow rapidly."

I could scarcely speak after all He said. When His bounties are
pouring upon me I always feel paralyzed. All my senses are numb,
dead. It kills me to be so, beneath the outpourings of His
generosity. To be in the Presence of the Lord and not aglow! I am
filled with shame and the sense of my utter unworthiness. I
murmured to Munavvar Khanum: "Say to our Lord for me: What matters
the physical life now? I can do nothing for Him, for Whom I want
to do everything, but follow His commands and wishes to the
minutest detail."

He then came and sat on the rug beside us and began to speak of
Mason Remey. Oh, to picture Him as He was then--no longer the Lord,
the King, but the tender Father--a something eager (if I may use
the word) in His manner and tone.

He told me He loved Mason Remey so much and He loved me so much
that He wished us to marry. That was the meaning of His message to
Mason. He said it would be a perfect union and good for the Cause.
Then He asked me how I felt about it.

I answered: "I will gladly fulfil Thy wish."

"But what are your inner feelings?"

"Lord, Thou knowest my inner feelings."

"You love this other man? You love?"

"It is secondary now. My only desire is to fulfil Thy Will. Thou
knowest best. My only desire is to give all I have for Thee--to
give my dearest. I can do this now. This is my opportunity."

"But, my daughter, My wish is for your happiness. You must be frank
with Me about it. The inner feelings cannot be forced. In speaking
with you just now I was giving you spiritual commands. This is
different; this is material, and, in regard to it, I am not
commanding but suggesting. This union with Mr Remey is merely an
idea, a suggestion of Mine."

"Thy suggestions and ideas come from the Infinite Wisdom."

"But--understand Me--I wish your happiness."

"I should rather follow Thy wish. I should be happier following Thy
wish than in marrying the man I love."

"Well, is it possible for you to love Mr Remey as you do this other
man?"

"Is it possible, Lord?"

"If it is possible to love Mr Remey equally well, for him to take
the place of the other, then I should be glad." He paused a moment.
"But your marrying the other is very good, if you can make him a
believer. And you must pray for it. If you see that he has an
inclination to become a believer, even before he does so, you can

marry him. If you can lead him to the Cause this is very, very
good. Am I not a kind Father?" He asked.

I spoke brokenly of His Love.

"I am the Essence of Love."

I remember His saying later: "Appreciate this night. Many a soul,
both now and throughout the ages, would give their lives for five
moments of such a night on this roof with Me--and with Munavvar
Khanum."

During the tender talk that followed, I asked: "May I come here
again?"

"Yes; yes!" He replied. "You have permission to come whenever you
find you can do so."

Ah, "many a soul, both now and throughout the ages, would give
their lives for five moments of such a night on the roof with
Him--and with Munavvar Khanum."

9 July 1909

Morning

He called me to His little room. Tuba Khanum interpreted for me.
What He said to me I cannot tell--only a tiny part.

"You have stood a very great test. I love you dearly. Your tests
have been very, very great. And when they came you did not flinch"
(raising His hand with a strong gesture) "but stood firm and met
them bravely. And they were very great."

"My Lord, I have been grieving for not having met them more
perfectly."

Then followed what I cannot tell. Only my Lord, Tuba and myself,
and Beings in the Unseen World who live in the Presence of the
Master, know what He said to me then. I wept at His feet.

"What I have told you is because of this," He said, "this condition
of your heart."

"Be happy," He continued. "Think if you were at the feet of Christ
in His time, His hand covering yours."

"I am so unworthy. I am so dead. Quicken me into Life!"

"I will. Be at rest, and I will. I will widen you. I love your
love."

"Perhaps I feel so dead in order to realize that everything comes
from Thee, that without Thee I am indeed dead. Without Thee I can
do nothing."

At the end He said: "Go, and be My light in America."

Kissing the hem of His garment, I left Him.

A little later, still on the housetop, He pointed to the waning
moon. "The moon ... the stars ... the East ... no! I am the Sun of
the West!" He said.

"For us? Us Christians?"

"Yes. For you."

After an interval: "I am not worthy, Lord, that Thy Glory should
be revealed to me yet?"

"No."

"But some day?"

"Yes."

There was a flash from His eyes. For an instant they were like
brilliant stars before which the stars in heaven paled. Then He
veiled them with His lids. Two more flashes, and they became as
usual. Unworthy though He had found me, He, in His mercy and love,
gave me three glimpses of His Glory.

"My Spirit loves your spirit. I love your heart." He touched my
heart; and it leapt beneath His fingers.

"The strings of my heart vibrate," I said, "beneath the fingers of
the Divine Musician."

He touched it again; and again it was strangely stirred. "Ahh!" I
breathed.

"Why 'Ahh'?"

"This heart will sing for Thee forever!"

He covered my lips with His hand.

"Love," He said. For a moment he lifted His hand.

"Love," I repeated. His hand closed again on my lips.

"Love!" He said, lifting His hand.

"Love," I repeated. He made me repeat it many times.

He touched my eyes and my forehead.

"I am Thy new creation," I said. "Keep me unspotted from the
world." I had been kneeling at His feet. I raised my face and
looked up. That Face of Grandeur, the long grey hair blown about
it, under the stars!

"My Lord!"

"Yes!" with incredible majesty.

"My King!"

"Yes!"

"O Christ!"

There was no answer.

"Word of God!"

"Yes!"

"King of the Seen and the Unseen!"

"Yes!"

"Prince of Peace!"

"Ah. Peace ..." He seemed to sigh the word: from that housetop,
across the world. I shall never forget the heartbreak in the sigh.

Then, turning to me: "I am thy Father. Say: Thou art my Father."

"Thou art my Father."

"I am thy King. Say: Thou art my King."

"Thou art my King."

"I am thy Beloved."

"Thou art my Beloved!"

9 July 1909

Luncheon, 12:30

Our Lord: "How spiritual are our meetings! In the utmost love are
we set aglow! The hearts are all attracted to each other. It is
just like being one soul, one body. Such a meeting as this is
impossible and cannot be organized save through the Love of God.
There is no material interest whatsoever. There is no worldly
desire at all. In the utmost purity and holiness has the Force of
Divinity assembled us. All, with perfect sincerity, are directing
our attention to the Kingdom of Abha, and our greatest desire is
His good-pleasure.

"New pilgrims have arrived from Persia. Souls firm in the Covenant
have arrived. They have come in the utmost love. The Light of the
Love of God is radiant in their countenances.

"Yesterday Mr Kinney asked me concerning music and I promised I
would answer him today:

"Music is of the important arts. It has a great effect upon the
human spirit. Musical melodies are a certain something which prove
an accidental[44] upon ethereal vibrations. For voice is nothing
but the expression of vibrations, charged therewith, which affect
the nerves of the ear. Musical melodies are therefore those
peculiar effects which are produced by vibrations. However, music
has the keenest effect upon spirits. Although it is a material
affair, its tremendous effect is spiritual and its greatest
attachment is to the realm of the spirit.

"If a person desires to deliver a discourse, it would prove more
effective after musical melodies. The ancient Greek philosophers,
as well as the Persian, were in the habit of delivering their
discourses in the following manner: First, there would be musical
melodies, and when the audience had been influenced to a certain
extent thereby, they would leave their instruments and begin their
discourse.

"Among the most ancient musicians of Persia was one named Barbad.
When a great question was asked at the court of the king and the
ministers failed in persuading the king, the matter would be
referred to Barbad. Whereupon Barbad would go with his instrument
to the court and would play the most appropriate and touching
music: and the end would at once be gained. Because the king would
immediately be affected by the musical melodies. Certain feelings
of generosity would swell in his heart, and he would give way.

"You may try this. If you have a great desire for something, if you
wish earnestly to attain your end, try to attain it in a musical
audience. But there are people who are like stones, and music
cannot affect a stone.

"Now let us go back to the original subject: Music is an important
means for the education and development of humanity. But the main
cause for the development of humanity is the Teaching of God.

"Music is like this glass which is perfectly pure and polished. It
is precisely like this clear chalice before us. And the Teachings
and Utterances of God are like the water. When the chalice is in
the utmost state of purity, absolutely clear and polished, and the
water is perfectly fresh, then it will confer life. Wherefore, the
Teachings of God, whether they be Utterances in the form of
homilies, or prayers and communes, when they are melodiously
chanted will proved most impressive. It is for this reason that His
Holiness David sang the psalms with melody in the Holy of Holies
at Jerusalem.

"In this Cause the art of music is of paramount importance. The
Blessed Perfection, Baha'u'llah, when He first came to the barracks
often repeated this statement: If among His immediate followers
there were some who could play some musical instrument, for
instance the flute or the harp, or who could sing, it would have
charmed everyone.

"In short, musical melodies play an important role in the outward
and inward qualities of man, for music is the inspirer and motive
power of both the material and the spiritual susceptibilities. What
a motive power it is in feelings of love! When man is attracted to
the Love of God, music will have a great effect upon him."

The Master turned to the window and pointed to a ship on the sea.

"See: a ship!" He said to Alice, who was sitting beside Him at this
meal.

"If we build the Temple quickly," she asked, "and send a ship for
You, will you come to America?"

"I will come of My own volition to America if they build the
Mashriqu'l-Adhkar quickly. But," (sadly and very gently) "they will
not build it quickly."

I was sitting next to Edna Ballora. Taking her hand, I said to our
Lord: "May Edna help me with the meetings in my studio when we
return to New York?"

"Khayli khub. Khayli khub. You love Edna Ballora?" He asked, His
eyes--so holy, so shining--fixed on me.

"Oh yes, my Lord!"

"Very much?"

"Oh so much!" The love already in my heart for Edna was fanned to
an intense flame. It burned; it hurt me.

"Very, very much?"

The Master was still gazing at me, and now I could scarcely bear
that flame in me, in which my heart itself seemed to be melting
away. Tears rained down my cheeks.

"Edna," cried the Master, "behold your friend! It is possible for
fathers and mothers to weep when their children are in trouble, but
it is rare that they weep merely for love of their children, as
Juliet has wept for love of you."

Oh, Heavenly Artist! For one brief moment he had created in me the
Love of God; He had given me a foretaste of that
Love--other-dimensional, superhuman --which with my whole soul I
pray I may attain some day. For without this universal love how can
we hope to work for the Kingdom of God, the oneness of man on
earth?

And, in that mysterious moment, I understood that the universal
love is not "impersonal". I loved not only Edna's soul, but all of
her. I could have died for her.

9 July 1909

Dinner, 9 p.m.

Our Lord: "Tonight Mr Sprague[45] is going to speak to you, because
he has been to Persia and has spent a year in Tihran. Hence he
shall speak."

Mr Sprague: "It is impossible to speak when our Lord is here."

On being further pressed by our Lord, he referred to a meeting
where a Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim were present and, remaining
for the night, shared the same bed.

Our Lord: "Consider what the power of the Covenant has done! It was
an impossibility for a Zoroastrian to unite with a Sid and a mulla
with a Jew. And for these to assemble with a Christian was an
absolute impossibility. But the power of the Covenant has even so
gathered them that they are accounted as one spirit. Although the
bodies are numerous, the spirit is one.

"About thirty or forty years ago, in the province of ... , the
Muslims assaulted the Jewish colony and began a wholesale
slaughter, and only those Jews who, narrowly escaping, could get
to the mosque to confess were saved. The rest were subjected to
wholesale murder. And those who apparently were converted are in
reality, up to the present time, Jews. But many became Baha'is.

"Mirza 'Azizu'llah Khan whom you met: his father was martyred, and
his brother at the age of twelve gave his life for the Cause."

At the table that night was a boy from India, brought to 'Akka by
Sydney Sprague, who was taking the child to his own school in
Turkey to educate him. The father of the boy had given his life for
Mr Sprague. It happened in this way: Mr Sprague was then in India,
teaching the Cause and, in his enthusiasm, he remained till too
late in the summer in Calcutta. A plague broke out and the people
died by hundreds. Every hospital was crowded, the doctors and
nurses were all busy. Even the Baha'is had their hands too full.
Mr Sprague came down with typhoid fever. One of the Baha'is wrote
to another in a nearby town, to a shopkeeper named Kay-Khusraw,
asking his help. Kay-Khusraw immediately closed his shop and made
his will. Then he said goodbye to his family--forever in this
mortal life--and went to Calcutta to nurse his American brother,
whom he had never seen. Under his tender care, Mr Sprague
recovered, but scarcely was he convalescent when the plague
overtook Kay-Khusraw and within a day or two he died.

Mr Sprague told me the whole story. He knew that he must pay a
visit to Kay-Khusraw's family, but he dreaded facing them, more
than anything, he told me, that he had ever had to do. But when he
entered their house, they greeted him with outstretched arms. "Do
not feel sad," they said. "It was right that Kay-Khusraw should
give his life for his brother. Besides, Mr Sprague, you are a great
teacher and Kay-Khusraw was a humble shopkeeper. He could never
have served the Cause as you can."

__________

A sweet picture of the Master: He had sent for us that afternoon
to meet Mr Sprague and the Persian believers and, not being ready,
I put on a dress I could slip into easily. As I passed the Master
standing in His door: "I am afraid I am not dressed well enough,"
I said.

He touched my arm, smiling with the utmost sweetness.

"The Persian believers do not look at the dress, My child. They
look at the heart."

10 July 1909

Morning

Our Lord has just called me into His room with Munavvar.

"I love you very dearly," He said. "That is the reason I am
speaking so freely to you. To others I do not speak so freely. This
is just for you.

"Do you know Miss __________? She came here and was full of love
and aglow. Then she returned and married and her love for the
Blessed Perfection grew cold. Now I want to tell you," (and He put
His arms around me and held me close, and never shall I forget
those protecting arms!) "I want to tell you not to marry this man
until you have made him a believer. Because afterward it would be
more difficult. First make him a believer. You can. Then he will
be a good husband to you and will make you very happy. And he will
be a good believer. I speak to you so freely because I love you so
much. To others I say: 'Do as you like.' But to you I am more
explicit and I say: Do not do this. You only see the beginning. I
see the end. But do your best to make him a believer. You can. He
will become one out of his love for you. He loves you now. The
first love is very strong. After you were married it might not be
so easy. Then he might influence you. I will pray for you and
assist you and you will do this. But do not yield. Do not marry
him, though it take years to make a believer."

Those strong arms of Love gathered me closer--my refuge, my
shelter, my eternal protection. I know that whatever may come in
the future I shall feel in the moment of test: those arms, those
great tender, tender arms. No one knows what such a clasp is save
those who have been in the arms of 'Abdu'l-Baha.

"It is because I love you so that I say this," He repeated. "When
you return," He continued, "say to him: If you will go yourself to
'Akka, you will see that which is beyond conception. If you go you
will find all your conceptions useless in comparison with the Real-

ity. If you go you will be given that for which you would not
exchange all the kingdoms of the world."

"Shall I tell him this from Thee?"

"It is wiser not to--yet," with that wonderful witty smile. "If you
see some softening you may."

"You know him?" I asked.

"I know everyone in the world."

"You love him?"

"Yes, I love him. As you are my daughter, I want him to be my son."

"Is he not the material martyrs are made of?"

"Make him so!" He smiled. "Am I not a kind Father, Juliet?"

"Thou art too kind. I am crushed beneath Thy love and generosity."

"You had a great test about this and you passed it well. Speak;
speak," He said. "Tell Me all you wish to tell Me."

I began to speak of Percy Grant and of his lifework, carried on in
the face of strong opposition and at the risk of his worldly
career.[46] But I stopped very soon, feeling that words were so
futile. My Lord knew all.

When I left Him I kissed the hem of His garment.

10 July 1909

How can such a pen as mine write of superhuman things?

On the morning of 10 July, our Lord Himself took us to the room
where are kept the pictures of the Bab and the Blessed Perfection,
Baha'u'llah.

The room is very long and bare. At the further end of it stand
three easels and on each easel a picture. We approached those
Sacred Pictures from afar. To the left, as we approached, was a
miniature of the Bab; to the right a miniature of the Blessed
Perfection and, in the centre, a photograph of the Blessed
Perfection.

The instant I saw that photograph I fell with my face to the
ground, trembling and sobbing. It was as though the Picture were
alive and Something had rushed from it and struck me a blow between
the eyes. I cannot explain it. The power and the majesty were
terrific.

Soon the Master touched me on the shoulder. (I had already risen
to my knees and was staring at the photograph.) He drew my
attention to the miniature of Baha'u'llah. "This is a painting.
This will interest you, Juliet."

But my eyes were fastened on the photograph. I could not remove
them, except for a brief moment, from that omnipotent Face.

Yet--dare I say it? I love the Face of 'Abdu'l-Baha more. When I
ventured to tell Munavvar this, she answered, "But if you could
have seen Baha'u'llah! That photograph is not good. If you could
have seen His eyes!"

(Footnote. Brumana. Riyad Effendi has just told me a wonderful
thing which explains this feeling of mine. He told it to me in
answer to my guilty question: "Why do I love the Face of the Master
more than the Face of Baha'u'llah?" In a hadith,[47] he said, there
is a marvellous prophecy: that in the Latter Days God would reveal
Himself as God; would come, announcing, "I am God." Then, when this
proved too strong for the hearts of the people, He would change His
Manifestation and appear once again in the Form of "The Servant",
that all men might draw nearer to Him.)[48]

__________

Once I said to our Lord: "In a dream one night I saw Thy Face. And
it was really Thy Face. I know now. And in my dream I thought: This
is a Beauty to follow, leaving everything behind. It is a Beauty
to die for."

He leaned forward and looked at me with great solemnity. "That was
a true vision," He said, "and you will see it again."

10 July 1909

Luncheon

Our Lord: "The Baha'i news from Persia is very good. I cannot tell
it to you--it is not permissible; but it could not be better. The
news of the country is bad, but that of the Cause is exceedingly
good.[49] This is glad-tidings to be given to you.

"Today you had a visit to the Blessed Bab and the Blessed
Perfection."

Mr Kinney: "I shall always see the Face of the Blessed Perfection."

Our Lord: "At the time of prayer one must hold in one's mind some
object. Then he must turn his face and direct his mind to this
picture. But whatever form is produced in the mind is imagination,
that is, one's own conception. There is no connection between it
and the Reality. Therefore people worship imagination. They think
of an imaginary God. That of which they think is not God. God can
never be comprehended. That which man thinks is comprehended by
man, but God is comprehensive. All that comes under comprehension
is outside God. The Reality of Divinity is holy, lofty, sacred
beyond comprehension. All nations worship their images of a god and
these imaginary gods are superstitious phantoms. Hence they are
worshipers of superstitions.

"Therefore the Objective Point of all is the Manifestation of God.
And whosoever directs his attention in prayer to that Focal Point
has directed his attention, verily, to God.

"At the time of His Holiness Jesus Christ the Jews forsook Him,
and would imagine a phantasmal god and would adore that!" (The
Master laughed, continuing to laugh heartily.) "On a certain
occasion the famous heroine of this Movement, Qurratu'l-'Ayn,
chanced to meet a devout Muslim who was praying and questioned him
thus: 'To whom art thou praying, may I ask?' 'I am praying to the
very Essence of Mercy and the Reality of Divinity.' And she,
smiling, said: 'Oh, away with your god! Away with him! Your god is
an imagination! Come, and I will show you the God of today! It is
the Bab! Your god is a phantom, while this is a certainty. Can the
Sea be contained in a little glass?'"

In reply to a question asked by Alice regarding the personality of
the Manifestation: "The Blessed Perfection does not mean His body.
This body is now interred in the Holy Tomb. When we say the Blessed
Perfection we mean the Reality, and the Reality of the Blessed
Perfection is living and everlasting.

"Just as in the time of Christ: the disciples were agitated when
they saw the body of Jesus crucified. Then Mary Magdalene came to
them and said: 'Why are you agitated?' 'Because,' they replied,
'Jesus has been crucified.' 'Oh,' she said, 'that was the body of
Jesus, but the Reality of Jesus is living and eternal. It is not
subject to corruption.' And now so it is with the Blessed
Perfection.

"When I pray I turn My thoughts and My face to the Blessed
Perfection."

10 July 1909

Afternoon

He sent for Alice and me to come to His room to have tea.

First He gave us a beautiful talk about devotion and love toward
each other. "If you show this love toward one another," He said,
"it is just as though you showed it toward Me." He spoke of the
time of Christ, how no one paid any attention to Him while He was
on earth; how He was even spit upon in the streets, yet now His
disciples, and also the women who followed Him, are greatly
glorified.

"In the time to come," He said, "queens will wish they had been the
maid of Juliet."

Then He sent Alice away to dress for a visit to the Ridvan,[50]
where, a little later, we were all going--but detained Munavvar and
me.

"Remember, Juliet," He said, "one hair of Mason Remey's head, or
any other believer's, is worth all the unbelievers in the world."

"Dear Lord," I replied, "I am ready at this moment to do what You
spoke of the other night."

"No, it is not for that I say so; you have passed that. But I want
you to remember that it is a fact. If all the kings and queens of
the world were to come and stand outside My window and offer Me
everything in exchange for you, I would say: 'I should rather keep
Juliet.' You must be like that. A believer at first is like a lamp,
then like a star, then like the moon. And in the Kingdom of God
like the sun. An unbeliever is first like a lamp; then he becomes
extinct! And that is the difference between them! But you will make
the man you love a believer.

"Only," He added, "wait till you do."

He went out of the room. Munavvar and I remained, sitting on His
bed, talking. Almost at once He returned to us.

"You must read Miss Barney's book[51] and Mirza Abu'l-Fadl's[52]
a great deal, Juliet. I want you to progress spiritually and to be
a real daughter of the Kingdom. I want you to be entirely severed
from the world."

Later, after our heavenly evening in the Ridvan, He came to the
door of my room, while I was talking with Munavvar Khanum. She told
Him what I had been saying, that I longed to stay forever and ever,
but knew that, even if I could, it would be selfish; but I felt
like a crying baby when I thought of going away.

"If you should stay forever," He laughed, "what would you do with
the one you left behind?"

"I forget many things in the Light of Thy Face! I am inconstant to
the world here!"

"Yes, if you should remain, you would forget many things."

On the morning of 10 July, a blessed experience which I had
forgotten to record. Our Lord called Carrie, Alice, and me
separately to His room and gave us the priceless privilege of
seeing Him dictate Tablets.

I sat on the divan, my eyes upon His white-robed figure--I could
scarcely raise them to His Face--as He paced up and down that small
room with His strong tread. Never had the room seemed so small;
never had He appeared so mighty! A lion in a cage? Ah no! That room
contain Him? Why? As I felt that great dominant Force, that Energy
of God, I knew that the earth itself could not contain Him. Nor yet
the universe. No! While the body, charged with a Power I have seen
in no human being, restless with the Force that so animated it,
strode up and down, up and down in that tiny room, pausing

sometimes before the window, below which the sea beat against the
double seawall, I knew that the Spirit was free as the Essence
itself, brooding over regions far distant, looking deep into hearts
at the uttermost ends of the earth, consoling their secret sorrows,
answering the whispers of far-off minds.

Often in that walk back and forth He would give me a long, grave
glance. Once He smiled at me.

At last He called Alice and Carrie back and, taking a seat Himself
on the divan while we gathered around Him on the floor--I in my
place on His left, at His feet--He said: "Letters shower as rain
on me. I write the answers and they are not finished!

"Many come that are difficult to read. Here is one that cannot be
read at all. The man could not write. But he wished to supplicate
to His Master, so he simply made marks."

Alice interrupted with: "May I pray to You?"

Our Lord: "To pray is to supplicate to God."

Dear Carrie had just had a cruel experience with her father, which,
however, she had not mentioned to the Master. Taking a supplication
in His hand, He began to dictate, saying: "This is the answer to
the letter of a person whose father drove him out because he was
a Baha'i. But God granted him a high position. His work has become
very good. His father does not even speak to him, while the son is
very kind to the father.

"This," the Master said to Carrie, "is for you too:

__________

"O thou who art firm in the Covenant!

"Though thy father was not kind to thee, praise be to God thou hast
a Heavenly Father. If the earthly father forsook you, it was the
cause of your obtaining the

mercy and kindness of the Spiritual Father. All that father can do
is to be kind to you, but this Father confers upon you eternal
life. That father will become angry for the slightest disobedience,
but this Father forgives the sins, overlooks the faults and deals
with Bounty and Favour. Thank thou God thou hast such a Heavenly
Father. And I hope thou mayest attain, through the Divine Mercy,
to the greatest Bounty.

"I remember thee; do not be sorrowful. And I am in communion with
thee in every world; grieve not.

"I hope thou mayest become, through the Favour and Bounty of the
Blessed Perfection, the means of guiding others, and in the
community of the world light a candle whose effulgence shall be
everlasting."

We all held our breath, for Carrie's father had driven her out
because she was a Baha'i. Carrie's father would "not even speak to
her".

10 July 1909

Dinner

"It is very good to be able to meet Mr Sprague here, directly from
Persia. He has been in Persia one year. He knows about the
believers very well there. And he enjoyed it very much, because the
believers there are very beautiful. They are in the utmost
condition of sincerity. "Last night I did not eat at all. I only
took a little bread and cheese. Therefore I could not sleep. So I
passed the hours in prayer and communion, walking back and forth."

11 July 1909

Munavvar, Carrie, and I were sitting in the Holy Mother's room. My
thoughts had strayed to the Master's promise for Percy Grant.
Suddenly the door opened, and His luminous Face appeared in the
sunlight against the white wall. He turned upon me His eyes,
overflowing with infinite sweetness, overflowing with the Holy Love
of God. He kept His eyes fixed on me until I could bear no longer
that Divine Love, and, to my shame, I glanced away. But I pray now
that always, when my thoughts stray to earthly things, His Face
will come to me--like this.

Later He sent for me. I sat close at His feet. Folding my hands in
His, looking down with that smile of God, He said: "How many days
have you been here?"

I knew what was coming!

"How many days have you been here? Nine is the utmost. How many
days have you stayed?"

"Twelve, my Lord."

"Three more than the utmost!" Then He told me we must go tomorrow.

Struggling to keep back my tears, I said: "I shall never leave
Thee!"

"No. I shall always be with you in spirit and in heart. You will
always be present with Me. I want you to be happy."

"I can never be unhappy again."

"Those who come to 'Akka in the spirit never can be unhappy again."

"All I want is to serve Thee. Nothing could make me unhappy but to
fail."

"You must never forget what you have heard here. You must never
forget My words to you."

"Do you think I could, my Lord?"

"No, I know very well that you could not." (The divinity of His
Face was almost more than my eyes could bear.) "I want you to live
more and more for the Spirit. I want you to forget everything save
God. Make your meetings as beautiful as you can. They are
beautiful; they are warm, for you have love; but they must progress
in spirit. Read the Tablets first. Read the recent Tablets and the
news of 'Akka. Then speak, yourself, for the strangers who may be
there. I want you to give strong, logical proofs. Read Miss
Barney's book. It will help you. Others also can speak."

11 July 1909

A strange thing had happened that morning. Alice has always
insisted on calling our Lord "Jesus Christ", and gives the Message
in this way, which is very bad for the Cause.[53] Some of the
Persian believers had heard of this.

How it happened that they gathered in the Kinneys' room I don't
know. All I know is that suddenly Carrie ran into our room, saying:
"Come, girls, hurry, something important is going on."

We followed her into her room, to see Mirza Munir and his brother
Amin and 'Inayatu'llah, a young Persian whose name I don't know,
and Mr Kinney all sitting around looking very grave. As I took a
seat, Mr Kinney whispered to me: "We want to thresh this thing
out--about the Master's Station. These Persian brothers may
convince Alice when we cannot."

"I don't believe," I whispered back, "that the Master would want
us to do that. He will straighten it out Himself."

Scarcely had I spoken the words when our Lord sent for Alice. As
far as I know He said nothing to her on the subject.

At luncheon He gave this surpassingly wonderful talk. His Power,
as He spoke, I shall never forget. It flashed from Him. His
translator could hardly keep up with Him. In the midst of His talk,
He rose and paced the small room from door to barred window with
that caged-lion motion, sometimes pausing at the window with its
clear outlook of sea--ah, and its outlook to Him of Heaven and the
hosts of Heaven!--then turning, resuming the strong, rapid stride,
letting flow again the torrent of His utterance.

He wore a black 'aba that day with His flowing white robes and
white turban. The picture is vivid to me still and will ever be:
the strong, black-and-white-clad Figure, the luminous,
ivory-coloured Face against the white wall.

"In the days of the former Manifestations of God no addresses were
given for the kings and no clear warnings were given. If you read
the whole of the Gospel you will be unable to find a single warning
to a crowned head. No prophetic statements were made. No prophecies
of the future were given except in a general way, as, for example,
the prophecies you will find in Isaiah concerning the destruction
of Babylon and the abomination of desolation in Jerusalem. However,
there is not one of the kind addressed to an individual. But the
Blessed Perfection addressed all the kings. When 'Abdu'l-'Aziz, the
former sultan of Turkey, was at the climax of his sovereignty, He,
Baha'u'llah, arraigned him severely and clearly foretold the
upheaval of his kingdom on account of the oppression he had
committed. So this was an address to a distinguished and well-known
man. It is not an address to the general nation.

"Today the greatest nations of the world are Great Britain and
America. It is easy for a man to prophesy that the British Empire
may some day undergo a reverse change, that is to say, become
disturbed, revolutionized, and utterly destroyed. This is also
applicable to France, to Germany, to America--to any of the nations
of the world. For every nation has its day of degradation. Consider
how greatly developed was the Roman Empire and what became its
final condition. Likewise Greece, how she rose and finally also
was degraded.

"The purpose is this: there is no nation exempt from this natural
condition. Namely, it shall have its rise and again it shall have
its fall. It shall have its climax and again its abyss.

"The purport is this: A man can easily address a nation thus: 'O
ye people, verily the day shall come when you shall find yourselves
in degradation!' For example, in Isaiah there is a prophetic
reference to Tyre, also to Babylon, saying: 'O thou Tyre! O thou
Babylon! Boast ye not! The day will come when ye shall find
yourselves abased, destroyed, and scattered.' His Holiness, Isaiah,
prophesied this inspirationally. But any man can thus prophecy. For
instance, a person can easily address Paris and say: 'O thou Paris!
Be not proud of thy glory, for verily the day shall come when thou
shalt be brought low.'

"These prophecies of Isaiah were fulfilled two thousand years after
they were uttered, but the Blessed Perfection addressed the very
person of 'Abdu'l-'Aziz when he was in the utmost power. He
likewise addressed Napoleon III in person. He said, 'I addressed
thee and thou didst not accept. The Lord Almighty will take away
thy sovereignty from thee.' And exactly as it was prophesied it
happened.

"When the Blessed Perfection was a prisoner of 'Abdu'l-'Aziz, when
He was in the dungeon of his majesty, He prophesied his downfall
and arraigned him severely.

"The revolution now rampant in Persia was foretold by the Blessed
Perfection forty years ago. Read the Book of the Kings. It is also
to be found in the Book of Laws. And this prophecy was made when
Tihran was in the utmost quietude and the government of
Nasiri'd-Din Shah was well established. It is clearly stated thus:
'O Tihran! There will be a great upheaval in thee. The government
will be affected and the disturbance will affect all Persia.' This
was prophesied forty years ago. It was

printed thirty years ago and is to be found in the Book of Kings,
the Suriy-i-Haykal and the Kitab-i-Aqdas.[54]

"This prophecy, so clearly and evidently stated, printed and
published, is well-known among the people. Therefore, when the
Constitution was granted in Persia, the mullas who took the
Royalist side proclaimed from the pulpit that 'whosoever accepted
the Constitution had necessarily accepted the Baha'i Religion,
because the Head of this Religion, His Holiness Baha'u'llah, had
prophesied this in His Book, and the Baha'is are agitators and
promoters of Constitutionalism. They have brought about the
Constitution in order to fulfil the prophecy made by their Chief.
Therefore, beware, beware lest ye accept it!'

"But whatever I write is inspired by the Blessed Perfection, is the
confirmation of the Blessed Perfection. Mr Sprague was in Tihran
and knows; is informed. I have prophesied all these occurrences
clearly, without need of interpretation, not in one letter or two,
but in numerous letters. When the divines overcame the Shah, the
Shah commanded the Prime Minister to go to Qum (?) and bring the
mullas to Tihran. When the divines, with the Prime Minister,
arrived in Tihran, the people showed them the highest respect and
for three nights illuminated the whole city of Tihran as a welcome
to them. They held the reins of the parliament in their hands. They
began to disagree with the Shah. A member of the parliament threw
a bomb at him. The

Shah was brought so low and made so powerless that he was incapable
of governing the assembly. However, he summoned the agitators from
among the divines. The 'Ulama refused to deliver the perpetrators
of the act and said that they did not recognize the Shah.

"At that time I wrote letters to nearly all the cities of Persia,
to Tihran, to Rasht, Tabriz, Qazvin, Khurasan, and many other
cities. I clearly prophesied this condition. You may see the
letters. Mr Sprague knows about them. He has seen them.

"The Muslim clergy had held the forces at work so completely that
the Baha'is everywhere were extremely alarmed because of the
apparent clerical supremacy. Notably the Baha'i teachers of Tihran,
especially Mulla 'Ali-Akbar, sent me a letter which I have now, in
which is this statement: 'When the clergy of Persia were
dispossessed of any power or political influence they persecuted
us unmercifully. Now that they have attained this apparent
supremacy what will they do to us? How great will be our
persecutions and ordeals!' In response I wrote: 'Know ye of a
certainty that this seeming influence and power will vanish.' It
was clearly stated in the most perspicuous terms, and Mr Sprague
can testify to the validity of this. 'The result of this influence
is the greatest degradation and loss. This supremacy will prove the
greatest defeat.' In that very letter I played on these words
'stable' and 'ultimate,' which in Persian are the same, with the
slight difference of a dot. 'They have held to this stable
(stability?) but they have not seen the ultimate of things. They
will become so defeated and conquered that their sighs, moans, and
lamentations will reach the very heavens.

This is a summary. You may find it in detail in My letters. Even
so it was that suddenly the page turned. Their foundation was
razed.

"But I did not write this of Myself. Nay, the confirmation of
Baha'u'llah wrote this! Of Myself I did not write it.

"Therefore the beloved of God must refer to Me only as
'Abdu'l-Baha. This is My glorious crown! This is My eternal
sovereignty! This is My everlasting life! Whosoever questions Me
concerning My Name, My answer is: 'ABDU'L-BAHa!

"And thus it ends!"

__________

I was struck dumb at this climax, the miracle of it, the glory and
power of it. Forevermore shall I love the Name, 'Abdu'l-Baha. As
He spoke it, it sounded so triumphant. Verily, it is our battle
cry!

When our Lord had gone from the room--like lightning--Mr Sprague
spoke. He said that when the Tablets came from 'Abdu'l-Baha it was
a great test to some of the believers. They did not see how these
Tablets could be fulfilled literally, because the Shah was so low
that everyone laughed when he was mentioned. No one had any respect
for him. And the mullas were so powerful and the Constitution so
well established it seemed against all reason and absolutely
impossible that the situation should be reversed.

11 July 1909

Our Lord sent Tuba Khanum for me and together we entered the
beloved room. Often as I paused outside to

take off my shoes, He would call: "Come, come, Juliet."

Tuba and I sat on the floor at His feet.

"You are going tomorrow?"

Struggling with my tears, conquering them, smiling at Him: "Yes,
my Lord."

"This is your last day?"

"Yes, my Lord."

As I threw back my head to look up at His wondrous Face, my veil
slipped off.

"I will fix it for you Myself," He said tenderly. "I will fix it
nicely My daughter." And with His electrifying fingers He arranged
it all around my face, crossed it at the throat and spread it on
my shoulders.

My mind flashed back to a dream--I had it in Paris eight years ago.
In this dream I stood in the air with 'Abdu'l-Baha, opposite Him
in the air. His eyes were plunging LOVE through my eyes into my
heart, the unimaginable Love of God, a new Revelation to my heart.
Then He drew from the breast of His robe a white veil, laying it
upon my head, arranging it around my face, crossing it on my
shoulders with fingers that charged me with his life--just as He
was doing now.

Now, sitting in His room in 'Akka, sitting on the floor at His
feet, raising my eyes to that incomparable Face, so beautiful in
age, I saw behind its lines the exact structure of the young
Face--the never-to-be-forgotten Face of my dream, when I had met
Him in the air.

"My Lord," I cried. "Once in a dream you put a white veil on my
head."

"That I did long ago," He answered.

After a pause He said, so gently: "Tomorrow it will be goodbye."

"Yes, my Lord."

"When can you come again?" Ah, what a sudden sunbeam!

"My Lord, how can I tell? Thou knowest. And I should like to say
this: though dear Laura Barney was Thine instrument, it was through
Thee that the doors were opened for me to come home to Thee. So,
when Thou wishest me to come again, I know that again Thou wilt
open the doors for me."

Then happened something of which I must not speak, only--He opened
the doors.[55]

"Come in the spring," He said. My King! "What do you want to ask?
Speak."

"Only for the strength to serve Thee. I have realized the meaning
of this prayer: 'Except Thy concealing veil cover us and Thy
Preservation and Protection favour us, this weak soul has not
enough power to employ herself in Thy service and this indigent one
not enough wealth to present a rich appearance.'"

"I am glad you see this now."

"I pray that I may give my life--that I may suffer--and sacrifice
everything in Thy Path."

"You are suffering now."

"But I pray to sacrifice all in Thy Path."

"You may."

"I would sacrifice everything for unity in New York."

"You will bring about unity in New York."

"Oh, how can I thank Thee, my Lord! I can do nothing for Thee
without Thee!"

Then I begged that I might see His Face in vision.

"You may."

Once during this interview, as twice before, He had looked for a
long, long time deep into my eyes, His face inscrutable.

He had said that I was suffering. I knew it. Never had I been so
conscious that my body was a dark prison. My soul yearned toward
Him and beat against bars. There He sat, overflowing with Divine
Love, tender past all comprehension--past expressing in human
language--the Centre, the Focus of that Love which holds all worlds
in its mighty grasp. And I, an atom at His feet, the worthless
recipient of such Love, not only was utterly impotent to return it
(the word "return" is sacrilege!), but could not even realize That
for which my poor heart was breaking with gratitude. Oh to be
grateful enough! my soul cried.

To be blind in the Presence of the Sun; that is not what I mean.
To be a blind beggar, loving my so munificent King to Whom I owed
life, love, all--to whom I owed even this burning love for
Him--that is nearer. No where could I find a gift for Him, for Whom
my heart longed to expand its very lifeblood--nowhere could I find
a gift for Him that He had not first given me!

"Think of Me often," He said. "Think often of what I have said to
you. Appreciate these moments. Think! If you were living in the
time of Christ, if you were Mary Magdalene at His feet."

Covered with shame, I made an effort to realize this. All I seemed
able to realize was a consuming love for that wondrous Face. What
it was my poor mind could not grasp.

"Some day I shall realize?"

"Yes."

"My Lord, I no longer look forward to life, but to service for a
few years and to meeting my Lord in His Eternal Kingdom."

"This is as it should be. We will be together forever in the
Spiritual World. But My Spirit will be with you here always--My
daughter."

Lifting the hem of His garment, I pressed a long kiss upon it.

11 July 1909, 9:30 p.m.

That night our Lord gave a feast for the Persian and the American
believers. It was held in the rear wing of this great old house,
in a beautiful long hall with many arched windows and many palms.

Seventy Persian believers had come, marching across the stony
mountains--a procession of seventy, chanting as they marched. The
had come on foot, had walked for three months, because to their
reverent spirits there was no other way humble enough to approach
the Presence of 'Abdu'l-Baha. Among them were Jewish Baha'is,
Muslim Baha'is, Zoroastrian Baha'is, all united in the passionate
belief that the Promised One of his own Sacred Book had at last
appeared on earth.

And when all were seated at the long table, our Lord became our
Servant. Passing the platters around the table, course after
course, He manifested His Servitude, while the seventy pilgrims
from Persia sat with bowed heads, silent in the most profound
humility. In that Feast, it seemed to me, I was having a foretaste
of the future, when all mankind will be one in devotion to the
Greatest Name.

When it was over and all had partaken of the food served by the
hand of the Servant of God, the aspect of the Master changed. Now
He paced up and down the full length of the table, His tread the
tread of a conquering King, His white robe, His white hair, His
white turban in the soft candlelight enhancing His ethereally. Ah,
like the Christ He was then! In that soft candlelight, His Face was
eternally young. Serenity shone on the brow of the Prince of Peace.
He was like silver!

"Tonight," He began, "is a beautiful night because, al-hamdul'illah
(Praise be to God!), the believers of America and Persia are joined
here at one table. This is one of the great fruits of the Word of
God.

"In the future the East and the West shall become one. They shall
be united. I have said in My letters that the East and the West
will become as two lovers. That each is beloved of the other. That
the East and the West will take one another in their arms will give
one another their hands, each as the beloved of the other, each
embracing the other.

"The unity of mankind will be the beginning of the radiation of
this Light. Our gathering tonight around such a table is one of the
evidences of the human unity. Generally speaking, such a gathering
would have been impossible, that is, that Persian and Americans
should sit around the same table. Praise be to God, such things
have taken place through the power of the Word of God.

"Verily, since the early days of childhood I have devoted Myself
to the Word of the Beauty of Baha'u'llah, and have forborne every
difficulty and calamity, among these imprisonment for all My life,
to lay the foundation of the oneness of mankind.

"All the different sects of the world hate and antagonize one
another. Were it possible, they would kill one another. Each of
these sects pretends that it is established and is acting according
to the law of God. Exactly the opposite is the fact. All the Divine
Words lead the people to unity, because they were spoken for life,
not for death! And the Divine Teaching is a Power that attracts the
hearts, through which all the different sects and nations will be
attracted.

"You find that the different sects are in hatred toward one
another. But you should be lovers of all sects and nations and all
the different parties of people. You should love them and consider
them as of your own families. Do not look upon them as separated
from you. Baha'u'llah has said that all of you are as branches of
one tree, leaves of one branch. That is, all the people are of one
tree. Therefore, all things that cause opposition should be
removed. Consider everyone, of every nation or sect, as one of your
own family. Deal with them with love and harmony. Never be the
cause of any sorrow to anyone, neither the cause of any
embarrassment. Bear all sorrow, for yourselves and to please all
hearts, even the hearts of your enemies. Be true to all the
different parties or nations and act toward them with faithfulness.
Take care of the properties of others more than you do of your own,
and never do any harm to those who show animosity. If you do thus,
you are a true Baha'i. Be submissive and try to control self.
Follow the ordinances of God--do not follow your own desire--that
ye may be ready always to be helped by God.

"Be sure that the different nations will curse you, blame you, bear
animosity toward you and harm you.

They will even act in such a way as to shed your blood. Beware not
to cause any sorrow to them, not even to injure the feelings of
anyone with a word. Do nothing to cause any sorrow within any
heart. These are the qualities of the Baha'i people."

He left the room. Our Sun set. Oh, how intensely, intensely I love
Him! I can scarcely see for my tears at the memory of that silver,
shining Figure! May my life be His sacrifice!

After His Words I cannot write the words of others! Dear Mirza
Haydar-'Ali, "the Angel", spoke.[56] Then one of the Persian
pilgrims recited a stirring chant which he and his companions had
sung as they journeyed from Persia to 'Akka, the refrain of which
ran thus:

Praise be to thee, powerful

Hand of 'Abdu'l-Baha!

May my life be a sacrifice to the mighty

Hand of 'Abdu'l-Baha!

Munavvar and I went to the housetop alone that night and, so tired
were we, we slept under the stars till our Lord came and woke us.

To me He said: "Your heart is Mine. Your eyes are Mine. Your brow
is Mine. Your lips are Mine, for speech. Today you are My new
creation. Say: Thank God."

"Thank God."

"Say: Thank You."

"Thank You--'Abdu'l-Baha."

"Ah ... 'Abdu'l-Baha," He repeated.

He put a ruby ring on my finger.

12 July 1909

She anguish of parting. Blind with tears, I kissed His door. No one
saw me. Blind with tears, I descended the dear stairway, my ladder
to God, the irregular steps of it worn by His feet. Each step in
the beloved court, as I crossed it for the last time, was
unspeakably precious to me.

In the passage leading from that Heavenly Shelter to the outer
world, I met Mirza Haydar-'Ali.

"I shall await your call from America," he said.

My voiced was choked. I could scarcely answer. To dear Husayn Ruhi
I could only nod.

My Lord was in His garden, but He left it, came forward, and
hurriedly passing our carriage as He turned toward the house, said
"Goodbye"--smiling in the sunlight. The pure profile, the grandeur
of His head, a sweep of His shining robe--and He was gone!

I am glad I have written to the very end in this book. I am glad
that no words will follow His, that no figure will pass through
these pages after His Sacred Figure has so passed out.

When Mary had anointed the feet of her Lord with the precious
ointment she broke the alabaster box.[57]

[Blank page]

Beirut, Syria

7 August 1909

Permission that has just come from my Beloved, from my Lord and
King to return to Haifa! This Tablet is in His own hand. We sail
tomorrow!

Miss Juliet Thompson. Upon her be Baha'u'llah.

HE IS GOD!

"O thou who art attracted by the fragrances of the Love of God! I
pray for thee and seek help and assistance from the favours of God.
... Come to Haifa. Go directly to the Household, or to Mirza
'Inayat'ullah's house ...

(signed) Abdul Baha Abbas

__________

(Footnote. 24 February 1922, 4:30 a.m. I remember, with intense
yearning for those days of life, the afternoon when that Tablet
came. In the morning I had said to Mr Kinney: "I couldn't endure
it if I should have to return home without seeing our Lord once
again." Then, in the late afternoon, the sudden appearance of
'Inayatu'llah. The Kinneys had gone to a party at the Manassehs'.
I had lingered behind, longing to be alone that I might finish
copying in this book notes I had taken in 'Akka. Just as I was
writing those final words: "When Mary had anointed her Lord with
the precious ointment she broke the alabaster box"--there was a
knock at the door and 'Inayatu'llah looked in! "Our Lord has sent
for you, Juliet," he said. "I have a carriage at the door.")

Haifa

13 August 1909

Oh day of days! This morning I gave up my will; I silenced my
heart's last murmur. Three days I had waited on the rack to hear
from my Lord at 'Akka hoping--not daring to pray for it--yet
longing unutterably to be summoned. But no word came. Then, after
I had prayed at dawn, I felt a wonderful peace. When all things are
left to His Will, I said to myself, the design takes perfect shape.
Beauty undreamed of blossoms upon our days. So, at noon, while
Farah-Angiz was reading English with me, suddenly Khanum Diya ran
into the room crying: "Juliet, our Lord!"

I flew to the door and saw, at the door of Madame Jackson's house,
where the Family lives in Haifa, the Master's carriage. With the
Great Afnan, the only companion of the Bab now living, my Lord was
entering the House.

I went to my, room and put on fresh clothes. Then I came out and
sat on the steps, riveting my eyes on the House that enclosed Him.
At least in my love I may be like Mary who sat at the feet of the
Christ of her day; and the little house of 'Inayatu'llah, so
associated with our Lord, might be the house in Bethany:
flat-roofed, low, white, with its arched doorway and its two
cypress trees. So I sat, looking, longing, loving, till He sent for
me.

He was sitting in His cool, airy room, in a large chair. How He
smiled as I entered and knelt! Taking my place at His feet, I
kissed the hem of His garment. When I

looked up, once more, into His magical Face, I received a new
revelation. Never had it looked so beautiful, beautiful to me! He
gazed down at me with the smile of Divinity.

"How are you?"

"So happy. Oh, so happy! How can I ever thank Thee for Thy Love and
Protection? May I pour out my life in servitude to Thee!"

"I have come from 'Akka," He said, "especially to see you." He
talked smilingly for a while about my unexpected return. "No
pilgrim," He said, "has come back after such a few days. But you
have."

But again He said: "How long were you in Brumana?"

"Years, my Lord!"

And He answered: "Yes, that is true!"

"I learned much in Brumana, my Lord."

"And when you return to America you will see greater results of
your visit. I knew you would not like it in Brumana." He continued,
"I knew you would have some trouble there, but you had to go
somewhere for the vacation and I knew that Haifa would not be
well."

"Did you hear my heart crying to You, my Lord?"

"Yes, I heard. I knew."

It is impossible to imagine the consolation of those words, so
often repeated: "I know; I knew."[58]

"When you go back to America, you must hide all that has happened.
You must say nothing about it. Never speak of it to anyone."

"No; oh, no!"

He asked about Carrie Kinney, what she was doing in Brumana; and
on my saying, "Many good works," 'Inayatu'llah explained, told our
Lord of our helping Dr Manasseh with the poor and sick. We had
nursed till she died a poor girl who had been fatally, horribly
burned and had assisted the doctor at a number of operations
performed without anaesthetics.

"Bravo! Bravo!" said our Lord.

He then spoke of X, said He had sent for me for my sake. Not that
He did not forgive, for He always forgave. Not that He did not feel
sorry for her. He would never have spoken of it but for my sake.
He always forgave. But He wanted to save me from an ordeal. Then
He told me of things she had done in Cairo, by which she had broken
her promise to Him, and mentioned the unpaid bill of Nassar in
Haifa.

"My Lord," I said, "there is one thing I want to supplicate for.
For the sake of the Cause, may I pay that bill?"

At first He refused to let me, but later consented. Then He looked
at me with divine sweetness and said in a voice like a breeze from
Heaven: "I love you."

"Oh my Lord," I cried, "make me good; make me good!"

Still looking me at with that sweetness, with that smile of magical
charm, He answered: "I will make you good."

Then He sent for Ruha Khanum. She came in and sat on the floor
beside me.

"Your sister," He said. "Your sister! Do you love her?"

When He called His own daughter my sister, tears sprang to my eyes.

"Do I love you, Ruha Khanum?" I asked.

He spoke much more about X, said when I saw her I must always be
kind to her and give her money if I could, but that I must not
travel with her or associate with her as a companion. I must only
associate with those who would help me to become spiritual, who
would help me to sever myself from everything save God.

"I was trying to run before I could walk!" I smiled. "I thought I
could help her, when all the time I needed to be helped myself."

He laughed in that wonderful way, humorous beyond human humour,
with a wealth of sweetness in it.

"Even Christ cannot help some people," He said. "How can you expect
to?"

But He said He felt very sorry for X. He forgave her and He would
pray for her.

"Did she say she was going to America?" He asked. "She cannot go
to America! If it were not for you and for Mrs Maxwell, who got her
out of America, she would have been arrested. And you might have
gotten into trouble there, too, with the government--ah?--if it had
not been for the protection of God. God protected you because your
purpose was good. I know many things!"

Just at that moment someone came to the door. He told me to remain
in the house and that He would send for me later. So I stayed in
the great white hall with its slender columns, looking out toward
the blue Bay of Haifa, though no longer did I need to look toward
'Akka, the casket that had lost its Pearl--its Pearl of great
price. And at last He sent for me.

I went into His room to find Him on the divan, having tea with His
sister, the Greatest Holy Leaf, His half sister, Furugh Khanum, and
Ruha.

The majestic profile, touched with the Divine sweetness, which, as
I sat on the floor at His left, I saw against the light of the
window, is graven forever on my memory. The sweep of its line; the
compassion in the forehead and lift of the brow; the wonderful
pure, strong line of the large aquiline nose; the delicacy of the
upper lip and mouth--that strong, strangely sweet mouth with the
full, but straight lips; the sensitive modelling of cheek and
temple; the perfect ear.[59]

Then began a play of humour.

"How much money did Miss X take from you?"

"Not very much, my Lord."

"How much? I know she took it, but I just wanted you to confess!
How much?"

"Too little to mention. And through her I have received a great
blessing--the greatest of all my joys--this day with You."

He laughed. "And now you are going to pay her debts! If you are as
wealthy as that, why don't you pay My debts? That would be
something to do!"

We all laughed at this.

"You cannot," He continued after a moment, "love May Maxwell
enough, or Mrs Brittingham.

"Or," He added, "Mrs Kinney. For I love them, and to associate with
them will cause you to advance spiritually."

15 August 1909

That was a happy visit to Him--may my soul forever be His
sacrifice! In the evening again He sent for me.

He was sitting on Ruha's balcony in the starlight. Ruha and I sat
behind Him in the room on the window seat. As He spoke to us He
turned His profile. Once He turned almost fully around and, with
a kingly glance, said: "I love you."

"My Lord!" I said softly. Then in a moment, gaining courage,
leaning through the window: "I love You. I love You, my Lord!"

The royal look changed to divine sweetness. He smiled.

With Ruha translating, he began to talk to me:

"As Christ said, the Word is like seed. Some seed falls upon barren
ground and withers; some upon stony ground. This springs up, but
as the soil is not deep, it too soon dies. Some upon ground full
of weeds which choke it. These weeds are like the ideas that fill
the minds of some men. They hear the Word, but their own ideas
choke it. But some seed falls upon good ground and brings forth a
hundred-fold.[60] I hope that the seed of My word will bring forth
a hundred-fold in you. Now it is just beginning to sprout. This is
just the beginning. Now I am blowing the Breath of Life into you.
If you adhere to My Words, if you obey My Commands, you will become
entirely illumined. Some visit 'Akka who have no depth, no
capacity. They go back and deny, like ..."

"Thou alone knowest the hearts," I said, for a moment terribly
afraid. "Could I ever be like her?"

"No, I did not mean to compare your heart with hers. Your heart and
hers could not be compared. In yours is a great love. From the
beginning she had no love. This is the balance: the Love of God.
By this balance you may

know the people: if they love God." After a silence, "Look at Queen
Victoria. She was the greatest woman in the world--and what do you
hear of her now? But the maidservants of God are like stars in the
horizon. This you cannot see today, but in the future it will
become clear. Consider the disciples of Christ."

Looking up at the stars, far up into the heavens, He added, "The
maidservants of God in the other world are like stars. They shine
and radiate.

"Queen Victoria was a great woman, but what do you hear of her now,
after these few years! But upon your head God has placed an eternal
crown. He has bestowed upon you eternal sovereignty. He has given
you eternal life!"

"Dear Lord, if I were to sink into oblivion, if I were to be
forgotten like Victoria, still I should want to pour out my life
as a sacrifice to Thee for love of Thee."

"It is not the name I meant. It is not for that. I know you do not
want to serve for that. I meant the results. Queen Victoria has no
results. But see the results of Christ's disciples!"

"The Kingdom of God," He continued, "is like a market. Some go home
poor at the end of the day, having lost what they had. Others come
and gain great wealth. Now you have come to the marketplace ..."

He was interrupted just then and, after the interruption, began
another theme: "From what city are you? From what city are We? You
are from the West; We are from the East; yet you are Our intimate
friend. You are the sister of Ruha Khanum. I am kinder to you than
your own father. You are dearer to me than a daughter. What greater
proof do we need of the power of the Word of

God, that the East and the West are united in such a way?

"Now if you want to please Me," He said suddenly, "you must make
Mrs B. happy. That is the next thing you have to do! You must do
everything you can to please her. You must make her so pleased with
you that she will write Me a letter about you! Try as hard to make
her happy as you tried with Miss X," he laughed. "Your friendships
must not be for personal reasons, but you must love the people
because they are beloved my Me. But it is easier to please God than
to please people! I must go now," He said. "Would you like to come
and have supper with Me?"

I followed Him to Madame Jackson's house. There He called me into
the reception room and motioned to me to sit beside Him.

Then, one by one, with bowed heads, with hands crossed on their
breasts, the Persian believers entered. I was the only woman in the
room. He invited each one of them to sit near Him, but their
reverence would not allow it. I felt mortally ashamed of myself for
my own temerity--and yet it had only been obedience--and I had left
one chair between! They sat, their hands still crossed on their
breasts and with lowered eyes, while our Lord, the majestic Centre
of the Covenant, with His matchless simplicity, talked to
them--laughing, smiling, evidently seeking to put them at their
ease and make them more natural with Him--yet never for a moment
losing His sublime majesty.

Ah, such a King the world has never seen! When He walks it is with
the step of the Conqueror of the world. He seems treading earth in
triumph, the whole earth

under His feet. Yes, "the earth is His footstool"--no more![61] The
ring of His step I shall never forget. It will ring through my
life!

That afternoon I had watched Him ascend Mount Carmel. As I stood
in the arched doorway of the little Palestine house between the two
cypress trees, watching His carriage start from His house filled
with pilgrims, He, a Monarch, in the centre. He looked long and
intently at me. Later, while I still stood gazing up the hillside
toward the Tomb of the Bab, I saw Him appear at the door of the
Tomb, luminous in His white robes with the sunlight full upon Him:
like the resurrected Christ!

"How beautiful upon the Mountain are the feet of Him Who bringeth
glad-tidings, Who publisheth Peace."[62]

__________

But to return to that blessed night when I had supper with our
Lord: Once in the midst of His talk with the pilgrims, He turned
to me and, smiling, said: "You know Persian?"

Though the others had not raised their eyes, my love (and my
ignorance) had given me courage and I had been feasting mine on
Him.

"I see!" was my presumptuous answer. Oh, I know I am crude and an
infant in such things, or I too would have kept my eyes lowered.

At the table that night He talked to Miss Gamblin, a young
Protestant ex-missionary who is acting as govern-

ess now to the children of the Holy Household--a poor girl
resisting with all her little strength the great sweetness and
wisdom and love of the Lord. It was wonderful to hear Him talk with
her. There was something eager in His kindness, a beauty of
compassion, which she could not see as compassion.

"Miss Gamblin! Which do you like better: Haifa or 'Akka?"

"Haifa, I think. I like Haifa for some things and 'Akka for
others."

"For what reasons do you like Haifa more?"

"Because here we are free to go out. Here we have liberty."[63]

"But in 'Akka there is a beautiful Garden."

"I have never seen a garden in 'Akka."

"And here there is no Garden. In 'Akka the Water is very good."

"And here," said Miss Gamblin jeeringly, "there is no water!"

"In 'Akka," our Lord went on, "there is a Meadow. Here there is
none." He spoke of the unbelief of the Jews when Christ came. With
His consummate wisdom He made her say that they were veiled by the
prophecies because they were waiting to see them literally
fulfilled.

"Did not Christ say He would come like a thief in the night?" He
asked.[64]

"Ah! But He also said 'every eye should see Him!'"[65]

There was quite a note of triumph in her voice!

"Every eye, yes," smiled the Master. "Those who do not see Him are
spiritually blind. You love Christ?" (gently).

I had never before seen that cold little face light up.

"Oh, yes."

"So do I," said the Master gravely and with great tenderness. "No
one in this world loves Christ so much as I."

"How do you think Christ will come?" He went on. "Have you studied
the science of the skies? You know what clouds are composed of? How
do you think Christ will come?"

"Oh, I don't think that Christ will come from a material heaven,
but from that place--no one knows what it is--where the
imperishable part of us goes."

"Bravo! Bravo!" said our Lord. "I am very much pleased with your
answer."

After supper He went to call on the French Consul.

The next day our Lord was to leave us, to return to 'Akka. He had
planned to take me with Him, but He changed this. He thought it
wiser, Ruha explained to me, that I should remain in Haifa till
the Kinneys came.

In the morning I rose with a bleeding heart--with a hunger and
thirst to see our Lord, to crawl in the dust behind Him all day,
kissing His every footprint if I might. Once He passed the house
and went up the mountain little way. Ah, "beautiful upon the
mountain, His feet"! I crept to the corner of the wall and gazed
down the road into which He had turned. That day He was wearing a
gold-brown camel's hair coat over His white flowing robe. His coats
are the Persian 'aba, sweeping almost to the ground. And no 'aba
hangs like the Master's. He was on His way to see a sick boy.

Later He sent for me. I found Him at Ruha's house. As He was tired,
He said, would I excuse Him if He lay down? And He lay on the
linen-covered divan, while Ruha and I sat at His feet.

Taking my hand in His, holding it close, pressing it with those
vital fingers, He looked at me, smiling divinely. I burst into
tears. I could not control them.

"What is it?" He tenderly asked.

"I love You so. I love You so. It kills me to separate from You."

"I am never separated from you. I am with you always, in every
world."

"I know. But I want to see You. Oh why do You go away today?

I should have been sent from the room, but instead He answered me
with the infinite patience of the Divine Love. "Because I am busy.
Because I am busy. I am invited to something this evening.
Otherwise I would not go. But I will come to see you again,
Insha'llah."

Again I burst into a flood of tears. "His Love is too great. I
cannot bear it," I said to Ruha Khanum. Quietly He rose and left
us, but He told Ruha to follow with me.

First, however, she took me into the room of the Holy Mother, who
had been ill. But there too I cried. I could not help it, though
it distressed me terribly to be so inconsiderate.[66]

"Don't cry so much. You are not used to it," said the dear Holy
Mother. "If you cry you will become like us, pale."

"If by crying I could become like you, I would cry till I died!"

Tears came to the Holy Mother's eyes. "I am weeping," she said, "at
the thought of the great calamities for which I wept once."

Just then our Lord sent for me. He placed me at His feet and with
those exquisite fingers wiped away my tears, looking down with the
tenderness of God on me.

"Don't cry! Don't cry!" He said in English, in that voice of
piercing sweetness, of heart-wringing Love. "If you cry, I cry!"

"Today I lunch with you," (smiling, trying to comfort me). "Don't
cry! Don't cry! I love you."

"Ah, that is it!" I replied. "Your love is too strong for the human
heart. My heart breaks under it."

Still trying to comfort me, He said: "Mariam Haney spoke much of
you. She said you were beautiful, but I find you more so."

Little Maryam, His grandchild, came in. "I give you Maryam!" He
smiled.

Oh wealth of Love--as I felt it, again my tears flowed.

"If you cry, I will slap you!" And He did! Then He held out His
hand to me.

"Which will you have: slap, or fist?" (In English, laughing).
"Which is better?"

"Whichever you give me."

He took my hand, held it, pressed it. He had risen from His chair
and now began walking back and forth. Every moment or so He stopped
beside me and with a strange gravity gazed into my upturned face.
Never shall I forget the Christ-Face shining above me then, its
celestial purity. The sunbeam of His smile had vanished. He was
like a vision, like a star! Oh, ever-varying Face, manifesting all
God's Beauties!

I lunched with Him, at His side. After lunch once more He called
me.

"See how I love you!" He said. "I have sent for you three times
today. Three times." He held up three fingers. "Now this is a
secret. Go to My sister, Khanum, and ask her to supplicate that you
may come to 'Akka. There is a wisdom in this."

I lifted my eyes to His, speechless, in ecstasy. "I had given it
up!" I said at last. "When shall I ask Khanum?"

"Tomorrow."

Soon Khanum came in. As she sat on the floor near me, He said: "You
love Khanum?"

To my shame, I began to cry--again!

"See! She cries from love," the Master said. "Of love. From love?"
(in His dear English). "You very much love, Juliet. Khanum too
loves you."

Then the others came to have tea with Him. And after this, He left
for 'Akka.

When His carriage had gone, I climbed the mountain alone. I climbed
very high and sat on a rock facing toward 'Akka, so that I could
watch that blessed carriage moving along the crescent beach till
it disappeared in the distance. And from my seat on the rock I
spoke out loud to my Lord, Who by that time was miles away.

"In all things I submit to Thy Will, my Lord, for Thy Will is the
Will of God. Thou art the Lord of Hosts. Thou art the Word of God."

__________

The Master denied the supplication of Khanum. When I heard this I
wrote Him a brief line to say that I was content with His Will. I
said nothing more, yet when His answer came, written in His own
hand, He repeated the

very words I had spoken to Him from Mount Carmel--those words of
recognition--when His carriage was miles away.

O thou who art attracted to the Kingdom of God!

Thy letter was received. Its contents proved firmness and
steadfastness. Thank God that thou hast believed in the Lord of
Hosts, were attracted to the Word of God and became the
manifestation of Godly Favours. Realize these heavenly gifts and
serve the Holy Spirit.

(signed) Abdul Baha Abbas

18 August 1909.

It is weary waiting, this waiting to see my Lord.

18 August 1909

Later

Day before yesterday, in the blessed company of Khanum and the Holy
Mother, we climbed Mount Carmel to the Holy Tomb and the Carmelite
monastery. We went into the chapel of the monastery. On the altar,
surrounded by candles, sat the Madonna, a crudely carved wooden
doll, life-size, with a scarlet spot painted on each cheek and
draped in jewels and satin. From a rose-window high in the opposite
wall--a window that faced 'Akka--rays streamed to a pool of light
on the floor. Then, in marched the brown-robed monks and knelt in
the pool of light, their backs turned to 'Akka, their bowed heads
to the altar. The rays poured on their backs as they prayed to the
wooden doll. My thoughts were running on this, condemning the
monks, when Khanum slipped her arm through mine.

"It is good," she whispered, "to be here together in a place built
for worship."

Later, in the Cave of Elijah, I saw her standing by the altar
there, that wonderful face, second only to the Master's, raised to
the crucifix; her eyes lowered once or twice to the image of the
Virgin prostrate beneath it. Ah, well could she understand such
suffering. My tears flowed as I watched her.

21 August 1909, 6:30 a.m.

The King, with His court, come yesterday to stay in Haifa till we
sail, for the Kinneys and Alice also came yesterday.

A king and his court? Faint comparison! What king ever moved with
such majesty and glory? What court ever followed with such love and
submission?

I am sitting on the steep, rough steps of 'Inayatu'llah's house,
between the two cypresses, and on the steps of the beautiful House
opposite--that white and stately House opposite--sits the King!
With Him are Mirza Asadu'llah and 'Inayatu'llah.

Yesterday He came at sundown. He sent for us all. We found Him in
the reception hall, surrounded by those wonderful Persian
believers. Yunis Khan, Badi' Effendi, and Mirza Munir[67] sat by
me. He gave us a heavenly talk which I shall have to include in my
notes, for in this little book there is just room left for His
words of love to myself, those tender and exquisite personal talks
of which I would not lose one word.

One of these I had last night. I entered His room and sat at His
feet.

"I hope you were not hurt, Juliet," He said, Ruha Khanum
translating, "that I did not let you come to 'Akka. You must be
happy because I am so unconstrained with you and feel that I can
be frank."

"Every command of Yours, since it comes from You, is dear to me."

"That is the sign of true love. I know your heart!"

"I pray that my capacity may be widened so that I may appreciate
more and love more."

A wonderful look came into His Face. He bent over mine and wiped
my eyes. This is what He always does when I am yearning to love
more, when my heart is bleeding because it cannot love enough. Even
when my eyes are dry He does this. Is He--when my eyes are
dry--wiping future tears away?

"I have been suffering," I said, "because I can give You nothing."

"You have given Me your heart."

"What is this heart to give! It is not pure enough. Dear Lord," I
asked, "would it be good for the Cause if I should marry Mason
Remey?"[68]

"It would be very good for the Cause," the Master answered me, "if
you could do it from your heart."

"I will marry him gladly," I said--my heart as heavy as lead!

"You ought to want to love him, because he is so beloved by Me."

"Yes," I repeated, with a dead voice! "I will marry him gladly."

"Try to love him little by little. Little by little," (in English).

Then He dismissed me. As I was leaving, He went to His table and,
taking a Persian sweetmeat from a box, put it into my hand.

"I give you sweets," He said.

He asked me to come back and dine with Him. "But don't tell Mrs B!
Do everything you can," He said, "to make Mrs B. happy."

"I will."

Outside in the road, in the light of the crescent moon shining
above Mount Carmel, I ate the sweets from His hand. "All that comes
from Thy hand is sweet," I said aloud. "Lord, help me to love Mason
Remey!"

The great figure of Percy Grant, with his strong beauty and
magnetism and his distinguished mind, I resolutely put away from
me. To give my body to one of His beloved: could I do more than
this? I thought. Then I laughed at the thought. After all, what is
this body? As He said once: "What does it matter what happens to
the body?"

22 August 1909

My heart is breaking. Today I must leave Him. The Kinneys have had
some trouble with their money--their cheque from New York has been
delayed--and having too little to travel with, they asked
permission last night to stay on in Haifa till the cheque came.

At sea (after leaving Cairo for Naples, via Alexandria)

27 August 1909

Just at that moment our Lord sent for me.

My heart is almost too full this morning to write. If I write
brokenly, it will be but a truer expression of my heart--my
life--as I journey away from my only Beloved into a future of
suffering, of utter sacrifice, into the Valley of Death. Yet if I
suffer, it is for Him. If I sacrifice all, the sacrifice is for
Him. If my goal is the Valley of Death, I die but to live in Him.
This morning I have felt those delicate, vital fingers wiping the
tears from my eyes.

The thought of marriage with Mason Remey has been a torture to me.
When, the other day, my Lord spoke once again of my marrying "His
son", with a new note of significance which woke in me a sharp
awareness of all that this implied, I writhed in agony. But in a
moment I lifted my face to His and said, "Thy Will be done."

To give my body to be burned would be easier, when I think of the
years and the years ... Yet I glory in the martyrdom. I desire no
less. "My body is yearning to ascend the cross." I pray that it may
come quickly. "A wound from Thee, Lord, is remedy and poison from
Thy hand is honey." If only I could suppress these tears, or
rather, rise above shedding them. On the death of her youngest son,
the Mother of our Lord smiled.[69] She knelt

at the feet of Baha'u'llah and asked: "Is my sacrifice accepted?"
Oh, to sacrifice in such a spirit!

I know now why my Lord called Ruha my sister. She was married in
the same way. But why am I so weak? I am going forth to serve Him.
Why should I think of myself? How can I think of myself at all? In
the ages to come, if this pitiful record should remain, how my
sisters of the Future will wonder that a thought of self should
have entered my mind, that I could have wasted one thought on my
human body. And since I am doing this thing to be freer to spread
the Faith, for them too I am going through with it. I feel a great
surge of love in my heart toward them.

Two Tablets I received last winter come back to me now, two that
reached me together, in the same envelope. In the one I read first
was this: "I hope that the utmost love may be realized between you
and that person (Percy Grant) and that thou mayest be assisted to
cause him to enter the Kingdom of God." And in the second: "I have
supplicated and entreated at the Threshold of Oneness that thy
utmost desire may become realized. The desire of the sanctified
souls is always sacrifice in the Path of God ..."

May God strengthen me to face Percy Grant when I return to New
York! May God strengthen me in my future relation with him! And as
I recall that second Tablet I know that a fierce ordeal is before
me. Surely this "utmost desire" of mine, this burning desire of my
heart now--"sacrifice in the Path of God"--must be proven. God help
me! Perhaps only through such a sacrifice could Percy Grant be
brought to the Kingdom. So let me die for my Lord and His beloved
ones.

__________

To return to the sweetest story ever told, the story of those
incomparable days in the Presence of my Lord. I shall not begin
where I left off but will go back a little.

On the morning of 21 August, I had waited long and hungrily, with
a burning heart, for my Lord to send for me. Waited in the little
doorway between the two cypress trees, my eyes fixed on the white
House opposite, on the stately steps, watching for Him to appear
upon them--on the long windows of His room. As the hours went by,
the fire in my heart grew unendurable. My heart was scorched,
seared: consumed. Suddenly, just at that instant when I felt I
could bear it no longer, He came out and stood on the steps. He
showed Himself only for a moment, but Khusraw at the same time ran
to call me. I eagerly followed. When I reached the House the Master
was in His room with Ruha and Munavvar Khanum.

"Did you hear my heart crying to You, my Lord?"

"Yes. That was why I sent for you. I should like you to be with Me
every moment," He said. "I want you with Me all the time. If it
were according to wisdom, I would have you here with Me always. But
it is not wise. Otherwise, you should be always with Me. I want you
to feel this."

He spoke much of Alice and His desire that I make her happy. He
told me He wished me to be His real daughter, not a daughter in
name but in very reality, so that if "His daughter in America" were
mentioned, all would know that I was that daughter. Then: "In
regard to Mr Remey," He said, "you need not do this thing. It is
not

compulsory. No one has the right to force your feeling. I have not
the right. But if you can do it from your heart, if you can love
him, I wish it very much."

"I wanted to speak about this, my Lord. I have only loved deeply
once and I could never give such a love again. But since I have
seen Thy Face, I have learned the reality of Love. I have learned
that the human love is unnecessary, that it is only a step to the
Divine Love, so that I can put it aside. Now, on the other hand,
there is this man I have loved, his feeling for me and my hope to
make him a believer ..."

"It would be very difficult to make this man a believer and you
know this," said the Master. "I am sorry," He added gently, "but
I must say these things to you.

"And if I should marry Mr Remey," I asked, "it would mean a great
opportunity to serve the Cause? It would be good for the Cause if
I should marry him?"

"Most certainly," answered our Lord, "such a union would be
productive of great good in the Cause. We will see," He continued,
"how he feels about it, and if you and he both wish it, it is My
wish. I love Mr Remey very much."

"I have always loved him," I said. "He did so much to bring me into
the Cause."

"He has brought many into the Cause."

He kept me to lunch and all through the afternoon, and His
daughters and I had tea with Him. After tea, He went up to the
Tomb.

For a while I sat in the big white hall, facing the blue Bay of
Haifa, talking with the Holy Mother and Ruha, Munavvar, and Diya
Khanum. They mentioned Fu'ad, a nephew of the Holy Mother's who is
ill, and who lives

near the top of the mountain with his beautiful sister,
Ridvaniyyih.

"How is he?" I asked. Ruha and I had lately visited him.

"I haven't heard for the last few days," said Ruha.

"I believe I will go and see," I said.

"Will you go alone to the mountain?"

"Yes, unless you can come too."

She could not, so I went alone. To be alone with Mount Carmel is
always a thrilling experience to me. As I approached Fu'ad's house,
Ridvaniyyih ran out of the door to meet me, her veil and her braids
flying, her face all aglow. "Our Lord is coming, Juliet!" she
cried. I looked up and saw Him, His Persian disciples behind Him,
coming through a grove of fig trees. How I had prayed to be with
Him on Mount Carmel! With Ridvaniyyih, I went into Fu'ad's room and
it was there the Master found me.

"You here, Juliet!" He exclaimed. Then He called me to sit beside
Him. Fu'ad knelt at a little distance. Almost at once our Lord rose
and crossed over to Fu'ad. He lifted the bandage from his eye, felt
his pulse with a tender touch, looked at him long and lovingly. So
I saw the Christ healing the sick.

Later He sat for some time on the broad stone terrace in front of
the house: Ridvaniyyih, the Persians, and I grouped around Him. He
sat silent, gazing toward the Bay. Then suddenly, up went His
hand--high, His eyes rolling strangely upward with such a
breathtaking, seeing look, as though He were greeting Someone in
the sky!

At last He left us. Ridvaniyyih and I, our arms around each other,
watched Him descending the mountain. Two

or three times He turned and waved to us. In the distance, in the
sunset light burnishing His long white robes, He appeared like a
"pillar of fire".

I soon followed Him. But before going home, I wanted to say goodbye
to Nuru'llah Effendi's wife, who, because she has consumption,
lives on the mountain alone, in a little house made of branches.
But I lost my way and had to stop an Arab to ask if he could direct
me. He was a wild-looking creature, in a short tunic and a long
head-cloth, and with a sort of satyr's leer. He seized my hand and
began to skip with me! I must say, he frightened me. Still I felt
a lovely exhilaration as we skipped lightly along, the satyr and
I, till he safely deposited me at the little house made of
branches. The wife of Nuru'llah was radiant. Our Lord had just
visited her, and the fragrance of His Presence lingered in her hut.

Going home in the dark, I met Mirza Hadi. "The Master," he told me,
"has sent me to find you. He says you should not be alone on the
mountain."

When I reached 'Inayatu'llah's house, the Master had just left it.

"He was here asking for you," said 'Inayatu'llah. "He paced up and
down the garden, repeating: 'Juliet should not be alone on the
mountain.'"

I went flying to Him to let Him know of my safe return, and of
something else. One of the Persian believers had told me that if
a group of Americans should stay here too long as guests of the
Master, it might make trouble for Him with the still-watchful
Turks. So the Kinneys' decision to wait in Haifa till their cheque
came had worried me very much and I had thought of a plan which I
wanted to speak of to our Lord.

But when I entered the reception room I found Mr Kinney there with
Him, Mr Kinney kneeling and in tears, our Lord bending over him
lovingly.

"I told you to go tomorrow only because you pressed me for a date,
but stay. Stay. I want you to be happy" (with the sweetest glance).
Then He dismissed Mr Kinney.

When I was alone with the Master and Shoghi Effendi--that beautiful
boy--who was also in the room, translating, I spoke of the Kinneys'
financial troubles and of some money I had--treasured up--for the
most sacred purpose.[70] If my Lord approved, I said, I would lend
this to the Kinneys.

"No," He replied, "they are waiting for a large sum of money, a
very large sum: five thousand francs. You have been troubled about
this." He rose and walked up and down, but soon seated Himself.
"The Kinneys," He said, "may be here for a long time yet--for a
month or two. Their money may not come very soon. Could you stay
so long? Would you have to return to your affairs?"

"Oh no!" I said. "No, I shouldn't have to return. But I will do as
you think best."

A month or two in Haifa--near His Presence!

"I want you to be happy," He said, "to do what makes you happy."

Just at that moment Munavvar came in and our Lord took us into His
room. Again and again He questioned me. What did I want to do? Did
I want to stay? Would it make me happy to stay? He wanted me to be
happy.

"To do Your will makes me happy. I cannot express a

wish. I only wish what You wish, my Lord. I want to leave
everything now in Your hands."

"Then I will tell you what I want you to do, and I want you to do
this for Me very much. I want you to take Mrs B. home. Take the
boat tomorrow night. Go to Cairo and then straight home. Take to
the believers what you have received here." He gave me many
instructions about Alice.

That night He kept me very late. First I had supper with Him.
Afterwards Ruha, Munavvar, and I sat in His room.

"I wanted to keep you here all night, your last night. I wanted you
to be with us. But there is no unoccupied room in the house."

"I have heard that once a believer stood all night outside Your
door. I wish I might have that privilege," I said.

"It will be the same," He answered gently. "You will be watching
with Me while you are at 'Inayatu'llah's house."

I shall never forget that last night. The candle burned dimly in
the room. Ruha, Munavvar, and I sat on the floor at His feet. At
times He was silent. At times He talked tenderly with us.

Though I should have remembered His words that I was "watching with
Him", all night I tossed and turned, tortured by the thought of the
marriage before me--tortured because I must leave my Lord so soon,
so soon, must leave the protection and comfort of His Presence--the
Heaven of His Presence--and go back into the world to face that
marriage.

At six-thirty in the morning He sent for me. He met me with a grave
face.

"How are you?" He asked. "Did you sleep well? You should have slept
well. It is cooler at 'Inayatu'llah's than here." Then He waved His
hand toward the House. "Find Munavvar Khanum."

When I found her, she said: "Our Lord called you just to see you,
just to see how you were."

He left the House then and went to 'Inayatu'llah's. Pacing up and
down my room, as 'Inayatu'llah told me later, He began to speak of
me. He asked how to spell my first name and said it was a beautiful
name. He spoke very beautifully of me, 'Inayatu'llah said.

"Is she happy and content in this simple room?" He asked.

I see now that in this room He was gathering up my thoughts of the
night: registering my misery.

Soon He returned and invited some of us to tea--the Ladies of the
Household and Edna and myself. First He spoke to me, then to Edna.

Oh, if only I had written down those last few talks, taken them
down from His lips! The sufferings of the days since have blurred
them in my mind. I had been thinking, during that last awful night
at 'Inayatu'llah's, of my wonderful life in New York, a life of
such thrilling interest mentally. I had thought how complete the
sacrifice would be in having to return, the wife of Mason Remey,
to the city I have always hated: Washington. Yet one ray of truth
had dawned on me: Percy Grant, so gifted, so powerfully magnetic,
so dominant, might, because of my weakness and humanness and the
strength of my attachment to him, veil my heart from my Lord. This,
Mason Remey, the angel, could never do. So, that last morning in
Haifa, the Master answered these two thoughts. Physical things, He
said, interfered with

spiritual development. Then: "When you travel you must shake from
your shoes the dust of every city through which you pass."[71]

I shall never forget the surpassing sweetness of His smile that
morning. He kept me in the House for hours. Later I went with Ruha
to her house. While we were talking we heard His voice. "Our Lord!"
cried Ruha. We sprang up to meet Him at the door and He led us to
Ruha's living room.

Ah, infinitely tender He was that day, that last day! Brokenly I
thanked Him for all His Bounties. "And for all Thou hast done to
sever me. I want nothing now but Thy Will."

"Yes. I know," He said, bending over me, looking profoundly into
my eyes. Grave, ineffably loving, sorrowful, that look. That He
suffered for me, with me, was intolerably clear to me.

Oh, I must stop suffering! When our hearts bleed, the Divine Heart
bleeds. It is true. I had one more evidence of this a little later.

While I was with Him at Ruha's house, the Master had invited me to
lunch, and as soon as He left us, I hurried to 'Inayatu'llah's to
change my dress. But people were in my bedroom, which is also the
living room--a believer was calling on Khanum Diya--and I couldn't
suggest to them to go! When at last they did, Khanum Diya assured
me I had time to dress. But then, the devil got into me: I wanted
to make myself as beautiful as I could! And everything went wrong;
it was like a nightmare! I chose an elaborate white lace dress,
fastened in the back with hooks-and-eyes and my fingers couldn't
find the right

hooks. I tried to put on my veil, a rose-coloured one with a
border, in the most becoming way, and couldn't arrange it
becomingly enough! And before I was through adorning myself,
Khusraw ran in with an appalling message: the Master and the Holy
Household were already at the table!

By the time I reached the House and the dining room, the Master had
risen from His seat and was washing His hands in a basin near the
window. He asked me to please excuse Him for leaving so soon, He
had only taken a little soup.

I sat stricken with an awful shame: speechless with shame, as I
realized overwhelmingly the disrespect I had shown to our Lord in
keeping Him waiting--and all because of my vanity!

He came back to the table and repeated: "Ask Juliet to excuse Me
for leaving her so soon. I only took soup today." And while He
spoke He looked at me, such grief in His eyes as I could hardly
bear, such grief because He had to punish me. Then He turned and
went out of the room, having had nothing to eat. To inflict that
so necessary punishment He had sacrificed His midday meal.

The rest of the meal was, of course, pure agony to me. I could not
hold up my head in the presence of the Family. Besides, a great
geyser of tears kept rising in me and it was all I could do not to
burst out crying. At last I escaped and returned to
'Inayatu'llah's.

But no sooner had I taken off my miserable finery than the Master
again sent for me. I slipped on a simpler dress and rushed back to
the beloved House, where Munavvar met me.

"Our Lord," she said, "just wanted to know where you were and
wanted you here."

We had our afternoon rest, Munavvar and I, in the reception room.
Suddenly the Master stood in the doorway, beckoning us to His room.

There, He led me to the mirror and standing close to my side, took
my face in His hand and pressed my cheek against His, then told me
to look in the mirror. So majestic He was, He appeared stern and
His Face shone with a white glory beside my flushed, earthly face.
Again He reminded me of a Star. So I saw myself in the clasp of the
Good Shepherd, and, in that ineffable picture in the mirror, I saw
my Lord's promise that He would be always protecting me, always
watching over me.

Once, during the morning, while I was alone in the reception room,
the Master came from His room into the hall and, standing in the
shadow against the white wall, like a Spirit in His white garments,
He looked at me long and steadfastly. Suddenly love welled up in
me and I smiled. A smile of intensest sweetness, of heavenly
brightness, broke over His Face; He tilted His head to one side
with tenderest charm, as though He were playing with a child. Once
more He came out, gazed gravely at me, gazed almost longer than I
could bear--so frail is the human spirit before the Force of Divine
Love--and then, like lightning, vanished.

__________

Early in the afternoon He called me into His room. "How are you,
Juliet?"

"Happy," I answered, through tears!

He looked at me with questioning, smiling eyes.

Still, underlying my anguish, there was happiness, that my
sacrifice had been accepted.

"I love you," He said gently. "I love you very much."

Then He began to talk to me, His aspect abruptly changing to one
of great majesty. If only, only I had writ-

ten down those last instructions! All I can do now is to quote
fragments of them.

"How many days were you in 'Akka?"

"Twelve, my Lord."

"How many days have you been in Haifa?"

"Twelve."

"Twelve. Always twelve. You have received in those twelve days that
which was given by Abraham to the twelve tribes of Israel. You have
received that which was given by Moses. You have received that
which was given by Christ to the twelve apostles; that which was
given by Muhammad to the twelve Imams. ... You have served me in
America. Your house has been the centre for the believers. You have
loved them and shown kindness to them. Now I want to give you some
instructions.

"The time you devote to your art is your own; you are free to use
it as you wish. But when you enter the meetings, I want you to
concentrate upon spiritual things. Read the prayers, the Tablets,
sing hymns, give the proofs. I want you to give strong, logical
proofs. ... Never let anyone speak of another unkindly in your
presence. Should anyone do so, stop them. Tell them it is against
the commands of Baha'u'llah; that He has commanded: 'Love one
another.' Never speak an unkind word, yourself, against anyone. If
you see something wrong, let your silence be your only comment. ...
Be firm and steadfast. Do not waste your time with light people."

There was more: much more. How could my memory serve me so cruelly?

Soon afterward Alice and Carrie arrived at the House. As Alice came
in, our Lord continued: "Be firm and

steadfast, and if you are firm and steadfast, be sure that no one
who really belongs in your life will be lost to you."

He then told Alice that He wished us to love each other. His words
were so heavenly that Ruha, as she listened, wept.

Just before we drove to the ship Ruha called me, alone, to our
Lord. I knelt at His feet.

"Don't let me cry! Don't let me cry!" I implored, catching hold of
His 'aba.

He took both my hands, and God's Love gazed through His eyes into
mine. "Remember My words to you, obey My commands," He said, "and
you will marvel at the results."

I dare not attempt to quote Him; everything else He said has
escaped me. All I can bring to my mind now is that Face of divine
compassion looking down at me, the strong hands that clasped mine,
the grief that consumed my heart.

"I have given you so much, Juliet," (this comes back to me)
"because I have desired your spiritual progress. You can make
spiritual progress. Now you need the power of discourse. When you
begin to speak in the meetings, never think of your own weakness,
but turn to Me."

"My only desire is to follow Thy Will. But there is one thing I
long for, Lord. May I become worthy to always keep the vision of
Thy Face?"

He bent over me with a look of profoundest love, and of assent.

"My mother and brother, Lord: protect them--under all
circumstances."

Again that low bending over me, that assent. "I will pray."

"I am bound to Thee, Lord, with a cord that can never be cut."

And with this I broke down, and hiding my face on His knee, I wept.
After a moment He lifted my face and, for the last time, wiped away
my tears with His fingers.

When He dismissed me, I raised to my lips the hem of His robe and
pressed a long, long kiss upon it.

He followed me to the door of His room. Taking my hand, He held it
against His side. "Give My love to Lua," He said. "Tell her I am
always with her in spirit."

To me He said: "I want you to return a new creation, so that all
will see that you are another Juliet, with another attraction."

__________

That night on the boat, my eyes fixed on Mount Carmel--the lights
of the Tomb glowing yellow through the moonlight, the fragrance of
the Spirit of the Lord diffused from that Sacred Spot--I wept my
heart out.

"Forevermore, my Lord, is my heart linked to Thee by this
suffering. Forevermore," I cried, "am I chained to Thee!"

I remembered His words of a few days before: "I suffer. You must
suffer with Me." And my suffering became my treasure of treasures.

Mary broke the alabaster jar and poured all her precious ointment
over the feet of her Lord. And last Sunday I broke my heart over
the feet of my Lord--poured out all the love it contained at His
feet. No more love have I now to give. It is given--to Him.

He told me that He would strike me, and, as He said it, He laughed.
So many I "endure the cross, despising the shame."

Diary of Juliet Thompson: Chapter 3 Chapter 2 Chapter 4

With 'Abdu'l-Baha in Thonon, Vevey, and Geneva

23 July to 23 November 1911

48 West Tenth Street, New York

8 April 1936

"Love devastates every country where He plants His banner."

In 'Akka I had looked upon the Mystery of Love and of incarnate
Sacrifice. I returned, this vision filling my eyes, blinding me to
all lesser values. This, and the fact that I was so immature both
spiritually and in worldly wisdom, caused me to become, myself, the
instrument of the devastation. But I devastated not my country
alone, but others. When, this winter, I read my diary of 1910, I
was crushed with shame, and remained so for weeks, because of my
blind, cruel blundering all through that awful year. Then came a
flash of what I believe to be perception, and this has comforted
me. My Lord, 'Abdu'l-Baha, Who "saw the end" where I saw "only the
beginning" (and in Whose compassionate hands are the lives of all)
had, in reality, offered me two choices: first, my own will; then,
His Will--or what appeared to be His Will. Though I played my small
part so miserably, at least I chose the Master's Will. When in my
extremity I still clung desperately to His Will, He released me
from my engagement to Mason Remey. As for "the other man": as I
review the whole drama of my connection with his life, ending in
tragedy, it is clear that at every crisis, something diviner than
fate stood between us. 'Abdu'l-Baha, had another plan for me. And
this, I believe, was His plan from the beginning.

[Blank page]

S. S. Lusitania. Atlantic Ocean!

Sunday, 23 July 1911

Nothing could have been further from my thought than that I should
begin this volume somewhere off the coast of Ireland! I had
expected to begin it in our new home: a small, very old house on
Tenth Street, from the windows of which, if I lean out just a
little way, I can see the tower of the Church of the Ascension, and
even--the rectory!

But there came a Call ...

Ten days ago, on 13 July, I received a letter from Ahmad.[72] To
my infinite surprise, for I had only just heard from the Master,
I found it contained a Tablet. These are the words of the Tablet:

O Thou who art attracted by the Breath of the Holy Spirit!

When thou wert leaving to return to America and this made you sad
and unhappy and you wept, I promised I would summon you again to
My Presence. Now I fulfil that promise. If there is no hindrance
and you can travel in perfect joy and fragrance, you have
permission to be present. In this trip there is a consum-

mate wisdom and in it praiseworthy results are hidden.

Upon thee be Baha'u'l-Abha.

(signed) Abdul Baha Abbas

In Ahmad's letter was the amazing news that the Master was on His
way to London to attend the Universal Races' Congress which was to
open the following week and last for three days.

"If you can sail in a week," wrote Ahmad, "you will find our Lord
in London."

I leapt over every "hindrance" (and three of them were high walls)
and within the week, with Silvia Gannett, boarded the Lusitania.

Just before I left I broke the news to Percy Grant. He said
something blasphemous--violently--then did something to break my
heart.

Well, that is no "hindrance," I thought, I can leave him to her.

He spent the last evening before I sailed with me.

"Don't you want to send a message to the Master?" I asked.

A mocking look came into his face.

"He sent you one," I went on, "from 'Akka, when I was there. But
I have never been able to tell you about it, because whenever I
have mentioned the Master to you, Percy, you have answered in a
flippant way. But I can't go back to Him now until I have delivered
it.

"I spoke of your work to Him and He called you 'a great soul'. Then
He invited you to visit Him. I can repeat His very words. 'When you
return, say to Dr Grant: If you will go yourself to 'Akka, you will
find that

which is beyond imagining. If you go, you will find all you had
imagined useless in comparison with the Reality. If you go you will
receive that for which you would not exchange all the kingdom of
the world.'"

"That was a very whole-souled message," Percy replied. "Tell Him
that if He comes to New York I will welcome Him gladly. Tell Him
I think He would find New York a big enough field even for His
great work!"

"I don't think that message will do," I said.

"Tell Him, judging by His fruits," (with a meaningful look at me)
"His Teaching is the most beautiful spiritual force in the world."

"I shall certainly not tell Him that!"

"Tell Him I am very happy to have a share in those fruits--"

"No; nor that either."

"I can't suit you with a message! Well, tell Him I feel that what
He is trying to do in the world is very beautiful and potent."

Then I gave up!

S. S. Lusitania

I should like to write of a dream I had two days before my Tablet
came, for I think it is something that should be kept.

I had been praying at dawn. Afterwards, putting the Master's brown
'aba over my bed and hoping for a vision, I fell asleep.

I awoke in a vast, dim crypt, with many aisles branching away into
utter darkness. I was standing, alone in the crypt, beside an
enormous grey sarcophagus. Then in

the far, far distance, I saw two figures in white, in long robes
and turbans, walking out of the shadows in my direction, and I
recognized the Master and Mirza Haydar-'Ali, "the Angel of 'Akka".
Something is going to happen; I shouldn't be here, I thought. But
I can't escape now. There is nothing to do but hide. And I crouched
behind the sarcophagus. The next picture in my dream is of the
Master and Mirza Haydar-'Ali bending over the sarcophagus. Then
they lifted its lid and dropped into it, drawing down the lid after
them. Now I could make my escape! I tried to steal away on tiptoe,
but before I had taken a dozen steps, my shoes creaked! At this,
the Master rose from the centre of the sarcophagus, His face
unsmiling--stern.

"You may stay," He said, "but keep perfectly still."

Once more I crouched, holding my breath.

First there was an awful silence; then, from within the
sarcophagus, I heard the strains of a solemn chant; then groans,
followed by blood-freezing screams. And I thought, What can the
Master be doing to Mirza Haydar-'Ali?

But somebody else was in that sarcophagus. The end of it suddenly
burst open and out of it dashed a figure racing up and down so fast
that all I could see were flying garments and a shaven, bluish head
with a black fez on it. At last, exhausted, he sank to his knees
on the ground, shielding his face with one arm. Then he rose and
crept back into his coffin.

Then, down every aisle of the crypt came armies on the march, a
standard-bearer with a flag leading each regiment, so that soon all
the flags of all the nations drooped above the sarcophagus as the
armies gathered around it. And then I saw a lovely woman standing

among the flags. She wore a long white tunic, her hair was bright
gold, and she radiated light.

While I watched this brilliant and formidable scene, wondering how
'Abdu'l-Baha could be concerned with a pageant, the figure with the
bluish head and the fez again broke open the end of the
sarcophagus. But now I saw: Satan himself! Now he was naked, fully
exposed, with a white body and great dark bat's wings springing out
from his shoulders--even with the orthodox tail and hoofs! And now
he stole from his hiding place and, like a
serpent--sinuously--wound his way in and out between all the
standard-bearers, creeping under all the flags, wriggling his way
among all the armies, all the national groups!

The dream changed. I was in New York, in the Peoples' Forum. Percy
Grant was sitting on the platform in the Parish Hall and his
mother, Sylvia Gannett, and I standing among the empty chairs just
vacated, I knew, by a large audience. I bent to kiss Mrs Grant. She
looked up, her eyes full of tears.

"I have seen Him," she said, "the Master. He spoke to me. Oh, there
was never such a Face in the world!"

"You have seen Him!" I cried. "Where was He?"

"In here; a moment ago."

"But--a moment ago He was in the sarcophagus."

Then Percy rose and went out. London

Friday, 4 August 1911

I am still in London, waiting for the Master to come. He did not
attend the Universal Races' Congress. They had asked Him to speak
on philosophy and to make no

reference to religion, so He sent a representative,
Tamaddunu'l-Mulk. (Tamaddunu'l-Mulk is about four feet high and his
name means The Civilization of the Country.)

The three days' conference opened with an ode written by Alice
Buckton. Here is one verse: They come! Who come? Listen! What
thunderous tread of viewless feet From citied walls where waters
meet, From isles of coral foam; From Western prairies red with
corn, From sacred temples of the morn, They come!

True British idealism! The last session ended in a brawl. Annie
Besant ("Pa, with Ma's bonnet on her head," as Mrs Standard called
her) took the platform and hurled the monkey wrench.

"This talk is all very well. But what about India?"

Then--the uproar in crescendo till the very last minute!

When I hear that the Master was not to be at the Congress, I cabled
to Him for instructions. The answer came: "Wait."

London

9 August 1911

I have just had another cable from our Lord. It says: "Remain."

Here in London a little group is humbly preparing for His coming.
Devoted hearts are waiting for Him. Every night we all gather at
dear Miss Jack's and pray.

The English believers have been so kind to me: dear Miss Rosenberg,
dear Mrs Knightley (who calls me "cousin", since we have an
ancestor--Lord Edward Fitzgerald--in common), Mrs Stannard--the
most fascinating woman, whom I met in Beirut two years ago and
immediately loved; Lady Blomfield; the Jennens; Miss Faulkner; Miss
Buckton; and others. And our own believers who are here: Maud
Yandall, the Chicago friends with their warm hearts, my beloved
Isabel Fraser, Miss Pomeroy, Rhoda Nichols, Albert Hall and
Mountfort Mills. And, of course, little Tamaddunu'l-Mulk. Post
Office Telegraphs: Thonon-les-Bains

22 August 1911

THOMPSON, 5 SINCLAIR ROAD, LONDON.

COME HERE. HOTEL PARC.

(signed) Abdul Baha France

23 August 1911

(We are on the way to the Master, Tamaddunu'l-Mulk and I, and
though we are sitting up all night long in a second-class coach
with a family of four Swiss peasants--oh, we are so happy!

Oh, tomorrow! But I cannot imagine tomorrow. Tomorrow I shall be
with Him in Europe, in the mountains of Switzerland.

The "Sun of the West" moves toward the West, and, in this majestic
advance, this thrilling moment in time and in eternity, when, in
His actual Presence, He rises and shines on the West, He has
blessed and honoured this humble child of His by calling her to His
side. All day, as

[Photograph: A group of Baha'is in London (c. 1912).]

I travelled through France, I seemed to be hastening toward Him
down a path of white radiance.

How strange! It was 13 July, two years ago, when I tore myself,
weeping, from my Lord in 'Akka. It was on 22 August, that I said
my heartbroken goodbye to Him in Haifa. This year, on 13 July, came
His Tablet, "summoning" me again to Him; and this year on 22
August--yesterday--the summons to Switzerland came.

Tamaddunu'l-Mulk is asleep. I shall spend the night in prayer.
Wonderful night! More wonderful: the Daybreak! Hotel du Parc,
Thonon, on Lake Geneva

27 August 1911

A great white hotel. At its entrance, two oleander trees in bloom.
Inside, high ceilings, white walls, glass doors, rose-coloured
carpets, rose-coloured damask furniture. Beyond the green terrace
with its marble balustrade, Lake Geneva. Behind the hotel, two
mountains overhung with clouds. In the halls and strolling through
the grounds: gay, artificial, dull-eyed people. Passing among these
silently with His indescribable majesty, His strange Power and His
holy sweetness, the Master--'Abdu'l-Baha--unrecognized but not
unfelt. As He passes, the dull eyes follow Him, lit up for a moment
with wonder.

I found my beloved Laura and her dear husband, Hippolyte
Dreyfus-Barney, already here.

__________

(It was Laura who gave me the Message, bringing to me the greatest
of gifts in earth and heaven and changing the whole direction of
my life. It happened in this way: I

had been almost fatally ill and was slowly recovering in Washington
when I said one day to my brother, "Coming so close to death makes
you think. And I have been thinking lately that it is time for
another Messenger of God." The very next day Laura burst in on me,
taking me by complete surprise, for I had not heard of her return
from Paris. "Yesterday, Juliet," she said, "I was in Bar Harbor.
Tomorrow I sail from New York for Palestine. But I couldn't sail
without first seeing you to tell you why I am making this
pilgrimage. Juliet, the Christ-Spirit is again on earth, and--as
before--He is in Palestine."

During my illness, the night of the crisis--months before Laura
came to me--I actually saw 'Abdu'l-Baha. In the midst of physical
anguish and with darkness closing down on me, I had felt a great
pulsation of love from the head of my bed and thought that my
mother must be sitting there. I turned and, instead, there sat a
Figure built up of light, with a dazzling turban and hair like a
flow of light to His shoulders, and with His hands cupped on His
knees. Jesus is here, I thought peacefully and glided away into
sleep. And when I awoke the crisis was passed. Later my mother said
to me: "That night of the crisis while I was praying I saw a great
Light shining beside your bed.")

__________

On the morning of 24 August, on my way to the door of my Lord, I
met the last person on earth I would have looked for, Percy Grant's
friend, Dickinson Miller.[73]

"You here!" I gasped. "I always wanted to tell you about this."

"Why didn't you?" he asked.

I left him in a moment, I could not wait, and flew up the long
white hall (blessed hall where His voice and footsteps ring!) till
I came to an open door. Tamaddunu'l-Mulk had already entered. I
paused at the door. Then I saw ... saw once more after these years
of unspeakable longing: my Father, my King, and my Beloved.

He was just moving forward in the room, His white robe, His black
'aba sweeping in lines of strange grace, dominated by that head of
immortal majesty. In an instant I was at His feet.

I have no words to tell it. Can words paint Glory? The smiling Face
that looked down on me then, as though from high heaven? One thing
I know: God always smiles--smiles mysteriously.

"Are you happy, Juliet? Happy to be here? How many years since you
were 'Akka?"

"A lifetime!"

He laughed.

"You had a long wait in London? When did you arrive? You were put
to trouble to wait?"

"Oh no! Your Presence was with us in London. The friends were very
kind to me. And if I was waiting, it was for You, my Lord."

"Or course the friends were kind. The believers must all serve one
another. I want you to be the first handmaiden of God. I am the
believers' first Servant. You know how I serve them."

I covered my face with my hands, for I realized our littleness and
saw Him as the Word of God.

"How is your mother?" (in English) "Your mother? She is good--very
good?"

"She is always good."

"She is pleased with you?"--looking at me archly, knowing quite
well she was not!

"Not very, I'm afraid," I laughed.

"The day will come when she will be pleased with you, when she will
be very proud that you have received such bounty and favour from
Baha'u'llah."

"Will it come in her lifetime, Lord?"

"Insha'llah!" Then He nodded His head assuringly.

I had been exhausted when I came, after staying up all night long;
I had not been able even to wash. But suddenly from His Presence
I felt Life flowing, rushing toward me; I felt an electric current
revivifying me, and when I went to my room and looked in the
mirror--afraid of what I might see in it I found that I had a
bright colour and my lips were brilliantly red.

__________

(Footnote. When we arrived at Geneva in the early morning a train
for Thonon was just about to start. Not even to wash could I wait
for the next train! There was no time to telephone or send a wire
to the Hotel du Parc, so that, naturally, when we reached Thonon,
no one was at the station to meet us. Nor was there a conveyance
of any kind. Only a wheelbarrow! "All right, Mulk," I said, "we'll
take the wheelbarrow. We'll put our luggage on it and walk behind."
"Oh, we couldn't do that!" said the elegant little Persian. "I
can," I replied. And we did--and arrived at the Hotel du Parc on
foot behind the wheelbarrow!) Vevey, Switzerland

28 August 1911

I am in Vevey with Edith Sanderson. My heavenly Visit is over. Yet
I am not separated from Him.

"We will never be separated." He said to me. "I shall be with you
always. You will go back to America and I may return to 'Akka, but
we will be together." Geneva

31 August 1911

I sailed from Vevey today down the Lake of Geneva. There was a
heavy mist and the mountains loomed like phantoms through it. The
lake, full of swans and white sails, gleamed. The Swiss shore was
veiled to a tender green, its chalets and villages blurred like
etchings on blotting paper.

From Lausanne I strained my eyes toward Thonon. Then, suddenly the
boat turned and made straight for the French shore. My heart
leaped. We were going to Thonon: Thonon, my Paradise!

Ah, there were the fishnets spread out in the sun; there the grove
of trees at the landing with that brilliant foliage--such a
polished green that it looks wet--and in the dark shade under the
trees, the lily-bed; there, there His hotel, white against the
mountains. I could even see the window of His room!

Eagerly I searched the faces at the landing. Surely little Mulk
would be at the landing, to meet me and take me back to my Lord.
It must have been for this that the boat had docked at Thonon.
Hippolyte, Laura perhaps ... No. There was not one soul I knew.

With unspeakable desolation, with a sense of utter helplessness,
I found myself carried away from Thonon. Heaven was behind me then!

The perspective of the mountains changed. The rowboats rocking on
metal waves, the funicular railway, the grey old house with its
shaggy brown roof which Laura

and I had found so interesting--all the familiar landmarks become
in those four full days intensely intimate--receded and were
blotted out by the mist. The hotel only remained, a "White Spot",
seeming to grow with the distance miraculously whiter, flashing its
message to me as long as it could; for, though at last the mist
dimmed it, it was not till a physical object intervened, not till
a ridge of the shore came between, that it vanished from sight.

Then came a frantic desire to communicate with Thonon. This cannot,
must not be the last, I thought. I will telephone Hippolyte as soon
as I reach Geneva.

In the Hotel de la Paix I went straight to the phone.

"Ah Juliet!" said Hippolyte's dear voice. "Do you know that the
Master will be in Geneva tomorrow? He wished me to get into touch
with you to tell you that He was coming. And He wishes Edith and
her friend, Miss Hopkins, to join you at your hotel and spend
tomorrow night with you. He will arrive with the Persians in the
evening."

__________

To go back to that blissful day in His Presence, to that first
lunch hour.

Mr Miller had been invited to lunch and the Master placed him, with
me, at the head of the table, Himself sitting at the corner, I on
His right. Our table was half closed in by big white columns. Mr
Miller asked some questions, on work in and with the Christian
Church, on the validity of mystical experiences, and, at my
suggestion (with Percy Grant in my mind) on the economic problem.

The Master was specially vivid and vital that day, yet these words
seem so poor, so human. I can think of Him

only in terms foreign to earth: "The Dawning-Point of Light," "The
Dayspring" ...

From His radiant height of knowledge He gave us great answers, but
to put these into my own language would spoil, would desecrate
them. More than one phrase I repeated to Professor Miller out of
sheer delight in its perfection. He would nod in response with a
happy look.

In reply to the question about the church (most important to Mr
Miller as he is considering resigning his chair at Columbia to
enter the ministry) the Master said religion was one truth which
the sectarians had divided; however, the Light can be found
everywhere, and it was good to unite with the people, especially
in work for humanity and when one's own motive was pure. He dwelt
on the purity of the motive. All that tended to unite was good;
whatever resulted in division was harmful. I am sorry to repeat
only these broken fragments. His answers were so clear, so
brilliant, so simple that you wondered at your own question. But
the words themselves were elusive. Mortal lips could not frame such
phrases, nor mortal ears register them.

As to mystical experiences: most assuredly the saints and mystics
had real experiences. The proof of the experience was its fruit.
If the result was spiritual we might know the experience was from
God.

"Ask a question for me," I said to Professor Miller. "I know what
the Master will say, but I want the answer for Dr Grant. He doesn't
see the need for the Baha'i Teaching. He thinks it a sort of
'Quietism'. He says that to bring about social progress we must
first work along practical lines."

Mr Miller put the question beautifully. "There are some who feel
this way," he ended, "and one man in

particular feels it so strongly that he is making it his lifework."

"Such people," replied the Master, "are doing the work of true
religion."

Then He went on to explain that a new order must come, but first
a solid foundation must be laid for it, and no foundation was solid
enough except religion, which was the Love of God. Such a basis as
the Love of God, He said, would inevitably result in the rearing
of a great Structure of social justice and individual love and
justice.

"These are just the answers," said Professor Miller, "that Dr Grant
would like."

The Master then told him of the Divine Plan for a House of Justice
and of the Mashriqu'l-Adhkar.

After lunch we sat in the reception room: a large white room, all
mirrors and glass doors (and rose-coloured furniture), looking out
on the lake, the terrace and the stone balustrade.

In the morning, in the Master's room, I had mentioned my
acquaintance with Professor Miller.

"I always wanted," I said, "to give him the Message."

"Now I have given him the Message," laughed the Master.

"Now I see why I did not!"

After lunch Mr Miller spoke of his friendship for me.

"Your love must increase from this day," said the Master. Whereupon
the professor, who is very shy, blushed as red as the chair he was
sitting on and looked really frightened. "You must become like
brother and sister," our Lord hastily added, with one more lovely
phrase on the future of our spiritual relationship. As Professor
Miller took his leave, he seemed to be deeply moved.

"I shall never forget this day," he said.

The Master put His arms around him, then gave him a good strong
slap on the back and bade him goodbye most lovingly.

When he had gone, the Master turned to me: "Now there is something
for you to do, Juliet! I put him under your charge. There is a
chance for you!"

All that day was heavenly. The Master was either in my room with
Laura and Hippolyte, or we were in His, in the most charming
informality. He gave us no spiritual teaching--in words--only
talked gaily or tenderly with us. I had no private interviews: in
fact, He took very little notice of me. But in spite of all this
I saw something vaster than I had ever seen before; I felt His
unearthly power, His divine sweetness even more than when I was
with Him in 'Akka. Once as He stood on the stairway talking with
Mirza Asadu'llah, the sweetness of His Love brought the tears to
my eyes. It is useless to try to express it. But I said to myself
as I looked on that celestial radiance: If He never gave me so much
as a word, if he never glanced my way, just to see that sweetness
shining before me, I would follow Him on my knees, crawling behind
Him in the dust forever!

__________

That night (24 August) at dinner, He turned to me smiling and said:
"Did you ever expect, Juliet, to be in Thonon with Me in such a
gathering?"

"No indeed I did not! May we all be in just such a gathering with
You in New York!"

"I have made a pact with the American friends. If they keep the
pact I will come."

"The believers are much better friends than they were."

"I shall have to know that! Baha'u'llah," the Master

continued, "was bound with a chain no longer than the distance from
here to that post." With a sudden terrific agitation He rose and
pointed to a column close to the table. "He could scarcely move.
Then He was exiled to Baghdad, to Adrianople, to Constantinople,
to 'Akka--four times! He bore all these hardships that unity might
be established among you. But if, among themselves, the believers
cannot unite, how can they hope to unite the world? Christ said to
His disciples: 'Ye are the salt of the earth, but if the salt has
lost its savour, wherewith shall it be salted?'"[74]

"It is not Juliet's fault," said Hippolyte.

"No, it is not Juliet's fault. If every one of the believers was
like Juliet there would have been no trouble," said the
Master--mercifully.

"If I had done my whole duty I might have accomplished more toward
unity."

"I hope you will become perfect. Insha'llah, through the help of
Baha'u'llah, you will be perfect. When you return to America,
Juliet, I want you to do your best to bring about unity."

"I will do my utmost to carry out every suggestion you make to me,
my Lord. I will work, not alone for the sake of the believers, but
for the sake of others who would follow You if they could see You."

"Had it not been for these divisions," said our Lord, "the Cause
would have made great progress by now in America."

__________

The next day, 25 August, was intensely interesting. Early in the
morning He called me into His room, with Tamaddunu'l-Mulk as
interpreter.

"Are you happy, Juliet?"

"So happy and so at rest. This is the happiness of the Kingdom."

He asked me about the election of the new Board in New York. I told
Him what I could and that I had brought a letter explaining.

"Is Mr Hoar on the Board? Mr MacNutt?"

"I don't know, my Lord. I sailed before the election."

Then I spoke of how Mr MacNutt had been forced out of
everything.[75] If he were not on this new Board, which had been
organized by his friends, it was, I felt sure, by his own choice.
He thinks of himself as a stumbling block to harmony and now keeps
out of the way.

"I proposed this change Myself,"[76] said the Master, "in order
that he might serve on the Board." Then He laughed, with that
wonderful gleam of humour in His face. "All these Boards and
committees: of what importance are they? The really important thing
is to spread the Cause of God. I am not on any committee.
Tamaddunu'l-Mulk and Mr Dreyfus," (for Hippolyte had just come in)
"are not on any committee!"

"Speak to Me, Juliet."

My heart was too full. I could not. After a moment I said: "May I
sit on the floor?"

"But you will be tired."

"Oh, no!"

I sat on the floor at His feet.

"This is like 'Akka," I said, looking up at that matchless Face.
Then, to surprise Him, in Persian: "Man

Shuma ra khayli, khayli dust daram." (I love You very, very much.)

Taking my hand and pressing it, smiling down at me, He said
something in Persian to Mulk.

"What is He saying?" I asked.

"He is praising you very much. He says that your heart is pure. He
Himself bears witness to this. He is your witness. He proves your
heart to be pure." (Mulk had already told me of all the slanderous
letters about me received by the Master.) "If He says this it makes
no difference what the people say."

The Master spoke again to Tamaddunu'l-Mulk.

"He says He sent for you out of pure affection. It was nothing but
affection. There was no other motive in His sending for you." Mulk
had told the Master how badly I felt about my broken engagement to
Mason Remey. "He had promised to send for you again and He thought
that while He was in Europe would be a good opportunity, that you
could come to Europe more easily than to 'Akka."

"Beg Him to so fill me up with His Love that I may express my
gratitude for this affection by true service in America."

"He says that you are already full of love for Him and when you
return to America you will serve Him; that your attraction in this
Cause and your devotion to it are in themselves service."

"I feel that I have failed in all I undertook to do when I last
left Him. I have had great lessons in my own weakness."

"The Master says your weakness will be turned into strength."

"You will be strong--strong," said the Master directly

to me in English, "and when you go back this time you will have a
greater power."

Letters were brought to Him and He talked of various things.
Tamaddunu'l-Mulk handed Him a booklet of Warwick Castle, where, at
the invitation of the Countess of Warwick, the members of the
Races' Congress had spent a day--we with them, of course. The
Master laughed, pushed the book away and gave Mulk a slap.

"What do I care about it?" He asked. "If a good believer lived in
it, that would be different! Once, when I lived in Baghdad," He
went on, "I was invited to the house of a poor thorn-picker. In
Baghdad the heat is greater even than in Syria; and it was a very
hot day. But I walked twelve miles to the thorn-picker's hut. Then
his wife made a little cake out of some meal for Me and burnt it
in cooking it, so that it was a black, hard lump. Still that was
the best reception I ever attended."

I had two more private talks with our Lord that morning. In the
second, something I said brought forth this answer: "The child does
not realize the parents' love, but when it becomes mature it
knows." He said this looking out of the window and His face was
very sad.

"Can the creature," I asked, "ever know the Love of the Creator?"

"Yes. If not in this world, then in the next, as a sleeper wakens."

It was during my third visit to Him that I spoke of the Holy
Household, spoke of each beloved one with tears in my eyes. His own
kindled with the warmest love as He answered: "They too love you,
Juliet, and always talk of you--especially Munavvar. It is always
'Juliet, Juliet.'"

"Oh, may I go and see them again?" I asked.

"Assuredly you will go and see them again."[77]

__________

At noon that day we had royalty to lunch! Bahram Mirza of Persia.
Prince Bahram's father is Zillu's-Sultan, who, as the eldest son
of Nasiri'd-Din Shah, would have succeeded to the throne but that
his mother was not of royal blood. It was though the orders of
Nasiri'd-Din Shah that the Bab was executed and thousands of Babis
massacred, while through Zillu's-Sultan's orders those two great
Baha'is, "The King of the Martyrs" and "The Beloved of the
Martyrs", and at least a hundred others, met horrifying deaths. Now
the whole royal family is in exile, Zillu's-Sultan and his sons in
Geneva, while 'Abdu'l-Baha walks free in Thonon--so near!

The day before I arrived, Zillu's-Sultan came over to Thonon for
a few hours, and straight to the Hotel du Parc.

Hippolyte Dreyfus, when he was in Persia, had met this Prince, had
visited him in his tent while he--the prince--was on a hunting
trip. And now he met him again on the terrace of the hotel. The
Master too was on the terrace, pacing up and down at a little
distance. Hippolyte was standing in the doorway when he saw
Zillu's-Sultan coming up the steps. The prince approached and
greeted him, then turned a startled look toward the Master.

"Who is that Persian nobleman?" he asked.

"That," answered Hippolyte, "is 'Abdu'l-Baha."

And now Zillu's-Sultan spoke very humbly.

"Take me to Him," he begged.

Hippolyte told me all about it: "If you could have seen the brute,
Juliet, mumbling out his miserable excuses! But the Master took him
in His arms and said: 'All those things are in the past. Never
think of them again.' Then He invited Zillu's-Sultan two sons to
spend a day with Him."

And so it was that Prince Bahram came to lunch.

A beautiful boy--Prince Bahram--like a Persian miniature. His skin
is as smooth as ivory, his straight features finely chiselled, his
eyebrows meet in a thin, black line across His nose. But being so
young he is wholly unawakened spiritually, and he hasn't any
manners at all! After lunch, assuming the privileges of a royal
prince and Muslim, he stalked out of the room ahead of Laura and
me--when the Master, in spite of our protests, had insisted on our
preceding Him. However the Master said later: "Bahram Mirza bad
nist," (Prince Bahram is not bad) so I can afford to be tolerant!

After lunch, returning to the white- and rose-coloured room, the
Master placed me on His left and the prince on His right and we all
had coffee. The coffee was served first to the prince. To my great
surprise he rose and offered his cup to me. Too completely
disarmed, I immediately "bent over backward", figuratively
speaking.

"Won't you keep it?" I asked.

"No," he replied solemnly, "it has two lumps of sugar in it. I
don't like two lumps of sugar."

Neither did I!

__________

At three o'clock, after bidding prince Bahram goodbye, we did the
most amazing thing: the Master, Laura, Hippolyte, and I went for
an automobile ride!

"Did you ever think, Juliet," said the Master, laughing, as we got
into the car with Him, "that you and Laura would be riding in an
automobile with Me in Europe?"

We drove to a country inn where a little later, after a walk, we
were to have our tea. As the Master stepped down from the car,
about fifteen peasant children with bunches of violets to sell
closed in on Him, formed a half circle around Him, holding up the
little purple bunches, raising their eyes to His Face with grave
astonishment. They pressed so close that they hid Him below the
waist, and the benediction in the look He bent on them I shall
never forget. Of course He bought all the violets, drawing from His
pocket handfuls of francs. But when He had given to each child
bountifully, they held out their hands for more!

"Don't let them impose!" cried Laura.

"Tell them," said the Master very gently, "that they have taken."

He turned and walked into the forest, followed by Laura, Hippolyte,
and me. Hippolyte had told Him of "the Devil's Bridge" deeper down
in the forest, a place celebrated for its beauty, and the Master
wanted to see it. His excitement over beauty is wonderful to watch
and perfectly heartrending when you think of His long, long life
in prison. He--our Lord--led us to the Devil's Bridge! I can see
Him now, just ahead of us, the white robe, the black 'aba, the
white turban, the beautiful sway of His walk among the trees.

"What is it," I said to Laura, "that makes that stride of the
Master's so unique? Its absolute freedom?"

Laura found she couldn't walk as far as the Devil's Bridge, so I
waited in the woods with her, both of us

seated on a rock, while Hippolyte followed our Lord.[78] When they
returned, the Master sat down on another rock and beckoned me to
His side. So close to Him, the fragrance of His Divinity enveloped
me and I realized at least something of the moment's sacredness.
Just in this way the disciples of nearly two thousand years ago
must have sat with their Lord to rest. The sunlight through the
trees made their leaves translucent, but even against that green
glassiness, the Master's clear profile shone, like a lighted
alabaster lamp.

We walked back to the inn through the woods, He leading us. As soon
as He reappeared on the lawn of the inn the children again swarmed
around Him, their hands still outstretched. Laura sternly ordered
them off, for they were certainly imposing. "He would give away
everything He has," she whispered to me. But the Master had
discovered a tiny newcomer, a child much younger than the others,
with a very sensitive face, who was looking wonderingly at Him.

"But," He said, "to this little one I have not given."

We went into the inn (after the Master had given to the "little
one") and had tea on the porch, sitting at a rough pine table on
a rough bench--two mountains, with evergreens climbing them,
towering above us. The inn was in the cleft between. At another
table sat a man who could not keep his eyes off the Master and at
last ventured to speak to Him, opening the conversation by saying
that he had lived in Persia. Our Lord called him over to sit with
us--which he almost leaped to do--then invited him to come to
Thonon.

Again, when we left the inn, the children swarmed around the Master
and again Laura tried to save Him from their greediness.

"But here," said our Lord, "is a boy to whom I have not given."

"You gave to them all," said Laura.

"Call Hippolyte," ordered the Master. "I did not give to this boy,
did I, Hippolyte?"

"I believe you did not."

Then the Master gave.

In the years to come they will tell stories along the Lake of
Geneva of the visit of 'Abdu'l-Baha to Thonon. Then those little
children, perhaps old men and women by that time, remembering a
Face like a great dream at the dawn of their lives, may ask one
another: "Was it He?"

__________

Driving home, we came to the most spectacular waterfall, foaming
down a black precipice. The Master peremptorily stopped the car and
with a sort of excitement got out of it; then walked to the very
edge of the precipice. After standing there for some time, His eyes
fixed on that long, shining torrent, which seemed to be shaking off
diamonds in a fury, He seated Himself on a rock hanging over the
deep abyss. I can still see that Figure of quiet Power perilously
poised above the precipice, that still, rapt Face delighting in
some secret way in the beauty of the waterfall. Tears came to
Laura's eyes and mine.[79]

During the whole drive He was always discovering lovely things and
with vivid animation pointing them out to us: the bright green of
the fields and hills, the neat villages, a spire rising from a
cluster of Swiss houses, or from some lonely spot on a mountain.
A tiny village, high among the peaks, caught His eye.

"How can the people there stand the winter? It must," He said with
the tenderest sympathy, "be too severely cold for them."

It was just after we left the waterfall that the Master turned,
smiling, to me. "If I come to America, Juliet, will you invite Me
to see such waterfalls?"

"I will invite You to Niagara if You will come to America! But
surely, my Lord, Your coming doesn't depend on my invitation."

"My invitation to America will be the unity of the believers."

"Louise Stapfer asked me to give You her love and beg You to come
and unite us. Otherwise, she said, we will never be united."

"No, you must do that yourselves. See in what perfect harmony we
are now! You are not complaining of one another. But if I should
go to America they would all be complaining of one another and ..."
(He laughed and made a lively gesture with His hands) "I would fly
away!"

Once, breaking a silence, He said: "There was no one in the world
who loved trees and water and the country so much as Baha'u'llah."

So sad was His voice that it was like a sigh and I seemed to feel
what He was thinking. He was free at last to travel about the world
and see all the beauties of

nature, which He too loved, while the Blessed Beauty had lived for
long years walled up in that treeless city, 'Akka, and died still
a prisoner.

A little later I spoke: "If only, like the disciples of Christ, we
could follow You everywhere, all through our lives."

The Master beamed brightly on me. "We are together now. Be happy
in the present," He said.

I mentioned my dream about the crypt and asked if I might tell it
to Him, but it sounded so awfully queer as I told it that Laura,
Hippolyte, and I began to laugh; and the Master's own face twitched
a little, I thought. However He said: "You must not laugh at this
dream," and asked me to go on telling it.

But just as I came to the end, our car drew up at the gate of a
ruined castle and we all got out and walked over to look at it.
After this I was sure I would hear no more of my dream, but as soon
as we were settled in the car again the Master reopened the
subject.

"You must write down that dream, Juliet," He said.

"I have written it, my Lord."

"Ah, Khayli khub!" (Very good!)

Then He said something to Hippolyte, laughing, and with those vivid
gestures of His, continued to talk for some time. What He said I
couldn't catch--I know such a tiny bit of Persian--but Hippolyte
told me afterward, rather reluctantly! that the Master was speaking
about dreams. He had laughed at Hippolyte because he did not
believe in them and had explained that there were three kinds of
dreams: dreams that come from some bodily disorder, symbolic
dreams, and those in which future events are clearly foretold. When
the soul is in a state of

perfect purity it is able, He said, to receive a direct revelation
from God. Otherwise, it sees in symbols.

Then He told us the story of a man, a Christian, who had visited
Him in 'Akka and expressed his disbelief in dreams.

"But," said the Master, "your own Sacred Writings mention such
things."

Still the man remained sceptical. A few months later, however, he
reappeared in 'Akka, sought the presence of the Master, and
immediately fell at His feet and attempted to kiss His hand, which
the Master will never allow.

"In the Name of Baha'u'llah, let me kiss Your hand," pleaded the
Christian. He then went on to confess that now he did believe in
dreams. He had learned, he said, through a sorrowful experience
that the Master had spoken the truth to him.

One night when he was away from home he had had an alarming dream
of his little daughter. She had come to him, sat on his knee and
complained that her head ached. Rapidly she grew worse. They sent
for the doctor. The father knew in his dream that she was
hopelessly ill and felt the most acute anguish. Then he saw her
die.

The following night he returned to his home and his daughter came
and sat on his knee. "Father," she said, "my head aches." Then
followed her illness, her death.

"As the mind has the power when awake to think constructively or
to dissipate its powers uselessly, so, when the body is asleep, it
can either construct or dream meaningless dreams."

"When the body is asleep," I asked, remembering a theory, "can the
mind construct at will?"

"No, no," said the Master.

As we drove toward Thonon, the sunset flooded the sky with glory.
Behind the immortal head of the Master rose amethyst mountains,
their summits hidden in rolling fiery clouds. But that Godlike head
surpassed both clouds and mountains in grandeur.

Entering the town we passed a stone wall with an enormous sign
painted on it--an advertisement for chocolate--the letters so big
that the sign was a block long.

With one of His swift changes, the Master, rippling with amusement,
pointed to the advertisement.

"What is that?" He asked.

When Hippolyte explained. He burst out laughing.

"Is chocolate so important in Thonon?"

__________

While I sat at His feet that evening He sang a song to me, looking
down at me with eyes of glory. "Beloved Juliet! My heart! My soul!
My Spirit! My heaven! Your heart for Me, your breast for Me! Always
for Me, always for Me! Your eyes for me, your mind for Me, Always
for Me! Your soul for Me, your spirit for Me, Always for Me, always
for Me! Your blood for Me, your blood for Me, Your blood for Me!"

__________

What does He mean by my blood for Him? Am I to die for Him? I hope
so!

The Master had made a lovely plan for the next day: we were all to
go to Vevey with Him to visit Mrs Sander-

son and Edith,[80] but--we missed the boat! Although we were
terribly disappointed, this was as nothing compared to the
nightmare that followed. Annie Boylan[81] arrived from Lausanne
about ten o'clock, completely surprising us, as we had no idea that
she was in Europe.

She came into the Dreyfuses' room--where Hippolyte, Laura, and I
were sitting--in a state of suppressed fury and almost immediately
boiled over with the most revolting slander against Mr MacNutt.
This, she said, she intended to lay before the Master to prove that
Mr MacNutt was unfit to serve the Cause. She had made the trip to
Thonon especially for this purpose!

But the Master did not appear, and I thought of His words the day
before: "If I should go to America they would all be complaining
of one another and I would fly away." He had flown!

Hours passed and still no word from the Master, till lunchtime.
Then Mulk brought a message from Him asking us to excuse Him, He
was not well enough to lunch with us but would see us later.

It was not until five o'clock that He came to the Dreyfuses' door.
He looked very tired and worn. After greeting Annie Boylan
lovingly, He took a seat by the window and told her He had a
message for the believers in New York which He wished her to convey
to them. I wrote His words down as He spoke them.

"In this Cause," He said, "hundreds of families have sacrificed
themselves. There have been more than twenty thousand martyrs. The
breast of His Highness the Bab

was riddled by dozens of bullets; Baha'u'llah suffered years and
years in prison; and We have had all these difficulties and borne
all these trials that the canopy of Oneness might be uplifted in
the world of humanity, that Love and Unity might be established
amongst mankind, until all countries become as one country, all
religions be merged into one religion, all the continents be
connected and between all hearts a perfect understanding and love
may appear.

"The people of Baha must be the cause of uniting all the nations.
They must dispel inharmony and dispute. So now we must consider
deeply how the Baha'is must really be, what characteristics they
must have and what actions they must perform.

"And if there is not this love and harmony among Baha'is how can
they cause it to appear among the inhabitants of the earth? How can
an ill man nurse others? How could a pauper give wealth to others?
So the first thing the Baha'is must do is to feel love and unity
in their hearts before they can spread it among others.

"Is it possible to conceive that all the troubles, all the trials
of Baha'u'llah and the martyrs have been without result? Surely you
will not have it so! If you would all act entirely in accordance
with the Teachings of Baha'u'llah no discord would ever appear.
Then all disagreements will vanish, and be certain that the
pavilion of Unity will be hoisted in the world of man.

"Each nation, each people that has understood and felt the Love of
God has progressed and developed, but where discord has sprung up
in the midst of a nation, that nation has been dispersed.

"I know you would not have all these trials and dif-

ficulties produce nothing. Therefore I am waiting and expecting to
hear that love and harmony have blossomed in the hearts of all the
Baha'is in America.

"Now the Baha'is must be occupied in spreading the Cause of God and
furthering the instructions of Baha'u'llah, and not spend their
time in disputing with one another. If they do the first, all will
be happy; they will be assisted by the Breath of the Holy Spirit
and become the beloved of His Heart."

While the Master was speaking Annie Boylan continued to bristle,
jarring the whole room as she seethed with her bottled-up "proof",
which now of course she dare not "lay before the Master". She
couldn't even mention Mr MacNutt! I saw her as an embodiment of the
discord in New York, and those terrific vibrations, blasting into
the Master's happy holiday (the first one in all His life), nearly
killed me. I listened really in torture.

Suddenly the Master turned to me.

"What is the matter, Juliet? Are you not happy?"

I answered in Persian that I was unhappy.

"You must be happy," He said, "that you are going back to New York
to serve Me."

When Annie Boylan had gone, the Master came into my room.
Tamaddunu'l-Mulk was with me and we placed a chair for Him by the
window, from which He could see the dark sweep of the mountains.
I said it had torn me to pieces to hear the jangle of discord in
His Presence.

"I know," He answered, "and that was the reason I told you to be
happy, for you were returning to serve Me. I meant that you were
returning to work for unity."

"Oh my Lord," I said, "wasn't it Abraham who prayed to the Lord to
save Sodom and Gomorrah for the

sake of five righteous men?[82] Now," I laughed, "I am going to be
like Abraham and beg You to come to America for the sake of just
a few, for some will never understand."

The Master, too, laughed--such humour in His eyes.

"If it were not so long a trip: if it were a little trip, like
Paris, or London, or Vienna, I would come for your sake," he said
tenderly. "But when I come it must be for a long visit. I am going
to Chicago, to Washington, and even to California, and I have not
the time this year. But I will come--Inshallah!--when the moment
arrives."

He spoke of Mr MacNutt. "The reason I suggested this new election,"
He said, "was that Mr MacNutt might serve on the Board again. But
do not tell anybody this; it would only stir up a quarrel. However,
go directly to Mr MacNutt and tell him I said this. He is not on
this Board, but next year something must be done so that he may be
elected. I have," He concluded, " a very great affection for Mr
MacNutt."

__________

Hippolyte told me that night that if the Master felt well enough
we would go to Vevey on Sunday and that after he had waked the
Master he would wake me at seven o'clock. But it was the Master who
woke us all! At six came a rap at my door and I heard His dear
voice.

"I want to go!" He said in English. Then I heard Him down the hall
calling "Mademoiselle!" at the door of Tamaddunu'l-Mulk: little
"Civilization of the Country", who has taken to corsets lately to
improve his figure.

Oh, that day; that day!

We drove to the boat all together--nine of us--in a big

station wagon, the Master placing me opposite Him. At the landing
is a dense grove of trees--I think I have already mentioned
it--with polished-looking leaves and very dark shade under them;
in the shade a bank of white lilies and close to the lilies a
bench. The Master asked Laura and me to sit on the bench with Him.
Soon, however, He rose and went off alone and for a while we lost
sight of Him. When we saw Him again He was walking on the bench,
behind fishnets hung out to dry.

Laura touched my hand. "See where He is, Juliet," she said.

"Yes: on the shore of a lake--behind fishnets. Oh, Laura!"

He walked slowly on, looking almost transparent in the
early-morning sunlight, till He came to the edge of the grove.
There He turned inland and walked among the trees. Through their
leaves, the sun flecked His bronze 'aba with fiery spots dazzled
on His turban and His long silver hair and drew a crystal line,
like a halo, down His profile to His feet. A child, light as a
fairy, glistening in her white dress, danced up a path to His left.
Our Lord stopped for a moment to watch her. Then, mysteriously, He
vanished! We saw the boat coming closer, closer, and looked around
wildly for the Master. Where and how had He disappeared so quickly?

On the landing we found Him waiting for us, and followed Him to the
gangplank. All the people on the landing stared at Him as He moved
quietly forward with that strange power and that holy sweetness.
Children raised their eyes to His face. He put out a tender hand
and caressed their heads.

We gathered around Him on the boat, Laura, the Persians, and I, and
for a while He sat silent and grave in our midst. Then suddenly He
turned and smiled at me.

"You never dreamed, Juliet," He said, "that you would be with Me
in a boat."

"I have often dreamed that I was with You in a boat!"

"But you never thought it would be fulfilled in this way!"

"No," I smiled. "I never did. I couldn't have imagined this!"

To be with Him in a boat on this lake so like the Sea of Galilee!
He sat with His bronze 'aba around Him, His hands hidden in its
full sleeves, so that the sleeves with their straight, massive
folds looked like great wings. The mist-veiled Alps were His
background and His Majesty so dominated them that they appeared as
no more than a filmy drop-curtain. The mist thickened, almost
blotting out the mountains, blending them into the lake, and I felt
that we had left earth with Him and our boat was sailing through
ether. Just as I was thinking this, He said: "Others are passing
from an immortal to a mortal kingdom, but the Baha'is are
journeying, in the Ark of the Covenant, from a mortal to an
immortal world. The Jews once turned to the Kingdom, but when they
looked backward to mortal things, they became dispersed. Then
Christ led men to the Kingdom; their signs have remained. God be
praised that now you are on a Ship bearing you to immortal worlds.
Day by day your signs will become clearer."

Later the Persians brought Him tea and when He had finished I
begged to "drink from His cup". Mirza Rafi', adding some water to
the kettle, poured out a cup for me.

The Master turned and smiled at me; then He laughed. "The tea for
Me, the water for Juliet!" He said.

I am sure the future will adore Him also for His humour. The joy
of His spirit overflows in the most

delicious humour and gives Him a look of unconquerable youth.

"O Son of Delight!" I have just seen this phrase in the Hidden
Words. The Master is all delight. Bay of Naples

3 September 1911

On 3 September 1909 after leaving the Holy Presence in Haifa, I
sailed from Naples. Here I am again on 3 September 1911. These
strangely repetitious dates! Tonight, as I saw that great pile of
beauty, Naples, rising, jewelled with lights, against the clear
rose of the afterglow--as I heard the voices of singers in the
distance--how vivid were my memories of 'Akka, Haifa; of the Master
there! It is midnight now and I am too tired to write, but tomorrow
I will tell they story of our day in Vevey.

4 September 1911

We arrived at Vevey. Edith was waiting on the landing and we drove
with her to the hotel. There, we went straight to the room reserved
by her for the Master. To my joy He called me to sit beside Him.

Mrs Sanderson (Edith's mother) has never been attracted to the
Cause. She has felt like my own dear mother about it, not caring
at all for most of the believers! But she could not take her eyes
from the Master's face. "His beautiful face!" she whispered to me.
Two of Edith's friends came in, Miss Hopkins and Miss Norton.

Miss Hopkins is a Catholic, Miss Norton an agnostic. Miss Norton,
when she saw the Master, seemed to be

strangely overcome. Her face trembled, her eyes widened, as though
she were looking at a spirit. I thought that at any moment she
would burst our crying.

She and Mrs Sanderson brought up the question of immortality (which
Mrs Sanderson feels it is cowardly to believe in) and I wrote down
the Master's answer as Mulk translated it. Here it is, though I
hate to give it in Mulk's poor English. Edith understands Persian.
"You cannot imagine," she said to me, "how ruinous the translation
is. The Master puts life into every word. Translated, the words
sound flat. Besides, the Persian is so rich and He has a way of
saying the same thing over differently, in various poetic forms and
with subtle shades of meaning. In the translation it is all alike."

____________________

"Christ and all the Prophets have taught in their Holy Books the
immortality of the soul.

"Jesus during His life had so many afflictions and no happiness or
comfort and in the end He was crucified. If there were no
immortality to follow, then nothing could be more useless than such
a life.

"Take, for example, the life of Hannibal. In the world we would
find none happier than he, for his life was one of pleasure and
conquest and he triumphed wherever he desired. But Jesus had many
afflictions. Were there no immortality we might say that Jesus was
not even rational. But at the hour of His crucifixion, He knew He
was leaving the mortal for the immortal life; He knew He was
leaving the physical to ascend to the spiritual world. When they
put on His head the crown of thorns, He thought of the crown of the
Kingdom. While He was hanging on the cross He thought of the
eternal throne.

"But now we come to the proofs. Those who do not believe in
immortality have some proofs. For example,

one is this. They divide existence into two kinds; imaginary
existence and that of the senses. They say that since the immortal
kingdom is not of the senses there can be no such kingdom. This is
their proof! By this proof they deny!

"But Jesus and Baha'u'llah answer the people who do not believe
thus: Every rational man can see that the world has come out of
non-existence into existence. Life progresses from the mineral
kingdom to the vegetable kingdom, from the vegetable to the animal,
and from thence to the human kingdom. Were there no spiritual
kingdom, life would be useless.

"For example: We plant a tree, we water and care for it. From
branches we see it advance to leaf and from leaf to fruit. Should
the fruit be opened and found to contain nothing, all would be
useless. So the people of common sense, studying the universe, see
that creation must have a result.

"The people of the world say: 'Where is the immortal world? When
we look about us we do not see it. We only see the world of
elements.' Therefore the Prophet says: 'Those in the station below
cannot see the station above.' We are in this room, we cannot see
beyond the ceiling. We are downstairs, we cannot see upstairs.

"For example: The mineral kingdom has no knowledge of the vegetable
kingdom. The vegetable kingdom knows nothing of the animal kingdom.
Nor is it possible that it should know of the animal, because
it--the vegetable--is of a lower grade; the animal is in the higher
condition. If the vegetable kingdom deny the existence of the
animal kingdom, does this disprove the animal kingdom's existence?
No, the animal kingdom exists, but the vegetable kingdom cannot
imagine the reality of it. The reason the vegetable kingdom cannot
imagine the

animal kingdom is because it cannot comprehend it. But this does
not disprove its existence.

"Now we come to the human kingdom. In the human kingdom is an
intellectual power not possessed by the animal kingdom. The animal
cannot imagine this power. A Spaniard discovered America. The
animal could not understand this. The intellectual power is not
disproved because it is not understood.

"As to the spiritual kingdom: An unborn child cannot understand
this world. It cannot imagine a world beyond the womb. If we could
tell an unborn child that there is another world, with mountains,
villages, cities--so many beautiful things--could he understand?
Never! Therefore Christ said one must be born a second time. As a
child, by coming to this world, understands the conditions here,
so we should go to the spiritual world to understand its
conditions. The Prophets were born in the spiritual condition to
understand the immortal world.

"For example: The unborn child would deny the existence of this
world for the reason that he knows nothing of it and the best
condition to him is the world of the womb, the best food his
nourishment there. He could not visualize this world. But when he
is born and arrives at understanding, he sees what a beautiful
world this is.

"So with the spiritual kingdom. The people of this world cannot
comprehend the conditions of that immortal world, but, when they
reach it, they see that this, in comparison, is just like the world
of the womb. The unborn child says: 'This is the best world. I am
quite satisfied with it. I must not leave it.'"

__________

The Master turned suddenly to me. "Do you understand all this,
Juliet? I want you to know these things very well when you return
to America."

I had been saying to myself: Oh, Mrs Sanderson, look at the Master
and see Immortality!

The next question--Mrs Sanderson's--was about divorce, if
Baha'u'llah approved of it.

"Baha'u'llah,"--the Master smiled--"says that in this world there
is nothing more absurd than divorce. If one has accepted another
and is a good Baha'i he never likes to believe in divorce. But if
there be a case of difference between husband and wife, where it
is entirely impossible to recreate their love, where it is not
possible for them to live any longer with one another, then both
should go to the House of Justice and together, in perfect
agreement, lay their case before it. And after this they should
still wait a year, living apart but not permanently divorced, and
their friends should give them good advice meanwhile. If, after one
year, there is no possibility of becoming reunited, and no one is
able to influence them, then this is the natural divorce.

"But between the real Baha'is there is no divorce. No one has ever
heard of divorce between real Baha'is. The Baha'i husband and wife
will not allow affairs to reach such a condition."

Luncheon was announced and Miss Hopkins and Miss Norton rose to go.
As Miss Hopkins bade the Master goodbye He said: "I will pray for
you."

"And I will pray for you too," she answered.

This gave me a shock. At the table Mrs Sanderson spoke of it,
saying that her own feelings had been "outraged" by it.

"No," replied the Master, "do not feel that way. It came from the
heart; therefore it was beautiful."

I shall never forget the way He said "beautiful".

The Master had asked me to sit by Him at lunch. He was on the right
of Mrs Sanderson, who sat at the head

of the table. He talked with the gentlest love to her. Soon she
brought up the name of Lua and then asked me: "Have you heard from
Lua lately, Juliet?

"I love Lua," she added.

"My mother loves Lua too."

"Your mother," the Master turned to me, in His voice that ineffable
tenderness with which He always mentions Mamma.

"I wish my mother were here with Edith's mother."

"I shall see your mother."

I tried to speak a little Persian to Him and He helped me to
construct the phrases. He had told me a day or two before that I
must be sure to study Persian. "You see," He had said, "I can talk
with Laura."

__________

Lunch over, the Master went to His room to rest, after stopping in
the hall for a moment to meet an old French lady, Madame Naber.
Everyone scattered then and, finding myself alone, I slipped
through a side door into the garden; and there on a stone bench sat
Madame Naber and Mrs Sanderson, their white heads close together.
They didn't see me at first.

"Il a l'air si bon, si simple," Madame Naber was saying.

"Oui, et les yeux de feu!" said Mrs Sanderson.[83]

Then they looked up and smiled at me and Mrs Sanderson said:
"Wouldn't you like to see the view from the terrace, Juliet?"

I took the hint and walked over to the terrace, from which you can
get the most marvellous view of the lake and the mountains on the
further side.

Imagine my astonishment to find, sitting in the shade of a tree,
Mrs Griscomb and Professor Mitchell of the Church of the Ascension!

Mr Griscomb and the Professor have been for some time vestrymen of
the Church and have always actively opposed The Peoples' Forum,
which is Percy Grant's chief interest. "My capitalists" Percy calls
them. They are also Theosophists and have a very select group of
their own, never mingling with the big ordinary group! But I was
glad to see them just because they were from the church, and flew
over to speak to Mrs Griscomb. She is a plump, pretty little woman
with at least two professors and a husband at her feet. Professor
Mitchell is sort of willowy and has a walrus moustache and, on his
thin aloof nose, pince-nez with a wide black string.

"Why!" exclaimed Mrs Griscomb when she caught sight of me. "What
are you doing here?"

"I have come from Thonon with 'Abdu'l-Baha to lunch with the
Sandersons. Do you know Mrs Sanderson, Mrs Griscomb? Won't you let
me introduce you?"

"I should prefer to talk with you."

A little surprised, afraid I had made some blunder, though I
couldn't imagine what, I hastily explained. "I asked on the impulse
of the moment because it would be such a joy to present you to
'Abdu'l-Baha."

"Thanks, I'm not at all crazy to meet 'Abdu'l-Baha."

The silly, insulting little answer went straight through my heart
like a knife.

"I'm glad, however," she added, "if He gives you pleasure."

"Mrs Griscomb," I said, 'Abdu'l-Baha is creating unity all through
the world among all races and religions, which is a far more
important thing than giving anyone personal happiness."

"I am one of those who do not decry personal happiness; and really
I don't want to meet 'Abdu'l-Baha."

"You will see Him," I said as I moved away, "and then you may
regret refusing."

By that time the Master was up and receiving the friends in His
room. I rushed to the refuge of His Holy Presence. I was tingling
all over, actually suffering physically from the blow of Mrs
Griscomb's flippant blasphemy. As I entered the Master's room He
sent me a searching glance but said nothing. And of course I said
nothing, till I had a chance to talk to Edith.

__________

A little later in the afternoon, Edith, her mother, Laura, and I
sat on the terrace with the Master. Mrs Griscomb and the Professor
were no longer there, but, Edith said, they were watching from
their windows, Professor Hargrove standing beside them. Professor
Hargrove, whom Percy calls "his mystic", is staying with the
Griscombs in Vevey. They have a garden apartment in the hotel where
they even eat their meals, associating with no one. It is
understood they are very busy studying occultism and must not be
interrupted in their search for Truth!

The whole thing is extraordinary. It was through Professor Mitchell
that Dickinson Miller was brought to Percy Grant's church. Now both
professors come to Switzerland and are drawn to the neighbourhood,
even to the Presence, of "the Dawning-Point of Divine Knowledge."
How different the reactions of the two! In Professor Miller, at
least a timid response, a peeping out of the soul. In Professor
Mitchell: a back turned superciliously!

Professor Mitchell, Professor Miller, and Percy Grant belonged
about four years ago to a sort of club, where,

with other professors of Columbia University they met to discuss
religion. Professor Mitchell, whose memory is very accurate, wrote
reports of those meetings and published them in book form. The book
is extremely interesting. All through it the note is sounded that
a great new Light is shining upon the world.

It ends something like this: "The Mathematician, left alone after
the departure of his guests, goes to the window. In his ears ring
the words of the Clergyman: 'The rebirth of the Christ in the whole
of humanity is close at hand.' The Mathematician looks up at the
stars and the vision of John on Patmos occurs to him. 'Even so,'
he whispers, 'come quickly, Lord Jesus.'"

"The Mathematician" is Professor Mitchell and "the Clergyman",
Percy Grant. And if this is not tragic, then I don't know what is!

__________

Edith drove down to the landing with us to meet the boat, which was
to take us back to Thonon. But, as we were early, the Master
proposed our waiting in a nearby garden. There, on a bench under
a tree, Laura, Edith, and I sat beside Him, while the Persians
stood around us. One of them mentioned Barakatu'llah, whereupon the
Master turned to me with such a funny look of accusation! His
eyebrows went up and His eyes laughed. In my confusion I dropped
my gloves and He stooped to pick them up, which completely
humiliated me.

"Oh my Lord, don't!" I gasped.

At last the boat came. The Master stayed on deck for a short time,
during which I kept very quiet, not wishing to speak; wishing only
to fix in my mind that Godlike head with the Alps for its
background. Then he went off to rest.

After He had gone, a man who was sitting close to us

spoke to Mirza Rafi'. "May I ask who that gentleman is?" he said.
"I am very much attracted to His face."

"'Abdu'l-Baha a Persian exile," answered Mirza Rafi'--too
reticently, it seemed to me.

"I thought He might be the sultan's brother, who, I hear is living
in Geneva."

He evidently meant Zillu's-Sultan! As he continued to ask
questions, Laura gave the Message very ably. Beside the man sat a
boy of about sixteen, with fair, curly hair and the face of a
Botticelli angel. He leaned forward and listened eagerly.

Later the Master came out from His cabin, but the man and the boy
had left the boat at Eviens.

The Master called me to sit by Him, Mulk sitting on the other side.

"Are you tired?" I asked.

"No, I am never tired. I am very comfortable." He spoke in His
sweet English.

Touching the beautiful bronze-coloured 'aba, I said: "The coat You
wore when I was in Haifa, which You afterward gave to Edna, was
like this in colour, and we shared it, Edna and I. She would be so
sweet as to lend it to me; then I would return it to her; then she
would lend it to me again. It was such a comfort to me, that coat.
At night, or in the early morning, I would bury my face in its hem
and pray. Then I would seem to be kneeling again at Your feet, my
Lord."

He smiled very tenderly while I was telling Him this.

"Edna has become very dear to me. And she loves You very much."

"Ah, Khayli khub."

"I want to speak of a friend of Edna's and mine--a very dear
friend--a girl who is very, very close to me,

whom I love with all my heart: M. M.[84] It is difficult for her
to serve the Cause on account of her husband."

"She must serve in the Cause. Her husband must not prevent her.
Neither the husband nor the wife should hinder the other's work in
the Kingdom. She must not pay any attention to that but must serve
firmly. Thus she will make great progress. She must try to give her
husband the Message."

"She loves You very much. Her life has been one of great trial and
sorrow."

"Bravo! Bravo!" said the Master. "It makes no difference that she
has sorrows. These have been the cause of her development. Through
sorrow the soul always advances. The greater the difficulty, the
greater the progress of the soul. Now she must begin to serve
firmly in the Cause. So, she will make great progress."

Soon, all too soon, we reached the shore.

As the crowd on the boat stood still while the gangplank was
lowered, two children in front of the Master turned and lifted
their eyes to His face, and their eyes seemed to say: Is this God?
They were very little children; they came just about to His knees.
With a strong, lingering touch, as though He were leaving something
with them, He pressed and fondled their heads. Then the crowd
surged forward; the children and the Father were separated ... for
this life?

After our return, in the early evening, Laura and I were sitting
in the Master's room. He began to speak in Persian, laughing, and
I caught the words "Mrs Sanderson." Then He turned to me and, still
laughing, repeated in English: "Mrs Sanderson thinks this world

is good enough. Very nice, this life!" And He laughed again.

Later, while Mulk was writing in my room, the Master came in and
called us into His. "Now, have you anything secret to say to me?"
He asked.

"I have a message for You from Dr Grant."

"Ah!" He smiled. "Tell me."

"I told him it wasn't a good enough message and that I would not
give it to You."

"Give it just the same."

"He sent You his greetings and said he hoped You would come to New
York. That if You came, he would welcome You gladly. That he felt
the work You were doing in the world was very beautiful and
potent."

"Convey My greetings to him. Say: 'I am entirely thinking of you
for the sake of Juliet who has mentioned you to me. Say that at a
later date I will come to New York.' Is there anything else you
wish to say, Juliet?"

"There is not a desire in my heart, my Lord."

"This is as it should be. The daughters of the Kingdom should not
have a desire."

"I should, like, however, to tell You a little of what has
happened."

"Speak," said the Master.

"When I became engaged to Mason Remey," (The Master looked archly
at me; I smiled, but penitently.

"Dr Grant was very unhappy and disturbed, so one day I sent for
him. I told him I was marrying Mason because I wished to be freer
to serve the Cause."

"That was a very wise answer. You did well," said the Master.

"But I gave him another reason. I said that the Cause

had spread in the East through sacrifice and I felt if this same
spirit could be demonstrated in the West, this spirit of
renunciation which was all-powerful, that the Cause might begin to
spread there."

"I know!" said the Master, His eyes full of love.

Hiding my face on His coat sleeve, I said, half laughing--laughing,
of course, at myself: "I was not strong enough--was I?--to drink
the cup of martyrdom. I was a failure as a martyr."

How the Master laughed!

"I know better now than to ask--for that cup myself. I shall wait
now for God to give it to me. I shall wait till he finds me ready
to drink it."

"Insha'llah. Perhaps in another way God will give you that cup to
drink, and the capacity for it."

"I hope so." After a pause I continued. "The following Sunday he
preached on 'Renunciation'. This was his text. He said he had just
had a new vision of the power of renunciation. He said that 'when
a soul did the great thing first it inspired others to follow in
the path of sacrifice.' And from that time on his life did change.
He flung caution to the winds and with the utmost courage, in the
face of the strongest opposition from within his church, championed
the cause of the poor, of labour against capital; not in a way to
encourage class hatred, but to promote mutual understanding. In the
pulpit he says such things as these: 'A great new Light is breaking
upon earth. The earth is being enriched and prepared for the birth
of a new humanity. And in the face of this light of Democracy, of
universal sympathy, of the ever-fuller disclosure through science
of the Will of God through the Laws of God, what are you to do with
your miserable little creeds? While humanity marches rapidly
forward

to the Great Brotherhood, we find the Church lagging behind
sociologically, allying itself through fear with the aristocratic
classes. While science is marching on, the Church lags behind
intellectually. And what are the certain consequences of this?
Death for the Church. Something new, something living is coming.
We feel it in the air.'

"One Sunday, my Lord, he even went so far as to mention Thy Name.
'The Bishop,' he said, 'has asked me to preach today on Church
unity, but I wish to consider this subject from the point of view
of the disintegration of the Church. The Church, which, had it
fulfilled the hope of Jesus, would have set the example of
brotherhood to the world, has split into fragments, while outside
it we see great Movements for the Brotherhood of Man, such as the
Baha'i Movement, centred around the Master in 'Akka. With this,
though we may not agree with all it teaches, we must feel sympathy,
since it is not trying to unite the souls on the basis of
disputable facts, but on the basis of universal sympathy. For
supposing the Church did unite, what then would we do with our
brothers the Jews, our brothers the Muslims, our brothers the
Hindus, and our brothers the atheists? Are these to be considered
as outside our body? No! The day has come for the falling of all
barriers: social, national, religious."'

"Good; very good," said the Master, who had been listening with
keen attention. Then He closed His eyes, as He always does when He
sends a message.

"Convey my greetings to him. Say: Miss Juliet has told me all about
your preaching. What you have said lately is very good. It is
exactly so.

"In the time of Jesus the Pharisees lit a lamp in opposition to the
Light of Jesus. Only darkness resulted. But

the Lamp of the Teachings of Jesus afterward became a great flame.
Then it became as a sun and brightened the whole world.

"Such teachings as the people of today have in their hands cannot
stand against the Teachings of Baha'u'llah. Soon the East and the
West will be ablaze with these lights.

"In the lifetime of Jesus eleven disciples became illumined. See
what happened afterward! The whole world became illumined. But in
the lifetime of Baha'u'llah half a million souls became illumined.
From this you can see what will be the result in the future.

"The Teachings of Baha'u'llah no one can deny. If one comes to know
the reality of the Teachings of Baha'u'llah it is impossible to
deny.

"Up to the present time you have been building an edifice on a weak
ground. Now I hope your foundation will be a strong rock, that it
may become an eternal foundation.

"In the time of Jesus thousands of priests laid a foundation, but
their foundation came to naught. But the foundation laid by Peter,
under the Bounty of Jesus, is everlasting--though Peter was but a
fisherman. Then do you lay the same foundation Peter laid, that it
may last forever!"

Joy flooded my soul as He spoke. When He had ended I knelt at His
feet, I kissed the hem of His robe. Divinely He smiled at me.

"I know," I said "Whose Voice is calling him."

"Insha'llah, you will make him a believer."

"Then I have not loved and suffered in vain?"

"Insha'llah, through you," the Master repeated, "he will become a
believer."

Just before dinner Elizabeth Stewart and Lilian Kappes

(on their way to Persia to teach in Dr Moody's school) arrived at
the hotel. The Master, of course, took them down to dinner, placing
them opposite Him at the table and calling me to sit at His side.
Several nations were represented at that table: Persia, America,
France and Russia--for a Russian believer had also just arrived.
And the Master said: "To the refreshing water of the Teachings of
Baha'u'llah come many and various birds from many lands and at
these cooling streams slake their thirst. When the lamp is ignited
the butterflies flutter around the light."

"May we," said Lilian Kappes, "be ready to singe our wings at this
Flame."

"Bravo!" said the Master. "I am very much pleased with your
answer."[85]

In the evening the Master came to my door. Elizabeth and Lilian
were in the room. I was off somewhere for a minute or two. He had
in His hand three flowers. One spray with three blossoms He left
for me. "This is for Juliet," He had said. Later He came back and
brought me a chocolate which He put in my mouth with His own
fingers, as a father might feed His little child. He often brought
chocolates to me. Here is the spray from His hand. (I pressed it
in my diary.)

On Monday, I went away.

__________

(Footnote. 1924. It all happened so suddenly, so bewilderingly.
Looking back now, I see why. I was not mad enough with love in
Thonon. I could be separated from Him.

Knowing that our whole party were His guests at the hotel and being
in such a material condition that I worried about His pocketbook,
I felt I must make some move to go. In 'Akka the Master Himself had
always told us when to go, but being His guest in a very expensive
hotel seemed to me a different situation. Edith had asked me to
come to Vevey on Monday and stay overnight with her and I thought
this might be a sign that my Heavenly Visit in Thonon was over. I
was puzzled and didn't know what to do and decided to consult
Laura. I met her by chance in the upstairs hall just outside the
Master's door and at once plunged into the subject.

"Laura," I said, "the Master is under such heavy expense. Don't you
think I ought to suggest leaving?" And Laura had barely finished
replying, "Perhaps you should, Juliet," when the Master opened His
door and came out.

"Chih miguyad?" (What did she say?) He asked.

Laura explained. And then--His answer fell like a blow, it was so
curt and indifferent.

"Khayli khub." (Very well.) That was all.

But He said something later which, by mistake, was never translated
to me. Edith was to spend Tuesday in Thonon and He said I must come
back with her. Edith herself urged me to do so, but not knowing
that the Master had invited me, I felt that I could not thrust
myself on Him. I thought of several people who had come, unasked,
to see Him at mealtime. I thought of the greedy little children
selling violets and His gentle rebuke to them when they held out
their hands for more francs: "Tell them that they have taken," and
said to myself: I have taken too. So, though it desolated me to see
Edith go without me, back to that Presence which was my Life, I
wouldn't let myself be persuaded.

I sailed with Edith as far as Lausanne and there, in

Lausanne, made another fatal mistake. I bought my ticket for New
York on a boat belonging to an independent line, which meant I
couldn't change to any other line. I thought I had to do this as
my money was running so low and this was the cheapest line and the
first boat leaving Genoa.

Edith had asked me to stay with her one more night, so I went back
to Vevey to wait for her. When she returned she said to me: "I have
something to tell you, Juliet, that will nearly kill you, but you
would rather know than not. The Master expected you today."

To return to Monday--when I went away.

__________

He sent for me early in the morning with Mulk to translate for me.

"Now will you give Me the messages, Juliet?"

I had many and I gave them all. When I mentioned Marion deKay He
said: "Give her My affectionate greeting. She must be educated for
a teacher. She must be taken great care of and treated very well.
Taken great care of," He repeated.

I spoke of dear Silvia Gannett: "She asked me to tell You, my Lord,
of a dream she had lately in which a voice said to her: 'I want you
to serve Me in London.' She felt sure that it was Your voice. But
she never mentioned this dream to me till one day she came to see
me and found me crying, with Your Tablet in my hand and Ahmad's
letter saying that You would be in London at the Races' Congress.
Then, when I explained why I was crying--that Mamma wouldn't let
me travel alone--she told me the dream and that now she saw the
meaning of it: she must go to London with me. But she could only
stay there a very short time, much as she longed to wait till You
came. She had to return home to get married."

The Master, at this, smiled so funnily, for Silvia is seventy-two!
Then He said: "It," (her dream, of course, and her obedience) "is
a sign that she will make progress and that her work in the Cause
will be very good. Tell her it is just as though she had seen Me.
Her journey is accepted as a visit. It will be just as though she
had seen Me, just the same."

In my hand I held a letter from Nancy Sholl with a message in it
for Him.

"Here is something interesting," I said. "Years ago I read a book
by Miss Sholl. It was called The Law of Life, which she proved in
her story to be sacrifice. The book was so spiritual that I longed
to give Miss Sholl the Message, but when I tried to find her I
heard that she lived in Ithaca. Then one day she walked into my
studio with some people who wanted to sublet it--she had moved from
Ithaca to New York--and we have been dear friends ever since. In
this letter she sends You 'the loving greetings of a sincere
seeker.'"

Smiling, the Master seized the letter. "Give her My most
affectionate and loving greeting. Tell her I took her letter away
from you."

He spoke some tender words to me. "I shall see you again," He
concluded. "When the time comes I will write for you."

I realized suddenly that I was going to leave Him. A great wave of
sorrow swept over me. I strained my eyes to His Face: and oh the
blinding Glory there! His Face was a sun and Divine Love blazed
from His eyes. It seemed to me I saw God.

"Always?" He breathed.

"Always, my Lord."

That look was the last. Mulk was called out and this left me alone
with the Master for a moment. I sat at His

feet in silence, my eyes downcast, feeling throughout my whole
being His holy calm and the peace of His Presence.

Then Laura knocked at the door and came in, followed by Hippolyte,
and together they talked of my plans, and, while they were talking,
the Master rose from His chair by the window and with His swift
step left the room.

__________

Still earlier that morning Zillu's-Sultan elder son[86] had come
to visit the Master. After a long private talk with Him, the prince
rushed into Mulk's room threw himself down on the couch and wept
bitterly.

"If only I could be born again," he sobbed, "into any other family
than mine! When I think that my own father has massacred so many
Baha'is; that it was through my grandfather's orders that thousands
of Babis were slaughtered and the Bab Himself executed, I cannot
endure the blood that flows in my veins. If only I could be born
again!"[87]

It was on Wednesday, after those two sweet days with Edith, that
I sailed down the lake to Geneva. Oh Lake of Geneva! To me it is
not earthly at all. Hemmed off from the world by mountains,
ethereal in mist, hallowed by His Sacred Presence, it is like a
vision descended from Heaven. I can scarcely think of it as
permanent, but rather as a shining bit of the immortal world
revealed for the time as His environment.

I have already told of that sail to Geneva: the docking

of the boat at Thonon, which seemed to me a sign that the Master
was drawing me back to Him, since we had to cross the lake and go
out of our course to dock there; how crushed I was when no one
appeared at the landing to meet me; how desperate as the boat moved
away from Thonon and I felt I had lost my last chance to be with
my Lord again; my frantic desire to at least communicate with him
driving me to call Hippolyte the minute I reached my hotel, and
Hippolyte's breath-taking news: that the Master was coming the
following night to Geneva and wished me to get in touch with Edith
and ask her to join me there with Miss Hopkins.

Edith and Miss Hopkins arrived the next day a few hours earlier
than the Master. Miss Hopkins is a very interesting girl: nun-like,
really medieval. One thing she does beautifully is to illumine
parchment cards, like the old missals. We had a happy hour
together; then the two girls went off to rest and I to my balcony
to pray.

Mount Blanc was rosy in the sunset. A diadem of lights encircled
the lake. The mountains on the opposite shore--grizzled, almost
barren, striped with whitish rock--made me think of Palestine.

While we were dining--Edith, Miss Hopkins, and I--at a table facing
the window, we saw the Master's boat approaching. Edith and I
rushed out, but were too late to meet Him on the pier. We met Him
on the street, however, and that seemed so strange: to meet and be
greeted by Him, on a European street. We walked with, or rather
behind Him, to the Hotel de la Paix. His rooms, we found, were on
the same floor as ours, the top floor.

The Master would not take the elevator, but walked up those four
long flights of stairs; really, He floated up the stairs. That
gliding ascent, majestic, of the most

astonishing ease, was almost like a spirit soaring. It made me
think of what Ruha Khanum said to me once in Haifa, that even His
body was different from ours, "of a different fibre," she said.

The Master went straight to His room and Edith and I stood outside
in the hall with the Persians. It is a beautiful hall, square and
white with slender columns and an enormous well down the centre
where the staircase curves to the ground floor. Almost at once the
proprietor came up and there was a little trouble about the rooms,
Hippolyte not being there to arrange and Mulk and the others not
understanding French very well. Edith and I were just moving
forward to translate for them when the Master opened His door and
stepped out into the hall. His mere appearance settled the matter.

"Who is that?" the proprietor asked with a startled look, then
agreed to everything we asked.

I can see the Master now pacing up and down that hall, His hands
behind His back in a way He has, His step firm and royal. I can see
the turbaned head, the calm, noble profile luminous against the
white wall.

After this, the Master went with us into Edith's room and waited
there till His dinner was ready, talking to us tenderly. Suddenly
He turned to me. "Could you go to London, Juliet? Miss Rosenberg
has written inviting you to stay with her."

My heart leapt! Go to London with Him! Then, after all, this was
not the end, this added bounty in Geneva, this merciful bounty
granted to me in place of the lost day in Thonon. But, how could
I prolong my trip? I had almost no money left.

"My Lord," I said, "I should love above all things to go, but my
steamer ticket is bought and I can't exchange

[Photograph of 'Abdu'l-Baha in Paris]

it, as it is on an independent line. And in order to catch the boat
I must leave Geneva tomorrow on the early train. But I could stay
till nine o'clock and try to make some kind of change."

__________

(Footnote. 1924. And here I made my third and most fatal
mistake--always thinking about pocketbooks, even that of the
all-powerful Lord instead of, with perfect trust, leaving
everything in His hands.)

__________

"No," He answered, "it is not necessary. It was just that Miss
Rosenberg wrote. Miss Rosenberg loves you very much. Everybody
loves you and Edith," He added, smiling. Then He asked Edith to
call Miss Hopkins in and this left me alone with Him for a moment.
Looking at me with questioning eyes, He whispered, "Always?"

"Always!"

__________

Dinner over, He sent first for Edith, then for me, to come to His
room. While Edith was with Him I prayed, standing on my balcony.
By now it was dusk. The lights around the lake sparkled like strung
stars. A purpose formed in my mind. Later I understood the real
Source of this impulse.

As I took my place at His feet I said: "Dr Hakim has told me You
weren't served well tonight; that You have eaten almost nothing.
You are hungry I know. Let us go out--Tamaddunu'l-Mulk and I--and
bring You some fruit with our own hands."

He is always thinking for others and to see His appreciation of our
slightest thought for Him, the warm happy love that beams from His
eyes at such times, is unbearably touching. But He would not let
us get anything.

"No, no," He said. "No thank you. I was beautifully served. There
was chicken, and many other things to come. I was too tired to
eat--that was all."

"What have you to ask, Juliet?"

"That I may always see Thy Face. To see it will protect me from
temptation."

"You must always see it. There must be no temptation." Then He,
Himself introduced my next subject! "I do not," He said, "want to
make you angry"--at which I looked up at Him laughing--"I do not
want to hurt you, Juliet. But I must tell you something."

I knew what was coming. I pressed His hand.

"Don't think I am going to ask you to marry Mr Remey. Even if you
wished to do so now, I would not wish it. But about Dr Grant ..."
Then in a marvellous way He analyzed Percy Grant's character and
the nature, even the history of our attachment, taking my breath
away by His perfect knowledge of the whole thing.

"But, my Lord, isn't it true that he has other qualities--for
example, his courage and his force--that would make him a wonderful
servant of the Cause?"

"Ah, that is another affair," said the Master. "I am thinking now
of your future."

"Some men," He went on, "are like this. They do not wish to marry
and they love the love of women, and should you let this continue,
it will go on forever in the same way until in the end he leaves
you. Besides, meantime you may fall into difficulty. It is often
by just such a thing that a black line is drawn across a girl's
character. Now when you return to New York, Juliet, you must end
this. Either you must marry him or separate yourself from him, cut
yourself entirely from him. Understand, I

do not wish to separate you. I wish you to marry him. But I want
the present state of things to end.

"I am speaking to you in this way because I love you so much. I
love you very much; therefore I say these things to you.

"If you should marry him it may be good for the Cause--you may give
him the Message--or, it may not be good. I do not care about this.
I am thinking of your happiness."

"Ask the Master," I said to Tamaddunu'l-Mulk, "to tell me His Will
and whatever it is I will do it, for I love His Will. I love
following it. I intended to speak of this tonight. I intended to
say: I am ready now to put Dr Grant out of my life."

"No, no," answered the Master. "You must understand that I do not
want to separate you. I want you to marry him. It is My wish that
you marry him. When you go back can you not say to him: 'We must
end this in one of two ways. If you love me, marry me. There is no
obstacle. If not, I must cut myself from you.'"

"Oh my Lord," I said, hiding my face on His knee, "how could I say
that to him? I should be ashamed to."

I had never refused the Master anything before, but I quailed at
the thought of proposing to Percy Grant!

__________

(Footnote. 1947. I hate to copy these idiotic words: "I had never
refused the Master anything before." And on top of all my
protestations that I loved His Will! Who on earth was I to "refuse
the Master?" The awful impudence of it! The unconscious complacency
of that comment was much worse than what I did.

__________

"Then cannot your mother say it for you?"

"She won't even speak to him."

"Have you no friend who can take this message?"

"No. And besides: oh my Lord, how could I force him?"

"But you are not a child. And you must think of your future. Many
men have wished to marry you."

"But, my Lord, I have no desire to marry."

"But I want you to marry, if not Dr Grant, then some other.
Otherwise, when you are older you will fall into great misery. You
can paint now; you are young, but you must think of your future,
my daughter." His fatherly tenderness touched me to the heart.

"But it would be very difficult to marry a man I didn't love."

"That is the way with everyone," He said.

"My Lord," I asked, "mightn't I stay away from him--stop going to
his church, refuse his invitations, refuse to see him when he
comes?"

"Perhaps," and He made a laughing comment on human nature. "But,"
returning to His first suggestions, (with anxiety, it seemed to me,
for He glanced from side to side as though He, Himself, were
looking for a messenger) "is there no one to take him this word:
marriage or separation?"

"No, but if You wish, my Lord, I will do it myself."

"I leave that in your hands, only do something to make him realize
... See," He said, "how much I love you! I have come to Geneva to
tell you this and have stayed up so late" (it was nearly midnight)
"talk to you about it."

__________

(Footnote. I wish I could write everything He said that night. At
times He was so comic about poor Percy's character that I couldn't
help laughing with Him. When

you are in His Presence nothing really matters except the eternal
things.)

__________

He looked very tired, and my heart smote me. How we accept His
sacrifices, as if this immortal, universal King belonged just to
us!

"Is there anything else you wish to ask, Juliet?"

"Only to say once more that I long to forever fix in my mind Thy
Face. This will keep me firm and steadfast, desiring nothing but
Thee."

"When your heart is perfectly pure and your love for Me increasing,
then you shall see My Face."

"Come and knock at My door in the morning," He said.

"But I must leave so early. I must take the six-fifty train."

"Come whenever you are dressed. I shall be up."

__________

Edith woke me at dawn. The horizon was crimson, the lake in its rim
of dark mountains, a crystal mirror.

I went to the Master alone. In His exquisite thoughtfulness He had
left the door ajar. I knelt at His feet. A great flood of sorrow
rose in me.

"Don't cry!" said His tender voice and I felt His delicate, vital
fingers wiping the tears from my eyes. I felt my heart suddenly at
peace, as though He had laid His Power upon it and checked that
uprising storm of wild grief.

"Always?" He asked.

"Always!" After a moment I added in Persian: "I shall be with You
always."

In English He replied, and none but the Comforter

Himself could speak in such a tone: "With Me--always." Off the
coast of Spain

Here in my cabin alone on this queer little ship I am fortifying
myself for what lies before me in New York. I stay all day in my
cabin, to avoid the people, and pray and write. To none of these
people could I give the Message, nor anything else, in fact.

Always I seek the Master's Face. Sometimes He dawns on me in
immortal glory and sometimes He smiles at me. Only through service,
only through prayer, only through obedience shall I climb to His
Presence and live in it "always".

I went to Thonon, not to find Him there, but to find Him
afterwards. I have not yet found Him, except for brief moments. In
the anguish before me, in the deprivation, in the "Heaven of
Poverty": there shall I find Him.

I have been curiously stripped on this journey. Through the
chivalry of an idealist who offered to help me at the customs, I
lost my trunk. In Naples I lost my fountain pen; somewhere, my
prayer book--even my prayer book! I have just the clothes on my
back, nothing else. This diary, with my book of Tablets (the
Master's Tablets to me) and the 'Akka diary, I have been carrying
in a little bag, and thank God these are safe.

There is the dinner bell. I must go and sit with these funny
people, who ply their toothpicks so vigorously (which makes me
horribly sick) and accuse me of "seeing angels".

"I no want you see angels," said a fiery musician to

me yesterday. "I want you" (pounding his chest) "to see me."

So I fly to my cabin and bolt my door.

8 September 1911

My struggle began today. Peace went. Standing at the bow of the
boat just now, the salt wind in my face, the sea rough with
whitecaps, I realized many things.

I have been more anxious to lead Percy Grant to the Kingdom than
to be led there myself. I have counted more on eternal union with
him than on eternal union with God. I have never been able to
disentangle my love for the Cause from my love for him, or from my
hopes and desires for him and myself--my future with him.

Now I must cut these two loves apart. But how? Nearing New York

15 September 1911. Morning.

A captive, fettered by mine own desire, Yet with a soul that panted
to be free, Yet with a heart on fire For Him who freeth all
captivity. Suppliant, I knelt before His Prison door. The latch is
lifted and wide flung the door! Behold the amazing Glory of His
Face! Veils, veils of Light, no more, These mortal eyes discern in
His strange grace. I cry: "O Mystery, Grant that I see!"

With tender fingers quickening in their touch, Gently He wiped away
mine unshed tears. "O thou," He breathed, "who lovest much, Await
the sure unfolding of the years, The vision purified Through hope
denied." The years unfolded, while a heavenly rain Of tears washed
ever clearer my dim sight. Suppliant I knelt again, Unfettered now,
before the Eternal Light. "Accept the heart I bring To Thee, O
King!" I lift mine eyes to His Divinity, Eyes streaming now with
tears of love alone. God! What is this I see? For veils of night
and veils of Light are gone, Melted--torn--burned away In flaming
Day. Haloed with rays, encircled as with fire, The clouds of earth
rolled back, in ambient space, Eyes as two stars of living fire,
Clearly I see the Christ--the Eternal Face-- The Father in the Son,
The One--the ONE!

Nearer New York

15 September 1911

"Always for Me, always for Me!" Ah, Whose the Voice that stirs the
night In a chant sweeping in from Eternity Like the sighing wind
o'er a boundless sea, "My heaven, My soul, My light! Thy heart for
Me, thy breast for Me, Always for Me, always for Me! Thine eyes for
Me, thy brow for Me, Always for Me! Thy soul for Me, thy spirit for
Me, Always for Me, always for Me! Thy blood for Me--thy blood for
Me, Thy blood for Me!" "Always for Thee, always for Thee," My heart
to the Heavenly Wooer sings. "Sever my heart, my mind, mine eye
From the mortal vanishing things! Lift me above the earth-desire,
Higher and higher, higher and higher To the placeless pyre of
undying fire, The love of the King of Kings! And on Thine earth
where Thy footstep rings Pour out my blood in Thy hallowed Way,
That mortals, the red sign following, May attain to the Fount of
Day. Always for Thee, always for Thee! On through the worlds of
Eternity To the endless end no eye can see, The bird of fire to the
Burning Tree! On, on to the beat of tireless wings-- Always for
Thee!"

This last little one I wrote after I left 'Akka, in 1909: O King
of Kings, O King of Kings! My heart it is Thy quivering lyre. Thy
vital fingers sweep its strings, Sweep its strings, sweep its
strings. Its strings are set afire, my Lord, Its strings are set
afire! Oh kindled by divine desire, For Thee it sings, for Thee it
sings, Forevermore for Thee it sings, This heart that is Thy lyre,
my Lord, This heart that is thy lyre!

15 September 1911

I am approaching New York--and my ordeal. But, thank God, I have
been gathering strength. This week has been one of such frightful
storm that I haven't been able to write a word. But, through the
storm, the more brightly shone His Face. 48 West Tenth Street

2 October 1911

I love this dear little house. It is very simple and old-fashioned
in an old-fashioned street. It looks like the homes of my
childhood, only more simple and therefore more lovely. And yet, how
it complicates the problem with which I have returned to live in
it, since it is almost opposite the house of Percy Grant. Strange,
to be moved so close to him by something outside my own

will at this of all moments, when I must separate myself from him.
I say "outside my own will," for I didn't choose this house; it
came as the result of prayer. We tried for weeks and weeks and
couldn't find a house in a neighbourhood to suit Mamma. Then one
morning I got on my knees and prayed and, just a little later in
the morning, Marjorie and I, on our way to Greenwich Village, saw
the sign "For Rent" on 48 West Tenth Street and Mamma approved of
this neighbourhood!

23 November 1911

O Handmaiden of God!

The news of your trouble and difficulty on the way caused Us great
sorrows. In truth the trouble was very hard to bear. I hope you may
receive a great reward for it. The cause of this trouble and
difficulty was that for the love of seeing that unkind person you
made great haste to go.

Remember My advices. Find a friend whose heart is yours, but not
one who has a thousand hearts (affections). Think of God's Will,
because God is the most kind.

Upon you be the Glory of God.

(signed) Abdul Baha Abbas

[P.S.] I send you a small sum of money.

I shall never forget the awful moment when I read this Tablet. "For
the love of seeing that unkind person you made great haste to
go."(!) Every morning after that I awoke with these words ringing
in my ears: "You made great haste to go."

My first thought was: "How can it be true?" So unconscious are we
of our own real condition. Then I looked deep into my heart. Yes,
it was true. I was always saying to myself in Thonon: "When I
return to New York I will tell Percy this, I will tell him that."
I looked forward to that return with excitement for it meant
beginning a new life in a new home opposite his. I started back
happily, to be overtaken at Geneva by the Master and His stern
command: "Marry Dr Grant, or leave him. Cut yourself entirely from
him."

Oh that pause at Geneva! I can see the Master now, the unexpected
Visitor, leading Edith and me up those four flights of stairs to
the Upper Chamber. I can see Him floating before us, the Being from
worlds above Who has lit upon earth for a brief time.

"You made great haste to go." How blind I have been and how I have
lost through my blindness. But for my stubborn attachment I might
have spent weeks in Europe with Him, in Paris and London. For the
"small sum of money" was the most pointed of signs that I could
easily have given up my passage on "the independent line." It was
$120: exactly the cost of the ticket.

I had not written to the Master of my "difficulties" on the way.
Only to Mulk had I mentioned these trifles--the seven days of
storm, the temporary loss of my trunk--for I got it again after
nine weeks. Yet in the midst of His great pressure of work He had
hastened to write me, to express His tender sympathy for my little
inconveniences, to open my eyes to their real cause, my so
persistent attachment--and, at this insecure moment, as I begin my
"new life" opposite the house of Percy Grant--to repeat His warning
at Geneva. How vigilant is God's watchfulness over His least
creature!

Diary of Juliet Thompson: Chapter 4 Chapter 3 Notes

'Abdu'l-Baha in America

25 March to 7 December 1912

To the attracted maid-servant of God, Juliet Thompson.

HE IS GOD!

O thou candle of the Love of God!

Thy numerous letters were received. According to the promise, by
the Will of God, I shall embark on the boat 25 March and in the
latter part reach Naples, where I shall stay a few days and from
thence start for New York.

Verily, this is great glad tidings. Upon thee by Baha'u'l-Abha.
(signed) Abdul Baha Abba. Translated in the Orient.

New York

Twelve o'clock, 25 March 1912

It is just midnight. TODAY the Master sails for America. I feel His
Presence strongly.

__________

Received March 25:

The Church of the Ascension. 5 Avenue and 10th Street.

23 March

My dear Juliet:

I understand that Abdul Baha is to arrive in New York 10
April--that is, in Easter week,--so that the 14 April would be his
first Sunday in New York.

If his friends in this city would feel any value or assistance in
having him speak at the eleven o'clock service in the Church of the
Ascension, in place of my sermon, I shall be more than happy to
invite him to the Ascension pulpit in my place. I should like to
show so important and splendid a person, and those who love him,
whatever hospitality and goodwill can be expressed in this town,
by such a plan.

If, however, his coming in the middle of the week means that he
ought to get more quickly into public contact with the city, which
may well be the case if his stay is brief, then I would offer the
Church of the Ascension to the committee in charge of his affairs
to

have any kind of service they please, in the daytime or evening,
between his arrival, let us say 10 April--and the following Sunday.

That is to say I make one of two propositions: to offer him my
pulpit Sunday, 14 April, at eleven a.m., or to offer the Church,
unhampered by any form of service, between the tenth and the
fourteenth.

Faithfully,

(signed) Percy S. Grant

__________

What will obedience bring forth, if half-obedience brings forth
this? I have refused all winter to see Percy Grant.

I wrote thanking him and asking him to get in touch with the
committee of arrangements, Mr Mills and Mr MacNutt.

__________

The Church of the Ascension. 5 Avenue and 10th Street.

28 March 1912

My dear Juliet:

I thank you for your nice letter about Abdul Baha. Whatever may
seem most agreeable to those having the matter in charge will be
altogether satisfactory to me.

Whatever I can do I hope you will allow me to do, to honour such
a distinguished visitor from the East--one so loved by my friends.

Believe me to be faithfully yours,

(signed) Percy S. Grant

8 April 1912

Little did I dream when I began this diary what I would write in
its closing pages! This morning I telephoned Percy.

"This is Juliet."

"Ah, Juliet."

"I want to tell you two things. First, 'Abdu'l-Baha is on the
Cedric and will arrive Wednesday morning. And--is your time very
full Thursday? For I think He will send for you almost at once."

"Wait. Let me get my card, Juliet. No, I have no engagements for
Thursday, except in the evening, and could come any time during the
day to see Him. I am very happy. I shall be very glad to see the
Master, Juliet."

"As soon as He arrives, someone will let you know."

I then brought up the second thing.

"I'd like to explain something," I said. "Has Dr Guthrie got into
touch with you?"

"No."

"Then I hardly need to explain. But it was this: Charles James had
heard some rumour that the Master was to speak in your church. He
mentioned this to Dr Guthrie, who immediately wanted to offer his
church, too. This morning a letter came from Dr Guthrie inviting
the Master to speak on the night of the fourteenth. I tell you all
this really to say that it was not through me Dr Guthrie heard of
your plans."

"I am a very easy person, Juliet, in misunderstandings."

"I know that."

"And I am glad Dr Guthrie has made the same offer that I have."

"No one has made the same offer you have."

It was then he repeated something he had said to Mr MacNutt; I
can't remember just what.

"That was beautiful of you," I answered.

"No, it was not. And Juliet: I don't want you to feel that this is
a favour. I want you to feel--to understand--that you have a
proprietary interest in the church: a proprietary interest; that
it is yours to give. The church is yours. The Parish House is
yours. The Rectory is yours.[88] We will ask the Master to the
Rectory and form little groups to meet Him. I don't want to bore
you, Juliet," (oh imagine him boring me!) "but I want you to feel
that it is yours, this house. Here it is, just at the end of the
street. Ask anyone to the Rectory, anyone you wish. You may
eliminate the Rector, if you would rather not have me here ..."
This and much more. He contradicted that last statement once. "I
want you," he said, with his appealing boyishness, "to come around
me again, Juliet." His voice broke. He stammered a little and
ended. "I am a tongue-tied person when it comes to strong feeling."

"I should like," I said, "to take you by the hand and lead you to
the Master myself."

"I want you to, Juliet. I don't want to do it any other way. I want
you to be there. I don't want to do it without you."

"Then we will meet on Thursday. We will see each other on Thursday
in His Presence. I think it will be beautiful to meet there."

"It will be the north and the south in His Presence, Juliet."

"The Master has loved you a long time, Percy, for your work."

"Some people say they are loved for their enemies, Juliet. If I am
loved, it is for my friends."

10 April 1912. 11:15 p.m.

Tomorrow He comes! Who comes? "Who is this that cometh from
Bozrah?"

This is a night of holy expectation. The air is charged with
sanctity. I can almost hear the Gloria in Excelsis.

How close He is tonight! Is it His prayers I feel? Why has earth
become suddenly divine?

Midnight

The Master comes TODAY!

11 April 1912

Oh day of days!

I was wakened this morning while it was yet dark by something
shining into my eyes. It was a ray from the moon, its waning
crescent framed low in my windowpane.

Symbol of the Covenant, was my first thought. How perfectly
beautiful to be wakened today by it! But at once I remembered
another time when I had seen the

waning moon hanging, then, above palm trees. I was on the roof of
the House in 'Akka with the Master and Munavvar Khanum. The Master
was pointing to the moon. "The East. The moon. No!" He said. "I am
the Sun of the West."

At dawn, kneeling at my window, I prayed in the swelling light for
all this land, now sleeping, that it would wake to received its
Lord; conscious, as I prayed, of an overshadowing Sacred Presence:
a great, glorious, burning Presence--the Sun of Love rising. This
fiery dawn was but a pale symbol of such a rising.

Between seven and eight I went to the pier with Marjorie Morten and
Rhoda Nichols. The morning was crystal clear, sparkling. I had a
sense of its being Easter: of lilies, almost seen, blooming at my
feet.

All the believers of New York had gathered at the pier to meet the
Master's ship. Marjorie and I had suggested to them that the Master
might not want this public demonstration, but their eagerness was
too great to be influenced by just two, and so we had gone along
with them--only too glad to do so, to tell the truth.

During the morning the harbour misted over. At last, in the mist
we saw: a phantom ship! And at that very moment some newsboys ran
through the crowd, waving Extras. "The Pope is dead! The Pope is
dead!" they shouted. The Pope was not dead. The Extras had been
printed only on a rumour; but what a symbol, and how exactly timed!

Closer and closer, ever more substantial, came that historic ship,
that epoch-making ship, till at last it swam out solid into the
light, one of the Persians sitting in the bow in his long robes,
'aba, and turban. This was Siyyid

Asadu'llah, a marvellous, witty old man, who had come with the
Master to prepare His meals.

He told us later that when the ship was approaching the harbour and
the Master saw, as His first view of America, the Wall Street
skyscrapers, He had laughed and said: "Those are the minarets of
the West."[89] What divine irony!

The ship docked, but the Master did not appear. Suddenly I had a
great glimpse. In the dim hall beyond the deck, striding to and fro
near the door, was One with a step that shook you! Just that one
stride, charged with power, the sweep of a robe, a majestic head,
turban crowned--that was all I saw, but my heart stopped.

Marjorie's instinct and mine had been true. Mr Kinney was called
for to come on board the ship. He returned with a disappointing
message. The Master sent us His love but wanted us to disperse now.
He would meet us all at the Kinneys' house at four.

Everyone obeyed at once except Marjorie, Rhoda, and myself!
Marjorie, who loves the Teachings but has never wholly accepted
them, said: "I can't leave till I've seen Him. I can't. I WON'T!"
So, though we followed the crowd to the street, we slipped away
there and looked around for some place to hide. Quite a distance
below the big entrance to the pier we saw a fairly deep embrasure
into which a window was set, with the stone wall jutting out from
it. Here we flattened ourselves against the window, Rhoda (who is
conspicuously tall) clasping a long white box of lilies which she
had brought for the Master. Just in front of the entrance stood
Mr.

Mills' car, his chauffeur in it. Suddenly it rolled forward and,
to our utter dismay, parked directly in front of us. Now we were
caught: certain to be discovered. But there was no help for it, for
Marjorie still refused to budge till she had seen the Master.

Then, He came--through the entrance with Mr MacNutt and Mr Mills,
and turned and walked swiftly toward the car. In a panic we waited.

A few nights ago Marjorie and I had a double dream. In her dream,
I was out in space with her. In mine, we were in a room together
and the Master had just entered it. He walked straight up to
Marjorie, put His two hands on her shoulders and pressed and
pressed till she sank to her knees. And while she was sinking, she
lifted her face to His and everything in her seemed to be dying
except her soul, which looked out through her raised eyes in a sort
of agony of recognition.

Today, after one glance at the Master, this was just the way she
looked.

"Now," she said, "I know."

As the Master was stepping into the car, He turned and--smiled at
us.

__________

We met Him in the afternoon at the Kinneys'. When I arrived with
Marjorie, He was sitting in the centre of the dining room near a
table strewn with flowers. He wore a light pongee 'aba. At His
knees stood the Kinney children, Sanford and Howard, and His arms
were around them. He was very white and shining. No words could
describe His ineffable peace. The people stood about in rows and
circles: several hundred in the big rooms, which all open into each
other. In the dining room many sat on the floor, Marjorie and I
included. We

[Photograph: 'Abdu'l-Baha holding a child.]

made a dark background for His Glory. Only our tears reflected Him,
and almost everyone there was weeping just at the sight of Him. For
at last we saw divinity incarnate. Divinely He turned His head from
one child to the other, one group to another. I wish I could
picture that turn of the head--an oh, so tender turn, with that
indescribable heavenly grace caught by Leonardo da Vinci in his
Christ of the Last Supper (in the study for the head)--but in
'Abdu'l-Baha irradiated by smiles and a lifting of those eyes
filled with glory, which even Leonardo, for all his mystery, could
not have painted. The very essence of compassion, the most poignant
tenderness is in that turn of the head.

The next morning early the Master telephoned me (that is, Ahmad[90]
telephoned for Him) and nearly every morning after. Can you imagine
the sweetness of that--to be wakened every morning by a word from
Him? Sometimes He just inquired how I was, but often He called me
to Him.

When I first went to see Him He asked me only one question. "How
is your mother?"

"Not very well, my Lord."

"What is the matter?"

"She is grieving." And I told Him why. My brother is soon to be
married to a quite beautiful, brilliant girl who, however, doesn't
want to make friends with his family!

"Bring your mother to Me," He said. "I will comfort her."

He sent for her that very night. I was terribly afraid she wouldn't
go--she has been so opposed to my work in the

Cause--and Ahmad called up in the midst of a thunderstorm! But when
I took the message to her--that the Master wished her to come to
Him now--she jumped up from her chair and began to scurry around.

"Just wait till I get my rubbers," she said.

We found Him exhausted, lying on His bed. He had seen hundreds of
people that day, literally, at a big reception and in His own
rooms. Mamma, who is very shy and undemonstrative, rushed to the
bedside and fell on her knees.

"Welcome, welcome!" said the Master. "You are very welcome, Mrs
Thompson.

"You must be very thankful for your daughter. Praise be to God, she
is a daughter of the Kingdom. If she were an earthly daughter, of
what use would she be to you? At best she could do you a little
material good. But she is a heavenly daughter, a daughter of the
Kingdom. Therefore she is the means of drawing your soul nearer to
God. Her value to you is not apparent now. When one possesses a
thing its value is not realized. But you will realize later. Mary
Magdalene was but a villager; she was even scorned by the people,
but now her name moves the whole earth, and in the Kingdom of God
she is very near. Your daughter is kind to you. If your son is
faithless, she is faithful. She will become dearer and dearer to
you. She will take the place of your son. But in the end your son
will be very good. This is only temporary.

"I became very grieved today when, upon inquiring for you, I heard
of your sorrow. And now I want to comfort you. Trust in God. God
is kind. God is faithful. God never forgets you. If others are
unkind what difference does it make when God is kind? When God is
on your

side it does not matter what men do to you. But your son will be
good in the end.

"God is kind to you. And I am going to be kind to you. And I am
faithful!"

Mamma, still on her knees, bent and kissed His hand. "Tell the
Master," she said to Ahmad, "I have always loved Him. Lua knows
that." (If Lua knew, I certainly didn't.)

"I have no need of a witness," the Master answered, so tenderly.
"My heart knows."

The next day Mamma said to me: "All my bitterness has gone. The
Master must be helping me."[91]

It was on Saturday, 13 April, that Mamma and I visited the Master.
On Friday He had called me early, asking me to meet Him at the
MacNutts'.

I shall never cease to see Him as He looked speaking from their
stairway, standing below a stained glass window in a ray of
sunlight, the powerful head, the figure in its flowing robes,
outlined in light.

The Master has a strange quality of beautifying His environment,
of throwing a glamour over it and blotting out the ugly. The
MacNutts' house is ugly; the one redeem-

ing feature of that stairway, its window. All I saw as the Master
stood there was Himself, the window, the ray of light. His words
lifted my soul on wings!

In the evening Friday He spoke in Miss Phillips' studio. The
enormous room was packed. At his dear invitation I sat [on] His
right (I suppose because I had given Miss Phillips the Message);
Marjorie at His left near Him. In the simple setting of that
studio, its overhead light filling the deep forms of His face with
shadow, He looked ruggedly, powerfully beautiful. His words I will
not give. They have been kept.[92]

The very day He arrived, Thursday, the Master sent for Percy Grant,
but He appointed Friday to see him, in the afternoon. I was not
invited to the interview, so in spite of the happy arrangement
Percy and I had made, I knew I should have to stay away. Nor was
I told very much about it, only that the Master had planned with
Dr Grant to accept his church for Sunday (the fourteenth) for His
first address in New York, choosing the Church of the Ascension out
of thirteen other--and some of the clergy had even wired to
Gibraltar offering their pulpits for that date! And one other very
little thing (Mr MacNutt himself gave me this scrap of news): as
he was standing with Dr Grant at the elevator after leaving the
Master's suite, Dr Grant said to him: "You can't help but love the
old gentleman."

To me Percy put it more elegantly: "The Master compels one's love
and esteem. What He radiates is peace and love."

[Photograph: 'Abdu'l-Baha in New York in the garden of Howard
MacNutt, 1912.]

Saturday, 13 April, the Master spoke at Marjorie Morten's.[93]
Again, because of the crowd, He spoke from the stairway, dominating
all the beauty of Marjorie's long drawing room, with its rich
colour and carvings and masterly paintings, by His superlative
beauty.

His theme that day was the spiritual seasons, and in the midst of
His talk a delicious thing happened which, slight though it was,
I want to keep. In its very slightness it may draw the people of
the future closer to the Master, just as it drew us.

These tender little touches of His humour and simplicity, bridging
for the moment the infinite space between us and His pure
Perfection, making His Divinity accessible: how precious, how
heavenly sweet they are, of what unique value! The disciples of
Christ, looking beyond that awful chasm of the crucifixion into the
mystery of their days with Him, were, I suppose, awed into silence
about the little things--the adorable little things. So the Man of
sorrow has been just the Man of sorrow to us. We have never formed
any conception of the Man of love and joy, great buoyant joy; a
Christ whose Love overflowed into little tendernesses and Whose joy
overflowed into fun and wit--a happy, smiling, laughing Christ. And
yet I am sure He was that.

But now to tell of this small thing. With His celestial eloquence
the Master had described the spiritual springtime.

"Va tabistan," He began and paused for Ahmad to translate.

Dead silence. Poor Ahmad had lost the English word.

But while he stood helpless, the Master supplied it Himself.

"Summer!" He laughed. Whereupon a little ripple of delight ran
through the audience. His charm had captured them all.

After the meeting He went up to rest in Mr Morten's room. He had
seen a hundred and forty people that morning and was so worn out
at the end of His talk that He looked almost ill. His fatigue was
apparent to everyone--and yet the people had no pity. When I
returned from an errand to the kitchen, literally hundreds were
streaming toward His room; a dozen were in the room; in the hall
were many peering faces, and climbing up the stairs--a procession!

"Oh can't we shut the door?" I asked Dr Farid. But the Master heard
me.

"Let them come now," He said gently.

A mother with a baby stood near the door. The Master took the baby
from her and tenderly pressed it to His heart. "Beautiful baby!
Little chicken!" He said in His dear English; then explained that
"little chicken" was the Turkish pet name for child.

A young single-taxer[94] began to question Him. "What message shall
I take to my friends?" he ended.

"Tell them," laughed the Master (that wonderful spicy humour in His
face) "to come into the Kingdom of God. There they will find plenty
of land and there are no taxes on it."

Sunday. Oh, Sunday!

At the Master's own invitation I met Him at the Rectory, a half
hour before the service.

As Miss Barry was holding her Sunday school class downstairs, we
were invited upstairs, to the back room on the second floor. There,
with the Master and the Persians and Edward Getsinger, I waited in
supreme happiness. Very soon Percy came in. Approaching the Master,
he bent his head reverently.

"In New Testament language," he said, "this would be called an
upper chamber."[95]

The Master smiled sweetly and took his hand.

After he left, the Master turned to me. "This is a dish you have
cooked for Me, Juliet," He laughed.

"I hope it is cooked all the way through!"

"Insha'llah," smiled the Master.

"I have more dishes to serve to You when You are rested," I
ventured.

"I hope they are light," He replied, "and will rest easily on My
digestion. Most of these dishes are so heavy!"

I inquired for dear Ruha Khanum, who has been very ill.

"I have put her in the hands of the Blessed Perfection," said our
Lord, "and now I don't worry at all."

He spoke of my mother very lovingly.

"Tell her to trust in God," He repeated. "Tell her that God is
faithful. Read the Hidden Words to her."

The time came to go to the church. The Persians, Edward Getsinger,
and I went first: marching in, as Percy had planned it, with the
processional, bringing up the rear of the processional! For nearly
a year I hadn't once entered the Church of the Ascension; and now,
what a very surprising return!

The Master waited in the vestry-room.

When I try to express the perfection of that service--I mean, the
arrangement of it--I can find no words. It was the conception of
an artist, of a true poet. The altar and the whole chancel were
banked with calla lilies. On the back of the Bishop's chair hung
a victor's wreath, an exact reproduction of the Greek victor's
wreath, classically simple: a small oval of laurel with its leaves
free at the top. Its meaning went to my heart.

Dr Grant read first a prophecy from the Old Testament pointing
directly to this Day, to Baha'u'llah; then the thirteenth Chapter
of Corinthians. These were not the lessons for the day but
specially chosen.

At the end of the Second Lesson, just as the choir began to sing
in a great triumphant outburst "Jesus Lives!" 'Abdu'l-Baha with
that step of His, which has been described as the walk of either
a shepherd or a king, entered the chancel, "suddenly come to His
Temple!" Percy Grant had quietly left his seat and gone into the
vestry-room and had returned with the Master, holding His hand. For
a moment they stood at the altar beneath that fine mural, The
Resurrection by John La Farge; then with beautiful deference Percy
led the Master to the Bishop's chair. (This broke the nineteenth
canon of the Episcopal Church, which forbids the unbaptized to sit
behind the altar rail!)

The prayers over, Dr Grant made a short introductory address,
speaking not from the pulpit but the chancel steps. Never shall I
forget what I saw then. Percy, strong and erect, with his
magnificently set head ("like the head of some Viking" as Howard
MacNutt says), giving, with a fire even greater than usual--with
a strange, sparkling magnetism--the Baha'i Message to his congre-

gation; and behind him: a flashing Face, unlike the face of any
mortal, haloed by the victor's wreath, visibly inspiring him. For
with every flash from those eyes, which were fixed on Dr Grant,
would appear a fresh charge of energy in him. There was something
wonderfully rhythmic in this transmission of fire to the words and
the delivery of the man speaking. Was it the sign of some
susceptibility in this hitherto unyielding man to the power of
'ABDU'L-BAHa? Or was it just that Power: transcendent,
irresistible, quickening whom it chose?

"May the Lord lift the light of His Countenance upon you." Ah, what
happens when the Lord does!

How can I tell of that moment when the Master took the place of
Percy Grant on the chancel steps? When, standing in His flowing
robes there, He turned His unearthly Face to the people and
said:[96] "Dr Grant has just read from the thirteenth Chapter of
Corinthians that the day would come when you would see face to
face."

It was too great to put into words; it was almost too great to
bear. The pain of intense rapture pierced my heart. Could the
people fail to recognize? Oh, had they recognized what would He not
have revealed to them? But He could go no further. He swerved to
another subject.

"I have come hither," He said, "to find that material civilization
has progressed greatly, but the spiritual civilization has been
left behind. The material civilization is likened unto the glass
of a lamp chimney. The spiritual civilization is like the light in
that chimney. The material civilization should go hand-in-hand with

the spiritual civilization. Material civilization may be likened
unto a beautiful body, while spiritual civilization is the spirit
that enters the body and gives to it life. With the propelling
power of spiritual civilization the result will be greater.

"His Holiness Jesus Christ came to this world that the people might
have through Him the civilization of Heaven, a spirit of oneness
with God. He came to breathe the spirit into the body of the world.
There must be oneness in the world of man. When this takes place
we will have the Most Great Peace.

"Today the body politic needs the oneness of the world and
universal peace. But to spread the feeling of peace and firmly
implant it in the minds of men a certain propelling Power is
required.

"It is self-evident that spiritual civilization cannot be
accomplished through material means, for the interests of the
various nations differ. It is self-evident that it cannot be
accomplished through patriotism, for countries differ in their
ideas of patriotism. It is impossible save through spiritual power.
Compared with this all other means are too weak to bring about
universal peace.

"Man has two wings: his material power and development, and his
spiritual understanding and achievements. With one wing alone he
cannot fly. Therefore, no matter how far material civilization
advances, without the other, great things cannot be accomplished.
... Humanity, generally speaking, is immersed in a sea of
materiality ..."

Dr Grant asked the Master to give the benediction. Apparently He
gave no blessing but asked for one for us.

Against His high background of lilies He stood, His face uplifted
in prayer, His eyes closed, the palms of His

hands uplifted. I seemed to feel streams of Life descending,
filling those cupped hands. On either side of Him knelt the
clergymen, facing the altar. Percy Grant's head was bowed low. It
was a breathless moment. Then the Master raised His resonant voice
and chanted.

The recessional hymn was "Christ our Lord has risen again."

How can words tell what I realized, or thought I realized, at that
incomparable service?

This church had been my cross for years, from which I had never
been able to escape--though twice I had made the attempt, twice
wrenching myself away, only to be guided back by what seemed to me
in each instance the clear Will of God, expressed through a
striking miracle. Guided back to mortal pain. Was I seeing, this
morning, divine results of this pain?

And not only had I suffered more vitally here than in any other
place, prayed more passionately; not only had it been the scene of
my deepest inner conflict, but the cause of all this had been
dramatically enacted here. Here in this pulpit, with all his great
force, his disturbing magnetism and the fire of his eloquence,
Percy Grant had opposed my unshakeable belief, thundering
denunciations of "the subtle", "the Machiavellian Oriental" (God
forgive me for quoting this)--of the slumbering and superstitious
Orient--the Orient that brought to the West "nothing but disease
and death"--determined to conquer this Faith of mine which made me
resistant to him. He had even gone so far as to openly name "the
Baha'i sect" in his pulpit and to warn his flock against it.

And now, framing that matchless head of the Master, who sat there
so still in His Glory, hung the victor's

wreath! Oh for words vivid and sublime enough to make you see Him
sitting there, in the very spot where He had been so violently
denied!

The Master took me back into the Rectory, into the big, dark front
room. Percy rushed in for a moment, still in his surplice, his
cheeks flushed, his eyes very bright and blue.

"Juliet," he called, looking in from the dining room, "ask if the
Master wants anything: tea, coffee, water--anything; then tell
Thomas" (the butler).

But the Master wanted nothing except to wait to see Dr Grant (who
was being detained in the church) and He filled me with
indescribable joy by inviting me to wait with Him, sitting beside
Him.

I sat there, happier it seemed to me than I had ever been in my
life. I was in the Presence of my Lord, and the one I loved best
in all this human world had at last recognized Him. For what else
had that exquisite service meant, with the Resurrection stressed
all through it? Such a bold acknowledgement, such a daring action
in the very church itself could not have been insincere. It never
occurred to me to doubt it.

But time passed and Percy did not come back. A great crowd arrived
before he did. Someone, using the private way from the church, had
left the door open and the people began to surge in. And then
(while my heart sank with disappointment) the Master made a swift
exit.

Too late Mrs Grant, Percy's dear mother, entered the room. It was
a dramatic entrance. She ran in, distractedly, glancing from side
to side, obviously looking for the Master. Not seeing Him there,
she exclaimed: "If only I could have had His blessing! That Figure
makes me think of the plains of Judea."

At that very instant Mr Mills, who had gone out with

the Master, reappeared. "'Abdu'l-Baha," he said, "is asking for Mrs
Grant."

I stood at the street door and watched. The Master was sitting in
Mr Mills' car, just in front of the house. I saw Mrs Grant approach
it, kneel in the street and bow her head. I saw Him place His hands
on her head.

A year ago I had a dream. I was in the People's Forum, stooping and
kissing Mrs Grant. She looked up through tears. "I have seen the
Master," she said in my dream. "He spoke to me. Oh there was never
such a Face in the world!"

Now, on the steps of the Rectory, as she returned from the car, she
looked up through tears.

"I got my blessing, Juliet," she said, "and I didn't have to ask
for it."

I went back to the church to thank Percy Grant and found him alone.
His last parishioner had just gone. For a moment we stood with
clasped hands.

"You made everything so beautiful. I can't find the right words to
thank you."

"My darling," he said, "my darling--"

Something in his look--something false--woke me. Sick at heart, I
turned away.[97]

That night how I hungered to see the Master. My heart burned to see
Him. I went to the telephone. Ah, these days when just by a
telephone call we can reach Him! One of the Persians answered my
call.

"Is the Master well tonight? Is He resting?" I asked.

"He is in His room, reading Tablets."

__________

The next morning, through Ahmad, the Master telephoned me. He
wanted to know how I was.

"Tell Him my heart is burning for Him just as it used to in Haifa."

"The Master says: come at once to Him."

And scarcely was I seated in His room when He began to speak of
Percy Grant. He spoke with great love, with great appreciation of
the service Percy had rendered, but told me to be very careful in
my relations with him.

"You must keep your acquaintance, Juliet, absolutely formal."

Then He gave me this message: "Convey to Dr Grant My greetings.
Say: I will not forget the services thou hast rendered yesterday.
They are engraved on the book of My heart. I will mention thy name
everywhere. And know thou this: This matter of yesterday will
become most wonderful in the history of the world. The world of
existence will not forget yesterday. Thousands of years hence the
mention of yesterday will be heard and it will become history that
you were the founder of this work.

"I ask of God for you all those things I have asked for Myself and
they are: that thou mayest become a sincere servant of God and
serve in the Kingdom of God and become sanctified and holy; that
thou mayest find a pure and enlightened heart, an illumined face;
become the cause that the lights of spiritual morals may illumine
the hearts in this country and that they may be illumined in the
world of the Kingdom; become the promoter of Truth and deliver the
souls from ignorance and prejudice. I supplicate to the Kingdom of
God for you, and I will never forget the love that was manifested
yesterday.

"I hope," said the Master, turning to me, "that he will become a
believer, but I do not know. The rectorship of that church is in
the way. If he could give it up of his own volition, then he might
become a believer."

He spoke of my dear mother: "Convey to thy mother the greetings of
Abha. Say to her: Always remember My advices. It is my hope that
thou mayest forget everything save God. Nothing in this world is
sufficient for man. God alone is sufficient for him. God is the
Protector of man. All the world will not protect the soul."

I sent Percy Grant the message and later he telephoned me.

"That was a wonderful, wonderful message," he said, his voice
strangely upset.

__________

Early Sunday evening, the fourteenth, the Master spoke at the
Carnegie Lyceum for the Union Meeting of Advanced Thought
Centres.[98] I can give you no idea of His Glory that night. He was
like a pillar of white fire.

I sat in a box with Bolton Hall, one of our fashionable
intellectuals, a lean, elegant person with an Emersonian face.
Turning to him for a moment, I asked: "What do you see?"

"Nothing, dear child, nothing."

16 April 1912

This morning the Master agreed to speak at the Bowery Mission.

"I want to give them some money," He said to me. "I am in love with
the poor. How many poor men go to the Mission?"

"About three hundred, my Lord."

"Take this bill to the bank, Juliet, and change it into quarters,"
and He drew from His pocket a thousand-

franc note.[99] "Have them put the quarters in a bag. Keep the
money and meet Me at the Mission with it."

He handed another thousand-franc note, with the same instructions,
to Edward Getsinger.

As I left His room, lilies of valley in my hand, a young
chambermaid stopped me. "Did He give you those?" she asked. "He
gave me some flowers yesterday. Roses. I think He is a great
Saint."

__________

Later, May Maxwell and I were together in the Master's room. He was
lying back on His pillow, May's baby crawling over Him, feeding
first the baby, then May and me with chocolates.[100] On the pillow
beside Him was the victor's wreath, which He always kept near Him.
Suddenly He brought up Percy's name.

"I love Dr Grant," he began. "He has rendered Me a great service.
I love him very much, but I want you to be careful."

"My Lord, I believe my heart is severed," I said. "I don't know but
I believe so."

He looked at me with arch incredulity: "No? Really?" He said.

May laughed.

"What do you know about it?" the Master asked.

"May knows everything about it."

"Well, has she helped you? How far has her help gone? Has it been
sufficient for you?"

"She has helped me, but only God is sufficient when love has gone
as deep as that."

"I know. Now, can you transfer this love to God?"

[Photograph of 'Abdu'l-Baha walking down Riverside Drive in New
York, 1912]

"To God I can. To You."

"No. To God."

"Yes ... I can ... to God."

"That will be enough! I shall try to make no more marriages,"
laughed the Master. "When you have really given up," He added, "he
will come after you."[101]

"I love Dr Grant," He continued, "very, very much, but I want to
protect you."

"May I ask a question?" said May. "If Juliet put the thought of Dr
Grant forever out of her mind, would this be good?"

But the Master answered evasively: "If he would become a believer
and marry Juliet it would please Me very much."

"Don't we tire You?" I asked a little later. "Oughtn't we to leave
You now?"

"No, stay. You rest Me. You make Me laugh!" He answered.

18 April 1912

I asked Mrs Wright if she would invite Percy to hear the Master
speak at the Bowery Mission. His reply has just come through her.
He said: "Give Juliet my love and my excuses. Tell her I prefer to
be remembered by Him in the Church of the Ascension. Tell her this
and she will understand."

__________

Before writing of the Master's visit to the Bowery I must explain
how it came about. In February this year

Dr Hallimond asked me for the third time to give the Baha'i Message
at the Mission. I had refused twice before because my dear mother
wouldn't allow me to go there. But this third invitation I felt I
must accept. So, for the first time in my life, I deceived Mamma!
Silvia Gannett helped me out. (By the way her marriage has been
postponed.) She invited me to dine, then went to the Mission with
me. The only thing Mamma knew was that I was dining with Silvia.

The weather that night was terrible: snowing, sleeting, bitterly
cold. The Mission was packed with homeless men, some of whom had
been driven in by the cold and the storm and were there for no
other reason. Among these, I learned afterward, was John Good--may
he ever be blessed! Wonderfully named was John Good! He had been
released from Sing Sing that very day: an enormous man with a head
like a lion and a great shock of white hair. From his boyhood he
had spent his life in one prison or another and now, in his old
age, had behaved so rebelliously in Sing Sing that they would
punish him in the most painful way, hanging him up by his thumbs!
Full of hate he had come out of prison, and full of hate and
without one grain of belief in anything, he sat among the derelicts
in the Mission, forced in by the storm.

And that night (knowing nothing of John Good) I was moved to tell
the men how 'Abdu'l-Baha came out of prison, full of love for the
whole world, even His cruellest enemies.

After I had finished speaking, Dr Hallimond said: "We have heard
from Juliet Thompson that 'Abdu'l-Baha will be here in April. How
may of you would like to invite Him to speak at the Mission? Will
those who wish it please stand?"

The whole three hundred rose to their feet.

"Now," added Dr Hallimond, taking me by surprise, "how many would
like to study the thirteenth Chapter of Corinthians with Miss
Thompson and myself?"

Thirty rose this time, including John Good and a poor alcoholic
named Hannegan, a long, lanky, red-haired Irishman.

"Then we will meet every Wednesday at eight p.m. and learn
something about this Love of which 'Abdu'l-Baha is our Great
Example."

And every Wednesday evening after that John Good and Hannegan came,
with the twenty-eight others.

Of course, in order to help Dr Hallimond on these nights, I had had
to confess to Mamma this first visit to the Bowery, and she was so
touched by the story that she gladly consented to my keeping up the
work, especially as Dr Hallimond always came for me and brought me
home.

__________

And now to return to the immediate present. Day before yesterday,
19 April, the Master spoke at the Bowery Mission.

I met Him in the chapel, dragging along with me the huge white bag
of quarters. Edward also appeared with a bag of the same size and
we sat behind the Master on the platform. Mr MacNutt, Mr Mills, Mr
Grundy, and Mr Hutchinson, and of course all the Persians, were
seated there too. The long hall was packed to the doors with those
poor derelicts who sleep on park benches or doorsteps.

Dr Hallimond called upon me to introduce my Lord, which seemed so
presumptuous I could scarcely do it.

Then the Master rose to speak. Here are His heavenly

words:[102] "Tonight I am very happy for I have come here to meet
My friends. I consider you my relatives, My companions, and I am
your comrade.

"You must be thankful to God that you are poor, for His Holiness
Jesus Christ has said: 'Blessed are the poor.' He never said:
blessed are the rich! He said too that the Kingdom is for the poor
and that it is easier for a camel to enter the needle's eye than
for a rich man to enter God's Kingdom. Therefore you must be
thankful to God that although in this world you are indigent, yet
the treasures of God are within your reach, and although in the
material realm you are poor, yet in the Kingdom of God you are
precious.

"His Holiness Jesus Himself was poor. He did not belong to the
rich. He passed His time in the desert travelling among the poor
and lived upon the herbs of the field. He had no place to lay His
head--no home. He was exposed in the open to heat, cold, and frost.
Yet He chose this rather than riches. If riches were considered a
glory, the Prophet Moses would have chosen them; Jesus would have
been rich.

"When Jesus appeared it was the poor who first accepted Him, not
the rich. Therefore, you are His disciples, you are His comrades,
for outwardly He was poor, not rich.

"Even this earth's happiness does not depend upon wealth. You will
find many of the wealthy exposed to dangers and troubled by
difficulties, and in their last moments upon the bed of death,
there remains the regret that they must be separated from that to
which their

hearts are so attached. They come into this world naked and they
must go from it naked. All they possess they must leave behind and
pass away solitary, alone. Often at the time of death their souls
are filled with remorse and, worst of all, their hope in the mercy
of God is less than ours.

"Praise be to God, our hope is in the mercy of God; and there is
no doubt that the divine Compassion is bestowed upon the poor. His
Holines Jesus Christ said so; His Holiness Baha'u'llah said so.

"While Baha'u'llah was in Baghdad, still in possession of great
wealth, He left all He had and went alone from the city, living two
years among the poor. They were His comrades. He ate with them,
slept with them, and gloried in being one of them. He chose for one
of His names the title of 'The Poor One' and often in His Writings
refers to Himself as 'Darvish,' which in Persian means poor. And
of this title he was very proud. He admonished all that we must be
the servants of the poor, helpers of the poor, remember the sorrows
of the poor, associate with them, for thereby we may inherit the
Kingdom of Heaven.

"God has not said that there are mansions prepared for us if we
pass our time associating with the rich, but He has said there are
many mansions prepared for the servants of the poor, for the poor
are very dear to God. The mercies and bounties of God are with
them. The rich are mostly negligent, inattentive, steeped in
worldliness, depending upon their means, whereas the poor are
dependent upon God and their reliance is upon Him, not upon
themselves. Therefore the poor are nearer the Threshold of God and
His Throne.

"Jesus was a poor man. One night when He was out in the fields the
rain began to fall. He had no place to go for shelter, so He lifted
His eyes toward Heaven, saying: 'O Father! For the birds of the air
Thou hast created nests, for the sheep a fold, for the animals
dens, for the fishes places of refuge, but for Me Thou hast
provided no shelter; there is no place where I may lay My head. My
bed is the cold ground, My lamps at night are the stars and My food
is the grass of the field. Yet who upon earth is richer than I? For
the greatest blessing Thou hast not given to the rich and mighty,
but unto Me Thou hast given the poor. To Me Thou hast granted this
blessing. They are Mine. Therefore I am the richest man on earth.'

"So, My comrades, you are following in the footsteps of Jesus
Christ. Your lives are similar to His life, your attitude is like
unto His, you resemble Him more than the rich resemble Him.
Therefore we will thank God that we have been blest with the real
riches. And, in conclusion, I ask you to accept 'Abdu'l-Baha as
your Servant."

After the service, the Master and we who were with Him walked down
the aisle to the door, while the men in the audience kept their
seats. At the end of the aisle the Master paused, called to Edward
and me and asked us to stand on each side of Him, with our bags.
He was wearing His pongee 'aba and was very shining in white and
ivory, His Face like a lighted lamp.

Then down the aisle streamed a sodden and grimy procession: three
hundred men in single file. The "breadline". The failures. Broken
forms. Blurred faces. How can I picture such a scene? That forlorn
host out of the depths, out of the "mud and scum of things"--where
nevertheless "something always, always sings". And the

Eternal Christ, reflected in the Mirror of "The Servant", receiving
them all, like prodigal sons? stray sheep? No! Like His own beloved
children, who "resembled Him more than the rich resembled Him."

Into each palm, as the Master clasped it, He pressed His little
gift of silver: just a symbol and the price of a bed. Not a man was
shelterless that night. And many, many, I could see, found a
shelter in His Heart. I could see it in the faces raised to His and
in His Face bent to theirs.

Those interchanged looks--what a bounty to have witnessed them--to
have such a picture stamped on my mind forever!

As the men filed toward Him, the Master held out His hand to the
first, grasped the man's hand and left something in it. Perhaps
five or six quarters, for John Good told me afterward that the
completely destitute ones received the most. The man glanced up
surprised. His eyes met the Master's look, which seemed to be
plunging deep into his heart with fathomless understanding. He,
this poor derelict, must have known very little of even human love
or understanding; and now, too suddenly, he stood face to face with
Divine Love. He looked startled, incredulous--as though he couldn't
believe what he saw; then his eyes strained toward the Master,
something new burning in them, and the Master's eyes answered with
a great flash, revealing a more mysterious, a profounder love. A
drowning man rescued, or--taken up into heaven? I saw this repeated
scores of times. Some of the men shuffled past, accepting their
gift ungraciously, but most of them responded just as the first
did.

Who can tell the effect of those immortal glances on

the lives and even, perhaps, at the death of each of these men? Who
knows what the Master gave that night?

__________

(Footnote. Months later John Good told me about Hannegan. Hannegan
was a generous man. If he had a dime and somebody needed a nickel,
he would split his dime. But, there was no doubt about it, he was
also a Bowery tough and pretty nearly always drunk. He had been
counting the days to the nineteenth of April but, unluckily lost
count, and when the nineteenth came and with it the Master's visit
to the Bowery, he was in one of his stupors. Waking up from it, he
really sorrowed. Still, there was another chance. The Master was
to speak in Flatbush the following Sunday and somehow Hannegan
heard of this. Flatbush is a long way off and that Sunday he hadn't
even a nickel. So he walked. At midnight John Good went to his room
and found him in the usual state. "Why did you do it this time,
Hannegan--and you straight from seeing the Master?" asked John.
"That's just it," said Hannegan earnestly. "I'm straight from
seeing Him. Why, John, He's Perfection. The Light of the world, He
is, John. It's too much for a man, too discouraging."

John never told me this till after the death of Hanegan, or I would
have taken him to the Master. But, after all, he--this Bowery
tough--had seen the Reality.)

__________

That night the Master had a supper for all who had been with Him
at the Mission. It was held in His suite at the Ansonia and He took
me and two of the Persians, Valiyu'llah Khan and Ahmad, in His own
taxi to the hotel.

As we drove up Broadway, glittering with its electric

signs, He spoke of them smiling, apparently much amused. Then He
told us that Baha'u'llah had loved light. "He could never get
enough light. He taught us," the Master said, "to economize in
everything else but to use light freely."

"It is marvellous," I said, "to be driving through all this light
by the side of the Light of lights."

"This is nothing," the Master answered. "This is only the
beginning. We will be together in all the worlds of God. You cannot
realize here what that means. You cannot imagine it. You can form
no conception here in this elemental world of what it is to be with
Me in the Eternal Worlds."

"Oh," I cried, "with such a future before me how could my heart
cling to any earthly object?"

The Master turned suddenly to me. "Will you do this thing?" He
asked. "Will you take your heart from this other and give it wholly
to God?"

"Oh, I will try!"

He laughed heartily at this. "First you say you will and then that
you will try!"

"That is because I have learned my own weakness. What can I do with
my heart?"

And now the Master spoke gravely. "I am very much pleased with that
answer, Juliet."

__________

That night I saw, as never before, the Glory of 'Abdu'l-Baha.

Nine of us were gathered at His table. He sat at the head, Mr Mills
on His left, I on His right. Just above Him hung a big round lamp,
so that He sat in a pool of strong light while the rest of us were
in shadow. In His

ivory-coloured 'aba over the long white robe, His white hair spread
out upon His shoulders, He was like some massive statue of a deity
carved in alabaster.

For a while He was silent and we surrounded Him, silent. But after
He had served the food He began to speak. He told us of the play
The Terrible Meek which he had seen that afternoon. It is based on
the Crucifixion.

"But such a representation should be complete," He said, and taken
from its inception to its consummation. It should be an
impersonation of the life of Jesus from the beginning to the end.

"For example: His baptism. The disciples of John the Baptist
turning to Him, Jesus. The dawn of Christianity. Then the Christ
in the Temple, well portrayed. The meeting of Jesus and Peter on
the shore of Tiberias, where Jesus called Peter to follow Him that
he might become a fisher of men. The gathering together of the
Jews. Their accusations against Jesus. For they said: 'We are
expecting certain conditions at the time of the appearance of the
Messiah and unless these conditions are fulfilled it is impossible
to believe. It is written that He will come from an unknown place.
Thou are from Nazareth. We know Thee and Thy people. According to
the explicit text of the Scriptures, the Messiah is to wield a
sceptre, a sword. Thou hast not even a staff. The Messiah is to be
established on the throne of David. But Thou--a throne! Thou hast
not so much as a mat. The Messiah is to fulfil the Law of Moses,
which will be spread throughout the world. Thou hast broken the
Mosaic Law. The Jews, in the time of the Messiah, are to be the
conquerors of the world and all men will become their subjects. In
the Cycle of the Messiah justice is to

reign. It will be exercised even in the animal kingdom, so that
wolf and lamb will quaff water at the same fountain, eagle and
quail will dwell in the same nest, lion and deer pasture in the
same meadow. But see the oppression and wrong rampant in Thy time!
The Jews are the captives of the Romans. Rome has uprooted our
foundations, pillaging and killing us. What manner of justice is
this?'

"But His Holiness Jesus answered: 'These texts are symbolic. They
have an inner meaning. I possess sovereignty, but it is of the
eternal type. It is not an earthy empire. Mine is divine, heavenly,
everlasting. And I conquer not by the sword. My conquests are by
Love. I have a sword, but it is not of iron. My sword is My tongue,
which divides Truth from falsehood.'

"Yet they persisted in rejecting Him. 'These are mere
interpretations,' they said. 'We will not give up the letter for
these.'

"Then they rose against Him, accusing and persecuting Him,
inventing libels according to their superstitions.

"'He is a liar. He is the false Christ. Believe Him not. Beware
lest ye listen. He will mislead you, will lure you from the
religion of your fathers, and will create a turmoil amongst you.'

"Then the scribes and Pharisees consult together: 'Let us hold a
conclave and conceive a plan. This man is a deceiver. We must do
something. What?'" (The Master gaily mimicked their confusion.)
"'Let us expel Him from the country. Let us imprison Him. Ah! Let
us refer the matter to the government. Thus the religion of Moses
shall be free of Him.'

"After this, the betrayal of Jesus, not by an enemy, not by an
outsider, but by one of His own disciples. Dr

Farid! (I was startled by the sudden, peremptory call of that
name.) "By one of His own disciples. Had you been there, Dr Farid.
Had you been there, you would have seen that Mary of Magdala even
looked like Juliet."[103]

"Then," continued the Master, "the government will summon Jesus,
will bring Him before Pontius Pilate, and these scenes should be
fully portrayed ..."

Here I ceased to take notes. I was stabbed to the heart. As He
flashed each scene to us with His vivid words and gestures I felt
that He was reliving it. When He came to that walk to Golgotha:
Jesus, the Saviour, stumbling beneath the weight of His Cross while
the mob capered about, bowing backward, mocking "the King of the
Jews," I knew He was telling us of remembered anguish.

"And when all this is finished," He said, "then the Terrible Meek
will be expressed."

The last scene centred around the disciples, united now and ablaze
with the Pentecostal fire. The Master described them surrounded by
multitudes, teaching with those "tongues of fire" that His Holiness
Jesus had verily been a King--the King of spirits, His sword the
Word of God and His reign in the hearts of men.

When the Master had ended we sat so silent that the falling of a
rose leaf might have been heard. He broke the silence.

"The voice of Mary lamenting at the Cross today made me think of
your voice, Juliet--and Lua's." And then He smiled at me. "Eat,
Juliet," He said. For the food on my plate was untouched.

__________

In the upper hall, on our way to the Master's suite, we had met the
little chambermaid who had told me the day

before that she thought Him a great Saint. In my bag were about
eighty quarters left over from the Mission. The Master asked the
girl to hold up her apron, took the bag from me, and emptied the
whole of its contents into the apron. Then He walked quickly toward
His suite, we following, all but Mr Grundy whom the maid stopped.

"Oh see what He has given me!" she said. And when Mr Grundy told
her about the Mission and the Master's kindness to the men there,
"I will do the same with this money. I will give away every cent
of it."

Later, when the table was cleared and we were sitting with the
Master in another room, talking of the scene at the Mission,
someone asked Him if "charity were advisable."

He laughed and, still laughing, said: "Assuredly, give to the poor.
If you give them only words, when they put their hands into their
pockets after you have gone, they will find themselves none the
richer for you!"

And just at that moment we heard a light tap at the door. It opened
and there stood the little maid. She came straight towards the
Master, seeming not to see anyone else, and her eyes were full of
tears.

"I wanted to say goodbye, Sir," she said (for the Master was
leaving for Washington early the next morning), "and to thank You
for all Your goodness to me--I never expected such goodness--and
to ask You ... to pray for me." Her voice broke. She sobbed, hid
her face in her apron and rushed from the room.

What an illustration to the Master's words, "assuredly give to the
poor," and how wonderfully timed!

22 April 1912

Oh, those mornings at the Ansonia in the Master's white sunny
rooms, filled with spring flowers and roses!

People poured in to see Him in droves, sometimes a hundred and
fifty in one morning. He would become exhausted and receive the
latest arrivals in bed. Sitting in the outer room (though
frequently called to Him), I would watch them go into His bedroom
and come out changed, as though they had had a bath of Life, or
like candles that had been lighted in that inner chamber.

Leonard Abbott came out with flushed cheeks and bright eyes. "That
beautiful head against the pillows!" he said.

Charles Rand Kennedy, the playwright (author of The Terrible Meek)
said: "I was in the Presence of God."

I, myself, took Nancy Sholl in. When we left, she whispered to me:
"I could not have stood the vibrations in there one moment longer.
Power encircles that bed!"

__________

Alas, New York has now lost the great overhanging aura of the
Master. He is in Washington. But I am going there too, tomorrow,
to stay with my dear Mrs Elkins.

Washington

7 May 1912

Washington was beautiful, the banners of the spring floating out
everywhere. Trees along the street in full leaf. Flowering bushes
and tulip beds in the parks and in the grass plots in front of
houses. The Japanese cherry

[Photograph of 'Abdu'l-Baha in New York with His entourage, 1912]

trees behind the White House, a long row of coral-pink clouds.

The day I arrived, 23 April, I met the Master at luncheon at the
Persian Embassy, where Khan is now acting as minister.[104] The
table was strewn with rose petals, as the Master's table always is
in 'Akka, and Persian dishes were served.

A coloured man, Louis Gregory, was present and the Master gave a
wonderful talk on race prejudice which, however, I will not quote
here since it has been kept.[105] And besides, I am longing to
catch up with these days, when I am feeling with all my capacity
for feeling, when the gates of my heart are flung wide open and
fire sweeping through, burning up my heart, when I am seeing
through tears the Manifest Glory of the Beloved. I really don't
want to write about Washington. This heart was not awakened then.

But He said a lovely thing at Khan's table which I must keep. Mrs
Parsons was at the luncheon. Before she became a Baha'i she had
been a Christian Scientist, and now she brought up the question of
mental suggestion as a cure for physical disease. The Master
replied that some illnesses, such as consumption and insanity,
developed from spiritual causes--grief, for example--and that these
could be healed by the spirit. But Mrs Parsons persisted. Could not
extreme physical cases, like broken bones, also be healed by the
spirit?

A large bowl of salad had been placed before the Mas-

ter, Who sat at the head of the table, Florence Khanum[106] on His
right.

"If all the spirits in the air," He laughed, "were to congregate
together, they could not create a salad! Nevertheless, the spirit
of man is powerful. For the spirit of man can soar in the firmament
of knowledge, can discover realities, can confer life, can receive
the Divine Glad-Tidings. Is not this greater," and He laughed
again, "than making a salad?"

One more lovely thing. The servants were late bringing in the
dessert and Florence apologized; whereupon little Rahim, standing
beside her, spoke up.

"Even the King of Persia has to wait, doesn't He, mother?"

"Rahim dear," explained Florence, 'Abdu'l-Baha is King of the whole
world."

"Oh," said Rahim, very much abashed, "I forgot."

__________

After the luncheon, Florence and Khan held a large reception, to
which a number of very distinguished people came, among them Diya
Pasha, the Turkish Minister, and his whole family, Duke Lita and
his wife, Admiral Peary, and Alexander Graham Bell.

Between the end of lunch and this reception the Master went
upstairs to rest and to give a few private interviews. When He
reappeared among us, the two living rooms were already crowded. He
walked quickly to the open folding doors and standing there at the
centre, with a strikingly free and simple bearing, immediately
began to speak. His words too were simple and of a captivating
sweetness, a startling clarity.

[Photograph of 'Abdu'l-Baha with the children of 'Ali Quli Khan]

Diya Pasha stood next to me, his eyes riveted on the Master. When
the Master had finished speaking, the old diplomat (who is a fierce
Muslim) turned to me. "This is irrefutable. This is pure logic,"
he said.

A few months before, at the request of his daughter-in-law, an
American girl and a dear friend of mine, I had given Diya Pasha the
Message. I had had to give it in French, as he doesn't understand
English, and, my French being rusty by now, I'm afraid I didn't do
it very well: he looked so sceptical, almost contemptuous the whole
time I was speaking. But when I said that through the Baha'i
Teaching I had become a Muslim, and convinced him of this by the
reverent way I spoke of Muhammad, I really touched Diya Pasha. He
rose from the table, where we were at lunch, left the room, and
returned with a precious and very old volume of the Qur'an on
illuminated parchment and with a hand-tooled cover. "No Christian
eye but yours," he said, "has ever looked upon this."

__________

To return to the Persian Embassy. A delicious thing happened when
the Master greeted Peary, who has just succeeded in publicly
disgracing Captain Cook and proving himself, and not Captain Cook,
the discoverer of the North Pole. At that moment, in the Embassy,
he looked like a blown-up balloon.

I was standing beside the Master when Khan brought the Admiral over
and introduced him.

The Master spoke charmingly to him and congratulated him on his
discovery. Then, with the utmost sweetness, added these surprising
words: For a very long time the world had been much concerned about
the North Pole, where it was and what was to be found

there. Now he, Admiral Peary, had discovered it and that nothing
was to found there; and so, in forever relieving the public mind,
he had rendered a great service.

I shall never forget Peary's nonplussed face. The balloon
collapsed!

__________

Immediately after the Khan's reception, Mrs Parsons too had a large
one for the Master, to which Diya Pasha came with Him. I saw them,
to my great delight, enter the hall together hand in hand.

Mrs Parsons house has real distinction. It is Georgian in style and
in it has a very long white ballroom with, at one end, an unusually
high mantel--the mantel, as well as the ceiling and panelled walls,
delicately carved with garlands. At the windows hang thin silk
curtains the colour of jonquil leaves.

Here, after this first reception, the Master spoke daily in the
afternoon and the whole fashionable world flocked to hear Him.
Scientists too, and even politicians came!

In front of the mantel, a platform had been placed for the Master
and every day it was banked with fresh roses, American Beauties.

Into this room of conventional elegance, packed with conventional
people, imagine the Master striding with His free step: walking
first to one of the many windows and, while He looked out into the
light, talking with His matchless ease to the people. Turning from
the window, striding back and forth with a step so vibrant it shook
you. Piercing our souls with those strange eyes, uplifting them,
glory streaming upon them. Talking, talking, moving to and fro
incessantly. Pushing back His turban, revealing that Christ-like
forehead; pushing it forward again almost down to His eyebrows,
which gave Him a

peculiar majesty. Charging, filling the room with magnetic
currents, with a mysterious energy. Once He burst in, a child on
His shoulder. For a moment He held her, caressing her. Then He sat
her down among the roses.

__________

On Thursday, 25 April, the Master dined at the Turkish Embassy and
I was privileged to be there.

Never have I seen such a beautiful table. Hundreds of roses lay the
whole length of it, piled, melting into each other, sweeping up
from the head and the foot of the table to a great mound in the
centre, where the Master sat, faced by Diya Pasha. Florence Khanum
and Carey, Madame Diya Bey (Diya Pasha's daughter-in-law), the
American wives of Oriental diplomats, were placed on either side
of the Master and I sat next to Carey.

There are times when the Master looks colossal, when His Holiness
shines like the sun. That night He wore the usual white, with a
honey-coloured 'aba. Diya Pasha, opposite Him, watched Him with
eyes full of tears, his keen old hawk's face strangely softened.

The Master gave a great address on the civilizations built on the
basic Teachings of the Prophets; then He spoke of this dinner as
"a wonderful occasion". "The East and the West," He said, "are met
in perfect love tonight." There was something so poignant in His
words, so flame-creating, that for a moment I was overcome.

Later He spoke of the deep significance of the international
marriages represented there: Diya Bey's and Carey's, 'Ali-Quli
Khan's and Florence's. Carey made me very happy by saying: "Juliet
told me long ago of Your Teachings, when I was only fifteen years
old." What fruit that seed had borne, sown in a child!

[Photograph: 'Abdu'l-Baha with the Persian Consul-general for New
York and his household, Morristown, New Jersey.]

Diya Pasha made a thrilling speech. Rising and turning a lover's
face to the Master, he called Him "the Light of the world, the
Unique One of the age, Who had come to spread His glory and
perfection amongst us."

"I am not worthy of this," said the Master, very simply. Always a
great power is released from the Master's divine humility.

As I bade Diya Pasha goodnight, looking at me through a mist of
tears, he said: "Truly, He is a Saint."

__________

One day Mrs Elkins invited the Master to drive with us and we went
to the Soldiers' Home. The Elkinses, because of Katharine's
engagement to the Duke of the Abruzzi, have been terribly hounded
by the newspapers, but this happened before the Master came. He
couldn't have known about it through any outward means. Yet no
sooner were we seated in the car than He said to Mrs Elkins: "How
the newspapers here persecute one!"

It was such a sympathetic subject! At once Mrs Elkins opened her
heart.

"Come away!" smiled the Master. "Elude these journalists! Come to
Haifa where there is peace. Juliet will tell you there is peace in
Haifa."

Then He spoke of how much I loved her and of her philanthropic
deeds, which He prayed might increase. He captured her hand and
kept it in His, while she hastily hid the sweet gesture under her
cape.

"Nothing endures, Mrs Elkins," He said. "Nothing but the Love of
God endures. Look at these trees in full blossom now." And in words
which I will not try to repeat He described the turning of the
seasons: the trees in summer flourishing green leaves; the
inevitable autumn with the leaves lying, yellow, on the ground.

"This," He said, "is a symbol of human life."

"Remember Babylon." He drew a vivid picture of ancient Babylon, its
towers, its stupendous art; then of Babylon today: a waste of
rubble, "the hyena prowling among its crumbled stones." No other
sign of life but the "voice of the owl by night" or "a lark singing
at daybreak." "Remember Tyre. Here too was beauty and splendour and
pomp. Think of Tyre now. I have been there. I have seen."

He spoke of my mother that day: "Juliet's mother is very good. Her
heart is very pure. As soon as we met, her face became radiant."

When we reached home, Mrs Elkins said to me: "You can't hide a
thing from Him. He sees everything that is in your heart."

The day Mrs Elkins first met the Master she mentioned her husband,
the senator,[107] who died about a year ago. "I wish he were here
now," she said, "to meet You."

"Insha'llah," replied the Master, "for his good deeds I shall meet
him in the Kingdom of God."

One of the senator's good deeds had been to protect the Baha'is in
'Akka and Haifa while the Master was being tried for His life in
1907.

__________

I was so thankful to be in Washington. At those daily meetings in
Mrs Parsons' house I would see many of my old friends, friends of
my childhood. Mrs Elkins went with me every day to the meetings:
sometimes, when all the chairs were taken, standing the whole
afternoon, although she was far from well.

One day, however, she was not with me. That night she was giving
a small diner and an opera party and she

had to rest for this. So, being free for an hour or so, I decided
to stay at Mrs Parsons' and have a little visit with Edna.

While Edna and I were talking, the Master suddenly entered the
room. "I am going out for a drive," He said, "but wait till I
return, Edna, and you too, Juliet, wait. I will see you in a short
time."

So I waited--waited and waited. Half-past six came. Seven. We were
to dine at half-past seven and the Elkinses' house was a long way
off, rather indirect on the car-line.

"Go, Juliet," urged Edna. "I will explain."

But how could I? My Lord had told me to stay.

And now I shall have to digress and tell what may seem, just at
first, another story: When I was ten years old, (and I remember the
time because that year we were living with my grandmother) a very
presumptuous idea took possession of me. I began to dream of some
day painting the Christ. I even prayed that I might. "O God," I
would pray, "You know Christ didn't look like a woman, the way all
the pictures of Him look. Please let me paint Him when I grow up
as the King of Men." And I never lost hope of this till I saw the
Master. Then I knew that no one could paint the Christ. Could the
sun with the whole universe full of its radiations, or endless
flashes of lightning be captured in paint?

Imagine my surprise and dismay, fear, joy and gratitude all mixed
together, at the news given me by Mrs Gibbons when the Master first
came to New York. The night before He landed she had received a
Tablet in which He said: "On My arrival in America Miss Juliet
Thompson shall paint a wonderful portrait of Me." This was in
response to a supplication from Mrs Gibbons

asking that her daughter might paint Him, which she never did,
though the Master graciously gave her permission, even more
graciously adding those words about me.

It was a little after seven when the Master came back from His
drive. Entering the room in which He had left me and where of
course I was still waiting, He said: "Ah, Juliet! For your sake I
returned. Mrs Hemmick[108] wanted to keep Me, but I had asked you
to wait; therefore I returned." After a pause He added: "Would you
like to come up and paint Me tomorrow?"

So I learned the reward of obedience. Such a reward for so small
an act of obedience! Once in Haifa He said to me: "Keep My words,
obey My commands and you will marvel at the results."

And, by a miracle, I wasn't late for dinner! The dinner, because
of another guest, had been postponed a half hour.

The next morning I went very early to Mrs Parsons' house, taking
my box of pastels; but though it was only eight o'clock, quite a
crowd had already gathered and I felt that the morning was doomed
to be a broken one. Not only that, but the light in the rooms
upstairs, where I was supposed to paint, is very weak, and the
delicate wallpaper, with tiny bunches of flowers all over it, I
couldn't use as a background for His head. For a while I was in
despair, for I dared not make the suggestion I had in mind. But in
the end I did. Begging Him to forgive me if I were doing something
wrong, I asked if He would pose in New York instead. To this he
consented so freely and sweetly that I had no more qualms about it.

The following day I went to Mrs Parsons' to meet Lee McClung, the
Treasurer of the United States. Lee McClung had been one of the
idols of my early adolescence. He had seemed quite old to me then,
though now he is only thirty-eight. When I saw him again last
winter for the first time in about ten years, he had made all sorts
of fun of me for my "conversion to Bahaism". "It made me laugh out
of one eye and cry out of the other," he said. "What does your
mother think about it? Have you converted her?"

But at Mrs Parsons' first meeting, to my great surprise, there he
was in the audience! I couldn't wait to speak to him or to present
him to the Master as Mrs Elkins was in a hurry that day, but in the
evening he dined with us.

"How did you feel when you saw the Master?" I asked him.

A shy look came into his face, and Mr McClung is anything but shy.
"Well, I felt as though I were in the presence of one of the great
old Prophets: Elijah, Isaiah, Moses. No, it was more than that!
Christ ... no, now I have it. He seemed to me my Divine Father."

Then he said he must leave us a little early, as he was going to
Mr Bell's--Alexander Graham Bell's--to meet 'Abdu'l-Baha there.

Later I was told that the Master had made an address at Mr Bell's;
then others were called on to speak. But when Lee McClung was
called on he said: "After 'Abdu'l-Baha has spoken, I cannot."

At Mr McClung's request, I had made an appointment for him with the
Master for a private interview and this was the reason I was here
to meet him at Mrs Parsons'. I arrived a little ahead of time and
while I was

waiting for Mr McClung, a door in the hall opened and there stood
the Master, beckoning to me. He was alone, so we had to fall back
on His English and my scant Persian.

"How is your mother?" He asked first. "How old is she?"

But I couldn't tell Him, Mamma having always concealed her age till
I think even she doesn't know it now.

"About fifty?"

"I think so."

"How old are you?"

I confessed my age.

"In My eyes you are fifteen," He replied, so sweetly.

"In our eyes I am an infant?"

"Yes. Baby!"

Then the translator arrived.

"Tell Juliet," the Master began at once, "that she teaches well.
I have met many people who have been affected by you, Juliet. You
are not eloquent, you are not fluent, but your heart teaches. You
speak with a feeling, an emotion which makes people ask: 'What is
this she has?' Then they inquire; they seek and find. It is so too
with Lua. You never find Lua speaking with dry eyes! You will be
confirmed. A great bounty will descend upon you. You will become
eloquent. Your tongue will be loosed. Teach, always teach. The
confirmations of the Holy Spirit descend upon those who teach
constantly. Never feel fear. The Holy Spirit will give you the
words to say. Never fear You will grow stronger and stronger."

That erect head, that hand held high in command, the Power that
eddied from Him as He spoke those words, how can I ever feel fear
again when I have to mount the dreaded platform?

It was later that He said to me: "You have many friends. You have
no enemies. Everybody is your friend. Do not think I am ignorant
of conditions in New York. Both factions are pleased with you,
Juliet, and have nothing but good to say of you, although they
complain of others. Miss X is pleased with you! Mrs XX is pleased
with you!" (laughing as He mentioned the two chief disturbers of
the peace). "And you have accomplished this only through your
sincerity. Others may do this through diplomatic action, but you
have done it with your heart."

__________

(Footnote. I am destroying my diary in longhand and I can't bear
to lose any of the Master's words to me, those dear words of
encouragement. That is why I keep them.)

__________

Just then Lee McClung arrived and the Master took him
upstairs.[109]

__________

New York

11 May 1912

On Saturday, 11 May, just one month from the day of His landing,
the Master returned to New York from Washington, Cleveland, and
Chicago.

A few of us gathered in His rooms to prepare them for Him and fill
them with flowers; then to wait for His arrival: May Maxwell, Lua
Getsinger, Carrie Kinney, Kate Ives, Grace Robarts, and I. Mr Mills
and Mr Woodcock were waiting too.

The Master has a new home, in the Hudson Apartment House,[110]
overlooking the river. His flat is on one of the top stories, so
that its windows frame the sky. Now the windows were all open and
a fresh breeze blew in.

[Photograph: 'Abdu'l-Baha with children and Persian entourage.]

About five o'clock He came. Oh the coming of that Presence! If only
I could convey to the future the mighty commotion of it! The hearts
almost suffocate with joy, the eyes burn with tears at the stir of
that step! It is futile to try to express it. Sometimes when the
sun breaks through clouds and spreads a great fiery glow, I get
something of that feeling.

After greeting us all the Master took a seat by the window and
began to talk to us, with supreme love and gladness, wittily,
tenderly, eloquently, carrying us up as if on wings to the apex of
sublime feeling, so that we wept; then turning our tears to sudden
little ripples of laughter as an unexpected gleam of wit flashed
out; then melting our hearts with His yearning affection.

He had been horrified in Washington by the prejudice against the
Negroes. "What does it matter," He asked, "if the skin of a man is
black, white, yellow, pink, or green? In this respect the animals
show more intelligence than man. Black sheep and white sheep, white
doves and blue do not quarrel because of difference of colour."

Lua, May, and I, for the first time together in the Glory of His
Presence, sat on the floor in a corner, gazing through tears at Him
and whenever we could wrench our eyes from the sorrowful beauty of
His face, silhouetted against the sky, gazing at one another, still
through tears.

Day after day I was with Him there. Lua and I had permission to be
always with Him. I would go to His apartment in the early morning
and stay through the whole day and again and again He would call
me to His Presence.

"My Lord," I said once, "I really shouldn't take Your time. I don't
want to take Your time. I am only too

thankful to be here, serving at a distance, somewhere in Your
atmosphere."

"I know you are content with whatever I do, therefore I send for
you, Juliet," He replied.

13 May 1912

On the thirteenth of May (Percy Grant's birthday) a meeting of the
Peace Conference took place at the Hotel Astor. It was an enormous
meeting with thousands present. The Master was the Guest of Honour
and the first speaker, Dr Grant and Rabbi Wise the other speakers.

The Master sat at the centre on the high stage, Dr Grant on His
right, Rabbi Wise on His left. Oh, the symbolism of that: the
Jewish rabbi, the Christian clergyman, with the Centre of the
Covenant between, on the platform of the World Peace
Conference.[111]

The Master was really too ill to have gone to this Conference. He
had been in bed all morning, suffering from complete exhaustion,
and had a high temperature. I was with Him all morning. While I was
sitting beside Him I asked: "Must You go to the Hotel Astor when
You are so ill?"

"I work by the confirmations of the Holy Spirit," He answered. "I
do not work by hygienic laws. If I did," He laughed, "I would get
nothing done."

After that meeting, the wonderful record of which has been kept,
the Master shook hands with the whole audience, with every one of
those thousands of people!

14 May 1912

On Friday, the fourteenth of May, I had quite a distinguished
visitor, Khan Bahadur Allah-Bakhsh, the Governor of Lahore. Mr
Barakatu'llah had sent him to see me. I invited him to my meeting
that night and he

came and seemed to fall in love with the Teachings. The next
morning early he called on the Master at the Hudson Apartment
House. Lua, May, and I were there at the time and I told him that
May was one of my spiritual mothers and Lua my spiritual
grandmother. Whereupon the old gentleman said that in that case I
was his mother, May Maxwell his grandmother, and Lua his
great-grandmother!

Very soon the Master sent for him and kept him a long time in His
room. When the interview was over and Khan Bahadur Allah-Bakhsh had
left, the Master called me to Him.

"You teach well, Juliet," He said. "You teach with ecstasy. You
ignite the souls. A great bounty will descend upon you. I have
perfect confidence in you as a teacher. Your heart is pure,
absolutely pure."

My heart absolutely pure! I wept.

Then, for the second time, the Master gave me a picture of Himself.

Three days later I had a note from the Governor of Lahore. In it
he said: "'Abdu'l-Baha is the Divine Light of today."

__________

One night I took Marjorie to the Master. She had in her hand an
offering of tulips, grown in her own garden, and these He
distributed among His visitors.

"Juliet's love for you is divine," He said, speaking to Marjorie,
"and your love for each other must become so great that no stab
will affect it." Then He told us that, in reality, our friendship
was an "eternal" one.

Marion deKay went with me to Him.

"Your friend, Juliet? Ancient friend?" and He smiled at the child.
"You must become a flame of love." ("Like Juliet," He said. I have
to keep all His sweet words to

me.) "You must become as steadfast as a rock, firm! strong! so that
when the storms break over you, when the thunder roars and the
winds rage, you will not be shaken. You must become a teacher, a
speaker."

On the fifteenth of May the Master went away for a few days. As
soon as He returned Lua telephoned me. "The Master says: come up
now if you wish. If not, you have permission to come to Him at any
time and to stay as long as you are able. Only, don't displease
your mother. He wants her to be happy, He says. This is His
message, Julie."

19 May 1912

On Sunday, 19 May, He spoke at the Church of the Divine
Paternity.[112] This was unbearably beautiful. The church is
Byzantine, making me think of the worship of the early Christians.
The interior is of grey stone.

Oh the look of His that day! Then, more vividly than ever, He shone
as the Good Shepherd, returned at last to His flocks. I wept
through the whole service. At the end of the pew in front of me sat
Lua, her eyes fixed on the master, rapt, adoring, her beauty
immeasurably heightened by that recognition, that adoration.

Soon I caught a glimpse of another rapt face--a man's--my old
friend, Mr Bailey's. Mr Bailey is the last person I could have
hoped to see there. A very old gentleman, he had always seemed to
me a hopelessly unconvertible atheist. At least he would never
listen to a word from me about the Cause. And now, here he sat, and
never have I seen a face more touched. His eyes were wistful, like
a child's, shyly reverent and as limpid as though there were tears
in them.

He met me that afternoon at the Master's apartment,

making his entrance with these words: "I have been thinking since
this morning that the way to the attainment of greatness is through
elimination."

"You felt," I ventured, "'Abdu'l-Baha's simplicity?"

"One would naturally feel,"--huffily--"the simplicity of Niagara."

"And the beauty of His Face?"

"The patriarchal grandeur of His face cannot be denied."

Later, how his eyes hung on that Face while the Master talked with
him!

21 May 1912

On 21 May, Mrs Tatum[113] had a reception for the Master. The
people who were there were of the fashionable world, with a
sprinkling of artists and writers. Mrs Sheridan was pouring tea.

Mrs Tatum's house is beautiful. The impression you get is of space
and light. A white staircase winds up through a very wide hall,
from which, on each side, rooms open--living rooms, dining room,
library. All these were soon crowded.

The first friend I caught sight of was Louis Potter.[114] He

came running up to me, exclaiming: "Oh august Juliet!" and attached
himself at once to Lua and me. Suddenly, there was a stir among the
people, and 'Abdu'l-Baha was in our midst. He walked over to a
yellow couch which curved along the big half-moon of the bay window
and sat down on it.

I think I must tell you how He looked there. His surroundings were
all white and yellow. Sunlight streamed in. The shadows on His face
were transparent; His profile, against the blue sky through the
polished glass of the windowpane, outlined in light.

"Come, Louis," I said to Louis Potter, "let's go to the Master."

Louis had never seen Him before, but he skipped forward like a
buoyant faun, his head tipped to one side, his hands outstretched.

"Ah-h-h!" he said. It was a little cry from his soul, as though he
were just coming home, and was so glad.

And the Master too said: "Ah-h-h!" His arms wide open, welcoming
Louis home.

Percy Grant arrived. As soon as he appeared, big and imposing, in
the room, the Master rose almost eagerly, smiling and holding out
His hand.

"Ah! Dr Grant!" He said.

They stood for what seemed to me minutes, their hands clasped,
Percy, with beautiful deference, bowing his head, a gentle, almost
tender look on his face. One of the Persians translated the
Master's greeting to him but spoke so low that I could not catch
the words. Then Percy sat down on the curving window seat so that
he faced the Master.

Soon there was another stir in the room. A small, rather plain
middle-aged woman with the most astonishing eyes--very clear, very
violet--stood in the

doorway, almost timidly, and the Master at once sent Dr Farid to
her to ask her to come and sit by Him. This was Sarah Graham
Mulhall.

He spoke a few words to her and she rose and went out, returning
after some time with a tray and a pot of tea and two cups on it.
The tray was placed on a stool between the Master and Miss Mulhall
and they drank their tea together.

__________

(Footnote. 1947. Miss Mulhall's father and brother, who were
physicians, had come to New York from England to study the effects
of drugs on the body and mind. Both died mysteriously. Miss
Mulhall's only training had been in music. She was a very gentle,
retiring woman and knew nothing of the ways of business or
organization or medicine, or anything that would have equipped her
for the evidently dangerous work of her father and brother. But
something inside her, against which she fought, urged her to
continue it. She was in the midst of this inward conflict when Mrs
Tatum telephoned her and asked her to come to meet the Master. At
first Miss Mulhall declined, saying that she really couldn't go
anywhere, she was too absorbed in her own problems, she couldn't
face a crowd of people. But later she thought: Perhaps 'Abdu'l-Baha
is a Prophet, as Mrs Tatum believes,[115] and He might help me in
making my decision.

The Master, when He called her to Him in Mrs Tatum's house, asked
if she would do something for Him. Would she brew some tea for Him
with her own

hands and drink it with Him? And while they drank tea and talked,
He Himself brought up her problem.

He told her she must do the work she had in mind; she would rise
very high in it and become "a great Counsellor"; God would always
protect her and all the Celestial Beings of the Supreme Concourse
would rally to her assistance.

She did become a Great Counsellor. After years of wonderful work,
Governor Smith, Al Smith, made her Adviser and First Commissioner
of Narcotics for New York State. One night she herself led a raid
against one of the chief centres of the drug ring--a ring of very
rich, prominent men, some of them "pillars" of St. Patrick's, some
"pillars" of St. John's Cathedral. Rounding them up in their
centre, an apartment on Park Avenue, she, with the help of her
squad of police, locked them in; then telephoned to the governor.
He took the next train to New York and upheld Miss Mulhall's
determination to bring them all to trial. Then he went to Cardinal
Hayes and Bishop Manning. Cardinal Hayes said: "These men are the
worst type of criminals. I agree with you that they must be
punished." Bishop Manning said: "You can't touch my parishioners.
They are the builders of St. John's Cathedral." He threatened Miss
Mulhall. "If you ruin them, I will destroy your office." Which he
did, ultimately, for of course every one of the men was found
guilty and sent to Fort Leavenworth. After Lehman was elected
Governor, the Narcotics Commission was abolished. But in the
meantime Miss Mulhall had done a tremendous work. Her book, Opium,
the Demon Flower, has become world famous.)

__________

Then I caught sight of little "Fergie". His real name I don't want
to mention because of what I am going to

tell. He is a noted newspaper man who writes visionary books on
economics. Percy Grant calls him "my prophet". His face is pale
and pinched and suffering and he wears a thick chestnut wig. I went
up to him and asked: "Wouldn't you like to meet the Master?" "I
think not," he drawled, "I really have nothing to say to Him."

And now the Master began to speak to the whole roomful of people.

He was very happy, He said, to be with us. "Think of the contrast!"
For years He had been imprisoned in a fortress, His associates
criminals. Now He found Himself in spacious homes, "associating,"
He said, "with you."

His talk gradually shaped itself to some definite point, which,
however, He kept for the very end. I wondered what could be coming.
When it came it was like a thunderclap.

"Think of it," He said. "Two kings were dethroned in order that I
might be freed. This is naught but pure destiny."

I glanced at Percy Grant and saw that he was deeply stirred. He had
been listening, still with that tender deference, his head slightly
tipped to one side, but at these last startling words of the
Master's, in a flash the placidity of his face broke up, something
burned through and his eyes sparked.

"And now," ended the Master, suddenly rising to His feet, strong
and incredibly majestic, "you here in America must work with Me for
the peace of the world and the oneness of mankind."

And with this He left us, the room seeming strangely empty after
He had gone.

The next morning early Howard MacNutt came to see me, looking so
radiant that I knew he was bringing good news. Then he told me. He
had just had breakfast with

Dr Grant, and the Master was to speak again at the Church of the
Ascension--at the People's Forum this time, the night of 2 June.
Bishop Burch had severely reprimanded Percy for inviting the Master
to speak on 14 April and for seating Him in the Bishop's chair! But
an idiotic thing like that would never stop Percy Grant--only make
him more defiant.

He had talked very freely with Mr MacNutt about 'Abdu'l-Baha and
His address of the day before with its great climax. "As I
listened," he said, "I realized profoundly that this was a historic
moment; that before me sat One Who, imprisoned for the sake of
humankind, had been freed by the Power of God alone, through the
dethroning of two kings."

Return to New York

On 22 May the Master left for Boston, returning the twenty-sixth.
After His return He stayed with the Kinneys a day or so (till He
moved to His new house), and then came my test! For two days He
never even looked at me. My heart bled and burned. I could not
endure the withdrawal of His nearness. The third day I went to the
new house--309 West Seventy-Eighth Street--and there, in Lua's
arms, I sobbed my heart out.

"I cry," I said, "only because I love Him," (which I fear was not
exactly true) "because I have just realized how terrifically I love
Him. This love burns my heart. It is beyond endurance."

Then He sent for me to come to Him.

__________

With tears rolling down my cheeks I entered His Presence. He was
sitting on a couch writing and did not look up--still didn't look
at me! But at last He said, going straight to the point, piercing
to the real cause of my trouble: "I have not seen you lately,
Juliet, because of

the multitude of the affairs. But I have not forgotten My promise
to pose for you. Come on Saturday with your materials and I will
sit."

I thanked Him; then falling on my knees, begged Him not to banish
me from His Presence. I could not endure to be separated from Him.
I loved, loved Him.

He rose, stood above me, took my hand and held it a long, long
time. I still knelt at His feet, the hem of His garment pressed to
my lips.

Lua joined her sweet voice to mine.

"Julie has had so much trouble this year. She wants to stay close
to You now so that her heart may be healed."

"I want to stay close because I love You!"

He smiled and said something about another love.

"That is gone. Gone," I cried.

At these words of mine which I thought were true, the strangest
thing happened. Always when the Master holds my hand I feel a flow
of sparks from His palm to mine. Now this current of Life was
suddenly cut off. Could I have lied to my Lord, and so, by
unconscious self-deception, disconnected myself from the
Fountainhead of pure Truth?

But His answer was merciful, reminding me of past sincerities. "I
am pleased with you, Juliet. You are so truthful. You tell me
everything. She said:" (He turned, laughing, to Lua) "'This is my
heart. What can I do with it?'"

I laughed too, through my tears. But soon I began to cry again.

He went back to the couch and sat down and Lua and I followed Him
and knelt together at His feet there.

"Don't cry!" (I wish the whole world could hear the

Master say "don't cry". Tears would soon cease to be.) "Don't cry!
Unhappiness and the love of Baha'u'llah cannot exist in the same
heart, for the love of Baha'u'llah is happiness."

"I cry for love of you, my Lord. My tears come from my heart. I
can't help it."

"Your eyes and Lua's"--and He laughed again--"are two rivers of
tears." "I love Juliet," He added, "for her truthfulness."

"I told Juliet," said Lua, putting her arms around me, as we still
knelt together side by side, "of Your words to Mrs Kaufman: that
these human loves were like waves of the sea rolling to the shore
one behind the other, each wave receding."

"Balih," (yes) said the Master, "this is true. You will not find
faithfulness in humanity. All humanity is unfaithful. Only God is
faithful. Baha'u'llah spent fifty years in prison for the sake of
humanity. There was faithfulness!"

"From this moment," cried Lua, "Juliet and I dedicate our lives to
Thee and we beg to at last die in Thy Path--to drink the cup of
martyrdom. Oh, it would be so good for the Cause if two Americans
could do this! Take hold of His coat, Julie, and beseech."

I touched the hem of His garment.

"Say yes," implored Lua. "Oh Julie, beg Him to say yes."

But in Thonon I had told the Master that I would not ask for that
cup again but would wait till God found me ready for it.

"I accept the dedication of your lives now. The rest will be
decided later."

And it was clear what He meant. How we must amuse Him!

__________

I must go back a little. On Sunday, 26 May, the night of the
Master's return from Boston, He spoke at Mr Ramsdell's (Baptist)
church.[116]

My friend, Lawrence White, who lives in Utica, had come to New York
to met the Master, and he, Silvia Gannett, and I went together to
the church.

We entered, to see a breathtaking picture: That church suggests an
old Jewish synagogue. Behind the chancel is a sweeping arch from
which hangs a dark, massive curtain in folds straight as organ
pipes. The chancel was empty that night except for the Master,
sitting--almost lying--in a semicircular chair, His head thrown
back, His luminous eyes uprolled. The sleeves of His
bronze-coloured 'aba branched out from His shoulders like great
spread wings, hiding His hands, so that I was conscious only of His
head and those terribly alive eyes. There was an awful mystery
about that dominance of the head. It seemed to obliterate the human
form and reveal Him as the Face of God. The curtain behind Him
might have concealed the Ark of the Covenant, which He, THE
COVENANT, was guarding.

Later, when He rose to speak, the Manifestation of the Glory was
entirely different. He diffused a softer radiance.

"Look at Him and see the Christ," whispered Lawrence White.

__________

Next, He spoke at the Church of the Open Door. Again the Shepherd.
Again I watched Him through blinding tears.

2 June 1912

On the second of June He spoke for Dr Grant's Forum.[117] And there
He was simpler; He manifested less, or perhaps I should say
manifested something different: a sort of brotherhood to the
masses, still retaining His grandeur. And how He addressed Himself
to that meeting and to the heart of Percy Grant!

The subject was: "What can the Orient bring to the Occident?"

That subject in that church!

Lua and I were in a front pew with Valiyu'llah Khan and Mirza
Mahmud. Suddenly I was petrified to see Mason Remey coming in,
through the door of the vestry-room. When he was last in the Church
of the Ascension I was siting beside him, engaged to him, while
Percy thundered at me from the pulpit. The text of the sermon that
Sunday was the same as the text today: "What can the Orient bring
to the Occident." "Nothing but disease and death," said Percy, his
eyes on me, "and God wants us to live; He wants us to live."

But the Speaker this time was the Master. He said: "The Orient
brings to the Occident the Manifestations of God."

Then He defined the Church as that Collective Centre which,
attracting many diverse elements, united them

into one ordered system, adding that the Church was but a
reflection of the real Collective Centre, the Shepherd, Who,
whenever His sheep became scattered, reappeared to unite them. So
the Church, established by God's Manifestation, was the Law of God,
and when Christ said to Peter, "On thee will I build My Church,"
He meant He would build His Law upon Peter. Upon him Christ built
the Law of God by which all peoples and creeds were afterward
unified.

The Master had said it again to Percy Grant: "Be thou like Peter,"
for this was His message sent by me last summer.

When, at the end of the marvellous address, Percy stepped out into
the chancel, it was another man I saw: a man touched by the Hand
of God, shaken to the very roots of his being. As Marjorie said,
he looked ill and strangely upset. He could scarcely articulate.

The questions followed; it is the custom of the Forum to ask
questions. In the centre of the chancel sat the Master, Dr Grant
on His right in a choirstall, Dr Farid behind Him. How at home the
Master looked there! He pushed back His turban and smiled as He
answered, often very wittily. Once He raised one finger high. I
caught my breath then. He was like Jesus in the synagogue
confronting the scribes and Pharisees, except that His audience
weren't Pharisees.

5 June 1912

The Master has begun to pose for me. He had said: "Can you paint
Me in a half hour?"

"A half hour, my Lord?" I stammered, appalled. I can never finish
a head in less than two weeks.

"Well, I will give you three half hours. You mustn't waste My time,
Juliet."

He told me to come to Him Saturday morning, 1 June, at
seven-thirty.

I went in a panic. He was waiting for me in the entrance hall, a
small space in the English basement where the light--not much of
it--comes from the south. In fact I found myself faced with every
kind of handicap. I always paint standing, but now I was obliged
to sit, jammed so close to the window (because of the lack of
distance between the Master and me) that I couldn't even lean back.
No light. No room. And I had brought a canvas for a life-size head.

The Master was seated in a dark corner, His black 'aba melting into
the background; and again I saw Him as the Face of God, and
quailed. How could I paint the Face of God?

"I want you," He said, "to paint My Servitude to God."

"Oh my Lord," I cried, "only the Holy Spirit could paint Your
Servitude to God. No human hand could do it. Pray for me, or I am
lost. I implore You, inspire me."

"I will pray," He answered, "and as you are doing this only for the
sake of God, you will be inspired."

And then an amazing thing happened. All fear fell away from me and
it was as though Someone Else saw through my eyes, worked through
my hand.

All the points, all the planes in that matchless Face were so clear
to me that my hand couldn't put them down quickly enough, couldn't
keep pace with the clarity of my vision. I painted in ecstasy, free
as I had never been before.

At the end of the half hour the foundation of the head was perfect.

On Monday again I went to the Master at seven-thirty. As I got off
the bus at Seventy-Eighth Street and Riverside Drive I saw Him at
the centre of a little group standing beside that strip of park
that drops low to the river--the part we love to call "His garden",
a forever hallowed spot to us, for there we sometimes walk with Him
in the evenings, there He takes His daily exercise, or escapes from
the house to rest and pray.

The people who were with Him this morning were Nancy Sholl and Ruth
Berkeley, Mr MacNutt and Mr Mills, and, as I hurried to join them,
I saw that the Master was anointing them from a vial of attar of
rose.

Oh the heavenly perfume, the pale, early-morning sunshine and the
Master, all in white glistening in it (no one else takes the
sunlight as He does: He is like a polished mirror to the sun), the
ecstatic, intoxicating love with which He rubbed our foreheads with
His strong fingers dripping with that essence of a hundred roses!

Soon we saw Miss Buckton crossing the street toward us, bringing
with her a tall young man with a remarkable face, very pure and
serene, which seemed somehow familiar to me. The Master abruptly
left us and met the two in the middle of the Drive. Then I saw Him
open His arms wide and clasp the young man to His breast.

We all followed the Master to His house, where the young man was
introduced to me, and then I knew why his face had seemed familiar.
He was Walter Hempden. I had seen him in the theatre. I was in the
audience, he on the stage playing the part of "the Servant" in The
Servant in the House: Christ. And he played it so intensely, with
such spiritual fervour, that I prayed with all my

[Photograph of 'Abdu'l-Baha in His "garden" on Riverside Drive in
New York, 1912.]

heart, there in the audience, that he might some day meet the real
"Servant!"118

12 June 1912

Yesterday morning I went up early to the Master's house, that house
whose door is open at seven-thirty and kept wide open till
midnight.

He had been away and I had not seen Him for three days. I had
brought my pastels, thinking He might sit for me, but I found Him
looking utterly spent. He was in the English basement, Ruth
Berkeley and Valiyu'llah Khan with Him, lying back against the sofa
cushions. But, in spite of His weariness, He looked up with
brilliant eyes.

"What do you want of Us, Juliet?" He smiled.

I had hid my pastels. "Only to be near You."

"You must excuse Me from sitting for you today. I am not able
today."

"I knew that, my Lord, as soon as I came in."

Then He talked to Ruth and me. He told us we were as babes nursing
at the Divine Breast. "But babes," He said, "grow daily through the
mother's milk."

I could not help but weep, for His was the Divine Breast.

Soon He went out alone to "the garden", leaving Ruth, Valiyu'llah
Khan, and me together.

"It is wonderful," Ruth said as He went, "to see how the world is
quickened today in all directions."

"And to know," I said, "that the Voice that is quickening it is the
same tender Voice that spoke to us just now." And I wept again, for
something about the Master that morning had utterly melted me.

Later He came back. The English basement was crowded by then and
He talked for a long while to the people. But this I could see was
pure sacrifice. His vitality seemed gone. At times He could
scarcely bring forth the words, yet He gave and gave. When He had
finished He hurriedly left the house and went again to "His
garden".

On the way to the bus I met Him returning alone. He stopped me, put
out His hand and took mine, with indescribable tenderness smiling
at me. In the handclasp, the look, even in the tilt of the head was
a Love so poignant as to give me pain.

"Come tomorrow and paint, Juliet," He said.

He appeared refreshed--better--but remembering His utter depletion
of the morning I couldn't help answering, "If You are well." Then
I thought I would speak in Persian to amuse Him, but instead of
saying, "If Your health is good," I made a mistake and said, "Agar
Shuma khub ast," (If You are good.) whereupon I was covered with
confusion. I must have amused Him!

How stupidly we speak to Him! Imagine saying "if" to Him. That was
even worse than my break in Persian.

__________

That night there was a meeting at the Kinneys', one of those deadly
"Board meetings", but the Master came to it.

Striding up and down like a king, He spoke to us. In these
meetings, He said, we should be in connection

with the Supreme Concourse. Between the Supreme Concourse and us
there should be telegraphic communication, one end of the wire in
the breast of each one here and the other in that Concourse on
high, so that all we might say or do would be inspired.

__________

Today (12 June) I went up early to His house, but not early enough.
As I turned into Seventy-Eighth Street from West End Avenue I saw
Him a block away, hastening toward "His garden", His robes floating
out as He walked.

Soon He came back to us. Miss Buckton had arrived by that time and
a poor little waif of a girl, a Jewess. She was all in black and
her small pale face was very careworn.

I had been in the kitchen with Lua. When I heard the voice of the
Master I hurried into the hall, and there I saw them sitting at the
window, the poor sad little girl at the Master's right, Alice
Buckton at His left. Like a God, He dominated the scene. Sunlight
streamed through the window, His white robes and turban shining in
it, the strong carving of His Face thrown into high relief by
masses of shadow.

The little Jewish girl was crying.

"Don't grieve now, don't grieve," He said. He was very, very still
and I think He was calming her.

"But my brother has been in prison for three years, and it wasn't
just to put him in prison. It wasn't his fault, what he did. He was
weak and other people led him. He has to serve four more years. My
father and mother are always depressed. My brother-in-law has just
died, and he was the on who supported us. Now we haven't even
that."

"You must trust in God," said the Master.

"But the more I trust the worse things become!" she sobbed.

"You have never trusted."

"But my mother is all the time reading psalms. She doesn't deserve
to have God abandon her. I read the psalms myself, the ninety-first
psalm and the twenty-third psalm, every night before I go to bed.
I pray too."

"To pray is not to read psalms. To pray is to trust in God and to
be submissive in all things to Him. Be submissive; then things will
change for you. Put your parents and your brother in God's hands.
Love God's Will. Strong ships are not conquered by the sea, they
ride the waves! Now be a strong ship, not a battered one."

At noon I took Percy Grant to the Master. The Master had inquired
for him and sent him a message by me, and Percy had responded
instantly by himself suggesting this visit. But the Master was out
when we reached the house and while we were waiting for Him I
mentioned a very interesting thing He had said to Gifford
Pinchot:[119] that the people were rising wave upon wave, like a
great tide, and the capitalists, unless they realized this soon,
would be driven out with violence; also, that in the future the
labourer would not work on a wage basis but for an interest in the
concern.

Just then Lua appeared at the door of the room opposite, went to
the stairway and, with her beautiful reverence, leaned across the
rail to look down.

"He is coming, Lua?"

"Yes, Julie, He is coming!"

He entered the room with both hands extended and in

a voice like a chime from His heart, said: "Oh-h, Dr Grant! Dr
Grant!"

Then I slipped out.

When I returned at the Master's call, He was signing a photograph
for Percy and writing a prayer on it. "And now," he said,
presenting it, "you must give Me your photograph. I want your face.
I have given you Mine. Now you must give Me yours."

"I will pray for you," He added as He bade Percy goodbye. "I will
mention you daily in My prayers."

The Master detained me for a moment. As I rejoined Percy in the
car, Valiyu'llah Khan was just going into the house.

"Do you see that handsome, distinguished-looking young man?" I
said. "That is Valiyu'llah Khan, a descendant of two generations
of martyrs and the brother of one very young martyr. His
grandfather, Sulayman Khan, was a disciple of the Bab. He was
Governor of Fars and a great prince, but that didn't save him. He
suffered the most ghastly kind of martyrdom and with such ecstasy
that he is one of the best beloved of the Babi martyrs.

"Just a few years ago Valiyu'llah's father, Varqa Khan, and his
little brother, [Ruhu'llah] Varqa, went on a pilgrimage to 'Akka
and had a wonderful visit with the Master. But on their way home
they were both arrested and thrown into prison. Then one day some
brutal men came into their cell, one with an axe. Varqa Khan was
hacked into pieces alive, and the poor little boy forced to look
on at that butchery. When it was over, one of the executioners
turned to the child. I think I will tell the rest in Valiyu'llah
Khan's own language, just as he told it to me.

"'The man said to my brother: "If you will deny Baha'u'llah, we
will take you to the court of the Shah and honours and riches will
be heaped upon you." But my brother answered: "I do not want such
things." Then the man said to him: "If you refuse to deny, we will
kill you worse than your father." "You may kill me a thousand times
worse," my brother said. "Is my life of more value than my
father's? To die for Baha'u'llah is my supreme desire." 'This so
angered the executioners that they fell upon Varqa and choked him
to death.' Varqa was only twelve years old.

"A day or two ago," I went on, "Valiyu'llah Khan asked me, 'How is
the Master's portrait progressing?' and he added that, in a
portrait, he thought 'one must paint the soul.' 'But who can paint
the soul of 'Abdu'l-Baha I asked. And I wish you could have seen
the fire in his eyes as he drew himself up and said: 'We can paint
it with our blood!'"

13 June 1912

The next day, 13 June, as usual I went very early to the Master's
house--so early that no one was there--I mean, no visitors. Some
of the Persians of course were with Him: Valiy'u'llah Khan, Ahmad
and Mirza 'Ali-Akbar. I found them in the lower hall, the English
basement. The Master was sitting in the big chair by the window.
He called me to a seat opposite, then began to speak, smiling.

"Juliet is absolutely truthful. For this I love her very much. She
conceals nothing from me."

"It would be useless, my Lord," I said, "to try to conceal anything
from You. I could hide nothing."

"That is true," said the Master, raising one hand. "Nothing;
nothing."

Soon He rose. "Stay here," He told me, and went out with Ahmad.

By the time He returned a crowd had gathered. He gave a few private
interviews upstairs, then came down and, sitting by the window,
talked to all the people. I think the strongest image in my mind
is and will always be the holy figure of the Master sitting in the
rays of the sun at that window.

The meeting over, a few of us went upstairs to say a healing prayer
for Mrs Hinkle-Smith, but just before Lua began to chant, the
Master looked in at the door and called: "Juliet," and I happily
deserted Mrs Hinkle-Smith.

"Bring your things in here and paint," He said, pointing to the
library.

Oh, these sittings: so wonderful, yet so humanly difficult! We move
from room to room, from one kind of light to another. The Master
has given me three half hours, each time in a different room, and
each time people come in and watch me. But the miraculous thing is
that nothing makes any difference. The minute I begin to work the
same rapture takes possession of me. Someone Else looks through my
eyes and sees clearly; Someone Else works through my hand with a
sort of furious precision.

On this thirteenth of June, after Lua had chanted the prayer for
Mrs Hinkle-Smith, she and May came into the library, crossed over
to where I was sitting and stood behind me.

The Master looked up and smiled at May. "You have a kind heart, Mrs
Maxwell." Then He turned to Lua. "You, Lua, have a tender heart.
And what kind of heart

have you, Juliet?" He laughed. "What kind of a heart have you?"

"Oh, what kind of heart have I? You know, my Lord. I don't know."

"An emotional heart." He laughed again and rolled His hands one
round the other in a sort of tempestuous gesture. "You will have
a boiling heart, Juliet. Now," He continued, "if these three hearts
were united into one heart--kind, tender and emotional--what a
great heart that would be!"

14 June 1912

The next morning, Thursday, though I went unusually early to the
Master, He had already left the house. But Lua, Valiyu'llah Khan,
and I had a wonderful morning. Valiyu'llah told us so many things.

"My father," he said, "spent much time with the Blessed Beauty. The
Blessed Beauty Himself taught him.

"One time when my father was in His room, Baha'u'llah rose and
strode back and forth till the very walls seemed to shake. And He
told my father that once in an age the Mighty God sent a Soul to
earth endowed with the power of the Great Ether, and that such a
Soul had all power and was able to do anything. 'Even this walk of
Mine' said Baha'u'llah, 'has an effect in the world.'

"Then He said that His Holiness Jesus Christ had also come with the
power of the Great Ether, but the haughty priesthood of His day
thought of Him as a poor, unlettered youth and believed that if
they should crucify Him, His Teachings would soon be forgotten.
Therefore they did crucify Him. But because His Holiness Jesus
possessed the power of the Great Ether, He could not remain

underground. This ethereal power rose and conquered the whole
earth. 'And now,' the Blessed Beauty said, 'look to the Master, for
this same Power is His.'

"Baha'u'llah," added Valiyu'llah Khan, "taught my father much about
Áqa. Áqa (the Master, you know) is one of the titles of
'Abdu'l-Baha and the Greatest Branch is another, and the Greatest
Mystery of God another. By all these we call Him in Persian. The
Blessed Perfection, Baha'u'llah, revealed the Station of
'Abdu'l-Baha to my father. And my father wrote many poems to the
Master, though the Master would scold him and say: 'You must not
write such things to Me.' But the heart of my father could not keep
quiet. This is one poem he wrote:

__________

'O Dawning-Point of the Beauty of God, I know Thee! Though Thou
shroudest Thyself in a thousand veils, I know Thee! Though Thou
shouldst assume the tatters of a beggar, still would I know Thee!'

__________

In the late afternoon I returned with my mother. The Master
received us in His own room, which was full of roses and lilies and
carnations.

"Ah-h! Mrs Thompson. Marhaba! Marhaba!" (Welcome! Welcome!)

The intonation of that "Marhaba" can never be described. It is a
welcome from a heart which is a channel for God's heart.

He was very playful with Mamma. "Are you pleased

with Juliet? Pleased now, Mrs Thompson? The next time you have to
complain of her, come and complain to Me and I will beat her!"

15 June 1912

On Friday, 15 June, I was with the Master alone for a while, and
I brought up the name of Percy Grant. "He didn't understand You the
other day, my Lord. He thinks that You teach asceticism, that the
spirit and the flesh are two separate things."

"That is not what I said," the Master replied. "I said that the
spiritual man and the materialist were two different beings. The
spirit is in the flesh."

5 July 1912

The Beloved Master's portrait is finished. He sat for me six times,
but I really did it in the three half hours He had promised me; for
the sixth time, when He posed in His own room on the top floor, I
didn't put on a single stroke. I was looking at the portrait
wondering what I could find to do, when He suddenly rose from his
chair and said: "It is finished." The fifth time He sat, Miss
Souley-Campbell came in with a drawing she had done from a
photograph to ask if He would sign it for her and if she might add
a few touches from life. This meant that He had to change His pose,
so of course I couldn't paint that day. And the fourth time (the
nineteenth of June)--who could have painted then?

I had just begun to work, Lua in the room sitting on a couch
nearby, when the Master smiled at me; then turning to Lua said in
Persian: "This makes me sleepy. What shall I do?"

[Photograph: Portrait of 'Abdu'l-Baha painted by Juliet Thompson,
1912.]

"Tell the Master, Lua, that if He would like to take a nap, I can
work while He sleeps."

But I found that I could not. What I saw then was too sacred, too
formidable. He sat still as a statue, His eyes closed, infinite
peace on that chiselled face, a God-like calm and grandeur in His
erect head.

Suddenly, with a great flash like lightning He opened His eyes and
the room seemed to rock like a ship in a storm with the Power
released. The Master was blazing. "The veils of glory", "the
thousand veils", had shrivelled away in that Flame and we were
exposed to the Glory itself.

Lua and I sat shaking and sobbing.

Then He spoke to Lua. I caught the words, "Munadiy-i 'Ahd." (Herald
of the Covenant.

Lua started forward, her hand to her breast.

"Man?" (I?) she exclaimed.

"Call one of the Persians. You must understand this."

Never shall I forget that moment, the flashing eyes of 'Abdu'l-Baha
the reverberations of His Voice, the Power that still rocked the
room. God of lightning and thunder! I thought.

"I appoint you, Lua, the Herald of the Covenant. And I AM THE
COVENANT, appointed by Baha'u'llah. And no one can refute His Word.
This is the Testament of Baha'u'llah. You will find it in the Holy
Book of Aqdas. Go forth and proclaim, 'This is THE COVENANT OF GOD
in your midst.'"

A great joy had lifted Lua up. Her eyes were full of light. She
looked like a winged angel. "Oh recreate me," she cried, "that I
may do this work for Thee!"

By now I was sobbing uncontrollably.

"Julie too," said Lua, not even in such a moment forgetful of me,
"wants to be recreated."

But the Master had shrouded Himself with His veils again, the
"thousand veils". He sat before us now in His dear humanity: very,
very human, very simple.

"Don't cry, Juliet," He said. "This is no time for tears. Through
tears you cannot see to paint."

I tried hard to hold back my tears and to work, but painting that
day was at an end for me.

The Master smiled lovingly.

"Juliet is one of My favourites because she speaks the truth to me.
See how I love the truth, Juliet. You spoke one word of truth to
Me and see how I have praised it!"

I looked up to smile in answer, and in gratitude, then was
overwhelmed again by that awful convulsive sobbing.

At this the Master began to laugh and, as He laughed and laughed,
the strangest thing happened. It was as if at each outburst He
wrapped Himself in more veils, so that now He looked completely
human, without a trace left of His superhuman majesty. Never had
I seen Him like this before and I never did afterward.

"I am going to tell you something funny," He said, adding in
English, "a joke".

"Oh tell it!" we begged; and now I was in a sort of hysteria,
laughing and crying at the same time.

"No. Not now. Paint."

But of course I couldn't paint.

Later, walking up and down, He laughed again.

"I am thinking of My joke," He explained.

"Tell it!" we pleaded.

"No, I cannot, for every time I try to tell it I laugh so I cannot
speak."

We got down on our knees, able at last to enter into His play, and
begged Him, "Please, please tell us." We were laughing on our
knees.

"No. Not now. After lunch."

But, alas, after lunch He went upstairs to His room, and we never
heard the Master's joke.

Perhaps, there wasn't any joke. Perhaps He had just found it
necessary, after that mighty Declaration, to bring us down to earth
again. He had revealed to us "The Apex of Immortality." He had
lifted us to a height from which we could see it. Now He, our
loving Shepherd, had carried us in His own arms back to our little
valley and put us where we belonged.

__________

In the early morning of 19 June, before the Master had called me
to paint Him, He had spoken to the people in the English basement.
On His way down the stairs from His room He passed Lua and me,
where we stood in the third-floor hall. We saw, and felt, as He
walked down the upper flight, a peculiar power in His step--as
though some terrific Force had possession of Him; a Force too
strong to be caged in the body, sparking through, almost escaping
His body, able to sunder it. I cannot begin to describe that
indomitable step, its fearful majesty, or the strange flashing of
His eyes. The sublime language of the Old Testament, words such as
these: "Who is this that cometh from Bozrah ... that treadeth the
wine-press in His fury?" faintly express what I saw as I watched
the Master descending those stairs. Unsmiling, He passes Lua and
me. Then He looked back, still unsmiling.

"Juliet is one of My favourites," He said.

__________

In the afternoon of that same day He sent Lua down to the waiting
people to "proclaim the Covenant"; then a

little later followed her and spoke Himself on the station of the
Centre of the Covenant, but not as He had done to Lua and me. The
blazing Reality of it He had revealed in His own Person to us. To
them He spoke guardedly, even deleting afterwards from our notes
some of the things He had said.

Still later that afternoon the Master had promised to sit for a
photograph. I had made the appointment myself with Mrs Kasebier,
a very wonderful photographer, to bring the Master to her studio,
but some people prevented His getting off in time. When they left,
He sent for me.

"I am ashamed," He said (while I nearly died at that word "ashamed"
from Him), "but I will go tomorrow. I had planned to leave for
Montclair tomorrow but I will stay until Friday for your sake."

"I can't bear, my Lord," I said, "to have You delay Your trip to
the country for this."

"No, I wish it," He answered.

"I have a confession to make, my Lord," I said. "I have been to Dr
Grant's house. It happened in this way: he asked if I would be the
bearer of his photograph to You and would I stop at the Rectory for
it on my way up to You. Then he invited me to come to breakfast.
That invitation I declined, but I could think of no excuse for
refusing to stop for the picture. So I did go. But I stayed only
five or ten minutes and his mother was with us all the time."

"Good, good," said the Master. "Going to his house was not good,
but since you have confessed it, Juliet, I am very much pleased.
When I look into your heart," He added, smiling, "I find it just
like that mirror--it is so pure."

(Oh, please understand me, when I repeat such things it is only
because they are His words to me. I keep them just to remind myself
of something potential He sees in me which I must grow up to. I am
not reminding myself of His praise, for it really isn't praise but
stimulation. If He had been blaming me, I would repeat His blame
too.

He then spoke of my teaching. "Your breath is effective," He said.
"You are now in the Kingdom of Abha with Me, as I wished you to
be."

20 June 1912

The next day, 20 June, we went to Mrs Kasebier's--Lua, Mrs
Hinkle-Smith, and I--in the car with the Master.

I shall never forget the Master's beauty in the strange cold light
of her studio, a green, underwater sort of light, in which He
looked shining and chiselled, like the statue of a god. But the
pictures are dark shadows of Him.

21 June 1912

On 21 June, the Master left for Montclair to stay nine days. I was
with Him all day till He went. I had lunched with Him nearly every
day that week. Lua, Mrs Hinkle-Smith, Valiyu'llah Khan, and I bade
Him goodbye on the steps of His house. Montclair

23 June 1912

It had nearly killed Lua not to be taken to Montclair with Him. Two
days later she said to me: "Let's go to see Him, Julie."

"How can we, Lua? He didn't invite us," I answered. "He bade us
goodbye for nine days."

"Oh but you have an excuse, those proofs of Mrs Kasebier's
pictures. You really should show them to Him, Julie."

And she whirled Georgie Ralston and me off to Montclair with her.

We were punished of course, and our first punishment was that lunch
was unusually late (so that instead of arriving after, as we had
planned, we arrived just in time for it). And this was agonizing,
for there weren't enough seats at the table, and the Master
wouldn't sit down to eat. One of us had to occupy His chair, while
He Himself waited on us, carrying all the courses around and around
that table. I couldn't get over my mortification.

At the end He came in with the fruit, a glass bowl full of golden
peaches. Without turning His head--His face was set straight before
Him--He sent a piercing glance from the corner of His eye toward
Lua and me. Such a majestic, stern glance, like a sword-thrust.

After lunch, and this was our second punishment, He banished the
three of us--Georgie, Lua, and me--leading us to a small back porch
and abandoning us there. But before very long He returned and asked
us to take a walk with Him.

We came back from our walk by way of the front porch. Some people
were gathered there and Lua, Georgie, and I sat down with them
while the Master went upstairs to rest. He joined us, however, very
soon and, striding up and down, began to talk to us. As He walked
His Power shook us; His intoxicating exhilaration, pouring into me,
filled me up with new life.

His eyes--those eyes of light, which seem to be always looking into
heaven and when for an instant they glance toward earth, veer away
at once, back to heaven--were brilliantly restless. His whole Being
was restless with the same strange Force I had felt on that
memorable day, the nineteenth of June. It was as though

the lightning of His Spirit could scarcely endure to be harnessed
to the body. He was almost out of the body. But soon He took a seat
and rested quietly.

I showed Him the proofs of the pictures, then spoke of Mrs
Kasebier--who had seen Him only once, when she photographed Him.
"She said she would like to live near You, my Lord."

He laughed. "She doesn't want to live near Me. She only wants a
good time!" Then He grew serious. "To live near Me," He said, "one
must have My aims and objects. Do you remember the rich young man
who wanted to live near Christ, and when he learned what it cost
to live near Him--that it meant to give away all his possessions
and take up a cross and follow Christ--then," the Master laughed,
"he fled away!"[120]

"Among the disciples of the Bab," He continued, "were two: His
amanuensis and a firm believer. On the eve of the Bab's martyrdom
the firm believer prayed: 'Oh let me die with You!' The amanuensis
said: 'What shall I do?'

"'What shall I do?'" mocked the Master. "'What do you want me to
do?' The disciple died with the Bab, his head on the breast of the
Bab, and their bodies were mingled in death. The other died in
prison anyway, but think of the difference in their stations!

"There was another martyr," continued the Master after a moment,
"Mirza 'Abdu'llah of Shiraz." Then He told us that Mirza 'Abdu'llah
had been in the Presence of Baha'u'llah only once, "but he so loved
the Blessed Beauty" that he could not resist following Him to

Tihran, though Baha'u'llah had commanded him to remain in Shiraz
with his old parents. "Still," said the Master, His tone exultant,
"he followed!"

Mirza 'Abdu'llah reached Tihran in the midst of that bloodiest of
massacres resulting from the attempt on the Shah's life by two
fanatical Babis. Baha'u'llah had been cast into a dungeon. There,
in that foul cellar He sat, weighted down by "The Devil's Chain",
eleven disciples sitting with Him, bound by the same chain. In it
were set iron collars which were fastened around the neck by iron
pins. Every day a disciple was slaughtered and none knew when his
turn would come. The first intimation he had of his immediate death
was when the jailer took out the iron pin from his collar.

Mirza 'Abdu'llah entered Tihran and inquired of the guard at the
gate "where Baha'u'llah resided." "We will take you to Him," said
the guard. And some men took 'Abdu'llah to the dungeon and chained
him to Baha'u'llah.

"So," the Master said, "he found his Beloved again!"

One day the jailer came into the dungeon and took out the pin from
Mirza 'Abdu'llah's collar.

"Then," said the Master, "Mirza 'Abdu'llah stepped joyfully
forward. First, he kissed the feet of the Blessed Beauty, and then
..."

The Master's whole aspect suddenly changed. It was as though the
spirit of the martyr had entered into Him. With that God-like head
erect, snapping His fingers high in the air, beating out a
drum-like rhythm with His foot till we could hardly endure the
vibrations set up, He triumphantly sang "The Martyr's Song".

"I have come again, I have come again,

By way of Shiraz I have come again!

With the wine cup in My hand!

Such is the madness of Love!"

"And thus," ended 'Abdu'l-Baha, "singing and dancing he went to his
death, and a hundred executioners fell on him! And later his
parents came to Baha'u'llah, praising God that their son had given
his life in the Path of God."

This was what the Cause meant then. This was what it meant to "live
near Him"! Another realm opened to me, the realm of Divine Tragedy.

The Master sank back into His chair. Tears swelled in my eyes,
blurring everything. When they cleared I saw a still stranger look
on His face. His eyes were unmistakably fixed on the Invisible.
They were filled with delight and as brilliant as jewels. A smile
of exultation played on His lips. So low that it sounded like an
echo He hummed the Martyr's Song.

"See," He exclaimed, "the effect that the death of a martyr has in
the world. It has changed My condition." After a moment's silence,
He asked: "What is it, Juliet, you are pondering so deeply?"

"I was thinking, my Lord, of the look on Your face when You said
Your condition had been changed. And that I had seen a flash of the
joy of God when someone dies happily for His Cause."

"There was one name," the Master answered, "that always brought joy
to the face of Baha'u'llah. His expression would change at the
mention of it. That name was Mary of Magdala."

West Englewood

29 June 1912

Almost a week passed before we saw our Lord again. Then, on the
twenty-ninth of June, we met Him at West Englewood. He was giving
a feast for all the believers in the grounds around Roy Wilhelm's
house, the "Feast of Unity" He called it.

I went with dear Silvia Gannett. We walked from the little station,
past the grove where the tables were set--a grove of tall pine
trees--and on to the house in which He was, He Whose Presence
filled our eyes with light and without Whom our days had been very
dim and lifeless.

Ah, there He was again! Sitting in a corner of the porch! I sped
across the lawn, forgetting Silvia, forgetting everything. He
looked down at me with grave eyes, and I saw a fathomless welcome
in them.

For a while we sat with Him on the porch. Then He led us down into
the grove. There He seated Himself on the ground at the foot of a
pine tree and called two believers to His right and left. One was
Mrs Krug in her very elegant clothes, the other a poor and shabby
old woman. But both faces, the wrinkled one and the smooth, pretty
one, were beautiful with the same radiance. I shall never forget
that old woman's shining blue eyes.

The great words He spoke to us then have been preserved.[121] I
will not repeat them. Besides I remember them too imperfectly. But
He said one thing which woke my whole being: "This is a New Day;
a New Hour."

By the time He had finished, the feast was ready, but just as it
was announced a storm blew up--a strange, sudden storm, without
warning. There was a tremen-

dous crash of thunder; through the treetops we could see black
clouds boiling up, and big drops of rain splashed on the tables.

The Master rose calmly and, followed by the Persians, walked out
to the road, then to the end of it where there is a crossroad. A
single chair had been left there and, as I watched from a distance,
I saw the Master take it and sit down, while the Persians ranged
themselves behind Him. I saw Him lift His face to the sky. He had
gone a long way from the house; thunder still crashed and the
clouds rolled frighteningly low, but He continued to sit perfectly
motionless, that sacred, powerful face upturned to the sky. Then
came a strong, rushing wind; the clouds began to race away; blue
patches appeared above and the sun shone out. And then the Master
rose and walked back into the grove. This I witnessed.

Later, as we sat at the tables, two hundred and fifty of us, He
anointed us all with attar of rose. I was not at a table but
sitting under a tree with Marjorie Morten and Silvia. The Master
swept toward us in His long white robes, forever the Divine
Shepherd.

"Friends here?" He smiled, "Friends?"

In His voice was a thrilling joy. With a look that shook my heart,
so full was it with the musk of His Love, He rubbed my face hard
with the attar of rose.

He passed among all the tables with His little vial of perfume
(which Grace Robarts swears was almost as full at the end as in the
beginning) anointing the forehead of every one there, touching and
caressing all our blind faces with His tingling fingers.

Then He disappeared for hours.

__________

Lua, too, went off alone, an exceedingly naughty purpose in her
mind. The Master had just told her that she

must leave very soon for California. So now she deliberately walked
in poison ivy, walked back and forth and back and forth till her
feet were thoroughly poisoned. "Now, Julie," she said (when the
deed was done) "He can't send me to California."

__________

To me the most beautiful scene of all came later, when the Master
returned to us after dark. About fifty or sixty people had
lingered, unable to tear themselves from Him. The Master sat in a
chair on the top step of the porch, some of us surrounding
Him--dear guilty Lua with her poisoned feet, May, Silvia, Marjorie,
and I and a young coloured man, Neval Thomas. Below us, all over
the lawn, on each side of the path, sat the others, the light
summer skirts of the women spread out on the grass, tapers in their
hands (to keep off mosquitoes). In the dark, in their filmy
dresses, they looked like great moths and the burning tips of the
tapers they waved like fireflies darting about.

Then the Master spoke again to us. I was standing behind Him, close
to Him, and before He began He turned and gave me a long, profound
look. His talk of that night has been recorded. It was a resounding
Call to us to arise from the tomb of self in this Day of the Great
Resurrection and unite around Him to vivify the world.

Before He had finished He rose from His chair and started down the
path still talking, passing between the dim figures on the grass
with their lighted tapers, talking till He reached the road, where
He turned and we could no longer see Him. Even then His words
floated back to us--the liquid Persian, 'Ali Quli Khan's beautiful,
quivering translation, like the sound of a violin string.

"Peace be with you," this was the last we heard, "I will pray for
you."

Oh that Voice that came back out of His invisibility when He had
passed beyond our sight. May I always remember, and hear the Voice.
New York

30 June 1912

That night our Beloved Lord returned to New York. The next morning
early I flew up to see Him, but He sent me at once to Lua, who was
staying with Georgie Ralston in a hotel nearby.

She was in bed, her feet terribly swollen from the poison ivy.

"Look at me, Julie," she said. "Look at my feet. Oh, please go
right back to the Master and tell Him about them and say: 'How can
Lua travel now?'"

I did it, returned to the Master's house, found Him in His room and
put Lua's question to Him. He laughed, then crossed the room to a
table on which stood a bowl of fruit, and, selecting an apple and
a pomegranate, gave them to me.

"Take these to Lua," He said. "Tell her to eat them and she will
be cured. Spend the day with her, Juliet."

Oh precious Lua--strange mixture of disobedience and obedience--and
all from love! I shall never forget her, seizing first the apple,
then the pomegranate and gravely chewing them all the way through
till not even a pomegranate seed was left: thoroughly eating her
cure, which was certain to send her to California.

In the late afternoon we were happily surprised by a visit from the
Master Himself. He drew back the sheet and looked at Lua's feet,
which by that time were beautifully slim. Then He burst out
laughing.

"See," He said, "I have cured Lua with an apple and a pomegranate."

But Lua revolted again. There was one more thing she could try, and
she tried it. The Master had asked me to

paint her portrait and I had already had one sitting. The following
day, at the Master's house, she drew me aside.

"Please, Julie, do something else for me. Go to the Master, now,
and say: 'If Lua is in California, how can I paint her?'"

I went straight to His room with Valiyu'llah Khan to translate. "My
Lord," I said, "You have commanded me to paint Lua. If she is in
California and I here, how can I do it? The portrait is begun; how
can I finish it?"

Again the Master burst out laughing, for this of course was too
transparent.

"In a year," He said, "Lua will join Me in Egypt. She will stay in
New York a few days on her way to Me and you can paint her then,
Juliet."

So poor Lua had to go to California. There was no way out for
her.[122]

4 July 1912

On the fourth of July, yesterday, Mamma had her birthday dinner
with the Master. He was so sweet to her. When we first arrived we
found Him in the English basement and He led Mamma to the sofa and,
with that wonderful freedom of His, drew her down beside Him.

Carrie Kinney, Georgie Ralston, and I were sitting across the room
by the window and I'm afraid we did look solemn, for we sat in a
row, perfectly silent.

"Look at them!" said Mamma, laughing. "They are jealous of me!"

"Then we will make them more jealous!" arid the

Master seized Mamma's hand and drew her still closer, at which she
looked really scared!

Now I felt compelled to speak. "Three years ago, my Lord, on the
fourth of July, Carrie, and I were with You in 'Akka and You took
us to the Holy Shrine of Baha'u'llah. I never expected to keep that
anniversary with You in New York."

At the table the Master joked with Mamma because she was eating so
little. "I perceive that you are an angel, Mrs Thompson. Angels do
not eat."

"The Master sees I am not an angel," I laughed, "for I eat every
morsel He puts on my plate."

"I perceive that you are a very clever girl. Mrs Thompson," He
continued, "is going home to a luscious supper and saving her
appetite for that."

Passing me a dish with three very shrivelled dates on it, He said:
"Here, Juliet, are the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost."

And I ate them up!

A little later Mamma said, looking at the Master with her sweet
shyness: "You are very kind to me."

"God knows the degrees of it," He sighed deeply.

__________

While we sat with Him after dinner, He spoke of tests. "Even the
sword," He said, "is no test to the Persian believers. They are
given a chance to recant; they cry out instead: 'Ya Baha'u'l-Abha!'
Then the sword is raised,"--He shot up His arm as though
brandishing a sword--"they cry out all the more 'Ya Baha'u'l-Abha!'
But some of the people here are tested if I don't say 'How do you
do?'"

12 July 1912

I have almost no time to write these days, as I spend most of them
with the Beloved Master and when I try to write after dinner, my
darling little mother stops me too soon. Her room is at right
angles with mine and at ten o'clock she calls through her window:
"Put out your light, baby." But there are three or four lovely
things that I must tell.

On Monday, 9 July, the Master invited me, with the Persians to go
to the Natural History Museum. It was a broiling afternoon and I
couldn't imagine why He should want to go to that Museum, and in
the hottest part of the day. But wherever He went, there I wanted
to be.

When we reached the Ninth Avenue corner of the Museum the Master,
exhausted by that time, sank to a low stone ledge to rest. Between
us and the main door on the Central Park corner stretched a long
cross-town block in glaring sun, not a single tree on the sidewalk.

"My Lord," I said, "let me try to find a nearer entrance for You."
And I hurried along the grass, keeping close to the building,
searching the basement for a door. The employees' entrance was
locked. Just beyond stood a sign: "No Thoroughfare." I was rushing
past this when a shrill whistle stopped me, and I turned to face
the watchman of the grounds. He was a little bent old Jew with a
very kind face.

"Oh excuse me," I said, "for breaking the rules, but I must find
a nearer door than the main one. See Who is sitting on that ledge!
I must find it for Him."

The watchman turned and looked at the Master, look-

ed and looked, at that Figure from the East, from the Past--the
Days of the Old Testament--and his eyes became very soft. "Is He
a Jew?" he asked.

"A descendant of Abraham."

"Come with me," said the watchman. "Ask Him to come with me."

I went over and spoke to the Master and He rose and followed with
the Persians, I dropping back to walk with them. There was not a
nearer entrance, but the watchman, taking a risk perhaps, led us
across the grass, where at least it was cooler and the way shorter.

In the Museum we passed through a room in which a huge whale hung
from the ceiling. The Master looked up at it, laughed and said: "He
could hold seventy Jonahs!"

Then He took us straight to the Mexican exhibit, and this seemed
to interest Him very much. In the great elaborately carved glyphs
standing around the room He found traces of Persian art and pointed
them out to me. He told us this sculpture resembled very closely
the ancient sculpture of Egypt. "Only," He said, "this is better."
Then He took me over to the cases where He showed me purely Persian
bracelets.

"I have heard a tradition," I said, "that in the very distant past
this country and Asia were connected."

"Assuredly," answered the Master, "before a great catastrophe there
was such a connection between Asia and America."

After looking at everything in the Mexican rooms, He led us to the
front door and out into the grounds again. Then, stepping from the
stone walk to the grass, He seated Himself beneath a young birch
tree, His back to us, while we stood behind Him on the flags. He
sat there

a long time, silent. Was He waiting for someone? I wondered.

While He--waited?--the old Jewish watchman stole quietly up to me
from the direction of the Museum.

"Is He tired?" he whispered. "Who is He? He looks like such a great
man."

"He is 'Abdu'l-Baha of Persia," I said, "and He has been a great
Sufferer because of His work for the real Brotherhood of Man, the
uniting of all the races and nations."

"I should like to speak to Him," said the Jew. And I took him over
to the tree under which the Master still sat with His back to us.

At the sound of our footsteps He turned and looked up at the
watchman, His brilliant eyes full of sweetness. "Come and sit by
Me," He said.

"Thank You, Sir, but I am not allowed."

"Is it against the rules for Me to sit on the grass?"

The old man's eyes, softly shining, were fixed on the Master. "No,
You may sit there all day!"

But the Master rose and stood beneath the tree.

Such pictures as I see when the Master is in them could never be
put upon canvas--not even into words, except by the sublimest
poet--but I always want to try at least to leave a trace of their
beauty. The Master, luminous in the sunlight, His white robe
flowing to the grass, standing beside the white slender trunk of
the birch tree, with its leafy canopy over His head. The Jew
standing opposite Him--so bent, so old--his eyes, like a lover's,
humbly raised to the face of his own Messiah! As yet unrecognized,
his Messiah, yet his heart worshiped.

Eagerly he went on, offering all he could think of to this
Mysterious One Who had touched him so deeply.

"You didn't see the whole of the Museum. Would You like to go back
after You have rested? You didn't go up to the third floor."
(Unseen by us he must have been following all the time.) "The
fossils and the birds are up there. Wouldn't You like to see the
birds?"

The Master answered very gently, smiling.

"I am tired of travelling and looking at the things of this world.
I want to go above and travel and see in the spiritual worlds. What
do you think about that?" He asked suddenly, beaming on the old
watchman.

The watchman looked puzzled and scratched his head.

"Which would you rather posses," continued the Master, "the
material or the spiritual world?"

Still the old man pondered. At last he brought forth: "Well, I
guess the material. You know you have that, anyway."

"But you do not lose it when you have attained the spiritual world.
When you go upstairs in a house, you don't leave the house. The
lower floor is under you."

"Oh I see!" cried the watchman, his whole face lighting up, "I
see!"

After we parted from the watchman, who walked with us all the way
to the Ninth Avenue corner, leading us again across the grass, I
began to blame myself for not inviting him to the Master's house,
forgetting that the Master Himself had not done so. Every day I
meant to return to the Museum to tell the old man where the Master
lived, but I put off from day to day.

When, at the end of a week, I did run over to the Museum, I found
a young watchman there, who seemed to know nothing of the one he
had replaced.

Had our friend "gone upstairs?"

Why had the Master visited a Museum of Natural

History in the hottest hour of a blistering July day? Had He
instead visited a soul whose need was crying out to Him, to open
an old man's eyes so that he might see to climb the stairs, to take
away the dread of death?[123]

__________

On the tenth of July, I went to the Master in the early morning
with something in my heart to say, but already there were people
with Him and I saw no chance of talking privately.

"Come, Juliet, sit by Me," He called as I entered the room. "Now,
speak."

How could I, before those people? I hesitated.

"All your hopes and desires are destined to be fulfilled," He said,
"in the Kingdom of God."

This was my cue.

"I came to tell You, my Lord, that now I have only one desire, to
offer my heart for Your service."

"This you will also do, but all your desires will be fulfilled."

He kept me to lunch that day. While we were waiting in the English
basement for the lunch to be announced, Valiyu'llah Khan and I
alone with the Master, He spoke again of my "truthfulness".

"Oh," I prayed, "may I some day have all the virtues so that in
every way I can make you happy."

"But he who possesses truthfulness possesses all the virtues," said
the Master. Then He went on to tell us a story. "There was once a
disciple of Muhammad who

asked of another disciple, 'What shall I do to please God?' And the
other disciple replied: 'Do not kill. Do not steal. Do not covet,'
etc., etc., etc. A great many 'do nots'." the Master laughed. "He
asked still another, 'What shall I do to become nearer to God?' And
this one said: 'You must supplicate and pray. You must be generous.
You must be courageous,' etc., etc., etc. Then the disciple went
to 'Ali. 'What do you say I should do in order to please God and
to become nearer to Him?' 'One thing only: be truthful.'

"For," continued the Master, "if you are truthful, you cannot
commit murder. You would have to confess it! Neither can you steal.
You would have to confess it. So, if one is truthful, he possesses
all the virtues.

"I may tell you this," He said to me, and He told me a thing so
wonderful that, even to keep and cherish His words and read them
over in the time to come, I cannot repeat it here.

"My Lord," I said, "if ever I have told You an untruth it was
because I deceived myself."

"There are degrees of truth," He answered, "but that word of yours
which has so pleased Me was absolute, perfect, extraordinary
truth."

__________

That night we walked with Him in "His garden"--Georgie Ralston,
Mirza 'Ali Akbar, Valiyu'llah Khan, Ahmad, and I. Dear Lua, who has
not yet left for California, was ill and unable to be with us.

He led us down a path sloping to the river, flanked by tall
poplars. Sweeping on ahead in His gleaming white robes, He was like
a spirit. The night was very dark, the river and the Jersey
Palisades starred and glittering with lights and there were chains
of lights close to the water.

With a wave of the hand towards them He said: "If only the souls
of men could be thus illumined."

"It is You, my Lord," I said, as I followed close with Valiyu'llah
Khan and Ahmad, "Who put a torch to our souls and light them."

Suddenly out from behind the bushes rushed a crowd of children,
bursting upon us like little demons, capering around us and
hooting. Some of them even picked up stones and threw them. Then
they all began to sing: "Follow the Lord! The Lord leads on!"

Back to us floated the voice of the Master: "The people of the
world are blind. You must have vision. The people of the world are
heedless: see how heedless they are!" and He swept His hand toward
the children, who immediately melted back into the shadows as if
they had never really existed. "You must be aware. The people of
the world are steeped in darkness. You must be immersed in a sea
of light."

We went deep down in the park, close to the river; then turned,
climbed a path, and came out upon the street. Here there was a
stone wall, dividing the park from the sidewalk. The Master leaned
wearily on the wall and gazed far below to the river. He seemed to
be lost in meditation, His face profoundly sorrowful. I thought of
a picture, a poster, which, in the early days of His visit, had
been displayed on all the church doors: the Christ mourning over
the city.

Soon He continued His walk. I turned to Valiyu'llah Khan.

"Oh," I said, "if only I could realize throughout the whole fibre
of my being, feel with every nerve, every atom in me, His Divine
Reality, if only while in His bodily Presence I could be fully
aware of Who He is ..."

He turned and spoke and His face was ineffably gentle and holy and
something in His voice pierced me to the heart. He couldn't have
heard me with the outer ear--I had fallen too far behind and was
whispering, and in English--but how He answered me!

"They laugh at Me, yet My dress is the dress of Jesus, just the
same that He wore."

The people of the world: children! Had the Master Himself evoked
those little demons and made a sort of moving picture of them, to
show us what is to come as we "follow the Lord" in the dark night?

__________

But the very next day another picture, of very different children,
was superimposed upon this.

I had been with the Master all morning. (Later I will write of the
morning.) In the afternoon around three o'clock I returned with
Rhoda Nichols only to meet Him just going out with the Persians.
He smiled, then walked swiftly toward the river, but Ahmad,
dropping behind, called to Rhoda and me: "Come along with us to the
Harrises'." We should have known better than to go, for the Master
had not invited us, but we couldn't resist the temptation. So we
followed up Riverside Drive, then West End Avenue, till we came to
Ninety-Fifth Street, where Mr and Mrs Harris live. A tenement house
neighbourhood.

As we approached Ninety-Fifth Street, there we saw them: the
different children. There must have been nearly a hundred of them,
playing in the street with their hoops and balls. But, when the
Master drew near, all shining white in His long flowing robes, they
immediately stopped playing. It all happened instantaneously. The
next moment they had fallen into formation and were marching down
the street behind Him (we had

turned east toward Central Park), some of them still rolling their
hoops. Without one word they followed, their little faces almost
solemn. They made me think of a real and beautiful Children's
Crusade.

We came to the house where the Harrises live and walked up five
steep flights, but when Mrs Harris opened her apartment door and
Rhoda and I saw a table inside set only for the Master and the
Persians, we backed away terribly embarrassed and lost no time in
getting downstairs. After all, we couldn't have foreseen a luncheon
at three o'clock!

When we opened the street door, there were the children again,
surrounding the house, silently looking up at it. A little
yellow-haired girl came running up the stoop to me. She seemed to
be the spokesman for the others. Breathlessly she asked: "Please,
ma'am, tell us. Is He Christ?"

I sat down on the stoop while the whole crowd of children swarmed
and pushed around me. "I will tell you all about Him," I said. Then
I whispered to Rhoda: "Go upstairs again, dear, and let the Master
know what is happening."

She returned with a wonderful message from the Master, an
invitation to all the children to come to a feast to be given
specially for them at the Kinneys' house next Sunday.

__________

And now just a word about the morning. Georgie Ralston and Mrs
Brittingham, Lua, and I were together in the Master's room. As I
sat there I felt something of the Mystery of His Divinity. The day
was very hot and His sleeves were rolled up and I saw on His arms
the scars of chains.

When the others left He kept me.

"I come to Your Presence, my Lord," I said, "to be cured of my
spiritual ills."

"Your pure heart," the Master answered, "is a magnet for the Divine
feelings."

He spoke of my mother and sent her some fruit. "Your mother," He
said, "is very dear to me. You cannot imagine how I love your
mother."

Then He laughed and asked: "How is Dr Grant?"

"I don't know, my Lord. I haven't seen him. I'm afraid I hurt him
the last time we met."

"What did you do?"

"I refused to go into his house with him."

"How is he with Us?"

"I don't know."

"I want to see him. Is this possible?"

"Yes, I am sure. I will telephone to him."

"Tell him I am longing to see him, longing to see him," repeated
the Master smiling.

I knelt and kissed His robe, looking up so happy, so grateful,
while He looked down and laughed at me.

That night I telephoned to Percy. "I am the bearer of a message to
you," I said, "from the Master. He asked this morning if I had seen
you lately and said He wanted to see you. 'Tell Dr Grant I am
longing to see him,' He said."

"That was very beautiful of Him. Give Him my cordial greetings.
Tell him how happy I am that He thought of me. I can't tell you at
this moment, Juliet, when I can go. I hope tomorrow afternoon. I
have a wedding at half-past four. After that, perhaps."

"Well, I will give you the Master's telephone number and you can
call His house about it, unless you prefer to have me arrange it."

"I should rather do it through you."

Saying he would let me know in the morning, he bade me goodbye;
then, "I give you my loving salutations."

The next morning, however, when he called me up, he was in another
state of mind. "Tell the Master," he said, "I have so many human
engagements just now. I am going up to Greenwich after the wedding.
(Greenwich is Alice Flagler's home.) "But I want to run in to see
you this morning, if I may."

I went to my room and prayed. I was on my knees when he came. Not
that he found me on them!

"To come straight to the point, Percy," I said, "I hope you will
go to see the Master."

"I'm going to see the Master, only I can't today."

"Oh that is all right," I said, brightening. "I didn't understand."

We talked about other things and then Katherine Berwind dropped in.
Percy spent the morning with us, leaving us for a little while to
return with bottles of ginger ale and grape juice which he mixed
into a drink for us. When he finally left about noon I followed him
out of the studio.

"What message have you," I asked, "for the Master?"

He swore! It was a very mild swear, but he coupled the Master's
name with it, so I can't repeat it.

"I believe you love Him," he said fiercely, "more than anything on
earth."

"I do."

"More than your art," he added quickly.

"But of course."

"Well, you shouldn't. With your talent, Juliet, you could do
immortal work. Do you never think of that?"

"I am thinking of His immortal work in us."

"He has done it, in you!"

"Not yet."

"Juliet, I have wanted to co-operate with Him. You know that. But
I don't believe He can do this thing alone."

"I believe He is perfectly able to do it alone."

"You do?"

"He changes the hearts and nobody else can do that. Well, what
message shall I take to Him?"

"Tell Him with my greeting that I will come up some time to see
Him, but I am out of town a great deal, most of the time, and--"

"Can't you do any better than that?" I asked.

"I want to do something for His comfort and when Mr Flagler's yacht
comes back I want to take Him up the Hudson. I will be in town
Friday, Juliet."

"Then come up on Friday to see Him with me. Please come. You know
I don't often persist, but this time--forgive me if I do."

"I think it is beautiful of you to persist in this instance,
Juliet." With the face of a martyr he kissed my hand. "I will come
Friday."

And, looking unspeakably miserable, he left me.

__________

On Friday in the afternoon he stopped for me. We were expecting the
Master in the evening--He was to bless our house with a visit--and
at the moment Percy arrived I was telephoning Marjorie, who had
offered to bring some light refreshment. Percy, sitting in the
living room, heard. But I couldn't invite him, for I knew it would
spoil Mamma's evening with the Master--she mightn't even come into
the room.

While I was putting on my gloves Percy produced a large and ornate
pocketbook. "Juliet," he said, "here is an empty pocketbook which
someone brought me from Italy. Will you accept it? I thought you
might have in mind some Oriental person to whom you would like to
give it."

When we started out he proposed going up in a cab, but I objected
on the grounds that it would be slow and we were already half an
hour late.

"I am bringing the Master down here at six and you would have no
visit at all if we took a slow cab."

"Well, for the matter of that, Juliet"--and his upper lip grew very
stiff--"any visit I might pay would be merely an expression of
affection and courtesy. As for all you could get from a visit of
this sort, where conversation must be through an interpreter and
'Abdu'l-Baha will go off into a monologue on some subject that
interests Him--well, as I said, it is merely a mark of courtesy."

__________

I never saw his mouth so stubborn as when we entered the Master's
house. The Master was waiting for us, sitting in the bay window of
the English basement.

"Marhaba, Dr Grant! It is a long time since I have seen you, a long
time."

But His welcome was more reserved than it had been before.

"Well, Dr Grant," He said, after a moment, "what is the very latest
news, the very latest?"

Remembering Percy's remark, that the Master always indulged in
monologue, I couldn't help smiling at this.

"The latest news," said Percy with a wicked look, as

obstinate, pugnacious and self-confident as I have ever seen, "is
in the field of athletics."

"The Olympic games?" asked the Master.

"Yes," said Percy, surprised.

"You know," the Master went on, "that these games originated in
ancient Greece and it was a necessity of that time to develop the
body to its fullest strength, the nations being constantly at
warfare and the men wearing armour and fighting hand to hand. Heavy
swords had to be driven through coats of mail; bodies had to be
strengthened to endure the mail."

"But explain to the Master," said Percy, very much de haut en bas,
"that because of the people all centring in the cities and thus
depleting their constitutions, the necessity for physical
development is just as great now as it was then, though the basis
is different."

The Master answered with the utmost sweetness: "We do not deprecate
physical development, for the sound mind should work through a
sound body, but We think that the people of the West are too much
concerned with mere physical development. They forget the need of
spiritual development."

But Percy was bent upon argument. The development of the spirit,
he maintained, could not even begin till the body had first been
built up; and he looked so absurdly condescending, so pompous, so
sure of his power to defeat the Master, that I could scarcely
control my mirth. The Master did not control His.

"Man thinks too much of perfecting the body," He smiled
delightfully, "but of what use is it to him without the perfecting
of the spirit? No matter how much he develops his muscles and
sinews he will never

become as strong as the ox, as brave as the lion or as big as the
elephant! Physically he is an animal, yet inferior to the animals,
for animals acquire their sustenance with the greatest ease,
whereas man has to toil incessantly, to labour with infinite pain,
for a mere livelihood. So, in the physical realm, the beast is
nobler than man. But man is distinguished from the beast by his
spiritual gifts and these he should develop with the other, both
together. There should be the perfect balance, the spiritual and
the physical. A man whose ideal side only is developed is also
imperfect. We do not deprecate comfort. If I could find a better
house than this I would certainly move into it. But man should not
think of comfort alone."

I looked at Percy. He was still like a fighting-cock, ready for
another bout. He would never give in before me, I knew, so I
slipped quietly into the kitchen. When I returned the whole
atmosphere had changed. His face had softened, his stiff mouth
relaxed. As I entered the room the Master was saying: "When one
prays, one sometimes has divine glimpses. So, when one is
spiritually developed, a sublimity of nature is obtained, a
delicacy of vision such as could not otherwise be found. Not only
this, but tranquillity and happiness are secured.

"Do you think if it had not been for spiritual assurance I could
have been happy all those years in prison? Think of it, forty
years! You have just been telling me, Dr Grant, that forty years
is the average American life. I spent My American life in prison.
Yet all that time I was on the heights of happiness. Many believers
in Persia have been forced to give up

everything: their possessions, their families, and, in the end,
their lives, but they never lost their happiness.

"Remember Christ, when they placed the crown of thorns on His head.
At that very moment, as the thorns wounded His brow, He looked down
the vista of the centuries and beheld innumerable kings bowing
their jewelled crowns low before that crown of thorns. Do you think
He did not know, that He could not foresee?" (Again I stole a
glance at Percy. He looked utterly melted now and his eyes shone.)
"When they spat in the face of Christ," the Master went on, "when
they made a mock procession and carried Him around the streets, He
felt no humiliation."

Just then I rose to go, first asking permission, with my eyes, of
the Master, Percy was not inclined to go, even when we were on our
feet. In spite of that momentary softening--perhaps partly because
of it--he still wanted to stay and argue and I could hardly tear
him away.

While we were standing, he swung the master's divine subject to a
combative one, "the Occident versus the Orient": that was the
substance of it. And if ever I saw the Occident embodied, it was
at that moment in that man.

The Master leaned close to him and with the utmost gentleness and
patience tried to appeal to him. The people of the East, He said,
were content with less than the people here, so their hours of work
were shorter. He touched too on the absence of suicide in the
Orient.

When He spoke of suicide, and also while He described the
humiliations heaped on Christ, which could not humiliate Him, I had
a strange sense of impending tragedy for Percy Grant, of something
dreadful to happen

in the future in which he would utterly "lose his happiness" and
would feel humiliation, when perhaps these words of the Master
would come back to him.[124]

On the way down in the cab the Master talked about economics. "The
most important of the questions here," He said, "is the economic
question. Until that is first solved nothing can be done. But if
it should not be solved there will be riots."

Percy spoke of democracy.

"But your poor man," the Master replied, "cannot even think of
economics; he is so overburdened."

I asked Percy to tell about his work and when he had done so, with
some hesitation (for he seldom speaks of himself), the Master said
sweetly: "May you make peace here. May you unite the classes."

Whereupon Percy's face beamed.

But he steeled himself again and at my door he turned to go, though
I did invite him in, and the Master also said: "Are you not coming
in?"

"No, no," and he hurried away, with a huffy look.

I can still see the Master on my steps, so in command.

"Au revoir, Dr Grant," He said.

Percy had mentioned the yacht trip to the Master and asked if He
could make it the following Monday, but the

Master had several appointments Monday and could not accept for
that day.

"I will try," said Percy, "to get the yacht for Tuesday."

The Master had planned to spend the whole evening with us and we
were all to go for a walk, but the Persians had forgotten to
announce at the Seventy-Eighth Street house that He would be absent
Friday evening, so He felt He must return early.

__________

My Lord came into our house. The door was not locked. He opened it
Himself and walked up the stairs. It was His house. Mamma almost
ran to meet Him, her face suffused with joy, her eyes shy and
tender. The MacNutts and the Goodalls had arrived and Ruth Berkeley
and Marjorie, and were waiting in the second-floor living room. The
Master went in and greeted them with His wonderful buoyant
greeting; then I took Him to my room to rest and, after kneeling
and kissing the hem of His garment, left Him lying on my couch.

While He was resting Kahlil Gibran came. He had a private talk with
the Master in my room; then joined us upstairs in the studio, to
which we had all gone by that time, and in a very few minutes the
Master too joined us.

Mamma, with her own loving hands, had prepared the studio for His
reception and it was very beautiful, full of laurel, white roses,
and lighted white candles.

"What a good room," said the Master as He entered it. "It is like
an Oriental room--so high. If I were to build a house here," He
laughed, "I would build an eclectic house--partly Oriental, partly
Occidental."

Then we passed the refreshments and our Beloved Lord "broke bread"
with us.

__________

(Footnote. Of course I was terribly disappointed that the Master
stayed such a short time that night. A few days later I began to
see that this was no accident, that the changing of His plan for
that evening had not been just a result of the Persians'
forgetfulness, but that in it was a deep and subtle lesson for me.
A lesson in perception--or intuition--which is truth itself. I had
asked the Master whom I should invite to meet Him. "Anyone you
think of," He answered. "Whatever name comes into your mind, invite
that person." A few names came into my mind as if projected there
from outside. Percy Grant. At once I rejected that name, on Mamma's
account, as I have explained already. Mrs Krug. Oh no! Mamma wasn't
fond of Mrs Krug. Mrs Kaufman. No. Then I selected my personal
friends. Mrs Krug and Mrs Kaufman both were extremely hurt because
I didn't invite them and what harmony there was between us was
broken for the time being. As for Percy Grant ... !)

16 July 1912

Tuesday, 16 July, the day proposed for the yacht trip up the
Hudson, was a day of crushing disappointment. In the morning I
awoke thinking: Today great things may happen for Percy; miracles
may happen! Still, an instinct made me uneasy.

As soon as I reached the Master's house I asked if Dr Grant had
been heard from. No word had come, Dr Farid told me, and really the
Master ought to know in order to arrange His day's appointments.
"You had better telephone, Juliet."

I went to the corner drugstore and called the Rectory,

only to learn that Percy was still in Greenwich. I called him in
Greenwich.

"Oh, Juliet." He sounded bored. "I have been meaning to telephone
you all morning, but one thing after another has prevented. No, I
am sorry, tell 'Abdu'l-Baha how very sorry I am, but I cannot
arrange the trip for today. Mrs Flagler was in town yesterday and
it didn't agree with her and she isn't well enough to go today."

"I am very sorry," I murmured, so shocked I could scarcely speak.

"When does the Master leave New York?"

"On the twenty-second."

"On the twenty-second? I hope it can be arranged before them."

"I hope so."

"How did the supper go off the other night?"

"What supper?"

"The supper you had for the Master?"

"There was no supper."

"Why, I heard you talking about 'provisions' over the telephone
with Mrs Morten."

"That was only fruit and a cool drink. The Master just paid us a
visit. I asked you to come in."

"Well, I didn't feel that I could. I thought you were going to sit
around a table and that all those Persians you had asked would fill
it up, and that woman you invited at the Master's house. It makes
me shudder, Juliet, to think of all the money you spent that day."

"That was nothing."

"Oh, money is nothing, I suppose!"

"Certainly nothing compared with a visit from the Master." And I
said goodbye.

I went back to the house so ashamed I could hardly

hold up my head: miserably ashamed of Percy Grant, burning up with
indignation at his deliberate insult to the Master, to Him Whose
"dress was the same as the dress of Jesus", an insult levelled at
the Master, the real intention of which was to hurt me. Just a
petty revenge on me.

I gave Percy's wretched message to Dr Farid without any comment;
then stole off alone and wept.

Soon my Lord sent for me. I longed to unburden my heart to Him, but
Grace Krug and Louise were with Him and Grace was telling her own
troubles, speaking of some unhappiness of the day before, so of
course I could say nothing. I sat forcing back my tears, feeling
that at any moment I might burst out crying and that I mustn't do
that in His Presence for any other reason than love.

"And now," said the Master, still talking with Grace, "the sun is
out again! The sun is shining. I am glad of that. I do not like
clouds!"

Oh, what if I cry now, I thought.

"Winds from all directions: from the north, south, east, and
west--great hurricanes--have beaten against My Ark, yet My Ark
still floats." Smiling, He made an adorable gesture with His hands,
swinging them like a rocking boat. "One single wave has submerged
many a great ship, yet My Ark still floats!"

"Juliet," He said, turning suddenly to me, "is there anything you
want to ask Me privately? Biya! (Come)."

He led me by the hand into the back room.

"Now speak. Your eyes are all speech!"

"I only want to say that I am deeply ashamed for Dr Grant. Deeply
sorry. The friend to whose husband the yacht belongs is sick and
he could not get it for today."

"It is better so," said the Master. "I was wondering

how I could do it, for I am not very well today and must be in
Brooklyn this evening at eight o'clock. But I would have done it
for his sake. It is better; better," He ended, with a strange sweet
intonation, as He returned to the other room.

18 July 1912

Each day I drink deeper of the cup of Love. Yesterday the draught
I took was pure ecstasy. I saw Him for three brief moments only,
but those three moments were charged.

First, I saw Him with a few others--Mrs Helen Goodall, Miss Wise,
Ella Goodall Cooper--and He spoke to us of the kindness of God,
holding in His hand my rosary, which He has carried for several
days (the one Khanum gave me in Haifa). When we meet kindness in
a human being He said, how happy it makes us. How much happier we
will be when we realize the kindness of God.

Later He called to Him alone. I met Him as He came downstairs from
His room to the library. He was all in white.

"Ah-h, Juliet," He said. He began to walk up and down the library.
"Your mother sent me these things," (referring to some flowers and
another little present). "These things came from your mother? I
became very happy from them, but she should not have taken the
trouble."

"It made her so happy to send that little offering."

"But she should not have taken the trouble." He continued to walk
up and down. In a moment He said: "I am very much please with your
truthfulness, Juliet.

That matter between us, your truthfulness on that occasion makes
Me happy whenever I think of it."

"Everything in my heart is for You to see, my Lord. I only hope the
day may come when You will see nothing in it except the Love of
God."

He came very close and looked deep into my eyes with His brilliant
eyes.

"I see your heart," He said. "I look into your face and your heart
is perfectly clear to Me."

Again He paced up and down and it was then I knelt.

"Tell the Master," I said to Valiyu'llah Khan, "I pray that my
heart may become entirely detached from this world."

"Your heart," said the Master, pausing before me and gazing at me
with a face of glistening light, "will become entirely detached.
You are now in the condition I desired for you." He walked to the
window and stood, looking out. "I wish you to teach constantly.
Therein lies your happiness, and My happiness."

He came back to me. I had risen.

"I wish you to be detached from the entire world of existence; to
turn to the Kingdom of Abha with a pure heart; with a pure breath
to teach the people. I desire for you," He continued, resuming His
walk, "that which I desire for My own daughters, Tuba and Ruha."

With this He dismissed me.

__________

In the evening I returned to a wedding, Grace Robarts' and Harlan
Ober's, where the Master, for me, as well as for the bride and
bridegroom, turned the water of life into wine.

Grace and Harlan stood together, transfigured; they

seemed to be bathed in white light. Mr Ives, standing opposite,
married them. Back in the shadow sat the Master. There were times
when I, sitting at a little distance from Him, felt His lightning
glance on me. At the end of the service He blessed the marriage.
After this He went upstairs, to the front room on the third floor.

I soon followed him there, taking with me our coloured maid, Mamie,
and her little adopted son, George, a child six years old. Mamie
wanted to have the Master bless him.

On the way up in the bus I had (idiotically) asked: "Do you know
who the Master is, George?"

"No, ma'am," very positively.

"Well, you will know some day, for by the time you grow up the
whole world will know Who the Master is and then you will be so
proud and happy to remember that He blessed you."

The blessing the Master gave George was not an obvious one, there
was nothing ceremonial about it. He just took the child on His knee
and talked playfully with him and caressed him. But how it
impressed that little boy!

While we were going downtown in the bus, he rolled his big eyes up
at me and out of a dead silence said: "I know now, ma'am."

And when Mamie's husband, Cornelius, opened the door for us, George
rushed to him, crying out: "The Master blessed me, dearie, and I
will show you just how."

Then he clattered down the basement stairs and I was spared the
scene! I never did know how George demonstrated it--he couldn't
have taken Cornelius on

his knee!--but the next day Mamie told me of something else.

"Dearie," George had asked, "is the Master that blessed me this
evening the same Master that holds the moon in His hand and makes
the sun shine?"

"Go to bed, child," said Cornelius.

"But," repeated George, "is the Master that same Lord that makes
the sun shine and the rain come down?"

"The Lord that makes the sun shine," said Mamie, "is in the Master
that blessed you this evening, George. It was the Holy Spirit that
blessed you."

__________

(Footnote. 1947. Thirteen years later a handsome young man came to
my door. At first I thought he was Syrian. "Do you remember
George?" he asked. Almost at once he spoke of the Master. "I have
had a rough life among my own people," he said, "but the blessing
He gave me has lived like a fountain in my heart. It has protected
me through all my sufferings. It has inspired me with the resolve
to work for better conditions among my people. And," he went on,
"that other time when He spoke at a big meeting on the first floor
and you brought me up from the basement and stood me on a chair so
that I could see Him plainly, I thought He was God then and was
frightened." Then he described the Master to the minutest detail:
the colour of His eyes, His skin, His hair, even the two tones of
white in the turban He wore.

A few years ago, during the Second World War, I heard of George
again from his real mother. He was in England, practising medicine
and working with the wounded in the hospitals.)

19 July 1912

This morning I went as usual to the Master's house but was stopped
at the door by Alice Beede.

"Fly," she said, "after Mrs Goodall and Ella. They have your
rosary. The Master just gave it to them."

My precious, precious coral rosary--given to me by the Greatest
Holy Leaf! Given on a wonderful occasion, when a young carpenter
living on Mount Carmel had been healed of typhoid fever. Ruha and
I had climbed the mountain to see him and we were trying to help
his mother when Khanum and the Holy Mother arrived with a doctor.
The doctor went into the hut and the rest of us stayed outside,
Khanum sitting on the ground under a tree, praying on this same
rosary. It was dark by then, and very dark in that little garden.
Khanum was all in shadowy white, from her veil to her feet. When
she had finished praying, she glided like a spirit toward me and
threw the coral chain over my head. A few days ago I took this
great treasure to the Master. "This is the dearest thing I
possess," I said, "except Your tablets and the ring You gave me.
If You will use it, my Lord, it will be infinitely dearer."

I ran up the street after Mrs Goodall and Ella Cooper and when I
overtook them said breathlessly: "Alice Beede has just told me that
the Master gave you my rosary."

"Oh! Take it back," said Mrs Goodall.

But I had come to my senses.

"No, no," I answered. "If the Master gave it to you it is yours."

In the afternoon I went again to my Lord. He was sitting in the
English basement, in His lap a tangled pile of rosaries. I sat
between Ahmad and Edward Getsinger. The Master held up a rosary.

"To whom do I return this?" He inquired of Ahmad.

Edward leaned over to me and whispered: "That is the way your
rosary went."

"Oh no, it isn't," I whispered back.

"What did Juliet say?" asked the Master.

"It was nothing, my Lord, nothing," I said.

He smiled and the subject was dropped.[125]

25 July 1912

She Master is gone. Gone to Dublin, New Hampshire.

I shall never forget the day He left, day before yesterday. I went
up early to His house--but oh, too late! On the street I met Mrs
Hutchinson.

"The Master has gone!" she said, her eyes full of tears, her lips
quivering.

"When?"

"Twenty minutes ago."

"I will go to the station."

I jumped on a subway train and reached the station in a few
minutes. But nowhere did I see the Master and the Persians. I
stopped a porter.

"Did a party of foreigners pass through here just now?"

"Egyptians?"

[Photograph of 'Abdu'l-Baha in Dublin, New Hampshire]

"Yes!" There wasn't a minute to explain.

"Yes. Go to track 19."

But track 19 was deserted except for the gateman.

"Has a party of foreigners passed this way?" I asked him.

"Turks?"

"Yes."

"They are on the train."

"I supposed I couldn't go through?"

"Yes, go through, but come right back."

Smiling my thanks, I dashed down the platform. At one of the
windows in the train I saw a white turban.

"Could I get on the car?" I asked the conductor.

"Yes, get on. It's all right."

__________

"Ah-h, Juliet!"

"Goodbye, my Lord."

"Goodbye." He drew me down beside Him. "You should not have
troubled to come here," He said.

"My heart wouldn't let me do otherwise."

"I will see you in a month.[126] Give My greetings to your mother,
to all the friends; to Mrs Krug, Miss Boylan."

Closely, closely He pressed my hand, pouring the attar of rose of
His Love upon me. Then once more He said goodbye and I left.

It had been too bold, yet even against the rules every door had
opened to me.

__________

The last time I talked with the Master was the day before He left.
Sure that He was to leave that morning,

the twenty-second, I went very early to His house, with eight
palm-leaf fans in my hands. Mamma had sent them for the Master and
the Persians to use on the hot journey.

The master was sitting in the English basement at the window. He
called me to a chair opposite Him. "What are all those for?" He
asked, laughing, waving His hand toward the fans.

I laughed too, for they did look funny. I explained their purpose
and that they were from Mamma.

For a while I sat in silence before Him. Then suddenly I realized
that He was about to leave us, that in just a few minutes He would
be gone. I began to cry quietly.

"Tell Juliet," laughed the Master, "that I am not going today."

At this the sun came out! But soon by tears were flowing again,
this time because His love was melting me.

"Why are you crying, Juliet? I am not going today!"

__________

In the afternoon He called me to Him and I had twenty minutes alone
with Him and Valiyu'llah Khan. I sat with over-brimming eyes,
drinking in the Glory of His Presence.

"Oh Valiyu'llah Khan," I said, "say to the Master for me that I
know He is the Sun and I pray He will always encircle me with His
rays."

"You are very near Me," He answered, "and while you speak the truth
you will always be with Me. I pray that you may become the candle
of New York, spreading the Light of Love all around you."

After this we sat silent in His Presence, silent for a long time.

Once again He saw me when Marjorie came. He told

her she was my child, my "little chicken" and said we must comfort
each other after He has gone. Green Acre, Maine, 1947

If only I had written of Green Acre day by day while we were there
with Him! There are unforgettable things, but so many details,
precious details, have slipped away.

Mamma and I were in Bass Rocks when the Master's invitation reached
us. Bass Rocks, on a cliff above the ocean, was Mamma's paradise
and we could never afford more than two weeks of it. So, when
Ahmad's postcard came, with word from the Master that He wished us
to spend three days with Him in Green Acre, all she could think of
at first was that three days would be lost from her paradise!

"I won't go," she said.

"Oh, Mamma, an invitation from a king is a command, and this is
from the King of kings."

"Well, I'll go for just one night and no more. And I won't take a
suitcase. Just a little Irish bundle, so that we can't stay more
than one night."

So she packed our little Irish bundle: two night-gowns, two
toothbrushes, our combs and brushes and a change of underwear.

When we arrived at the Green Acre Inn the Master met us at the door
with His loving Marhaba; then He drew me into the dining room.

"She does not want?" He asked in English.

I couldn't tell the truth then, but of course He knew.

__________

Pictures come back to me. Mamma and I following Him down a path to
the Eirenion, where He was to speak

to the believers. He was all in white in the dark. Mamma whispering
to me: "It is like following a Spirit."

A tussle day after day to keep Mamma in Green Acre, in which dear
Carrie Kinney helped me.

A night when a horrifying young man came to a meeting at the
Kinneys' house. From head to foot he was covered with soot. His
blue eyes stared out from a dark grey face. This was Fred
Mortenson. He had spent half his boyhood and young manhood in a
prison in Minneapolis. Our beloved Albert Hall, who was interested
in prison work, had found him and taken him out on parole and given
him the Baha'i Message. But Albert Hall was dead when the Master
came to America.

Fred Mortenson, hearing that 'Abdu'l-Baha was in Green Acre, and
having no money to make the trip, had ridden the bumpers [on
freight trains] to His Presence.

He came into the meeting and sat down and was very unhappy when the
Master, pacing back and forth as He talked, took no notice of him.
"It must be that He knows I stole a ride," thought Fred (who told
me all about it afterward). But no sooner was the meeting over and
the Master upstairs in His room than He sent for Fred.

Fred had said nothing to anyone about his trip on the bumpers, but
the minute he entered that upstairs room the Master asked smiling
and with twinkling eyes: "How did you enjoy your ride?" then He
took from Fred's hand his soot-covered cap and kissed it.

Years later, during the First World War, when the American
believers sent ten thousand dollars for the relief of the starving
Arabs, the messenger they chose to carry the money through the
warring countries was: Fred Mortenson. The Master declined the ten
thousand

dollars, relieving the Arabs Himself by His own hard labour. He
went to His estate near Tiberius and Himself ploughed the fields
there; then stored all the grain in the Shrine of the Bab.

For this He was knighted by Great Britain when British rule
replaced Turkish in Palestine. It was meant as an honour, but to
me it was like an insult. It nearly killed me after that to direct
my supplications to Sir 'Abdu'l-Baha 'Abbas.

__________

But to return to Green Acre.

One day the Master, speaking from the porch of somebody's cottage,
while the believers sat on the grass below, made this fascinating
statement: "We are in affinity now because in pre-existence we were
in affinity."

"Let's ask Him what He means by that," whispered Carrie to me.

So, in the evening, while the Master was in our room--Mamma's and
mine--and Carrie sitting there with us, I put the question to Him.

"I will answer you later," He said.

But He never did, outwardly.

In a minute or so Mamma, with that funny boldness of hers which
would sometimes burst through her timidity, said: "Master, I would
like to see You without Your turban."

He smiled. "It is not our custom, Mrs Thompson, to take off our
turbans before ladies, but for your sake I will do it."

And oh, the beauty we saw then! There was something in the silver
hair flowing back from His high forehead, something in the shape
of the head, which, in spite of His age, made me think of Christ.

There was another night, when Carrie, Mamma, and I and a few other
believers were sitting in the second-floor hall. Suddenly, on the
white wall of the floor above, at the head of the staircase, the
Master's great shadow loomed. Mamma slipped over to the foot of the
stairs and looking up with adoring eyes, called: "Master!"

And still another night. This was our third in Green Acre. Again
we were sitting in the second-floor hall, but now the Master was
in our midst.

"We must say goodbye tomorrow," Mamma said to Him.

"Oh no, Mrs Thompson," He laughed. "You are not going tomorrow. One
more day." and He laughed again. "You see, I am leaving for Boston
day after tomorrow and you are of My own family. Therefore you must
travel with Me."

And Mamma submitted now with a satisfaction wonderful to see. She
was proud as a peacock. "He said I was of His own family," she kept
repeating to me.

Once He called Mamma and me into His room and among other things
He said was this: "There are correspondences, Mrs Thompson, between
heaven and earth and Juliet's correspondence in heaven is Mary of
Magdala."

__________

(This diary, owing to the fact that it was written under
difficulties, has large areas left out of it. I find that I have
not spoken of what seemed then such a crucial thing--Lua's
departure for California. But since she was not at our house when
the Master visited us on 12 July, and my last account of being with
her is dated the morning of 11 July, I'm sure she must have left
the night of the eleventh.

I have just one story to tell of Lua, with the Master, in
California. I want to tell it for two reasons. First: because of
its value and also its humour; then because another version of it
is still being told by the believers, less direct and much less
like the Master. This is how I had it from Lua herself.

She and Georgie Ralston (who had gone with Lua to California) were
driving one day with the Master, when He closed His eyes and
apparently feel asleep. Lua and Georgie talked on, I imagine about
their own concerns, for suddenly His eyes sprang open and He
laughed.

"I, me, my, mine: words of the Devil!" He said.) New York

November 1912

The Master is here again!

I met Him at the boat last Monday, 11 November. I met Him alone.
And this is how that happened. At noon on 11 November, Mirza
'Ali-Akbar arrived from Washington to find living quarters for the
Masters and the Persians. I had had a wire from him earlier, asking
me to meet him at the station and to house-hunt with him, which I
did. The Master was to come at ten that night and we thought we had
plenty of time to notify the friends so that they could meet His
ferryboat, but later another wire came to our house, relayed to me
through Mamma and Mr Mills at Mrs Champney's (and luckily catching
me there), saying that the Master would arrive at eight. Through
a series of accidents, Mr Mills' chauffeur landed us first
somewhere in New Jersey and then at the Liberty Street station, and
there was no time to telephone anybody.

"This will be very bad," said Mirza 'Ali-Akbar, but we couldn't
help it.

We had accomplished everything else, had rented again the dear
house on Seventy-Eighth Street (Mrs Champney's) and found extra
rooms for some of the Persians.

Now, Mirza 'Ali-Akbar insisted on my taking Mr Mills' car and going
at breakneck speed to the Twenty-Third Street station to try to
meet the Master there, if He should come that way, while he himself
waited at Liberty Street.

I reached Twenty-Third Street just in time. The ferryboat was
approaching and very close to the dock. Standing at the end of the
pier, I saw it with its chain of lights. I saw Dr Farid. Then the
Master rose from a seat on the deck and entered the brightly lit
cabin.

Soon He came toward me down the gangplank.

"Ah, Juliet," He said, taking my hand in His and drawing me along
with Him, so that I walked beside Him. But He didn't invite me to
drive to His house with Him. Instead, He sent me back after Mirza
'Ali-Akbar--Dr Baghdadi and Mirza Mahmud going with me. We returned
all together to Seventy-Eighth Street.

Oh, to see Him in that house again, sitting in His old corner in
the English basement, the corner in the bay window!

__________

I had been very naughty with Mamma that day and had grieved her.
My precious mother was brought up in luxury, lived in luxury until
Papa died. She cannot get over her sensitiveness about our
too-apparent poverty and she simply won't have people to meals. I
had begged her to make an exception of Mirza 'Ali-Akbar, who was
arriving at such an awkward hour, and to let me bring him back for
lunch. But she wouldn't hear of it.

Whereupon I flew into a temper, told her what I thought of her
"false pride", and stamped out of the house.

Now, entering the Master's house with the three Persians, instead
of a welcome, I received a blow. The Master didn't even look at me.

"How is your mother?" were His first words. "Is she happy?"

Then He told me to go straight back to her but to return the next
day. I went back and comforted her with His rebuke to me.

__________

Early as I could on 12 November, I sought His Beloved Presence.
Ruth and Lawrence White (who have lately been married) were with
Him and Rhoda and Marjorie. It seems impossible sometimes for the
physical ear, or the human mind, to retain His Divine Words. They
moved me to tears.

"Don't cry! Don't cry!" said the Master, with His infinite
tenderness.

The twelfth of November, the Birthday of Baha'u'llah, was the day
of Mrs Krug's meeting and never, never shall I forget it.

There, at Mrs Krug's, the Master invoked Baha'u'llah. And as His
cry, "Ya Baha'u'llah!" rang out, I hid my eyes, for it was as
though He were calling Someone the same plane with Him, Someone
Whom He saw, and Who would certainly come.

He came--the Blessed Beauty, the Lord of Hosts. A Power flashed
into our midst, a great Sacred Power ... I can find no words.
Burning tears poured down my cheeks. My heart shook.

After the meeting, the Master, Who was resting in another room,
sent for me. I had supplicated through

Valiyu'llah Khan that He would come to the meeting at our house
Friday.

"Tomorrow, Juliet," He said, "I will tell you about your meeting.
Now go back to the house and wait till I come."

I did so and He soon came--came and sat in the corner of the window
in the English basement just as He used to last summer. Carrie
Kinney was there and Mr Hoar.

He had spoken so often in public and in private of an inevitable
world war, warning America not to enter it, that I felt moved to
mention it now.

"Will the present war in the Balkans," I asked, "terminate in the
world war?"

"No, but within two years a spark will rise from the Balkans and
set the whole world on fire."

Soon He rose and calling, "Come, Juliet," and beckoning to
Valiyu'llah Khan, took us out to walk in "His garden", that narrow
strip of park above the river. As we followed Him, Valiyu'llah Khan
said: "How blessed to be walking in His footsteps!"

He led us to a bench and sat down between us, clasping my hand
tightly. And then He began to ask me questions: question after
question about the believers in New York, as to a certain condition
among them, a lack of firmness in the Covenant, which I had never
suspected--of which I was really ignorant. Of course, I did know
that earlier there had been awful confusion--some teaching that
'Abdu'l-Baha was like Peter, others that He was Jesus Himself--but
I thought that time was past.

"But I don't know, my Lord!" I said. "If I knew, I would tell you."

"I know you don't know," He laughed, "and I do

know. There are many things I know that you do not know. I was only
testing you. I have loved you for your truthfulness, for the truth
you spoke in a matter you remember. I wanted to see if your heart
were in the same state of truthfulness." Then He said: "With those
who are against the Centre of the Covenant you must not associate
at all. When you find that a soul has turned away from the Covenant
you must cut yourself off completely from him. You will know these
people. You will see it in their faces." (How on earth, I thought,
could I trust my judgement of the faces? He answered my unspoken
thought at once.) "You will see a dimness on the faces, like the
letting down of a veil."

"My Lord," I said, "I feel that I have failed in everything. I have
failed You in all my pitiful efforts to bring about unity. And I
know my failure has been due to lack of strict obedience."

"Obedience," said the Master, "is firmness in the Covenant. You
must associate with the steadfast ones." He mentioned three people
who, since His return--since I met His ferryboat alone--have
wreaked their displeasure on me, one of whom had even "scandalized
my name" (!) for several years; then added to the list--Mason
Remey. This was bitter! "You must be a rock, as they are rocks."

"My Lord," I asked, with a sinking heart, "am I not firm in the
Covenant?"

"You could be more firm," He laughed.

"Oh, my Lord!"

He rose and we began to walk.

"I had hoped," I said miserably, "that nobody loved You better than
I."

"I know you love Me, Juliet," He answered, "but

there are degrees of love." Then He told me He carried a
measuring-rod in His hand by which He measured the love of the
people and that rod was obedience.

At the corner, at the entrance to the park, He paused. "You must
love Me," He said, "for the sake of God."

"You are all I shall ever know of God!"

"I am the Servant of God. You must love Me for His sake and for the
sake of Baha'u'llah. I am very kind to you Juliet," He added.

"I know, my Lord."

"Now go back to your mother, so that she may be pleased with you!"
He laughed, and left me to wait for the bus.

But when He had crossed the street, when I saw Him stop for a
moment to speak to Valiyu'llah Khan, I sank on the chain of the
fence utterly broken-hearted.

Oh I am nothing, nothing, I thought. I have done nothing but fail
Him. Which was just what He wanted me to see, I suppose.

But, could it be that I was not firm? I examined my character: Yes,
it was unstable.

__________

On Wednesday, 14 November, I went very early to my Lord's house.
He was on the point of going out, but He called me to Him.

"My Lord," I said, as He paced up and down His room, "I want to
thank You for Your great mercy last night. I was asleep and You
woke me."

"I pray you may ever be awake. There are a few souls in America,"
He continued, "whom I have chosen to be teachers in this Cause. You
are of those, Juliet. I wish you to have all the qualities of a
teacher. That is all."

Then He asked me to wait till His return. I waited all

day. At five o'clock He came and called me to His room on the upper
floor. With that exquisite courtesy of His, the sweetness of which
almost breaks the heart, He--I can hardly write it--asked me to
excuse Him for keeping me waiting.

"To wait for You, my Lord, is joy. Oh these blessed days when we
can wait for You!"

He went on to tell me why He had been detained ...

__________

(The record of this last month must be sketchy. I cannot copy it
all, as it concerns other people, and conditions that are past and
best forgotten.

28 November 1912

It is Thanksgiving Day, and I am thankful--thankful and happy.
Everything that means my personal happiness, even every hope is
lost. My Lord has entirely stripped my life. But I pray that He has
freed my spirit.

On 15 November, the Master came to our house (48 West Tenth Street)
and gave a most wonderful talk in the front room on the first floor
to a great crowd of people who filled both the front and back rooms
and the hall.[127] I brought George up from the basement and stood
him on a chair, so that he could see the Master. He thought the
Master was God and was frightened.

Driving down to us with Mrs Champney, our Lord had said: "The time
has come for Me to throw bombs!" And He threw them in His talk that
night.

"I have spoken," He said, "in the various Christian churches and
in the synagogues, and in no assembly has

there been a dissenting voice. All have listened and all have
conceded that the Teachings of Baha'u'llah are superlative in
character, acknowledging that they constitute the very essence or
spirit of this age and that there is no better pathway to the
attainment of its ideals. Not a single voice has been raised in
objection. At most there have been some who have refused to
acknowledge the Mission of Baha'u'llah, although even these have
admitted that He was a great teacher, a most powerful soul, a very
great man. Some who could find no other pretext have said: 'These
Teachings are not new; they are old and familiar; we have heard
them before.' Therefore, I will speak to you upon the distinctive
characteristics of the Manifestation of Baha'u'llah and prove that
from every standpoint His Cause is distinguished from all others."

And in this address, which was one of His most powerful, the Master
certainly proved it. The address was taken down and will be
printed.

__________

On 18 November, at the Kinneys' house, the Master put Howard
MacNutt through a severe ordeal, an inevitable ordeal.

Mr MacNutt had been one of the few who, when I first came to New
York, had taught that the Master was "like Peter"--just a glorified
disciple. But for years he had never mentioned this point of view,
and I thought he had gotten over it.

In Chicago there are some so-called Baha'is who are still connected
with Khayru'llah, the great Covenant-breaker, and last week the
Master sent Mr MacNutt to Chicago to see them and try to persuade
them to give up Khayru'llah; otherwise he was to cut them off from
the

[Photograph: 'Abdu'l-Baha with His Persian entourage in the garden
of Howard MacNutt, New York, 1912.]

faithful believers. He--Mr MacNutt--wrote Diya Baghdadi that he had
found these people "angels", and did nothing about the situation.

He had just returned to New York and was to meet the Master at the
Kinneys' house that evening, 18 November, for the first time since
his unfruitful trip. I was in the second-floor hall with the Master
and Carrie Kinney when he arrived. The Master took him to His own
room. After some time they came out together into the hall.

An immense crowd had gathered by then on the first floor, which is
open the whole length of the house.

I heard the Master say to Mr MacNutt: "Go down and tell the people:
'I was like Saul. Now I am Paul, for I see."

"But I don't see," said poor Howard.

"Go down and say: 'I was like Saul.'"

I pulled his coattail. "For God's sake," I said, "go down."

"Let me alone," he replied in his misery.

"GO DOWN," commanded the Master.

Mr MacNutt turned and went down, and his back looked shrunken. The
Master leaned over the stair rail, His head thrown far back, His
eyes closed, in anguished prayer. I sat with Carrie on the top
step, watching Him. This is like Christ in Gethsemane, I thought.

We could hear the voice of Howard MacNutt stumbling through his
confession: "I was like Saul." But he seemed to be saying it by
rote, dragging through it still unconvinced. Nevertheless when he
came upstairs again, the Master deluged him with love.

By that time the Master was back in His room and as Mr MacNutt
appeared at the door, He ran forward to meet him. Our Lord was all
in white that night and as

He ran with His arms wide open He looked like a great flying bird.
He enfolded Howard in a close embrace, kissed his face and neck,
welcomed with ecstasy this broken man who, even though bewildered,
had obeyed Him.

The next night while Mamma, Miss Annie Boylan[128] and I were
together in the Master's Presence, Miss Annie Boylan brought up Mr
MacNutt's name and spoke gloatingly of his chastisement.

The Master sighed. "I immersed Mr MacNutt in the fountain of Job
last night," He said.

__________

The next morning, Sunday, 24 November, I hastened to the Master's
house. I knew it would be full of people, friends from other towns
who had come to attend the banquet and to be with the Master during
His last days here. I knew Mason Remey was in New York and that I
should have to meet him, perhaps this morning; and to face him
before the Master and all the believers would be misery. Our
engagement, in the eyes of the believers, had been the most ideal
romance:[129] I had seen many moved to tears by it, and when the
engagement was broken, every one of them had resented it, taking
up cudgels for Mason and putting the entire blame on me. As for
Mason, he had said: "I am an Indian. I never forgive."

For over a year Mason and I had avoided each other in perfectly
absurd ways. When I had to go down to Washington, I had written
him: "Please stay away from the meetings while I am there." (!)
Then one day, in Washington, when I boarded a moving, rocking
street

car, I fell backward on somebody's lap and turned to find myself
sitting on Mason's knees! I haven't seen him since and now, as I
approached the Master's house, knowing he would surely be
inside--if not at that moment, very soon--I wanted to turn and run.

Suddenly I saw that all this was nonsense and should be overcome
at once, before the Master's departure. An idea occurred to me. I
stood on the doorstep a minute or two bracing myself to carry it
out, to walk boldly up to Mason and say: "Let's go to the Master
now and tell Him we are friends again and want to work together in
the old way as a real brother and sister in the Cause." All at
once, though still a little shy, I felt eager to do this, to put
things right.

I opened the door, and there stood Marie Hopper, evidently waiting
to waylay me. She looked very mysterious, important and excited.
"Juliet," she said, "I must have a word with you. There is
something I have to do."

Then she exhorted me to marry Mason. She told me she knew the
Master wished it; she had "private information". The Master had
said I would "suffer" until I did marry him

"If I have to suffer," I said, "I prefer a respectable martyrdom!
I'd be nothing but a common prostitute if I married him. And I
can't believe, Marie, that the Master really said this."

May Maxwell came up at that moment, very earnest and starry-eyed,
to reinforce Marie.

"Very well," I said, "I will talk with the Master myself about it.
He is just upstairs, thank God, no further away than the top floor
of this house, and whatever He wants me to do, I will do."

I went up with Valiyu'llah Khan. But first I stopped on

the third floor and had a little private cry with Valiyu'llah.
Percy Grant was to come the next day to the Master--this would be
his last visit--and who could tell what would happen then; what
miracle might not happen; what change might not take place in him?
And now, Mason Remey looming up again!

We found the Master on the point of going out, standing in His
room, holding a big, white, folded umbrella. I knelt and He pressed
my head against His arm and took my hand in a tight clasp. "Speak,"
He said.

"Tell the Master, Valiyu'llah Khan, that I know He will laugh at
this, because I want to speak about marrying Mason. I have heard
from Marie Hopper that the Master wishes it. If He really does wish
it, I am ready."

"Na! Na!" (No! No!) said the Master. His eyes were twinkling and
the corners of His mouth quivering as though He were trying not to
smile. "It was this way," He said. "I never interfere. Mrs Hopper
came and told me that she wanted to unite you and Mr Remey. I said
'Very well, try.' But it is just as I wrote you long ago. Unless
there is perfect agreement--perfect harmony--love, these things are
not good."

I kissed His tender hand.

Needless to say, after this, I couldn't go near Mason Remey.

__________

On 20 November, the Master spent the morning in my little
room.[130] Once more His Glory shone in my room; His Life was
diffused in it. It is a sanctuary now to me, like a chapel in our
house.

He had brought Mrs Champney with Him and Mr MacNutt and, during the
morning, Mr MacNutt, who

was standing behind the Master very humbly, lifted the hem of His
'aba to his lips.

Mamma brought the Master some soup which she had prepared
especially for Him.

"I was just wishing for soup," He said sweetly. "You, Mrs Thompson,
have the reality of love."

Mamma then showed Him Papa's picture and He kissed it.

After a while He left us and was absent for some time. When He came
back He said: "I have been in every room in your house."

And when He bade us goodbye, as He swung down the stairs with His
powerful step, His voice rang out: "This house is blessed."

After He had gone I sat in the chair He had sat in and wrote an
appeal to Percy Grant: "I tried to reach you by phone this morning
to tell you the Master is soon returning to Haifa and that He
wishes to take His portrait with Him." (Percy had been exhibiting
it in the chapel of his Parish House.) "And to ask if some time
tomorrow I could come for it. I want to thank you too for your
hospitality to the Master's picture and for your beautiful
reference to it last Sunday, of which I have heard.

"You have given to many an opportunity to see at least a portrayal,
if a very weak one, of a dear face which I doubt if most of us will
see again. He is going back into dangerous conditions. Dear Percy,
will you let Him go without saying goodbye to Him? Only the other
day he was speaking of you."

To this I received a very stiff answer, merely asking the date of
the Master's sailing and His address.

__________

On Saturday, the twenty-third, the Master spent most of the day in
Montclair. When I went to His Seventy-

Eighth Street house in the late afternoon I was met with joyous
news. By staying over in Montclair He had missed reserving His
passage on the Mauretania and His sailing was now delayed! Also I
heard that Percy had telephoned and asked for permission to call
Monday.

That night the Master gave a banquet at the Great Northern Hotel.

May Maxwell, Marie Hopper, Marjorie, Rhoda, Mamma, and I sat at the
same table. Just before the food was served the Master rose from
his seat, a vial of attar of rose in His hand, and passed among all
the tables, anointing every one of His guests. As His wonderful
hand, dripping perfume, touched my forehead, as He scattered on my
hair the fragrant drops, my whole being seemed to wake and sparkle.

At the end of His talk[131] He said: "Such a banquet and such an
assemblage command the sincere devotion of all present and invite
the down-pouring of the blessings of God. Therefore be ye assured
and confident that the confirmations of God are descending upon
you, the assistance of God will be given unto you, the breaths of
the Holy Spirit will quicken you with a new life, the Sun of
Reality will shine gloriously upon you and the fragrant breeze of
the rose gardens of Divine Mercy will waft through the windows of
your souls. Be ye confident and steadfast ..."

__________

The following morning, 25 November, I spent with the Master. One
heavenly thing He said was this: "I have searched throughout the
length and breadth of this land for flames, I want the flames! The
solid ones are no good." Then He told me I was a flame. And He
spoke

[Photograph: 'Abdu'l-Baha in banquet at the Great Northern Hotel,
23 November 1912.]

beautifully of Mamma: "If I had a mother like yours, Juliet, I
would never deviate, even by a hair's breadth, from her wishes."

That night Mamma went to see Him with me. He was looking utterly
spent, but He insisted on keeping us--wouldn't let us go for at
least an hour.

In the meantime, at five o'clock, Percy Grant had come. The Master
was out but expected back any minute. He had had to address a
Women's Club early in the afternoon and from there was to go to Mrs
Cochran's. Through Valiyu'llah Khan, He had asked me to wait and
detain Percy. While I was waiting in the English basement, Carrie
and Mrs Champney with me, a taxicab stopped at the door; then in
came Dr Grant, very big and rigid, his black clerical broadcloth
and his white clerical collar firmly moulded around him.

Soon the Master returned. I can still see that Figure entering the
room like a mighty Eastern king, in His long green 'aba, edged with
white fur, His white turban; I can see His outstretched arms, His
divinely sweet smile; can hear the music of His voice: that long
"Oh-h! Oh-h!" of welcome. "Oh-h! Oh-h!, Dr Grant!" as though to
meet Dr Grant were the most delectable thing on earth.

Then He took Percy's hand and held it, never letting it go while
I saw them together, and began to talk smilingly to him.

"You must excuse me for keeping you waiting, Dr Grant. I am very,
very sorry to have kept you waiting, very sorry. But I was captured
by three hundred women this afternoon. Is it not a dreadful thing
to be captured by so many women? (At this I felt wickedly amused.)
"The women in America dominate the men," the Master continued.
"Come upstairs with Me." And still

holding Percy by the hand, with the lightness of a spirit He led
him up the first flight. I shall never cease to see those two
figures. The King of the East--and the West--in the garments of an
Eastern king, leading the way to an upper chamber; the resistant
clergyman, hardened into his clerical clothes, stiffly following,
pulled up the stairs by a too strong hand.

But when Percy came down, after a very long time, his whole face
was changed. His eyes were like burning stars, his mouth softened,
relaxed. He grasped my hand and pressed it. "May I take you home,
Juliet?"

"Thanks, Percy, I am staying here for a while."

Soon after he left, Dr Farid rushed down the stairs to me.

"There is hope--great hope," he said. "He was a changed man today.
Entirely different from last summer. He seemed deeply touched at
the thought of the Master returning into danger and asked if we
would cable him if any trouble should arise, so that he might do
whatever he could. He asked also if, from time to time, the Master
would send him news, 'through one of your humblest followers,' he
said.

"When he spoke of danger the Master replied that He had never
feared danger and told him the story of the Turkish Investigating
Committee sent to 'Akka by 'Abdu'l-Hamid. How the verdict of this
Committee was that He--'Abdu'l-Baha--must die; that He must either
be crucified at the gate of 'Akka or sent alone to the desert of
Fezan, where He would inevitably starve. How at that time the
Italian consul, a friend, had arranged for a ship to be sent to
Haifa, ostensibly with cargo, but really to help the Master escape.
And how the Master had said: 'My Father, Baha'u'llah, never
delivered Himself, though He had the opportunity. From this

Prison He spread His Teachings. I, therefore, will follow in His
footsteps. I will not deliver Myself.'

"Then," Dr Farid went on, "the Master told Dr, Grant of the
hastening of the Committee to Turkey to lay its verdict with all
possible speed before the Sultan, but before they landed on Turkish
soil, 'the cannon of God had boomed forth at the gates of the
Sultan's palace.' 'Abdu'l-Hamid was deposed by the rising of the
Young Turks and 'Abdu'l-Baha set free.

"'So,' ended the Master, 'God delivered Me.'"

The miracle had happened. Percy Grant was "a changed man!"

__________

Not long was I allowed to cherish my hope!

The next day, 26 November, while I was waiting in the Master's
house, He sent Dr Baghdadi to bring me to His room. May Maxwell was
with Him and Dr Baghdadi remained. I sat on the floor at my Lord's
feet.

Smiling down on me, He said: "Why does Mrs Maxwell love you so,
Juliet?"

"Because she is my spiritual mother."

"In Montreal, when I was staying with her, she was always
mentioning your name and Lua's. 'Juliet, Lua. Juliet, Lua. Juliet,
Lua,'" chanted the Master. "That was her song."

"May and Lua, May and Lua," I smiled, "are the two dearest names
to my heart."

"This is well," said the Master.

May turned to Dr Baghdadi. "Ask the Master," she said, "if I may
be allowed to speak of something to Him." And when she had received
permission: "My heart is tortured at the thought of all the
children who are starving for love in these days. So little is
understood

[Photograph of Juliet Thompson and may Maxwell]

of the privileges of motherhood. The children are left to nurses
and brought up in blighting environments. I want to ask His prayers
for the mothers of America. Juliet," she whispered to me, "join in
this supplication."

I put my best foot forward to support her: "I should like to join
in May's supplication that the women may soon realize that
motherhood is their first function." But, even as I spoke the words
I saw how funny they were, coming from me--and that I had spread
a snare for my own feet, which I suspect May wanted me to do!

The Master smiled broadly.

"What are you doing advocating this, Juliet? Where are your
children? Mrs Maxwell has a child, but where are yours? If you had
married, you too could have brought children to me, one to sit on
each knee! A sterile woman is like a fruitless tree. Of course,"
He added, smiling again and quoting my words of last summer, "of
course you will say: 'What can I do with my heart.'"

"No, I won't say that any more," I answered. "You can do something
with my heart if I cannot. You can make me a new heart. And now,
since the Master has spoken of this," I said to Dr Baghdadi, "there
is something I should like to ask Him. Last spring and summer He
was indefinite with me about ... Dr Grant; perhaps, as I have been
thinking lately, because I wasn't strong enough to bear the truth.
But I believe I am stronger now and ready, at a word from Him, to
renounce this hope. Is it not to be fulfilled?"

"No," said the Master. "Otherwise, I would have told you."

For a moment we sat in His Presence silent. In the fire of that
Presence, in that little moment, my hope of twelve years melted
away. As it vanished, a miracle happened. The Being sitting before
me, now writing on a bit

of parchment held in the palm of His hand, changed from a body to
a sun-like Spirit. I saw Him translucent, luminous, and depths of
iridescence opened behind Him.

"Oh," I cried, tears coursing down my cheeks, "since that phantom
of a hope went, I have entered the Presence of God."

The Master said nothing. He was still writing, writing
mysteriously.

"May," I whispered, "do you remember that prayer: 'As the Pen moves
over the pages of the Tablet by which the musk of significances in
the world of creation is exhaled?'"

After a while the Master looked up. "I wish you to marry, Juliet,"
He said. "I wish you to bring Me children to hold on My knees. God
will send someone to you who will be agreeable to you."

What did it matter?

"May I ask one thing, my Lord? May I supplicate for Percy's soul,
that in the end he will see the truth?"

"We must always pray for him," answered the Master.

Mrs Krug and Carrie came in then. I hated to cry before them, but
I couldn't stop.

"Don't cry, don't cry," said the Master, as only He can say it.

"Oh, that Voice!" whispered May.

"No, no. Don't cry." This from Grace Krug, with a very disapproving
look.

"I seem to be in flames, my Lord--the flames of Thy love, Thy
Presence--and to be melting."

But He saw deeper. "Khayr," (no) He said slowly.

"NO!" echoed Mrs Krug.

"You must be happy," the Master ended, "because of this thing I
have told you."

As I said, this happened in the afternoon of 26 November. The
morning had been a tremendous one.

Knowing that my Lord would be at the Kinneys', I went directly
there. On the way up in the bus a great wave of tears, like a tidal
wave, rose from my heart (I didn't know why) and threatened at any
moment to break over me.

I found the Master on the upper floor of the Kinneys' house with
the Persians, Carrie and Ned, Nellie Lloyd, and Mr Mills. The
Tablet of the Branch[132] was being translated under the
supervision of the Master. Dr Baghdadi and Dr Farid were working
on it, submitting it time after time to the Master before He was
satisfied with their rendering. I shall never forget His sternness,
His terrific majesty as He directed that translation.

The wave of tears did break as I listened and watched. I was shaken
beyond all control. Mirza Mahmud and Valiyu'llah Khan tenderly
tried to calm me.

7 December 1912

28 November, Thanksgiving Day, was to be a day of rest for our
Beloved Lord. It had been given out that no one would be received
at the house that day. So, when the telephone rang about noon and
Ahmad, at the other end, asked me to come immediately to the
Master, I felt so singled out and privileged! And to be alone with
Him and the Persians--that would be something important, something
wonderful.

But He met me with a grave, almost stern face. And

with a command which at once banished my complacent hope. Swiftly
crossing His room to the door where I stood, He said, without even
a greeting: "Mrs May Maxwell is sick. I want you to go with some
medicine to her and to spend the afternoon taking care of her." He
walked back to the window, beckoning me to follow Him. Then He
picked up a glass from His table and a bottle of rosewater. "Give
her this," He said. "Pour out so much," (He poured about an inch
into the glass) "and so much water. Put in some sugar, the sugar
of your love. Drink this yourself." He gave me the glass He had
been preparing, for my cure, and, looking pointedly at me, began
to pray.

"Ya Baha'u'l-Abha!"

Feeling strangely numb, I said, as I drank the rosewater: "Ya
Baha'u'l-Abha!"

He turned to the window and looked out.

"Ya Baha'u'l-Abha!"

"Ya Baha'u'l-Abha," I echoed.

Again and again He repeated the Greatest Name and I repeated it
after Him, praying with Him.

At last He said: "Now go to Mrs May Maxwell. Telephone your mother
that I have sent you to her as she is sick, to spend the afternoon
with her."

Then He bowed, still grave, and I left Him, the bottle of rosewater
in my hand.

__________

(Footnote. 1947. Years later I was to see the meaning of this and
that I had utterly failed in administering the "medicine". Mrs May
Maxwell wouldn't drink it; she said I had put too much sugar in it.
I loved her with a personal love. It never rose to the heights of
an all-forgiving love, and so I

couldn't overcome that strange vein of cruelty in the love I think
she felt for me. We were still divided when she died. This was one
of my great failures.

Another significant thing: Nine years after that date, on 28
November 1921, our Beloved Lord ascended. Could this have been the
reason, with His pre-vision, that He spent that day in 1912 in
solitude?)

__________

Within the next day or two, Mrs May Maxwell and I were together in
His Presence. "Am I spiritually sick, my Lord?" she asked. "For I
was not physically sick the day you sent me the rosewater."

"Yes," He answered gently, "you are spiritually sick. Had you been
physically sick I would have sent you a doctor instead of Juliet."

__________

On 29 November, May Maxwell, Dorothea Spinney, and I were with the
Master when Esther Foster came in. May, Miss Spinney, and I rose.

"All of you may stay," said the Master, "on the condition that
Juliet doesn't cry."

I tried so hard after that to squeeze back the tears, but I
couldn't. I wiped them away furtively as they trickled down one by
one.

He kept us with Him an hour. Dorothea Spinney--an Englishwoman and
a Theosophist--spoke of a vision she had had while meditating. She
has seen a great globe of fire which she seemed to know was "the
Centre of Peace".

"I should like to understand this," she said. "What, or Who is the
Centre of Peace?"

The Master had been writing on a piece of parchment held in the
palm of His hand. He continued to write, not looking up, leaving
Miss Spinney's question in the air.

And all the time He glowed more and more, like the sun dispersing
clouds, pulsing out with every breath intenser light.

"Look at His Face," I whispered to Miss Spinney, "and see the
Centre of Peace."

By and by He spoke: "Excuse me for writing," He said, "it was very
important. You asked me concerning visions. Sometimes the thought
becomes abstracted, enters the World of Reality, and there makes
discoveries."

Then He rose and began to pace up and down and discovered that I
was crying.

"Oh my Lord," I cried, in a panic, "what are You going to do with
me?"

"I am going to find a Mister for you," He laughed.

__________

Those last meetings in the Kinneys' house. Those divine talks of
the Good Shepherd leaving His flock for a while: too tender, too
sad for the heart to bear.[133]

One day, however, He was very stern. Holding the book of the Hidden
Words in His hand, walking back and forth with that step which
always makes me think of the prophecy, "Who is this that cometh
from Bozrah, Who treadeth the wine-press in His fury?" lifting the
Hidden Words high, He said: "Whosoever does not live up to these
Words is not of Me."

__________

Mr Howard Colby Ives accepted the Cause in those days. Mrs Moore
accepted. Touched to the core of their beings they would sit with
streaming eyes in the meetings.

[Photograph: 'Abdu'l-Baha with the Kinney family in their home in
New York.]

At last came the day before He sailed.

"May I stay in some corner of this house all day," I asked, "that
I may breathe the same air with You this last day?"

"What does your mother say about it?"--laughing.

"She said I might."

"Very well."

In the afternoon He called me. He kept me in the room a long, long
time, seeing many others while I sat there. When He had dismissed
them all, He came close to me and took my hand.

"There is a matter," He said, "about which I want to speak to you.
The photographs of the portrait you painted of Me, you have offered
them for the Mashriqu'l-Adhkar. I know your circumstances, Juliet.
You have not complained to Me, you have said nothing, but I know
them. I know your affairs are in confusion, that you have debts,
that you have that house, that you have to take care of your
mother. Now I want you to keep the money" (for the photographs)
"for yourself. No, no; do not feel unhappy," (as I began to cry)
"this is best. You must do exactly as I say. I will speak about
this Myself to the believers. I will tell them," He laughed, "that
is it My command."

I thanked Him brokenly.

I can see Him now, pacing up and down the room in front of the line
of Persians, who stood with bowed heads and folded arms in the
Glory of His Presence, deeply aware of its Divineness.

Then Valiyu'llah spoke: "Juliet wants to know if You are pleased
with her, or not?"

(I had spoken out my troubled heart to dear Valiyu'llah.)

"I am very much pleased with the love of Juliet," answered the
Master.

My Lord, I pray that my life may please You."

"Insha'llah." And that was all!

"And that my services may become acceptable to You. I know I have
not begun to serve You yet."

The Master said nothing.

But that night He healed my broken heart, healed it by a tone in
His voice as He spoke to my mother, which was the essence of God's
tenderness, a tone unimaginable to those who have only heard the
human voice.

As Mamma approached Him to bid Him goodbye, He said: "Ah, the
mother of Juliet; the mother of Julie!" (Mamma's pet name for me.)

"I can't bear to say goodbye," said Mamma.

"Insha'llah, I shall meet you in 'Akka, Mrs Thompson, and there I
shall greet you with 'Welcome! Welcome!'"

This was on the night of 4 December.

He asked me to come to the Emerys' (where He had been staying for
a few days) the morning of 5 December, the day of His sailing; and
I was there at eight o'clock. That last morning. I stood at the
door of His room, gazing in, my eyes drinking their fill, if they
ever could drink their fill, of the Divine Figure as He sat, or
stood, or moved about the room.

He called me in twice. The second time He took my hand. "Remember,"
He said, "I am with you always. Baha'u'llah will be with you
always."

Carrie Kinney was there that morning and Ned, and 'Ali Quli Khan
and Florence, Edna Ballora and her husband, Harriet Magee, Mrs
Parsons, and Mrs Hannen. The Master had invited Mamma too, but she
had not felt well enough to go.

"Rest assured," He said when I told Him, "that she will be healed."
And He filled my arms with fruit for her.

We drove to the boat, then followed Him up to His cabin. Many
believers were crowding the cabin. Later we all went upstairs and
sat in a large room with Him. Very soon He rose, and, walking up
and down, delivered to us His last spoken message.[134]

First He described heartbreakingly the war now raging in the
Balkans. Then He said: "As to you: your efforts must be lofty.
Exert yourselves with heart and soul that perchance through your
efforts the light of Universal Peace may shine and this darkness
of estrangement and enmity may be dispelled from amongst men ...

"You have no excuse to bring before God if you fail to live
according to His Command, for you are informed of that which
constitutes the good-pleasure of God ...

"It is My hope that you may become successful in this high calling,
so that like brilliant lamps you may cast light upon the world of
humanity and quicken and stir the body of existence like unto a
spirit of life.

"This is eternal glory. This is everlasting felicity. This is
immortal life. This is heavenly attainment. This is being created
in God's image and likeness. And unto this I call you, praying to
God to strengthen and bless you."

[Photograph: 'Abdu'l-Baha leaving America on the Celtic from New
York City.]

He seated Himself again in a corner of the large cabin, all the
believers flocked around Him. I sat opposite Him at a little
distance, weeping quietly. A great fear had taken possession of me,
a question risen in my mind which must be answered or I should have
no peace--I should be left in a frantic state. I rose and walked
over to Him and stood before Him.

"My Lord," I said, "each time I have parted from You: in Haifa, in
Europe, You have said You would call me again to You. Each time You
gave me hope that I would see You again. But this time You gave me
no hope. Won't I see You again, my Lord?"

"This is My hope," He replied.

"But still You don't tell me, my Lord, and it makes me feel
hopeless."

"You must not feel hopeless."

This was all He said to me. It killed me. While I sat, weighed down
with despair and grief, He drew from an inside pocket the purse Dr
Grant had sent Him last summer, laid it on His knee and looked at
me. To me it seemed a promise that He Himself would take care of
Percy. And this was the very last.

It was death to leave that ship. I stood on the pier with May
Maxwell, tears blurring my sight. Through them I could see the
Master in the midst of the group of Persians waving a patient hand
to us. It waved and waved, that beautiful patient hand, till the
Figure was lost to sight.

[Photograph: 'Abdu'l-Baha--the last photo taken in America, 1912.]

(1947. Because of those blurring tears I could not see the look on
His face, the look of profound agony, as though He were on the
cross, as He bade His immature children farewell, foreseeing for
us so many sorrows, so many failures, and a world gone to pieces
because of our failures.

This look I have seen ever since in a photograph taken at that last
moment.)

Diary of Juliet Thompson: Chapter 4 Chapter 3 Notes

'Abdu'l-Baha in America

25 March to 7 December 1912

To the attracted maid-servant of God, Juliet Thompson.

HE IS GOD!

O thou candle of the Love of God!

Thy numerous letters were received. According to the promise, by
the Will of God, I shall embark on the boat 25 March and in the
latter part reach Naples, where I shall stay a few days and from
thence start for New York.

Verily, this is great glad tidings. Upon thee by Baha'u'l-Abha.
(signed) Abdul Baha Abba. Translated in the Orient.

New York

Twelve o'clock, 25 March 1912

It is just midnight. TODAY the Master sails for America. I feel His
Presence strongly.

__________

Received March 25:

The Church of the Ascension. 5 Avenue and 10th Street.

23 March

My dear Juliet:

I understand that Abdul Baha is to arrive in New York 10
April--that is, in Easter week,--so that the 14 April would be his
first Sunday in New York.

If his friends in this city would feel any value or assistance in
having him speak at the eleven o'clock service in the Church of the
Ascension, in place of my sermon, I shall be more than happy to
invite him to the Ascension pulpit in my place. I should like to
show so important and splendid a person, and those who love him,
whatever hospitality and goodwill can be expressed in this town,
by such a plan.

If, however, his coming in the middle of the week means that he
ought to get more quickly into public contact with the city, which
may well be the case if his stay is brief, then I would offer the
Church of the Ascension to the committee in charge of his affairs
to

have any kind of service they please, in the daytime or evening,
between his arrival, let us say 10 April--and the following Sunday.

That is to say I make one of two propositions: to offer him my
pulpit Sunday, 14 April, at eleven a.m., or to offer the Church,
unhampered by any form of service, between the tenth and the
fourteenth.

Faithfully,

(signed) Percy S. Grant

__________

What will obedience bring forth, if half-obedience brings forth
this? I have refused all winter to see Percy Grant.

I wrote thanking him and asking him to get in touch with the
committee of arrangements, Mr Mills and Mr MacNutt.

__________

The Church of the Ascension. 5 Avenue and 10th Street.

28 March 1912

My dear Juliet:

I thank you for your nice letter about Abdul Baha. Whatever may
seem most agreeable to those having the matter in charge will be
altogether satisfactory to me.

Whatever I can do I hope you will allow me to do, to honour such
a distinguished visitor from the East--one so loved by my friends.

Believe me to be faithfully yours,

(signed) Percy S. Grant

8 April 1912

Little did I dream when I began this diary what I would write in
its closing pages! This morning I telephoned Percy.

"This is Juliet."

"Ah, Juliet."

"I want to tell you two things. First, 'Abdu'l-Baha is on the
Cedric and will arrive Wednesday morning. And--is your time very
full Thursday? For I think He will send for you almost at once."

"Wait. Let me get my card, Juliet. No, I have no engagements for
Thursday, except in the evening, and could come any time during the
day to see Him. I am very happy. I shall be very glad to see the
Master, Juliet."

"As soon as He arrives, someone will let you know."

I then brought up the second thing.

"I'd like to explain something," I said. "Has Dr Guthrie got into
touch with you?"

"No."

"Then I hardly need to explain. But it was this: Charles James had
heard some rumour that the Master was to speak in your church. He
mentioned this to Dr Guthrie, who immediately wanted to offer his
church, too. This morning a letter came from Dr Guthrie inviting
the Master to speak on the night of the fourteenth. I tell you all
this really to say that it was not through me Dr Guthrie heard of
your plans."

"I am a very easy person, Juliet, in misunderstandings."

"I know that."

"And I am glad Dr Guthrie has made the same offer that I have."

"No one has made the same offer you have."

It was then he repeated something he had said to Mr MacNutt; I
can't remember just what.

"That was beautiful of you," I answered.

"No, it was not. And Juliet: I don't want you to feel that this is
a favour. I want you to feel--to understand--that you have a
proprietary interest in the church: a proprietary interest; that
it is yours to give. The church is yours. The Parish House is
yours. The Rectory is yours.[88] We will ask the Master to the
Rectory and form little groups to meet Him. I don't want to bore
you, Juliet," (oh imagine him boring me!) "but I want you to feel
that it is yours, this house. Here it is, just at the end of the
street. Ask anyone to the Rectory, anyone you wish. You may
eliminate the Rector, if you would rather not have me here ..."
This and much more. He contradicted that last statement once. "I
want you," he said, with his appealing boyishness, "to come around
me again, Juliet." His voice broke. He stammered a little and
ended. "I am a tongue-tied person when it comes to strong feeling."

"I should like," I said, "to take you by the hand and lead you to
the Master myself."

"I want you to, Juliet. I don't want to do it any other way. I want
you to be there. I don't want to do it without you."

"Then we will meet on Thursday. We will see each other on Thursday
in His Presence. I think it will be beautiful to meet there."

"It will be the north and the south in His Presence, Juliet."

"The Master has loved you a long time, Percy, for your work."

"Some people say they are loved for their enemies, Juliet. If I am
loved, it is for my friends."

10 April 1912. 11:15 p.m.

Tomorrow He comes! Who comes? "Who is this that cometh from
Bozrah?"

This is a night of holy expectation. The air is charged with
sanctity. I can almost hear the Gloria in Excelsis.

How close He is tonight! Is it His prayers I feel? Why has earth
become suddenly divine?

Midnight

The Master comes TODAY!

11 April 1912

Oh day of days!

I was wakened this morning while it was yet dark by something
shining into my eyes. It was a ray from the moon, its waning
crescent framed low in my windowpane.

Symbol of the Covenant, was my first thought. How perfectly
beautiful to be wakened today by it! But at once I remembered
another time when I had seen the

waning moon hanging, then, above palm trees. I was on the roof of
the House in 'Akka with the Master and Munavvar Khanum. The Master
was pointing to the moon. "The East. The moon. No!" He said. "I am
the Sun of the West."

At dawn, kneeling at my window, I prayed in the swelling light for
all this land, now sleeping, that it would wake to received its
Lord; conscious, as I prayed, of an overshadowing Sacred Presence:
a great, glorious, burning Presence--the Sun of Love rising. This
fiery dawn was but a pale symbol of such a rising.

Between seven and eight I went to the pier with Marjorie Morten and
Rhoda Nichols. The morning was crystal clear, sparkling. I had a
sense of its being Easter: of lilies, almost seen, blooming at my
feet.

All the believers of New York had gathered at the pier to meet the
Master's ship. Marjorie and I had suggested to them that the Master
might not want this public demonstration, but their eagerness was
too great to be influenced by just two, and so we had gone along
with them--only too glad to do so, to tell the truth.

During the morning the harbour misted over. At last, in the mist
we saw: a phantom ship! And at that very moment some newsboys ran
through the crowd, waving Extras. "The Pope is dead! The Pope is
dead!" they shouted. The Pope was not dead. The Extras had been
printed only on a rumour; but what a symbol, and how exactly timed!

Closer and closer, ever more substantial, came that historic ship,
that epoch-making ship, till at last it swam out solid into the
light, one of the Persians sitting in the bow in his long robes,
'aba, and turban. This was Siyyid

Asadu'llah, a marvellous, witty old man, who had come with the
Master to prepare His meals.

He told us later that when the ship was approaching the harbour and
the Master saw, as His first view of America, the Wall Street
skyscrapers, He had laughed and said: "Those are the minarets of
the West."[89] What divine irony!

The ship docked, but the Master did not appear. Suddenly I had a
great glimpse. In the dim hall beyond the deck, striding to and fro
near the door, was One with a step that shook you! Just that one
stride, charged with power, the sweep of a robe, a majestic head,
turban crowned--that was all I saw, but my heart stopped.

Marjorie's instinct and mine had been true. Mr Kinney was called
for to come on board the ship. He returned with a disappointing
message. The Master sent us His love but wanted us to disperse now.
He would meet us all at the Kinneys' house at four.

Everyone obeyed at once except Marjorie, Rhoda, and myself!
Marjorie, who loves the Teachings but has never wholly accepted
them, said: "I can't leave till I've seen Him. I can't. I WON'T!"
So, though we followed the crowd to the street, we slipped away
there and looked around for some place to hide. Quite a distance
below the big entrance to the pier we saw a fairly deep embrasure
into which a window was set, with the stone wall jutting out from
it. Here we flattened ourselves against the window, Rhoda (who is
conspicuously tall) clasping a long white box of lilies which she
had brought for the Master. Just in front of the entrance stood Mr.

Mills' car, his chauffeur in it. Suddenly it rolled forward and,
to our utter dismay, parked directly in front of us. Now we were
caught: certain to be discovered. But there was no help for it, for
Marjorie still refused to budge till she had seen the Master.

Then, He came--through the entrance with Mr MacNutt and Mr Mills,
and turned and walked swiftly toward the car. In a panic we waited.

A few nights ago Marjorie and I had a double dream. In her dream,
I was out in space with her. In mine, we were in a room together
and the Master had just entered it. He walked straight up to
Marjorie, put His two hands on her shoulders and pressed and
pressed till she sank to her knees. And while she was sinking, she
lifted her face to His and everything in her seemed to be dying
except her soul, which looked out through her raised eyes in a sort
of agony of recognition.

Today, after one glance at the Master, this was just the way she
looked.

"Now," she said, "I know."

As the Master was stepping into the car, He turned and--smiled at
us.

__________

We met Him in the afternoon at the Kinneys'. When I arrived with
Marjorie, He was sitting in the centre of the dining room near a
table strewn with flowers. He wore a light pongee 'aba. At His
knees stood the Kinney children, Sanford and Howard, and His arms
were around them. He was very white and shining. No words could
describe His ineffable peace. The people stood about in rows and
circles: several hundred in the big rooms, which all open into each
other. In the dining room many sat on the floor, Marjorie and I
included. We

[Photograph: 'Abdu'l-Baha holding a child.]

made a dark background for His Glory. Only our tears reflected Him,
and almost everyone there was weeping just at the sight of Him. For
at last we saw divinity incarnate. Divinely He turned His head from
one child to the other, one group to another. I wish I could
picture that turn of the head--an oh, so tender turn, with that
indescribable heavenly grace caught by Leonardo da Vinci in his
Christ of the Last Supper (in the study for the head)--but in
'Abdu'l-Baha irradiated by smiles and a lifting of those eyes
filled with glory, which even Leonardo, for all his mystery, could
not have painted. The very essence of compassion, the most poignant
tenderness is in that turn of the head.

The next morning early the Master telephoned me (that is, Ahmad[90]
telephoned for Him) and nearly every morning after. Can you imagine
the sweetness of that--to be wakened every morning by a word from
Him? Sometimes He just inquired how I was, but often He called me
to Him.

When I first went to see Him He asked me only one question. "How
is your mother?"

"Not very well, my Lord."

"What is the matter?"

"She is grieving." And I told Him why. My brother is soon to be
married to a quite beautiful, brilliant girl who, however, doesn't
want to make friends with his family!

"Bring your mother to Me," He said. "I will comfort her."

He sent for her that very night. I was terribly afraid she wouldn't
go--she has been so opposed to my work in the

Cause--and Ahmad called up in the midst of a thunderstorm! But when
I took the message to her--that the Master wished her to come to
Him now--she jumped up from her chair and began to scurry around.

"Just wait till I get my rubbers," she said.

We found Him exhausted, lying on His bed. He had seen hundreds of
people that day, literally, at a big reception and in His own
rooms. Mamma, who is very shy and undemonstrative, rushed to the
bedside and fell on her knees.

"Welcome, welcome!" said the Master. "You are very welcome, Mrs
Thompson.

"You must be very thankful for your daughter. Praise be to God, she
is a daughter of the Kingdom. If she were an earthly daughter, of
what use would she be to you? At best she could do you a little
material good. But she is a heavenly daughter, a daughter of the
Kingdom. Therefore she is the means of drawing your soul nearer to
God. Her value to you is not apparent now. When one possesses a
thing its value is not realized. But you will realize later. Mary
Magdalene was but a villager; she was even scorned by the people,
but now her name moves the whole earth, and in the Kingdom of God
she is very near. Your daughter is kind to you. If your son is
faithless, she is faithful. She will become dearer and dearer to
you. She will take the place of your son. But in the end your son
will be very good. This is only temporary.

"I became very grieved today when, upon inquiring for you, I heard
of your sorrow. And now I want to comfort you. Trust in God. God
is kind. God is faithful. God never forgets you. If others are
unkind what difference does it make when God is kind? When God is
on your

side it does not matter what men do to you. But your son will be
good in the end.

"God is kind to you. And I am going to be kind to you. And I am
faithful!"

Mamma, still on her knees, bent and kissed His hand. "Tell the
Master," she said to Ahmad, "I have always loved Him. Lua knows
that." (If Lua knew, I certainly didn't.)

"I have no need of a witness," the Master answered, so tenderly.
"My heart knows."

The next day Mamma said to me: "All my bitterness has gone. The
Master must be helping me."[91]

It was on Saturday, 13 April, that Mamma and I visited the Master.
On Friday He had called me early, asking me to meet Him at the
MacNutts'.

I shall never cease to see Him as He looked speaking from their
stairway, standing below a stained glass window in a ray of
sunlight, the powerful head, the figure in its flowing robes,
outlined in light.

The Master has a strange quality of beautifying His environment,
of throwing a glamour over it and blotting out the ugly. The
MacNutts' house is ugly; the one redeem-

ing feature of that stairway, its window. All I saw as the Master
stood there was Himself, the window, the ray of light. His words
lifted my soul on wings!

In the evening Friday He spoke in Miss Phillips' studio. The
enormous room was packed. At his dear invitation I sat [on] His
right (I suppose because I had given Miss Phillips the Message);
Marjorie at His left near Him. In the simple setting of that
studio, its overhead light filling the deep forms of His face with
shadow, He looked ruggedly, powerfully beautiful. His words I will
not give. They have been kept.[92]

The very day He arrived, Thursday, the Master sent for Percy Grant,
but He appointed Friday to see him, in the afternoon. I was not
invited to the interview, so in spite of the happy arrangement
Percy and I had made, I knew I should have to stay away. Nor was
I told very much about it, only that the Master had planned with
Dr Grant to accept his church for Sunday (the fourteenth) for His
first address in New York, choosing the Church of the Ascension out
of thirteen other--and some of the clergy had even wired to
Gibraltar offering their pulpits for that date! And one other very
little thing (Mr MacNutt himself gave me this scrap of news): as
he was standing with Dr Grant at the elevator after leaving the
Master's suite, Dr Grant said to him: "You can't help but love the
old gentleman."

To me Percy put it more elegantly: "The Master compels one's love
and esteem. What He radiates is peace and love."

[Photograph: 'Abdu'l-Baha in New York in the garden of Howard
MacNutt, 1912.]

Saturday, 13 April, the Master spoke at Marjorie Morten's.[93]
Again, because of the crowd, He spoke from the stairway, dominating
all the beauty of Marjorie's long drawing room, with its rich
colour and carvings and masterly paintings, by His superlative
beauty.

His theme that day was the spiritual seasons, and in the midst of
His talk a delicious thing happened which, slight though it was,
I want to keep. In its very slightness it may draw the people of
the future closer to the Master, just as it drew us.

These tender little touches of His humour and simplicity, bridging
for the moment the infinite space between us and His pure
Perfection, making His Divinity accessible: how precious, how
heavenly sweet they are, of what unique value! The disciples of
Christ, looking beyond that awful chasm of the crucifixion into the
mystery of their days with Him, were, I suppose, awed into silence
about the little things--the adorable little things. So the Man of
sorrow has been just the Man of sorrow to us. We have never formed
any conception of the Man of love and joy, great buoyant joy; a
Christ whose Love overflowed into little tendernesses and Whose joy
overflowed into fun and wit--a happy, smiling, laughing Christ. And
yet I am sure He was that.

But now to tell of this small thing. With His celestial eloquence
the Master had described the spiritual springtime.

"Va tabistan," He began and paused for Ahmad to translate.

Dead silence. Poor Ahmad had lost the English word.

But while he stood helpless, the Master supplied it Himself.

"Summer!" He laughed. Whereupon a little ripple of delight ran
through the audience. His charm had captured them all.

After the meeting He went up to rest in Mr Morten's room. He had
seen a hundred and forty people that morning and was so worn out
at the end of His talk that He looked almost ill. His fatigue was
apparent to everyone--and yet the people had no pity. When I
returned from an errand to the kitchen, literally hundreds were
streaming toward His room; a dozen were in the room; in the hall
were many peering faces, and climbing up the stairs--a procession!

"Oh can't we shut the door?" I asked Dr Farid. But the Master heard
me.

"Let them come now," He said gently.

A mother with a baby stood near the door. The Master took the baby
from her and tenderly pressed it to His heart. "Beautiful baby!
Little chicken!" He said in His dear English; then explained that
"little chicken" was the Turkish pet name for child.

A young single-taxer[94] began to question Him. "What message shall
I take to my friends?" he ended.

"Tell them," laughed the Master (that wonderful spicy humour in His
face) "to come into the Kingdom of God. There they will find plenty
of land and there are no taxes on it."

Sunday. Oh, Sunday!

At the Master's own invitation I met Him at the Rectory, a half
hour before the service.

As Miss Barry was holding her Sunday school class downstairs, we
were invited upstairs, to the back room on the second floor. There,
with the Master and the Persians and Edward Getsinger, I waited in
supreme happiness. Very soon Percy came in. Approaching the Master,
he bent his head reverently.

"In New Testament language," he said, "this would be called an
upper chamber."[95]

The Master smiled sweetly and took his hand.

After he left, the Master turned to me. "This is a dish you have
cooked for Me, Juliet," He laughed.

"I hope it is cooked all the way through!"

"Insha'llah," smiled the Master.

"I have more dishes to serve to You when You are rested," I
ventured.

"I hope they are light," He replied, "and will rest easily on My
digestion. Most of these dishes are so heavy!"

I inquired for dear Ruha Khanum, who has been very ill.

"I have put her in the hands of the Blessed Perfection," said our
Lord, "and now I don't worry at all."

He spoke of my mother very lovingly.

"Tell her to trust in God," He repeated. "Tell her that God is
faithful. Read the Hidden Words to her."

The time came to go to the church. The Persians, Edward Getsinger,
and I went first: marching in, as Percy had planned it, with the
processional, bringing up the rear of the processional! For nearly
a year I hadn't once entered the Church of the Ascension; and now,
what a very surprising return!

The Master waited in the vestry-room.

When I try to express the perfection of that service--I mean, the
arrangement of it--I can find no words. It was the conception of
an artist, of a true poet. The altar and the whole chancel were
banked with calla lilies. On the back of the Bishop's chair hung
a victor's wreath, an exact reproduction of the Greek victor's
wreath, classically simple: a small oval of laurel with its leaves
free at the top. Its meaning went to my heart.

Dr Grant read first a prophecy from the Old Testament pointing
directly to this Day, to Baha'u'llah; then the thirteenth Chapter
of Corinthians. These were not the lessons for the day but
specially chosen.

At the end of the Second Lesson, just as the choir began to sing
in a great triumphant outburst "Jesus Lives!" 'Abdu'l-Baha with
that step of His, which has been described as the walk of either
a shepherd or a king, entered the chancel, "suddenly come to His
Temple!" Percy Grant had quietly left his seat and gone into the
vestry-room and had returned with the Master, holding His hand. For
a moment they stood at the altar beneath that fine mural, The
Resurrection by John La Farge; then with beautiful deference Percy
led the Master to the Bishop's chair. (This broke the nineteenth
canon of the Episcopal Church, which forbids the unbaptized to sit
behind the altar rail!)

The prayers over, Dr Grant made a short introductory address,
speaking not from the pulpit but the chancel steps. Never shall I
forget what I saw then. Percy, strong and erect, with his
magnificently set head ("like the head of some Viking" as Howard
MacNutt says), giving, with a fire even greater than usual--with
a strange, sparkling magnetism--the Baha'i Message to his congre-

gation; and behind him: a flashing Face, unlike the face of any
mortal, haloed by the victor's wreath, visibly inspiring him. For
with every flash from those eyes, which were fixed on Dr Grant,
would appear a fresh charge of energy in him. There was something
wonderfully rhythmic in this transmission of fire to the words and
the delivery of the man speaking. Was it the sign of some
susceptibility in this hitherto unyielding man to the power of
'ABDU'L-BAHa? Or was it just that Power: transcendent,
irresistible, quickening whom it chose?

"May the Lord lift the light of His Countenance upon you." Ah, what
happens when the Lord does!

How can I tell of that moment when the Master took the place of
Percy Grant on the chancel steps? When, standing in His flowing
robes there, He turned His unearthly Face to the people and
said:[96] "Dr Grant has just read from the thirteenth Chapter of
Corinthians that the day would come when you would see face to
face."

It was too great to put into words; it was almost too great to
bear. The pain of intense rapture pierced my heart. Could the
people fail to recognize? Oh, had they recognized what would He not
have revealed to them? But He could go no further. He swerved to
another subject.

"I have come hither," He said, "to find that material civilization
has progressed greatly, but the spiritual civilization has been
left behind. The material civilization is likened unto the glass
of a lamp chimney. The spiritual civilization is like the light in
that chimney. The material civilization should go hand-in-hand with

the spiritual civilization. Material civilization may be likened
unto a beautiful body, while spiritual civilization is the spirit
that enters the body and gives to it life. With the propelling
power of spiritual civilization the result will be greater.

"His Holiness Jesus Christ came to this world that the people might
have through Him the civilization of Heaven, a spirit of oneness
with God. He came to breathe the spirit into the body of the world.
There must be oneness in the world of man. When this takes place
we will have the Most Great Peace.

"Today the body politic needs the oneness of the world and
universal peace. But to spread the feeling of peace and firmly
implant it in the minds of men a certain propelling Power is
required.

"It is self-evident that spiritual civilization cannot be
accomplished through material means, for the interests of the
various nations differ. It is self-evident that it cannot be
accomplished through patriotism, for countries differ in their
ideas of patriotism. It is impossible save through spiritual power.
Compared with this all other means are too weak to bring about
universal peace.

"Man has two wings: his material power and development, and his
spiritual understanding and achievements. With one wing alone he
cannot fly. Therefore, no matter how far material civilization
advances, without the other, great things cannot be accomplished.
... Humanity, generally speaking, is immersed in a sea of
materiality ..."

Dr Grant asked the Master to give the benediction. Apparently He
gave no blessing but asked for one for us.

Against His high background of lilies He stood, His face uplifted
in prayer, His eyes closed, the palms of His

hands uplifted. I seemed to feel streams of Life descending,
filling those cupped hands. On either side of Him knelt the
clergymen, facing the altar. Percy Grant's head was bowed low. It
was a breathless moment. Then the Master raised His resonant voice
and chanted.

The recessional hymn was "Christ our Lord has risen again."

How can words tell what I realized, or thought I realized, at that
incomparable service?

This church had been my cross for years, from which I had never
been able to escape--though twice I had made the attempt, twice
wrenching myself away, only to be guided back by what seemed to me
in each instance the clear Will of God, expressed through a
striking miracle. Guided back to mortal pain. Was I seeing, this
morning, divine results of this pain?

And not only had I suffered more vitally here than in any other
place, prayed more passionately; not only had it been the scene of
my deepest inner conflict, but the cause of all this had been
dramatically enacted here. Here in this pulpit, with all his great
force, his disturbing magnetism and the fire of his eloquence,
Percy Grant had opposed my unshakeable belief, thundering
denunciations of "the subtle", "the Machiavellian Oriental" (God
forgive me for quoting this)--of the slumbering and superstitious
Orient--the Orient that brought to the West "nothing but disease
and death"--determined to conquer this Faith of mine which made me
resistant to him. He had even gone so far as to openly name "the
Baha'i sect" in his pulpit and to warn his flock against it.

And now, framing that matchless head of the Master, who sat there
so still in His Glory, hung the victor's

wreath! Oh for words vivid and sublime enough to make you see Him
sitting there, in the very spot where He had been so violently
denied!

The Master took me back into the Rectory, into the big, dark front
room. Percy rushed in for a moment, still in his surplice, his
cheeks flushed, his eyes very bright and blue.

"Juliet," he called, looking in from the dining room, "ask if the
Master wants anything: tea, coffee, water--anything; then tell
Thomas" (the butler).

But the Master wanted nothing except to wait to see Dr Grant (who
was being detained in the church) and He filled me with
indescribable joy by inviting me to wait with Him, sitting beside
Him.

I sat there, happier it seemed to me than I had ever been in my
life. I was in the Presence of my Lord, and the one I loved best
in all this human world had at last recognized Him. For what else
had that exquisite service meant, with the Resurrection stressed
all through it? Such a bold acknowledgement, such a daring action
in the very church itself could not have been insincere. It never
occurred to me to doubt it.

But time passed and Percy did not come back. A great crowd arrived
before he did. Someone, using the private way from the church, had
left the door open and the people began to surge in. And then
(while my heart sank with disappointment) the Master made a swift
exit.

Too late Mrs Grant, Percy's dear mother, entered the room. It was
a dramatic entrance. She ran in, distractedly, glancing from side
to side, obviously looking for the Master. Not seeing Him there,
she exclaimed: "If only I could have had His blessing! That Figure
makes me think of the plains of Judea."

At that very instant Mr Mills, who had gone out with

the Master, reappeared. "'Abdu'l-Baha," he said, "is asking for Mrs
Grant."

I stood at the street door and watched. The Master was sitting in
Mr Mills' car, just in front of the house. I saw Mrs Grant approach
it, kneel in the street and bow her head. I saw Him place His hands
on her head.

A year ago I had a dream. I was in the People's Forum, stooping and
kissing Mrs Grant. She looked up through tears. "I have seen the
Master," she said in my dream. "He spoke to me. Oh there was never
such a Face in the world!"

Now, on the steps of the Rectory, as she returned from the car, she
looked up through tears.

"I got my blessing, Juliet," she said, "and I didn't have to ask
for it."

I went back to the church to thank Percy Grant and found him alone.
His last parishioner had just gone. For a moment we stood with
clasped hands.

"You made everything so beautiful. I can't find the right words to
thank you."

"My darling," he said, "my darling--"

Something in his look--something false--woke me. Sick at heart, I
turned away.[97]

That night how I hungered to see the Master. My heart burned to see
Him. I went to the telephone. Ah, these days when just by a
telephone call we can reach Him! One of the Persians answered my
call.

"Is the Master well tonight? Is He resting?" I asked.

"He is in His room, reading Tablets."

__________

The next morning, through Ahmad, the Master telephoned me. He
wanted to know how I was.

"Tell Him my heart is burning for Him just as it used to in Haifa."

"The Master says: come at once to Him."

And scarcely was I seated in His room when He began to speak of
Percy Grant. He spoke with great love, with great appreciation of
the service Percy had rendered, but told me to be very careful in
my relations with him.

"You must keep your acquaintance, Juliet, absolutely formal."

Then He gave me this message: "Convey to Dr Grant My greetings.
Say: I will not forget the services thou hast rendered yesterday.
They are engraved on the book of My heart. I will mention thy name
everywhere. And know thou this: This matter of yesterday will
become most wonderful in the history of the world. The world of
existence will not forget yesterday. Thousands of years hence the
mention of yesterday will be heard and it will become history that
you were the founder of this work.

"I ask of God for you all those things I have asked for Myself and
they are: that thou mayest become a sincere servant of God and
serve in the Kingdom of God and become sanctified and holy; that
thou mayest find a pure and enlightened heart, an illumined face;
become the cause that the lights of spiritual morals may illumine
the hearts in this country and that they may be illumined in the
world of the Kingdom; become the promoter of Truth and deliver the
souls from ignorance and prejudice. I supplicate to the Kingdom of
God for you, and I will never forget the love that was manifested
yesterday.

"I hope," said the Master, turning to me, "that he will become a
believer, but I do not know. The rectorship of that church is in
the way. If he could give it up of his own volition, then he might
become a believer."

He spoke of my dear mother: "Convey to thy mother the greetings of
Abha. Say to her: Always remember My advices. It is my hope that
thou mayest forget everything save God. Nothing in this world is
sufficient for man. God alone is sufficient for him. God is the
Protector of man. All the world will not protect the soul."

I sent Percy Grant the message and later he telephoned me.

"That was a wonderful, wonderful message," he said, his voice
strangely upset.

__________

Early Sunday evening, the fourteenth, the Master spoke at the
Carnegie Lyceum for the Union Meeting of Advanced Thought
Centres.[98] I can give you no idea of His Glory that night. He was
like a pillar of white fire.

I sat in a box with Bolton Hall, one of our fashionable
intellectuals, a lean, elegant person with an Emersonian face.
Turning to him for a moment, I asked: "What do you see?"

"Nothing, dear child, nothing."

16 April 1912

This morning the Master agreed to speak at the Bowery Mission.

"I want to give them some money," He said to me. "I am in love with
the poor. How many poor men go to the Mission?"

"About three hundred, my Lord."

"Take this bill to the bank, Juliet, and change it into quarters,"
and He drew from His pocket a thousand-

franc note.[99] "Have them put the quarters in a bag. Keep the
money and meet Me at the Mission with it."

He handed another thousand-franc note, with the same instructions,
to Edward Getsinger.

As I left His room, lilies of valley in my hand, a young
chambermaid stopped me. "Did He give you those?" she asked. "He
gave me some flowers yesterday. Roses. I think He is a great
Saint."

__________

Later, May Maxwell and I were together in the Master's room. He was
lying back on His pillow, May's baby crawling over Him, feeding
first the baby, then May and me with chocolates.[100] On the pillow
beside Him was the victor's wreath, which He always kept near Him.
Suddenly He brought up Percy's name.

"I love Dr Grant," he began. "He has rendered Me a great service.
I love him very much, but I want you to be careful."

"My Lord, I believe my heart is severed," I said. "I don't know but
I believe so."

He looked at me with arch incredulity: "No? Really?" He said.

May laughed.

"What do you know about it?" the Master asked.

"May knows everything about it."

"Well, has she helped you? How far has her help gone? Has it been
sufficient for you?"

"She has helped me, but only God is sufficient when love has gone
as deep as that."

"I know. Now, can you transfer this love to God?"

[Photograph of 'Abdu'l-Baha walking down Riverside Drive in New
York, 1912]

"To God I can. To You."

"No. To God."

"Yes ... I can ... to God."

"That will be enough! I shall try to make no more marriages,"
laughed the Master. "When you have really given up," He added, "he
will come after you."[101]

"I love Dr Grant," He continued, "very, very much, but I want to
protect you."

"May I ask a question?" said May. "If Juliet put the thought of Dr
Grant forever out of her mind, would this be good?"

But the Master answered evasively: "If he would become a believer
and marry Juliet it would please Me very much."

"Don't we tire You?" I asked a little later. "Oughtn't we to leave
You now?"

"No, stay. You rest Me. You make Me laugh!" He answered.

18 April 1912

I asked Mrs Wright if she would invite Percy to hear the Master
speak at the Bowery Mission. His reply has just come through her.
He said: "Give Juliet my love and my excuses. Tell her I prefer to
be remembered by Him in the Church of the Ascension. Tell her this
and she will understand."

__________

Before writing of the Master's visit to the Bowery I must explain
how it came about. In February this year

Dr Hallimond asked me for the third time to give the Baha'i Message
at the Mission. I had refused twice before because my dear mother
wouldn't allow me to go there. But this third invitation I felt I
must accept. So, for the first time in my life, I deceived Mamma!
Silvia Gannett helped me out. (By the way her marriage has been
postponed.) She invited me to dine, then went to the Mission with
me. The only thing Mamma knew was that I was dining with Silvia.

The weather that night was terrible: snowing, sleeting, bitterly
cold. The Mission was packed with homeless men, some of whom had
been driven in by the cold and the storm and were there for no
other reason. Among these, I learned afterward, was John Good--may
he ever be blessed! Wonderfully named was John Good! He had been
released from Sing Sing that very day: an enormous man with a head
like a lion and a great shock of white hair. From his boyhood he
had spent his life in one prison or another and now, in his old
age, had behaved so rebelliously in Sing Sing that they would
punish him in the most painful way, hanging him up by his thumbs!
Full of hate he had come out of prison, and full of hate and
without one grain of belief in anything, he sat among the derelicts
in the Mission, forced in by the storm.

And that night (knowing nothing of John Good) I was moved to tell
the men how 'Abdu'l-Baha came out of prison, full of love for the
whole world, even His cruellest enemies.

After I had finished speaking, Dr Hallimond said: "We have heard
from Juliet Thompson that 'Abdu'l-Baha will be here in April. How
may of you would like to invite Him to speak at the Mission? Will
those who wish it please stand?"

The whole three hundred rose to their feet.

"Now," added Dr Hallimond, taking me by surprise, "how many would
like to study the thirteenth Chapter of Corinthians with Miss
Thompson and myself?"

Thirty rose this time, including John Good and a poor alcoholic
named Hannegan, a long, lanky, red-haired Irishman.

"Then we will meet every Wednesday at eight p.m. and learn
something about this Love of which 'Abdu'l-Baha is our Great
Example."

And every Wednesday evening after that John Good and Hannegan came,
with the twenty-eight others.

Of course, in order to help Dr Hallimond on these nights, I had had
to confess to Mamma this first visit to the Bowery, and she was so
touched by the story that she gladly consented to my keeping up the
work, especially as Dr Hallimond always came for me and brought me
home.

__________

And now to return to the immediate present. Day before yesterday,
19 April, the Master spoke at the Bowery Mission.

I met Him in the chapel, dragging along with me the huge white bag
of quarters. Edward also appeared with a bag of the same size and
we sat behind the Master on the platform. Mr MacNutt, Mr Mills, Mr
Grundy, and Mr Hutchinson, and of course all the Persians, were
seated there too. The long hall was packed to the doors with those
poor derelicts who sleep on park benches or doorsteps.

Dr Hallimond called upon me to introduce my Lord, which seemed so
presumptuous I could scarcely do it.

Then the Master rose to speak. Here are His heavenly

words:[102] "Tonight I am very happy for I have come here to meet
My friends. I consider you my relatives, My companions, and I am
your comrade.

"You must be thankful to God that you are poor, for His Holiness
Jesus Christ has said: 'Blessed are the poor.' He never said:
blessed are the rich! He said too that the Kingdom is for the poor
and that it is easier for a camel to enter the needle's eye than
for a rich man to enter God's Kingdom. Therefore you must be
thankful to God that although in this world you are indigent, yet
the treasures of God are within your reach, and although in the
material realm you are poor, yet in the Kingdom of God you are
precious.

"His Holiness Jesus Himself was poor. He did not belong to the
rich. He passed His time in the desert travelling among the poor
and lived upon the herbs of the field. He had no place to lay His
head--no home. He was exposed in the open to heat, cold, and frost.
Yet He chose this rather than riches. If riches were considered a
glory, the Prophet Moses would have chosen them; Jesus would have
been rich.

"When Jesus appeared it was the poor who first accepted Him, not
the rich. Therefore, you are His disciples, you are His comrades,
for outwardly He was poor, not rich.

"Even this earth's happiness does not depend upon wealth. You will
find many of the wealthy exposed to dangers and troubled by
difficulties, and in their last moments upon the bed of death,
there remains the regret that they must be separated from that to
which their

hearts are so attached. They come into this world naked and they
must go from it naked. All they possess they must leave behind and
pass away solitary, alone. Often at the time of death their souls
are filled with remorse and, worst of all, their hope in the mercy
of God is less than ours.

"Praise be to God, our hope is in the mercy of God; and there is
no doubt that the divine Compassion is bestowed upon the poor. His
Holines Jesus Christ said so; His Holiness Baha'u'llah said so.

"While Baha'u'llah was in Baghdad, still in possession of great
wealth, He left all He had and went alone from the city, living two
years among the poor. They were His comrades. He ate with them,
slept with them, and gloried in being one of them. He chose for one
of His names the title of 'The Poor One' and often in His Writings
refers to Himself as 'Darvish,' which in Persian means poor. And
of this title he was very proud. He admonished all that we must be
the servants of the poor, helpers of the poor, remember the sorrows
of the poor, associate with them, for thereby we may inherit the
Kingdom of Heaven.

"God has not said that there are mansions prepared for us if we
pass our time associating with the rich, but He has said there are
many mansions prepared for the servants of the poor, for the poor
are very dear to God. The mercies and bounties of God are with
them. The rich are mostly negligent, inattentive, steeped in
worldliness, depending upon their means, whereas the poor are
dependent upon God and their reliance is upon Him, not upon
themselves. Therefore the poor are nearer the Threshold of God and
His Throne.

"Jesus was a poor man. One night when He was out in the fields the
rain began to fall. He had no place to go for shelter, so He lifted
His eyes toward Heaven, saying: 'O Father! For the birds of the air
Thou hast created nests, for the sheep a fold, for the animals
dens, for the fishes places of refuge, but for Me Thou hast
provided no shelter; there is no place where I may lay My head. My
bed is the cold ground, My lamps at night are the stars and My food
is the grass of the field. Yet who upon earth is richer than I? For
the greatest blessing Thou hast not given to the rich and mighty,
but unto Me Thou hast given the poor. To Me Thou hast granted this
blessing. They are Mine. Therefore I am the richest man on earth.'

"So, My comrades, you are following in the footsteps of Jesus
Christ. Your lives are similar to His life, your attitude is like
unto His, you resemble Him more than the rich resemble Him.
Therefore we will thank God that we have been blest with the real
riches. And, in conclusion, I ask you to accept 'Abdu'l-Baha as
your Servant."

After the service, the Master and we who were with Him walked down
the aisle to the door, while the men in the audience kept their
seats. At the end of the aisle the Master paused, called to Edward
and me and asked us to stand on each side of Him, with our bags.
He was wearing His pongee 'aba and was very shining in white and
ivory, His Face like a lighted lamp.

Then down the aisle streamed a sodden and grimy procession: three
hundred men in single file. The "breadline". The failures. Broken
forms. Blurred faces. How can I picture such a scene? That forlorn
host out of the depths, out of the "mud and scum of things"--where
nevertheless "something always, always sings". And the

Eternal Christ, reflected in the Mirror of "The Servant", receiving
them all, like prodigal sons? stray sheep? No! Like His own beloved
children, who "resembled Him more than the rich resembled Him."

Into each palm, as the Master clasped it, He pressed His little
gift of silver: just a symbol and the price of a bed. Not a man was
shelterless that night. And many, many, I could see, found a
shelter in His Heart. I could see it in the faces raised to His and
in His Face bent to theirs.

Those interchanged looks--what a bounty to have witnessed them--to
have such a picture stamped on my mind forever!

As the men filed toward Him, the Master held out His hand to the
first, grasped the man's hand and left something in it. Perhaps
five or six quarters, for John Good told me afterward that the
completely destitute ones received the most. The man glanced up
surprised. His eyes met the Master's look, which seemed to be
plunging deep into his heart with fathomless understanding. He,
this poor derelict, must have known very little of even human love
or understanding; and now, too suddenly, he stood face to face with
Divine Love. He looked startled, incredulous--as though he couldn't
believe what he saw; then his eyes strained toward the Master,
something new burning in them, and the Master's eyes answered with
a great flash, revealing a more mysterious, a profounder love. A
drowning man rescued, or--taken up into heaven? I saw this repeated
scores of times. Some of the men shuffled past, accepting their
gift ungraciously, but most of them responded just as the first
did.

Who can tell the effect of those immortal glances on

the lives and even, perhaps, at the death of each of these men? Who
knows what the Master gave that night?

__________

(Footnote. Months later John Good told me about Hannegan. Hannegan
was a generous man. If he had a dime and somebody needed a nickel,
he would split his dime. But, there was no doubt about it, he was
also a Bowery tough and pretty nearly always drunk. He had been
counting the days to the nineteenth of April but, unluckily lost
count, and when the nineteenth came and with it the Master's visit
to the Bowery, he was in one of his stupors. Waking up from it, he
really sorrowed. Still, there was another chance. The Master was
to speak in Flatbush the following Sunday and somehow Hannegan
heard of this. Flatbush is a long way off and that Sunday he hadn't
even a nickel. So he walked. At midnight John Good went to his room
and found him in the usual state. "Why did you do it this time,
Hannegan--and you straight from seeing the Master?" asked John.
"That's just it," said Hannegan earnestly. "I'm straight from
seeing Him. Why, John, He's Perfection. The Light of the world, He
is, John. It's too much for a man, too discouraging."

John never told me this till after the death of Hanegan, or I would
have taken him to the Master. But, after all, he--this Bowery
tough--had seen the Reality.)

__________

That night the Master had a supper for all who had been with Him
at the Mission. It was held in His suite at the Ansonia and He took
me and two of the Persians, Valiyu'llah Khan and Ahmad, in His own
taxi to the hotel.

As we drove up Broadway, glittering with its electric

signs, He spoke of them smiling, apparently much amused. Then He
told us that Baha'u'llah had loved light. "He could never get
enough light. He taught us," the Master said, "to economize in
everything else but to use light freely."

"It is marvellous," I said, "to be driving through all this light
by the side of the Light of lights."

"This is nothing," the Master answered. "This is only the
beginning. We will be together in all the worlds of God. You cannot
realize here what that means. You cannot imagine it. You can form
no conception here in this elemental world of what it is to be with
Me in the Eternal Worlds."

"Oh," I cried, "with such a future before me how could my heart
cling to any earthly object?"

The Master turned suddenly to me. "Will you do this thing?" He
asked. "Will you take your heart from this other and give it wholly
to God?"

"Oh, I will try!"

He laughed heartily at this. "First you say you will and then that
you will try!"

"That is because I have learned my own weakness. What can I do with
my heart?"

And now the Master spoke gravely. "I am very much pleased with that
answer, Juliet."

__________

That night I saw, as never before, the Glory of 'Abdu'l-Baha.

Nine of us were gathered at His table. He sat at the head, Mr Mills
on His left, I on His right. Just above Him hung a big round lamp,
so that He sat in a pool of strong light while the rest of us were
in shadow. In His

ivory-coloured 'aba over the long white robe, His white hair spread
out upon His shoulders, He was like some massive statue of a deity
carved in alabaster.

For a while He was silent and we surrounded Him, silent. But after
He had served the food He began to speak. He told us of the play
The Terrible Meek which he had seen that afternoon. It is based on
the Crucifixion.

"But such a representation should be complete," He said, and taken
from its inception to its consummation. It should be an
impersonation of the life of Jesus from the beginning to the end.

"For example: His baptism. The disciples of John the Baptist
turning to Him, Jesus. The dawn of Christianity. Then the Christ
in the Temple, well portrayed. The meeting of Jesus and Peter on
the shore of Tiberias, where Jesus called Peter to follow Him that
he might become a fisher of men. The gathering together of the
Jews. Their accusations against Jesus. For they said: 'We are
expecting certain conditions at the time of the appearance of the
Messiah and unless these conditions are fulfilled it is impossible
to believe. It is written that He will come from an unknown place.
Thou are from Nazareth. We know Thee and Thy people. According to
the explicit text of the Scriptures, the Messiah is to wield a
sceptre, a sword. Thou hast not even a staff. The Messiah is to be
established on the throne of David. But Thou--a throne! Thou hast
not so much as a mat. The Messiah is to fulfil the Law of Moses,
which will be spread throughout the world. Thou hast broken the
Mosaic Law. The Jews, in the time of the Messiah, are to be the
conquerors of the world and all men will become their subjects. In
the Cycle of the Messiah justice is to

reign. It will be exercised even in the animal kingdom, so that
wolf and lamb will quaff water at the same fountain, eagle and
quail will dwell in the same nest, lion and deer pasture in the
same meadow. But see the oppression and wrong rampant in Thy time!
The Jews are the captives of the Romans. Rome has uprooted our
foundations, pillaging and killing us. What manner of justice is
this?'

"But His Holiness Jesus answered: 'These texts are symbolic. They
have an inner meaning. I possess sovereignty, but it is of the
eternal type. It is not an earthy empire. Mine is divine, heavenly,
everlasting. And I conquer not by the sword. My conquests are by
Love. I have a sword, but it is not of iron. My sword is My tongue,
which divides Truth from falsehood.'

"Yet they persisted in rejecting Him. 'These are mere
interpretations,' they said. 'We will not give up the letter for
these.'

"Then they rose against Him, accusing and persecuting Him,
inventing libels according to their superstitions.

"'He is a liar. He is the false Christ. Believe Him not. Beware
lest ye listen. He will mislead you, will lure you from the
religion of your fathers, and will create a turmoil amongst you.'

"Then the scribes and Pharisees consult together: 'Let us hold a
conclave and conceive a plan. This man is a deceiver. We must do
something. What?'" (The Master gaily mimicked their confusion.)
"'Let us expel Him from the country. Let us imprison Him. Ah! Let
us refer the matter to the government. Thus the religion of Moses
shall be free of Him.'

"After this, the betrayal of Jesus, not by an enemy, not by an
outsider, but by one of His own disciples. Dr

Farid! (I was startled by the sudden, peremptory call of that
name.) "By one of His own disciples. Had you been there, Dr Farid.
Had you been there, you would have seen that Mary of Magdala even
looked like Juliet."[103]

"Then," continued the Master, "the government will summon Jesus,
will bring Him before Pontius Pilate, and these scenes should be
fully portrayed ..."

Here I ceased to take notes. I was stabbed to the heart. As He
flashed each scene to us with His vivid words and gestures I felt
that He was reliving it. When He came to that walk to Golgotha:
Jesus, the Saviour, stumbling beneath the weight of His Cross while
the mob capered about, bowing backward, mocking "the King of the
Jews," I knew He was telling us of remembered anguish.

"And when all this is finished," He said, "then the Terrible Meek
will be expressed."

The last scene centred around the disciples, united now and ablaze
with the Pentecostal fire. The Master described them surrounded by
multitudes, teaching with those "tongues of fire" that His Holiness
Jesus had verily been a King--the King of spirits, His sword the
Word of God and His reign in the hearts of men.

When the Master had ended we sat so silent that the falling of a
rose leaf might have been heard. He broke the silence.

"The voice of Mary lamenting at the Cross today made me think of
your voice, Juliet--and Lua's." And then He smiled at me. "Eat,
Juliet," He said. For the food on my plate was untouched.

__________

In the upper hall, on our way to the Master's suite, we had met the
little chambermaid who had told me the day

before that she thought Him a great Saint. In my bag were about
eighty quarters left over from the Mission. The Master asked the
girl to hold up her apron, took the bag from me, and emptied the
whole of its contents into the apron. Then He walked quickly toward
His suite, we following, all but Mr Grundy whom the maid stopped.

"Oh see what He has given me!" she said. And when Mr Grundy told
her about the Mission and the Master's kindness to the men there,
"I will do the same with this money. I will give away every cent
of it."

Later, when the table was cleared and we were sitting with the
Master in another room, talking of the scene at the Mission,
someone asked Him if "charity were advisable."

He laughed and, still laughing, said: "Assuredly, give to the poor.
If you give them only words, when they put their hands into their
pockets after you have gone, they will find themselves none the
richer for you!"

And just at that moment we heard a light tap at the door. It opened
and there stood the little maid. She came straight towards the
Master, seeming not to see anyone else, and her eyes were full of
tears.

"I wanted to say goodbye, Sir," she said (for the Master was
leaving for Washington early the next morning), "and to thank You
for all Your goodness to me--I never expected such goodness--and
to ask You ... to pray for me." Her voice broke. She sobbed, hid
her face in her apron and rushed from the room.

What an illustration to the Master's words, "assuredly give to the
poor," and how wonderfully timed!

22 April 1912

Oh, those mornings at the Ansonia in the Master's white sunny
rooms, filled with spring flowers and roses!

People poured in to see Him in droves, sometimes a hundred and
fifty in one morning. He would become exhausted and receive the
latest arrivals in bed. Sitting in the outer room (though
frequently called to Him), I would watch them go into His bedroom
and come out changed, as though they had had a bath of Life, or
like candles that had been lighted in that inner chamber.

Leonard Abbott came out with flushed cheeks and bright eyes. "That
beautiful head against the pillows!" he said.

Charles Rand Kennedy, the playwright (author of The Terrible Meek)
said: "I was in the Presence of God."

I, myself, took Nancy Sholl in. When we left, she whispered to me:
"I could not have stood the vibrations in there one moment longer.
Power encircles that bed!"

__________

Alas, New York has now lost the great overhanging aura of the
Master. He is in Washington. But I am going there too, tomorrow,
to stay with my dear Mrs Elkins.

Washington

7 May 1912

Washington was beautiful, the banners of the spring floating out
everywhere. Trees along the street in full leaf. Flowering bushes
and tulip beds in the parks and in the grass plots in front of
houses. The Japanese cherry

[Photograph of 'Abdu'l-Baha in New York with His entourage, 1912]

trees behind the White House, a long row of coral-pink clouds.

The day I arrived, 23 April, I met the Master at luncheon at the
Persian Embassy, where Khan is now acting as minister.[104] The
table was strewn with rose petals, as the Master's table always is
in 'Akka, and Persian dishes were served.

A coloured man, Louis Gregory, was present and the Master gave a
wonderful talk on race prejudice which, however, I will not quote
here since it has been kept.[105] And besides, I am longing to
catch up with these days, when I am feeling with all my capacity
for feeling, when the gates of my heart are flung wide open and
fire sweeping through, burning up my heart, when I am seeing
through tears the Manifest Glory of the Beloved. I really don't
want to write about Washington. This heart was not awakened then.

But He said a lovely thing at Khan's table which I must keep. Mrs
Parsons was at the luncheon. Before she became a Baha'i she had
been a Christian Scientist, and now she brought up the question of
mental suggestion as a cure for physical disease. The Master
replied that some illnesses, such as consumption and insanity,
developed from spiritual causes--grief, for example--and that these
could be healed by the spirit. But Mrs Parsons persisted. Could not
extreme physical cases, like broken bones, also be healed by the
spirit?

A large bowl of salad had been placed before the Mas-

ter, Who sat at the head of the table, Florence Khanum[106] on His
right.

"If all the spirits in the air," He laughed, "were to congregate
together, they could not create a salad! Nevertheless, the spirit
of man is powerful. For the spirit of man can soar in the firmament
of knowledge, can discover realities, can confer life, can receive
the Divine Glad-Tidings. Is not this greater," and He laughed
again, "than making a salad?"

One more lovely thing. The servants were late bringing in the
dessert and Florence apologized; whereupon little Rahim, standing
beside her, spoke up.

"Even the King of Persia has to wait, doesn't He, mother?"

"Rahim dear," explained Florence, 'Abdu'l-Baha is King of the whole
world."

"Oh," said Rahim, very much abashed, "I forgot."

__________

After the luncheon, Florence and Khan held a large reception, to
which a number of very distinguished people came, among them Diya
Pasha, the Turkish Minister, and his whole family, Duke Lita and
his wife, Admiral Peary, and Alexander Graham Bell.

Between the end of lunch and this reception the Master went
upstairs to rest and to give a few private interviews. When He
reappeared among us, the two living rooms were already crowded. He
walked quickly to the open folding doors and standing there at the
centre, with a strikingly free and simple bearing, immediately
began to speak. His words too were simple and of a captivating
sweetness, a startling clarity.

[Photograph of 'Abdu'l-Baha with the children of 'Ali Quli Khan]

Diya Pasha stood next to me, his eyes riveted on the Master. When
the Master had finished speaking, the old diplomat (who is a fierce
Muslim) turned to me. "This is irrefutable. This is pure logic,"
he said.

A few months before, at the request of his daughter-in-law, an
American girl and a dear friend of mine, I had given Diya Pasha the
Message. I had had to give it in French, as he doesn't understand
English, and, my French being rusty by now, I'm afraid I didn't do
it very well: he looked so sceptical, almost contemptuous the whole
time I was speaking. But when I said that through the Baha'i
Teaching I had become a Muslim, and convinced him of this by the
reverent way I spoke of Muhammad, I really touched Diya Pasha. He
rose from the table, where we were at lunch, left the room, and
returned with a precious and very old volume of the Qur'an on
illuminated parchment and with a hand-tooled cover. "No Christian
eye but yours," he said, "has ever looked upon this."

__________

To return to the Persian Embassy. A delicious thing happened when
the Master greeted Peary, who has just succeeded in publicly
disgracing Captain Cook and proving himself, and not Captain Cook,
the discoverer of the North Pole. At that moment, in the Embassy,
he looked like a blown-up balloon.

I was standing beside the Master when Khan brought the Admiral over
and introduced him.

The Master spoke charmingly to him and congratulated him on his
discovery. Then, with the utmost sweetness, added these surprising
words: For a very long time the world had been much concerned about
the North Pole, where it was and what was to be found

there. Now he, Admiral Peary, had discovered it and that nothing
was to found there; and so, in forever relieving the public mind,
he had rendered a great service.

I shall never forget Peary's nonplussed face. The balloon
collapsed!

__________

Immediately after the Khan's reception, Mrs Parsons too had a large
one for the Master, to which Diya Pasha came with Him. I saw them,
to my great delight, enter the hall together hand in hand.

Mrs Parsons house has real distinction. It is Georgian in style and
in it has a very long white ballroom with, at one end, an unusually
high mantel--the mantel, as well as the ceiling and panelled walls,
delicately carved with garlands. At the windows hang thin silk
curtains the colour of jonquil leaves.

Here, after this first reception, the Master spoke daily in the
afternoon and the whole fashionable world flocked to hear Him.
Scientists too, and even politicians came!

In front of the mantel, a platform had been placed for the Master
and every day it was banked with fresh roses, American Beauties.

Into this room of conventional elegance, packed with conventional
people, imagine the Master striding with His free step: walking
first to one of the many windows and, while He looked out into the
light, talking with His matchless ease to the people. Turning from
the window, striding back and forth with a step so vibrant it shook
you. Piercing our souls with those strange eyes, uplifting them,
glory streaming upon them. Talking, talking, moving to and fro
incessantly. Pushing back His turban, revealing that Christ-like
forehead; pushing it forward again almost down to His eyebrows,
which gave Him a

peculiar majesty. Charging, filling the room with magnetic
currents, with a mysterious energy. Once He burst in, a child on
His shoulder. For a moment He held her, caressing her. Then He sat
her down among the roses.

__________

On Thursday, 25 April, the Master dined at the Turkish Embassy and
I was privileged to be there.

Never have I seen such a beautiful table. Hundreds of roses lay the
whole length of it, piled, melting into each other, sweeping up
from the head and the foot of the table to a great mound in the
centre, where the Master sat, faced by Diya Pasha. Florence Khanum
and Carey, Madame Diya Bey (Diya Pasha's daughter-in-law), the
American wives of Oriental diplomats, were placed on either side
of the Master and I sat next to Carey.

There are times when the Master looks colossal, when His Holiness
shines like the sun. That night He wore the usual white, with a
honey-coloured 'aba. Diya Pasha, opposite Him, watched Him with
eyes full of tears, his keen old hawk's face strangely softened.

The Master gave a great address on the civilizations built on the
basic Teachings of the Prophets; then He spoke of this dinner as
"a wonderful occasion". "The East and the West," He said, "are met
in perfect love tonight." There was something so poignant in His
words, so flame-creating, that for a moment I was overcome.

Later He spoke of the deep significance of the international
marriages represented there: Diya Bey's and Carey's, 'Ali-Quli
Khan's and Florence's. Carey made me very happy by saying: "Juliet
told me long ago of Your Teachings, when I was only fifteen years
old." What fruit that seed had borne, sown in a child!

[Photograph: 'Abdu'l-Baha with the Persian Consul-general for New
York and his household, Morristown, New Jersey.]

Diya Pasha made a thrilling speech. Rising and turning a lover's
face to the Master, he called Him "the Light of the world, the
Unique One of the age, Who had come to spread His glory and
perfection amongst us."

"I am not worthy of this," said the Master, very simply. Always a
great power is released from the Master's divine humility.

As I bade Diya Pasha goodnight, looking at me through a mist of
tears, he said: "Truly, He is a Saint."

__________

One day Mrs Elkins invited the Master to drive with us and we went
to the Soldiers' Home. The Elkinses, because of Katharine's
engagement to the Duke of the Abruzzi, have been terribly hounded
by the newspapers, but this happened before the Master came. He
couldn't have known about it through any outward means. Yet no
sooner were we seated in the car than He said to Mrs Elkins: "How
the newspapers here persecute one!"

It was such a sympathetic subject! At once Mrs Elkins opened her
heart.

"Come away!" smiled the Master. "Elude these journalists! Come to
Haifa where there is peace. Juliet will tell you there is peace in
Haifa."

Then He spoke of how much I loved her and of her philanthropic
deeds, which He prayed might increase. He captured her hand and
kept it in His, while she hastily hid the sweet gesture under her
cape.

"Nothing endures, Mrs Elkins," He said. "Nothing but the Love of
God endures. Look at these trees in full blossom now." And in words
which I will not try to repeat He described the turning of the
seasons: the trees in summer flourishing green leaves; the
inevitable autumn with the leaves lying, yellow, on the ground.

"This," He said, "is a symbol of human life."

"Remember Babylon." He drew a vivid picture of ancient Babylon, its
towers, its stupendous art; then of Babylon today: a waste of
rubble, "the hyena prowling among its crumbled stones." No other
sign of life but the "voice of the owl by night" or "a lark singing
at daybreak." "Remember Tyre. Here too was beauty and splendour and
pomp. Think of Tyre now. I have been there. I have seen."

He spoke of my mother that day: "Juliet's mother is very good. Her
heart is very pure. As soon as we met, her face became radiant."

When we reached home, Mrs Elkins said to me: "You can't hide a
thing from Him. He sees everything that is in your heart."

The day Mrs Elkins first met the Master she mentioned her husband,
the senator,[107] who died about a year ago. "I wish he were here
now," she said, "to meet You."

"Insha'llah," replied the Master, "for his good deeds I shall meet
him in the Kingdom of God."

One of the senator's good deeds had been to protect the Baha'is in
'Akka and Haifa while the Master was being tried for His life in
1907.

__________

I was so thankful to be in Washington. At those daily meetings in
Mrs Parsons' house I would see many of my old friends, friends of
my childhood. Mrs Elkins went with me every day to the meetings:
sometimes, when all the chairs were taken, standing the whole
afternoon, although she was far from well.

One day, however, she was not with me. That night she was giving
a small diner and an opera party and she

had to rest for this. So, being free for an hour or so, I decided
to stay at Mrs Parsons' and have a little visit with Edna.

While Edna and I were talking, the Master suddenly entered the
room. "I am going out for a drive," He said, "but wait till I
return, Edna, and you too, Juliet, wait. I will see you in a short
time."

So I waited--waited and waited. Half-past six came. Seven. We were
to dine at half-past seven and the Elkinses' house was a long way
off, rather indirect on the car-line.

"Go, Juliet," urged Edna. "I will explain."

But how could I? My Lord had told me to stay.

And now I shall have to digress and tell what may seem, just at
first, another story: When I was ten years old, (and I remember the
time because that year we were living with my grandmother) a very
presumptuous idea took possession of me. I began to dream of some
day painting the Christ. I even prayed that I might. "O God," I
would pray, "You know Christ didn't look like a woman, the way all
the pictures of Him look. Please let me paint Him when I grow up
as the King of Men." And I never lost hope of this till I saw the
Master. Then I knew that no one could paint the Christ. Could the
sun with the whole universe full of its radiations, or endless
flashes of lightning be captured in paint?

Imagine my surprise and dismay, fear, joy and gratitude all mixed
together, at the news given me by Mrs Gibbons when the Master first
came to New York. The night before He landed she had received a
Tablet in which He said: "On My arrival in America Miss Juliet
Thompson shall paint a wonderful portrait of Me." This was in
response to a supplication from Mrs Gibbons

asking that her daughter might paint Him, which she never did,
though the Master graciously gave her permission, even more
graciously adding those words about me.

It was a little after seven when the Master came back from His
drive. Entering the room in which He had left me and where of
course I was still waiting, He said: "Ah, Juliet! For your sake I
returned. Mrs Hemmick[108] wanted to keep Me, but I had asked you
to wait; therefore I returned." After a pause He added: "Would you
like to come up and paint Me tomorrow?"

So I learned the reward of obedience. Such a reward for so small
an act of obedience! Once in Haifa He said to me: "Keep My words,
obey My commands and you will marvel at the results."

And, by a miracle, I wasn't late for dinner! The dinner, because
of another guest, had been postponed a half hour.

The next morning I went very early to Mrs Parsons' house, taking
my box of pastels; but though it was only eight o'clock, quite a
crowd had already gathered and I felt that the morning was doomed
to be a broken one. Not only that, but the light in the rooms
upstairs, where I was supposed to paint, is very weak, and the
delicate wallpaper, with tiny bunches of flowers all over it, I
couldn't use as a background for His head. For a while I was in
despair, for I dared not make the suggestion I had in mind. But in
the end I did. Begging Him to forgive me if I were doing something
wrong, I asked if He would pose in New York instead. To this he
consented so freely and sweetly that I had no more qualms about it.

The following day I went to Mrs Parsons' to meet Lee McClung, the
Treasurer of the United States. Lee McClung had been one of the
idols of my early adolescence. He had seemed quite old to me then,
though now he is only thirty-eight. When I saw him again last
winter for the first time in about ten years, he had made all sorts
of fun of me for my "conversion to Bahaism". "It made me laugh out
of one eye and cry out of the other," he said. "What does your
mother think about it? Have you converted her?"

But at Mrs Parsons' first meeting, to my great surprise, there he
was in the audience! I couldn't wait to speak to him or to present
him to the Master as Mrs Elkins was in a hurry that day, but in the
evening he dined with us.

"How did you feel when you saw the Master?" I asked him.

A shy look came into his face, and Mr McClung is anything but shy.
"Well, I felt as though I were in the presence of one of the great
old Prophets: Elijah, Isaiah, Moses. No, it was more than that!
Christ ... no, now I have it. He seemed to me my Divine Father."

Then he said he must leave us a little early, as he was going to
Mr Bell's--Alexander Graham Bell's--to meet 'Abdu'l-Baha there.

Later I was told that the Master had made an address at Mr Bell's;
then others were called on to speak. But when Lee McClung was
called on he said: "After 'Abdu'l-Baha has spoken, I cannot."

At Mr McClung's request, I had made an appointment for him with the
Master for a private interview and this was the reason I was here
to meet him at Mrs Parsons'. I arrived a little ahead of time and
while I was

waiting for Mr McClung, a door in the hall opened and there stood
the Master, beckoning to me. He was alone, so we had to fall back
on His English and my scant Persian.

"How is your mother?" He asked first. "How old is she?"

But I couldn't tell Him, Mamma having always concealed her age till
I think even she doesn't know it now.

"About fifty?"

"I think so."

"How old are you?"

I confessed my age.

"In My eyes you are fifteen," He replied, so sweetly.

"In our eyes I am an infant?"

"Yes. Baby!"

Then the translator arrived.

"Tell Juliet," the Master began at once, "that she teaches well.
I have met many people who have been affected by you, Juliet. You
are not eloquent, you are not fluent, but your heart teaches. You
speak with a feeling, an emotion which makes people ask: 'What is
this she has?' Then they inquire; they seek and find. It is so too
with Lua. You never find Lua speaking with dry eyes! You will be
confirmed. A great bounty will descend upon you. You will become
eloquent. Your tongue will be loosed. Teach, always teach. The
confirmations of the Holy Spirit descend upon those who teach
constantly. Never feel fear. The Holy Spirit will give you the
words to say. Never fear You will grow stronger and stronger."

That erect head, that hand held high in command, the Power that
eddied from Him as He spoke those words, how can I ever feel fear
again when I have to mount the dreaded platform?

It was later that He said to me: "You have many friends. You have
no enemies. Everybody is your friend. Do not think I am ignorant
of conditions in New York. Both factions are pleased with you,
Juliet, and have nothing but good to say of you, although they
complain of others. Miss X is pleased with you! Mrs XX is pleased
with you!" (laughing as He mentioned the two chief disturbers of
the peace). "And you have accomplished this only through your
sincerity. Others may do this through diplomatic action, but you
have done it with your heart."

__________

(Footnote. I am destroying my diary in longhand and I can't bear
to lose any of the Master's words to me, those dear words of
encouragement. That is why I keep them.)

__________

Just then Lee McClung arrived and the Master took him
upstairs.[109]

__________

New York

11 May 1912

On Saturday, 11 May, just one month from the day of His landing,
the Master returned to New York from Washington, Cleveland, and
Chicago.

A few of us gathered in His rooms to prepare them for Him and fill
them with flowers; then to wait for His arrival: May Maxwell, Lua
Getsinger, Carrie Kinney, Kate Ives, Grace Robarts, and I. Mr Mills
and Mr Woodcock were waiting too.

The Master has a new home, in the Hudson Apartment House,[110]
overlooking the river. His flat is on one of the top stories, so
that its windows frame the sky. Now the windows were all open and
a fresh breeze blew in.

[Photograph: 'Abdu'l-Baha with children and Persian entourage.]

About five o'clock He came. Oh the coming of that Presence! If only
I could convey to the future the mighty commotion of it! The hearts
almost suffocate with joy, the eyes burn with tears at the stir of
that step! It is futile to try to express it. Sometimes when the
sun breaks through clouds and spreads a great fiery glow, I get
something of that feeling.

After greeting us all the Master took a seat by the window and
began to talk to us, with supreme love and gladness, wittily,
tenderly, eloquently, carrying us up as if on wings to the apex of
sublime feeling, so that we wept; then turning our tears to sudden
little ripples of laughter as an unexpected gleam of wit flashed
out; then melting our hearts with His yearning affection.

He had been horrified in Washington by the prejudice against the
Negroes. "What does it matter," He asked, "if the skin of a man is
black, white, yellow, pink, or green? In this respect the animals
show more intelligence than man. Black sheep and white sheep, white
doves and blue do not quarrel because of difference of colour."

Lua, May, and I, for the first time together in the Glory of His
Presence, sat on the floor in a corner, gazing through tears at Him
and whenever we could wrench our eyes from the sorrowful beauty of
His face, silhouetted against the sky, gazing at one another, still
through tears.

Day after day I was with Him there. Lua and I had permission to be
always with Him. I would go to His apartment in the early morning
and stay through the whole day and again and again He would call
me to His Presence.

"My Lord," I said once, "I really shouldn't take Your time. I don't
want to take Your time. I am only too

thankful to be here, serving at a distance, somewhere in Your
atmosphere."

"I know you are content with whatever I do, therefore I send for
you, Juliet," He replied.

13 May 1912

On the thirteenth of May (Percy Grant's birthday) a meeting of the
Peace Conference took place at the Hotel Astor. It was an enormous
meeting with thousands present. The Master was the Guest of Honour
and the first speaker, Dr Grant and Rabbi Wise the other speakers.

The Master sat at the centre on the high stage, Dr Grant on His
right, Rabbi Wise on His left. Oh, the symbolism of that: the
Jewish rabbi, the Christian clergyman, with the Centre of the
Covenant between, on the platform of the World Peace
Conference.[111]

The Master was really too ill to have gone to this Conference. He
had been in bed all morning, suffering from complete exhaustion,
and had a high temperature. I was with Him all morning. While I was
sitting beside Him I asked: "Must You go to the Hotel Astor when
You are so ill?"

"I work by the confirmations of the Holy Spirit," He answered. "I
do not work by hygienic laws. If I did," He laughed, "I would get
nothing done."

After that meeting, the wonderful record of which has been kept,
the Master shook hands with the whole audience, with every one of
those thousands of people!

14 May 1912

On Friday, the fourteenth of May, I had quite a distinguished
visitor, Khan Bahadur Allah-Bakhsh, the Governor of Lahore. Mr
Barakatu'llah had sent him to see me. I invited him to my meeting
that night and he

came and seemed to fall in love with the Teachings. The next
morning early he called on the Master at the Hudson Apartment
House. Lua, May, and I were there at the time and I told him that
May was one of my spiritual mothers and Lua my spiritual
grandmother. Whereupon the old gentleman said that in that case I
was his mother, May Maxwell his grandmother, and Lua his
great-grandmother!

Very soon the Master sent for him and kept him a long time in His
room. When the interview was over and Khan Bahadur Allah-Bakhsh had
left, the Master called me to Him.

"You teach well, Juliet," He said. "You teach with ecstasy. You
ignite the souls. A great bounty will descend upon you. I have
perfect confidence in you as a teacher. Your heart is pure,
absolutely pure."

My heart absolutely pure! I wept.

Then, for the second time, the Master gave me a picture of Himself.

Three days later I had a note from the Governor of Lahore. In it
he said: "'Abdu'l-Baha is the Divine Light of today."

__________

One night I took Marjorie to the Master. She had in her hand an
offering of tulips, grown in her own garden, and these He
distributed among His visitors.

"Juliet's love for you is divine," He said, speaking to Marjorie,
"and your love for each other must become so great that no stab
will affect it." Then He told us that, in reality, our friendship
was an "eternal" one.

Marion deKay went with me to Him.

"Your friend, Juliet? Ancient friend?" and He smiled at the child.
"You must become a flame of love." ("Like Juliet," He said. I have
to keep all His sweet words to

me.) "You must become as steadfast as a rock, firm! strong! so that
when the storms break over you, when the thunder roars and the
winds rage, you will not be shaken. You must become a teacher, a
speaker."

On the fifteenth of May the Master went away for a few days. As
soon as He returned Lua telephoned me. "The Master says: come up
now if you wish. If not, you have permission to come to Him at any
time and to stay as long as you are able. Only, don't displease
your mother. He wants her to be happy, He says. This is His
message, Julie."

19 May 1912

On Sunday, 19 May, He spoke at the Church of the Divine
Paternity.[112] This was unbearably beautiful. The church is
Byzantine, making me think of the worship of the early Christians.
The interior is of grey stone.

Oh the look of His that day! Then, more vividly than ever, He shone
as the Good Shepherd, returned at last to His flocks. I wept
through the whole service. At the end of the pew in front of me sat
Lua, her eyes fixed on the master, rapt, adoring, her beauty
immeasurably heightened by that recognition, that adoration.

Soon I caught a glimpse of another rapt face--a man's--my old
friend, Mr Bailey's. Mr Bailey is the last person I could have
hoped to see there. A very old gentleman, he had always seemed to
me a hopelessly unconvertible atheist. At least he would never
listen to a word from me about the Cause. And now, here he sat, and
never have I seen a face more touched. His eyes were wistful, like
a child's, shyly reverent and as limpid as though there were tears
in them.

He met me that afternoon at the Master's apartment,

making his entrance with these words: "I have been thinking since
this morning that the way to the attainment of greatness is through
elimination."

"You felt," I ventured, "'Abdu'l-Baha's simplicity?"

"One would naturally feel,"--huffily--"the simplicity of Niagara."

"And the beauty of His Face?"

"The patriarchal grandeur of His face cannot be denied."

Later, how his eyes hung on that Face while the Master talked with
him!

21 May 1912

On 21 May, Mrs Tatum[113] had a reception for the Master. The
people who were there were of the fashionable world, with a
sprinkling of artists and writers. Mrs Sheridan was pouring tea.

Mrs Tatum's house is beautiful. The impression you get is of space
and light. A white staircase winds up through a very wide hall,
from which, on each side, rooms open--living rooms, dining room,
library. All these were soon crowded.

The first friend I caught sight of was Louis Potter.[114] He

came running up to me, exclaiming: "Oh august Juliet!" and attached
himself at once to Lua and me. Suddenly, there was a stir among the
people, and 'Abdu'l-Baha was in our midst. He walked over to a
yellow couch which curved along the big half-moon of the bay window
and sat down on it.

I think I must tell you how He looked there. His surroundings were
all white and yellow. Sunlight streamed in. The shadows on His face
were transparent; His profile, against the blue sky through the
polished glass of the windowpane, outlined in light.

"Come, Louis," I said to Louis Potter, "let's go to the Master."

Louis had never seen Him before, but he skipped forward like a
buoyant faun, his head tipped to one side, his hands outstretched.

"Ah-h-h!" he said. It was a little cry from his soul, as though he
were just coming home, and was so glad.

And the Master too said: "Ah-h-h!" His arms wide open, welcoming
Louis home.

Percy Grant arrived. As soon as he appeared, big and imposing, in
the room, the Master rose almost eagerly, smiling and holding out
His hand.

"Ah! Dr Grant!" He said.

They stood for what seemed to me minutes, their hands clasped,
Percy, with beautiful deference, bowing his head, a gentle, almost
tender look on his face. One of the Persians translated the
Master's greeting to him but spoke so low that I could not catch
the words. Then Percy sat down on the curving window seat so that
he faced the Master.

Soon there was another stir in the room. A small, rather plain
middle-aged woman with the most astonishing eyes--very clear, very
violet--stood in the

doorway, almost timidly, and the Master at once sent Dr Farid to
her to ask her to come and sit by Him. This was Sarah Graham
Mulhall.

He spoke a few words to her and she rose and went out, returning
after some time with a tray and a pot of tea and two cups on it.
The tray was placed on a stool between the Master and Miss Mulhall
and they drank their tea together.

__________

(Footnote. 1947. Miss Mulhall's father and brother, who were
physicians, had come to New York from England to study the effects
of drugs on the body and mind. Both died mysteriously. Miss
Mulhall's only training had been in music. She was a very gentle,
retiring woman and knew nothing of the ways of business or
organization or medicine, or anything that would have equipped her
for the evidently dangerous work of her father and brother. But
something inside her, against which she fought, urged her to
continue it. She was in the midst of this inward conflict when Mrs
Tatum telephoned her and asked her to come to meet the Master. At
first Miss Mulhall declined, saying that she really couldn't go
anywhere, she was too absorbed in her own problems, she couldn't
face a crowd of people. But later she thought: Perhaps 'Abdu'l-Baha
is a Prophet, as Mrs Tatum believes,[115] and He might help me in
making my decision.

The Master, when He called her to Him in Mrs Tatum's house, asked
if she would do something for Him. Would she brew some tea for Him
with her own

hands and drink it with Him? And while they drank tea and talked,
He Himself brought up her problem.

He told her she must do the work she had in mind; she would rise
very high in it and become "a great Counsellor"; God would always
protect her and all the Celestial Beings of the Supreme Concourse
would rally to her assistance.

She did become a Great Counsellor. After years of wonderful work,
Governor Smith, Al Smith, made her Adviser and First Commissioner
of Narcotics for New York State. One night she herself led a raid
against one of the chief centres of the drug ring--a ring of very
rich, prominent men, some of them "pillars" of St. Patrick's, some
"pillars" of St. John's Cathedral. Rounding them up in their
centre, an apartment on Park Avenue, she, with the help of her
squad of police, locked them in; then telephoned to the governor.
He took the next train to New York and upheld Miss Mulhall's
determination to bring them all to trial. Then he went to Cardinal
Hayes and Bishop Manning. Cardinal Hayes said: "These men are the
worst type of criminals. I agree with you that they must be
punished." Bishop Manning said: "You can't touch my parishioners.
They are the builders of St. John's Cathedral." He threatened Miss
Mulhall. "If you ruin them, I will destroy your office." Which he
did, ultimately, for of course every one of the men was found
guilty and sent to Fort Leavenworth. After Lehman was elected
Governor, the Narcotics Commission was abolished. But in the
meantime Miss Mulhall had done a tremendous work. Her book, Opium,
the Demon Flower, has become world famous.)

__________

Then I caught sight of little "Fergie". His real name I don't want
to mention because of what I am going to

tell. He is a noted newspaper man who writes visionary books on
economics. Percy Grant calls him "my prophet". His face is pale
and pinched and suffering and he wears a thick chestnut wig. I went
up to him and asked: "Wouldn't you like to meet the Master?" "I
think not," he drawled, "I really have nothing to say to Him."

And now the Master began to speak to the whole roomful of people.

He was very happy, He said, to be with us. "Think of the contrast!"
For years He had been imprisoned in a fortress, His associates
criminals. Now He found Himself in spacious homes, "associating,"
He said, "with you."

His talk gradually shaped itself to some definite point, which,
however, He kept for the very end. I wondered what could be coming.
When it came it was like a thunderclap.

"Think of it," He said. "Two kings were dethroned in order that I
might be freed. This is naught but pure destiny."

I glanced at Percy Grant and saw that he was deeply stirred. He had
been listening, still with that tender deference, his head slightly
tipped to one side, but at these last startling words of the
Master's, in a flash the placidity of his face broke up, something
burned through and his eyes sparked.

"And now," ended the Master, suddenly rising to His feet, strong
and incredibly majestic, "you here in America must work with Me for
the peace of the world and the oneness of mankind."

And with this He left us, the room seeming strangely empty after
He had gone.

The next morning early Howard MacNutt came to see me, looking so
radiant that I knew he was bringing good news. Then he told me. He
had just had breakfast with

Dr Grant, and the Master was to speak again at the Church of the
Ascension--at the People's Forum this time, the night of 2 June.
Bishop Burch had severely reprimanded Percy for inviting the Master
to speak on 14 April and for seating Him in the Bishop's chair! But
an idiotic thing like that would never stop Percy Grant--only make
him more defiant.

He had talked very freely with Mr MacNutt about 'Abdu'l-Baha and
His address of the day before with its great climax. "As I
listened," he said, "I realized profoundly that this was a historic
moment; that before me sat One Who, imprisoned for the sake of
humankind, had been freed by the Power of God alone, through the
dethroning of two kings."

Return to New York

On 22 May the Master left for Boston, returning the twenty-sixth.
After His return He stayed with the Kinneys a day or so (till He
moved to His new house), and then came my test! For two days He
never even looked at me. My heart bled and burned. I could not
endure the withdrawal of His nearness. The third day I went to the
new house--309 West Seventy-Eighth Street--and there, in Lua's
arms, I sobbed my heart out.

"I cry," I said, "only because I love Him," (which I fear was not
exactly true) "because I have just realized how terrifically I love
Him. This love burns my heart. It is beyond endurance."

Then He sent for me to come to Him.

__________

With tears rolling down my cheeks I entered His Presence. He was
sitting on a couch writing and did not look up--still didn't look
at me! But at last He said, going straight to the point, piercing
to the real cause of my trouble: "I have not seen you lately,
Juliet, because of

the multitude of the affairs. But I have not forgotten My promise
to pose for you. Come on Saturday with your materials and I will
sit."

I thanked Him; then falling on my knees, begged Him not to banish
me from His Presence. I could not endure to be separated from Him.
I loved, loved Him.

He rose, stood above me, took my hand and held it a long, long
time. I still knelt at His feet, the hem of His garment pressed to
my lips.

Lua joined her sweet voice to mine.

"Julie has had so much trouble this year. She wants to stay close
to You now so that her heart may be healed."

"I want to stay close because I love You!"

He smiled and said something about another love.

"That is gone. Gone," I cried.

At these words of mine which I thought were true, the strangest
thing happened. Always when the Master holds my hand I feel a flow
of sparks from His palm to mine. Now this current of Life was
suddenly cut off. Could I have lied to my Lord, and so, by
unconscious self-deception, disconnected myself from the
Fountainhead of pure Truth?

But His answer was merciful, reminding me of past sincerities. "I
am pleased with you, Juliet. You are so truthful. You tell me
everything. She said:" (He turned, laughing, to Lua) "'This is my
heart. What can I do with it?'"

I laughed too, through my tears. But soon I began to cry again.

He went back to the couch and sat down and Lua and I followed Him
and knelt together at His feet there.

"Don't cry!" (I wish the whole world could hear the

Master say "don't cry". Tears would soon cease to be.) "Don't cry!
Unhappiness and the love of Baha'u'llah cannot exist in the same
heart, for the love of Baha'u'llah is happiness."

"I cry for love of you, my Lord. My tears come from my heart. I
can't help it."

"Your eyes and Lua's"--and He laughed again--"are two rivers of
tears." "I love Juliet," He added, "for her truthfulness."

"I told Juliet," said Lua, putting her arms around me, as we still
knelt together side by side, "of Your words to Mrs Kaufman: that
these human loves were like waves of the sea rolling to the shore
one behind the other, each wave receding."

"Balih," (yes) said the Master, "this is true. You will not find
faithfulness in humanity. All humanity is unfaithful. Only God is
faithful. Baha'u'llah spent fifty years in prison for the sake of
humanity. There was faithfulness!"

"From this moment," cried Lua, "Juliet and I dedicate our lives to
Thee and we beg to at last die in Thy Path--to drink the cup of
martyrdom. Oh, it would be so good for the Cause if two Americans
could do this! Take hold of His coat, Julie, and beseech."

I touched the hem of His garment.

"Say yes," implored Lua. "Oh Julie, beg Him to say yes."

But in Thonon I had told the Master that I would not ask for that
cup again but would wait till God found me ready for it.

"I accept the dedication of your lives now. The rest will be
decided later."

And it was clear what He meant. How we must amuse Him!

__________

I must go back a little. On Sunday, 26 May, the night of the
Master's return from Boston, He spoke at Mr Ramsdell's (Baptist)
church.[116]

My friend, Lawrence White, who lives in Utica, had come to New York
to met the Master, and he, Silvia Gannett, and I went together to
the church.

We entered, to see a breathtaking picture: That church suggests an
old Jewish synagogue. Behind the chancel is a sweeping arch from
which hangs a dark, massive curtain in folds straight as organ
pipes. The chancel was empty that night except for the Master,
sitting--almost lying--in a semicircular chair, His head thrown
back, His luminous eyes uprolled. The sleeves of His
bronze-coloured 'aba branched out from His shoulders like great
spread wings, hiding His hands, so that I was conscious only of His
head and those terribly alive eyes. There was an awful mystery
about that dominance of the head. It seemed to obliterate the human
form and reveal Him as the Face of God. The curtain behind Him
might have concealed the Ark of the Covenant, which He, THE
COVENANT, was guarding.

Later, when He rose to speak, the Manifestation of the Glory was
entirely different. He diffused a softer radiance.

"Look at Him and see the Christ," whispered Lawrence White.

__________

Next, He spoke at the Church of the Open Door. Again the Shepherd.
Again I watched Him through blinding tears.

2 June 1912

On the second of June He spoke for Dr Grant's Forum.[117] And there
He was simpler; He manifested less, or perhaps I should say
manifested something different: a sort of brotherhood to the
masses, still retaining His grandeur. And how He addressed Himself
to that meeting and to the heart of Percy Grant!

The subject was: "What can the Orient bring to the Occident?"

That subject in that church!

Lua and I were in a front pew with Valiyu'llah Khan and Mirza
Mahmud. Suddenly I was petrified to see Mason Remey coming in,
through the door of the vestry-room. When he was last in the Church
of the Ascension I was siting beside him, engaged to him, while
Percy thundered at me from the pulpit. The text of the sermon that
Sunday was the same as the text today: "What can the Orient bring
to the Occident." "Nothing but disease and death," said Percy, his
eyes on me, "and God wants us to live; He wants us to live."

But the Speaker this time was the Master. He said: "The Orient
brings to the Occident the Manifestations of God."

Then He defined the Church as that Collective Centre which,
attracting many diverse elements, united them

into one ordered system, adding that the Church was but a
reflection of the real Collective Centre, the Shepherd, Who,
whenever His sheep became scattered, reappeared to unite them. So
the Church, established by God's Manifestation, was the Law of God,
and when Christ said to Peter, "On thee will I build My Church,"
He meant He would build His Law upon Peter. Upon him Christ built
the Law of God by which all peoples and creeds were afterward
unified.

The Master had said it again to Percy Grant: "Be thou like Peter,"
for this was His message sent by me last summer.

When, at the end of the marvellous address, Percy stepped out into
the chancel, it was another man I saw: a man touched by the Hand
of God, shaken to the very roots of his being. As Marjorie said,
he looked ill and strangely upset. He could scarcely articulate.

The questions followed; it is the custom of the Forum to ask
questions. In the centre of the chancel sat the Master, Dr Grant
on His right in a choirstall, Dr Farid behind Him. How at home the
Master looked there! He pushed back His turban and smiled as He
answered, often very wittily. Once He raised one finger high. I
caught my breath then. He was like Jesus in the synagogue
confronting the scribes and Pharisees, except that His audience
weren't Pharisees.

5 June 1912

The Master has begun to pose for me. He had said: "Can you paint
Me in a half hour?"

"A half hour, my Lord?" I stammered, appalled. I can never finish
a head in less than two weeks.

"Well, I will give you three half hours. You mustn't waste My time,
Juliet."

He told me to come to Him Saturday morning, 1 June, at
seven-thirty.

I went in a panic. He was waiting for me in the entrance hall, a
small space in the English basement where the light--not much of
it--comes from the south. In fact I found myself faced with every
kind of handicap. I always paint standing, but now I was obliged
to sit, jammed so close to the window (because of the lack of
distance between the Master and me) that I couldn't even lean back.
No light. No room. And I had brought a canvas for a life-size head.

The Master was seated in a dark corner, His black 'aba melting into
the background; and again I saw Him as the Face of God, and
quailed. How could I paint the Face of God?

"I want you," He said, "to paint My Servitude to God."

"Oh my Lord," I cried, "only the Holy Spirit could paint Your
Servitude to God. No human hand could do it. Pray for me, or I am
lost. I implore You, inspire me."

"I will pray," He answered, "and as you are doing this only for the
sake of God, you will be inspired."

And then an amazing thing happened. All fear fell away from me and
it was as though Someone Else saw through my eyes, worked through
my hand.

All the points, all the planes in that matchless Face were so clear
to me that my hand couldn't put them down quickly enough, couldn't
keep pace with the clarity of my vision. I painted in ecstasy, free
as I had never been before.

At the end of the half hour the foundation of the head was perfect.

On Monday again I went to the Master at seven-thirty. As I got off
the bus at Seventy-Eighth Street and Riverside Drive I saw Him at
the centre of a little group standing beside that strip of park
that drops low to the river--the part we love to call "His garden",
a forever hallowed spot to us, for there we sometimes walk with Him
in the evenings, there He takes His daily exercise, or escapes from
the house to rest and pray.

The people who were with Him this morning were Nancy Sholl and Ruth
Berkeley, Mr MacNutt and Mr Mills, and, as I hurried to join them,
I saw that the Master was anointing them from a vial of attar of
rose.

Oh the heavenly perfume, the pale, early-morning sunshine and the
Master, all in white glistening in it (no one else takes the
sunlight as He does: He is like a polished mirror to the sun), the
ecstatic, intoxicating love with which He rubbed our foreheads with
His strong fingers dripping with that essence of a hundred roses!

Soon we saw Miss Buckton crossing the street toward us, bringing
with her a tall young man with a remarkable face, very pure and
serene, which seemed somehow familiar to me. The Master abruptly
left us and met the two in the middle of the Drive. Then I saw Him
open His arms wide and clasp the young man to His breast.

We all followed the Master to His house, where the young man was
introduced to me, and then I knew why his face had seemed familiar.
He was Walter Hempden. I had seen him in the theatre. I was in the
audience, he on the stage playing the part of "the Servant" in The
Servant in the House: Christ. And he played it so intensely, with
such spiritual fervour, that I prayed with all my

[Photograph of 'Abdu'l-Baha in His "garden" on Riverside Drive in
New York, 1912.]

heart, there in the audience, that he might some day meet the real
"Servant!"118

12 June 1912

Yesterday morning I went up early to the Master's house, that house
whose door is open at seven-thirty and kept wide open till
midnight.

He had been away and I had not seen Him for three days. I had
brought my pastels, thinking He might sit for me, but I found Him
looking utterly spent. He was in the English basement, Ruth
Berkeley and Valiyu'llah Khan with Him, lying back against the sofa
cushions. But, in spite of His weariness, He looked up with
brilliant eyes.

"What do you want of Us, Juliet?" He smiled.

I had hid my pastels. "Only to be near You."

"You must excuse Me from sitting for you today. I am not able
today."

"I knew that, my Lord, as soon as I came in."

Then He talked to Ruth and me. He told us we were as babes nursing
at the Divine Breast. "But babes," He said, "grow daily through the
mother's milk."

I could not help but weep, for His was the Divine Breast.

Soon He went out alone to "the garden", leaving Ruth, Valiyu'llah
Khan, and me together.

"It is wonderful," Ruth said as He went, "to see how the world is
quickened today in all directions."

"And to know," I said, "that the Voice that is quickening it is the
same tender Voice that spoke to us just now." And I wept again, for
something about the Master that morning had utterly melted me.

Later He came back. The English basement was crowded by then and
He talked for a long while to the people. But this I could see was
pure sacrifice. His vitality seemed gone. At times He could
scarcely bring forth the words, yet He gave and gave. When He had
finished He hurriedly left the house and went again to "His
garden".

On the way to the bus I met Him returning alone. He stopped me, put
out His hand and took mine, with indescribable tenderness smiling
at me. In the handclasp, the look, even in the tilt of the head was
a Love so poignant as to give me pain.

"Come tomorrow and paint, Juliet," He said.

He appeared refreshed--better--but remembering His utter depletion
of the morning I couldn't help answering, "If You are well." Then
I thought I would speak in Persian to amuse Him, but instead of
saying, "If Your health is good," I made a mistake and said, "Agar
Shuma khub ast," (If You are good.) whereupon I was covered with
confusion. I must have amused Him!

How stupidly we speak to Him! Imagine saying "if" to Him. That was
even worse than my break in Persian.

__________

That night there was a meeting at the Kinneys', one of those deadly
"Board meetings", but the Master came to it.

Striding up and down like a king, He spoke to us. In these
meetings, He said, we should be in connection

with the Supreme Concourse. Between the Supreme Concourse and us
there should be telegraphic communication, one end of the wire in
the breast of each one here and the other in that Concourse on
high, so that all we might say or do would be inspired.

__________

Today (12 June) I went up early to His house, but not early enough.
As I turned into Seventy-Eighth Street from West End Avenue I saw
Him a block away, hastening toward "His garden", His robes floating
out as He walked.

Soon He came back to us. Miss Buckton had arrived by that time and
a poor little waif of a girl, a Jewess. She was all in black and
her small pale face was very careworn.

I had been in the kitchen with Lua. When I heard the voice of the
Master I hurried into the hall, and there I saw them sitting at the
window, the poor sad little girl at the Master's right, Alice
Buckton at His left. Like a God, He dominated the scene. Sunlight
streamed through the window, His white robes and turban shining in
it, the strong carving of His Face thrown into high relief by
masses of shadow.

The little Jewish girl was crying.

"Don't grieve now, don't grieve," He said. He was very, very still
and I think He was calming her.

"But my brother has been in prison for three years, and it wasn't
just to put him in prison. It wasn't his fault, what he did. He was
weak and other people led him. He has to serve four more years. My
father and mother are always depressed. My brother-in-law has just
died, and he was the on who supported us. Now we haven't even
that."

"You must trust in God," said the Master.

"But the more I trust the worse things become!" she sobbed.

"You have never trusted."

"But my mother is all the time reading psalms. She doesn't deserve
to have God abandon her. I read the psalms myself, the ninety-first
psalm and the twenty-third psalm, every night before I go to bed.
I pray too."

"To pray is not to read psalms. To pray is to trust in God and to
be submissive in all things to Him. Be submissive; then things will
change for you. Put your parents and your brother in God's hands.
Love God's Will. Strong ships are not conquered by the sea, they
ride the waves! Now be a strong ship, not a battered one."

At noon I took Percy Grant to the Master. The Master had inquired
for him and sent him a message by me, and Percy had responded
instantly by himself suggesting this visit. But the Master was out
when we reached the house and while we were waiting for Him I
mentioned a very interesting thing He had said to Gifford
Pinchot:[119] that the people were rising wave upon wave, like a
great tide, and the capitalists, unless they realized this soon,
would be driven out with violence; also, that in the future the
labourer would not work on a wage basis but for an interest in the
concern.

Just then Lua appeared at the door of the room opposite, went to
the stairway and, with her beautiful reverence, leaned across the
rail to look down.

"He is coming, Lua?"

"Yes, Julie, He is coming!"

He entered the room with both hands extended and in

a voice like a chime from His heart, said: "Oh-h, Dr Grant! Dr
Grant!"

Then I slipped out.

When I returned at the Master's call, He was signing a photograph
for Percy and writing a prayer on it. "And now," he said,
presenting it, "you must give Me your photograph. I want your face.
I have given you Mine. Now you must give Me yours."

"I will pray for you," He added as He bade Percy goodbye. "I will
mention you daily in My prayers."

The Master detained me for a moment. As I rejoined Percy in the
car, Valiyu'llah Khan was just going into the house.

"Do you see that handsome, distinguished-looking young man?" I
said. "That is Valiyu'llah Khan, a descendant of two generations
of martyrs and the brother of one very young martyr. His
grandfather, Sulayman Khan, was a disciple of the Bab. He was
Governor of Fars and a great prince, but that didn't save him. He
suffered the most ghastly kind of martyrdom and with such ecstasy
that he is one of the best beloved of the Babi martyrs.

"Just a few years ago Valiyu'llah's father, Varqa Khan, and his
little brother, [Ruhu'llah] Varqa, went on a pilgrimage to 'Akka
and had a wonderful visit with the Master. But on their way home
they were both arrested and thrown into prison. Then one day some
brutal men came into their cell, one with an axe. Varqa Khan was
hacked into pieces alive, and the poor little boy forced to look
on at that butchery. When it was over, one of the executioners
turned to the child. I think I will tell the rest in Valiyu'llah
Khan's own language, just as he told it to me.

"'The man said to my brother: "If you will deny Baha'u'llah, we
will take you to the court of the Shah and honours and riches will
be heaped upon you." But my brother answered: "I do not want such
things." Then the man said to him: "If you refuse to deny, we will
kill you worse than your father." "You may kill me a thousand times
worse," my brother said. "Is my life of more value than my
father's? To die for Baha'u'llah is my supreme desire." 'This so
angered the executioners that they fell upon Varqa and choked him
to death.' Varqa was only twelve years old.

"A day or two ago," I went on, "Valiyu'llah Khan asked me, 'How is
the Master's portrait progressing?' and he added that, in a
portrait, he thought 'one must paint the soul.' 'But who can paint
the soul of 'Abdu'l-Baha I asked. And I wish you could have seen
the fire in his eyes as he drew himself up and said: 'We can paint
it with our blood!'"

13 June 1912

The next day, 13 June, as usual I went very early to the Master's
house--so early that no one was there--I mean, no visitors. Some
of the Persians of course were with Him: Valiy'u'llah Khan, Ahmad
and Mirza 'Ali-Akbar. I found them in the lower hall, the English
basement. The Master was sitting in the big chair by the window.
He called me to a seat opposite, then began to speak, smiling.

"Juliet is absolutely truthful. For this I love her very much. She
conceals nothing from me."

"It would be useless, my Lord," I said, "to try to conceal anything
from You. I could hide nothing."

"That is true," said the Master, raising one hand. "Nothing;
nothing."

Soon He rose. "Stay here," He told me, and went out with Ahmad.

By the time He returned a crowd had gathered. He gave a few private
interviews upstairs, then came down and, sitting by the window,
talked to all the people. I think the strongest image in my mind
is and will always be the holy figure of the Master sitting in the
rays of the sun at that window.

The meeting over, a few of us went upstairs to say a healing prayer
for Mrs Hinkle-Smith, but just before Lua began to chant, the
Master looked in at the door and called: "Juliet," and I happily
deserted Mrs Hinkle-Smith.

"Bring your things in here and paint," He said, pointing to the
library.

Oh, these sittings: so wonderful, yet so humanly difficult! We move
from room to room, from one kind of light to another. The Master
has given me three half hours, each time in a different room, and
each time people come in and watch me. But the miraculous thing is
that nothing makes any difference. The minute I begin to work the
same rapture takes possession of me. Someone Else looks through my
eyes and sees clearly; Someone Else works through my hand with a
sort of furious precision.

On this thirteenth of June, after Lua had chanted the prayer for
Mrs Hinkle-Smith, she and May came into the library, crossed over
to where I was sitting and stood behind me.

The Master looked up and smiled at May. "You have a kind heart, Mrs
Maxwell." Then He turned to Lua. "You, Lua, have a tender heart.
And what kind of heart

have you, Juliet?" He laughed. "What kind of a heart have you?"

"Oh, what kind of heart have I? You know, my Lord. I don't know."

"An emotional heart." He laughed again and rolled His hands one
round the other in a sort of tempestuous gesture. "You will have
a boiling heart, Juliet. Now," He continued, "if these three hearts
were united into one heart--kind, tender and emotional--what a
great heart that would be!"

14 June 1912

The next morning, Thursday, though I went unusually early to the
Master, He had already left the house. But Lua, Valiyu'llah Khan,
and I had a wonderful morning. Valiyu'llah told us so many things.

"My father," he said, "spent much time with the Blessed Beauty. The
Blessed Beauty Himself taught him.

"One time when my father was in His room, Baha'u'llah rose and
strode back and forth till the very walls seemed to shake. And He
told my father that once in an age the Mighty God sent a Soul to
earth endowed with the power of the Great Ether, and that such a
Soul had all power and was able to do anything. 'Even this walk of
Mine' said Baha'u'llah, 'has an effect in the world.'

"Then He said that His Holiness Jesus Christ had also come with the
power of the Great Ether, but the haughty priesthood of His day
thought of Him as a poor, unlettered youth and believed that if
they should crucify Him, His Teachings would soon be forgotten.
Therefore they did crucify Him. But because His Holiness Jesus
possessed the power of the Great Ether, He could not remain

underground. This ethereal power rose and conquered the whole
earth. 'And now,' the Blessed Beauty said, 'look to the Master, for
this same Power is His.'

"Baha'u'llah," added Valiyu'llah Khan, "taught my father much about
Áqa. Áqa (the Master, you know) is one of the titles of
'Abdu'l-Baha and the Greatest Branch is another, and the Greatest
Mystery of God another. By all these we call Him in Persian. The
Blessed Perfection, Baha'u'llah, revealed the Station of
'Abdu'l-Baha to my father. And my father wrote many poems to the
Master, though the Master would scold him and say: 'You must not
write such things to Me.' But the heart of my father could not keep
quiet. This is one poem he wrote:

__________

'O Dawning-Point of the Beauty of God, I know Thee! Though Thou
shroudest Thyself in a thousand veils, I know Thee! Though Thou
shouldst assume the tatters of a beggar, still would I know Thee!'

__________

In the late afternoon I returned with my mother. The Master
received us in His own room, which was full of roses and lilies and
carnations.

"Ah-h! Mrs Thompson. Marhaba! Marhaba!" (Welcome! Welcome!)

The intonation of that "Marhaba" can never be described. It is a
welcome from a heart which is a channel for God's heart.

He was very playful with Mamma. "Are you pleased

with Juliet? Pleased now, Mrs Thompson? The next time you have to
complain of her, come and complain to Me and I will beat her!"

15 June 1912

On Friday, 15 June, I was with the Master alone for a while, and
I brought up the name of Percy Grant. "He didn't understand You the
other day, my Lord. He thinks that You teach asceticism, that the
spirit and the flesh are two separate things."

"That is not what I said," the Master replied. "I said that the
spiritual man and the materialist were two different beings. The
spirit is in the flesh."

5 July 1912

The Beloved Master's portrait is finished. He sat for me six times,
but I really did it in the three half hours He had promised me; for
the sixth time, when He posed in His own room on the top floor, I
didn't put on a single stroke. I was looking at the portrait
wondering what I could find to do, when He suddenly rose from his
chair and said: "It is finished." The fifth time He sat, Miss
Souley-Campbell came in with a drawing she had done from a
photograph to ask if He would sign it for her and if she might add
a few touches from life. This meant that He had to change His pose,
so of course I couldn't paint that day. And the fourth time (the
nineteenth of June)--who could have painted then?

I had just begun to work, Lua in the room sitting on a couch
nearby, when the Master smiled at me; then turning to Lua said in
Persian: "This makes me sleepy. What shall I do?"

[Photograph: Portrait of 'Abdu'l-Baha painted by Juliet Thompson,
1912.]

"Tell the Master, Lua, that if He would like to take a nap, I can
work while He sleeps."

But I found that I could not. What I saw then was too sacred, too
formidable. He sat still as a statue, His eyes closed, infinite
peace on that chiselled face, a God-like calm and grandeur in His
erect head.

Suddenly, with a great flash like lightning He opened His eyes and
the room seemed to rock like a ship in a storm with the Power
released. The Master was blazing. "The veils of glory", "the
thousand veils", had shrivelled away in that Flame and we were
exposed to the Glory itself.

Lua and I sat shaking and sobbing.

Then He spoke to Lua. I caught the words, "Munadiy-i 'Ahd." (Herald
of the Covenant.

Lua started forward, her hand to her breast.

"Man?" (I?) she exclaimed.

"Call one of the Persians. You must understand this."

Never shall I forget that moment, the flashing eyes of 'Abdu'l-Baha
the reverberations of His Voice, the Power that still rocked the
room. God of lightning and thunder! I thought.

"I appoint you, Lua, the Herald of the Covenant. And I AM THE
COVENANT, appointed by Baha'u'llah. And no one can refute His Word.
This is the Testament of Baha'u'llah. You will find it in the Holy
Book of Aqdas. Go forth and proclaim, 'This is THE COVENANT OF GOD
in your midst.'"

A great joy had lifted Lua up. Her eyes were full of light. She
looked like a winged angel. "Oh recreate me," she cried, "that I
may do this work for Thee!"

By now I was sobbing uncontrollably.

"Julie too," said Lua, not even in such a moment forgetful of me,
"wants to be recreated."

But the Master had shrouded Himself with His veils again, the
"thousand veils". He sat before us now in His dear humanity: very,
very human, very simple.

"Don't cry, Juliet," He said. "This is no time for tears. Through
tears you cannot see to paint."

I tried hard to hold back my tears and to work, but painting that
day was at an end for me.

The Master smiled lovingly.

"Juliet is one of My favourites because she speaks the truth to me.
See how I love the truth, Juliet. You spoke one word of truth to
Me and see how I have praised it!"

I looked up to smile in answer, and in gratitude, then was
overwhelmed again by that awful convulsive sobbing.

At this the Master began to laugh and, as He laughed and laughed,
the strangest thing happened. It was as if at each outburst He
wrapped Himself in more veils, so that now He looked completely
human, without a trace left of His superhuman majesty. Never had
I seen Him like this before and I never did afterward.

"I am going to tell you something funny," He said, adding in
English, "a joke".

"Oh tell it!" we begged; and now I was in a sort of hysteria,
laughing and crying at the same time.

"No. Not now. Paint."

But of course I couldn't paint.

Later, walking up and down, He laughed again.

"I am thinking of My joke," He explained.

"Tell it!" we pleaded.

"No, I cannot, for every time I try to tell it I laugh so I cannot
speak."

We got down on our knees, able at last to enter into His play, and
begged Him, "Please, please tell us." We were laughing on our
knees.

"No. Not now. After lunch."

But, alas, after lunch He went upstairs to His room, and we never
heard the Master's joke.

Perhaps, there wasn't any joke. Perhaps He had just found it
necessary, after that mighty Declaration, to bring us down to earth
again. He had revealed to us "The Apex of Immortality." He had
lifted us to a height from which we could see it. Now He, our
loving Shepherd, had carried us in His own arms back to our little
valley and put us where we belonged.

__________

In the early morning of 19 June, before the Master had called me
to paint Him, He had spoken to the people in the English basement.
On His way down the stairs from His room He passed Lua and me,
where we stood in the third-floor hall. We saw, and felt, as He
walked down the upper flight, a peculiar power in His step--as
though some terrific Force had possession of Him; a Force too
strong to be caged in the body, sparking through, almost escaping
His body, able to sunder it. I cannot begin to describe that
indomitable step, its fearful majesty, or the strange flashing of
His eyes. The sublime language of the Old Testament, words such as
these: "Who is this that cometh from Bozrah ... that treadeth the
wine-press in His fury?" faintly express what I saw as I watched
the Master descending those stairs. Unsmiling, He passes Lua and
me. Then He looked back, still unsmiling.

"Juliet is one of My favourites," He said.

__________

In the afternoon of that same day He sent Lua down to the waiting
people to "proclaim the Covenant"; then a

little later followed her and spoke Himself on the station of the
Centre of the Covenant, but not as He had done to Lua and me. The
blazing Reality of it He had revealed in His own Person to us. To
them He spoke guardedly, even deleting afterwards from our notes
some of the things He had said.

Still later that afternoon the Master had promised to sit for a
photograph. I had made the appointment myself with Mrs Kasebier,
a very wonderful photographer, to bring the Master to her studio,
but some people prevented His getting off in time. When they left,
He sent for me.

"I am ashamed," He said (while I nearly died at that word "ashamed"
from Him), "but I will go tomorrow. I had planned to leave for
Montclair tomorrow but I will stay until Friday for your sake."

"I can't bear, my Lord," I said, "to have You delay Your trip to
the country for this."

"No, I wish it," He answered.

"I have a confession to make, my Lord," I said. "I have been to Dr
Grant's house. It happened in this way: he asked if I would be the
bearer of his photograph to You and would I stop at the Rectory for
it on my way up to You. Then he invited me to come to breakfast.
That invitation I declined, but I could think of no excuse for
refusing to stop for the picture. So I did go. But I stayed only
five or ten minutes and his mother was with us all the time."

"Good, good," said the Master. "Going to his house was not good,
but since you have confessed it, Juliet, I am very much pleased.
When I look into your heart," He added, smiling, "I find it just
like that mirror--it is so pure."

(Oh, please understand me, when I repeat such things it is only
because they are His words to me. I keep them just to remind myself
of something potential He sees in me which I must grow up to. I am
not reminding myself of His praise, for it really isn't praise but
stimulation. If He had been blaming me, I would repeat His blame
too.

He then spoke of my teaching. "Your breath is effective," He said.
"You are now in the Kingdom of Abha with Me, as I wished you to
be."

20 June 1912

The next day, 20 June, we went to Mrs Kasebier's--Lua, Mrs
Hinkle-Smith, and I--in the car with the Master.

I shall never forget the Master's beauty in the strange cold light
of her studio, a green, underwater sort of light, in which He
looked shining and chiselled, like the statue of a god. But the
pictures are dark shadows of Him.

21 June 1912

On 21 June, the Master left for Montclair to stay nine days. I was
with Him all day till He went. I had lunched with Him nearly every
day that week. Lua, Mrs Hinkle-Smith, Valiyu'llah Khan, and I bade
Him goodbye on the steps of His house. Montclair

23 June 1912

It had nearly killed Lua not to be taken to Montclair with Him. Two
days later she said to me: "Let's go to see Him, Julie."

"How can we, Lua? He didn't invite us," I answered. "He bade us
goodbye for nine days."

"Oh but you have an excuse, those proofs of Mrs Kasebier's
pictures. You really should show them to Him, Julie."

And she whirled Georgie Ralston and me off to Montclair with her.

We were punished of course, and our first punishment was that lunch
was unusually late (so that instead of arriving after, as we had
planned, we arrived just in time for it). And this was agonizing,
for there weren't enough seats at the table, and the Master
wouldn't sit down to eat. One of us had to occupy His chair, while
He Himself waited on us, carrying all the courses around and around
that table. I couldn't get over my mortification.

At the end He came in with the fruit, a glass bowl full of golden
peaches. Without turning His head--His face was set straight before
Him--He sent a piercing glance from the corner of His eye toward
Lua and me. Such a majestic, stern glance, like a sword-thrust.

After lunch, and this was our second punishment, He banished the
three of us--Georgie, Lua, and me--leading us to a small back porch
and abandoning us there. But before very long He returned and asked
us to take a walk with Him.

We came back from our walk by way of the front porch. Some people
were gathered there and Lua, Georgie, and I sat down with them
while the Master went upstairs to rest. He joined us, however, very
soon and, striding up and down, began to talk to us. As He walked
His Power shook us; His intoxicating exhilaration, pouring into me,
filled me up with new life.

His eyes--those eyes of light, which seem to be always looking into
heaven and when for an instant they glance toward earth, veer away
at once, back to heaven--were brilliantly restless. His whole Being
was restless with the same strange Force I had felt on that
memorable day, the nineteenth of June. It was as though

the lightning of His Spirit could scarcely endure to be harnessed
to the body. He was almost out of the body. But soon He took a seat
and rested quietly.

I showed Him the proofs of the pictures, then spoke of Mrs
Kasebier--who had seen Him only once, when she photographed Him.
"She said she would like to live near You, my Lord."

He laughed. "She doesn't want to live near Me. She only wants a
good time!" Then He grew serious. "To live near Me," He said, "one
must have My aims and objects. Do you remember the rich young man
who wanted to live near Christ, and when he learned what it cost
to live near Him--that it meant to give away all his possessions
and take up a cross and follow Christ--then," the Master laughed,
"he fled away!"[120]

"Among the disciples of the Bab," He continued, "were two: His
amanuensis and a firm believer. On the eve of the Bab's martyrdom
the firm believer prayed: 'Oh let me die with You!' The amanuensis
said: 'What shall I do?'

"'What shall I do?'" mocked the Master. "'What do you want me to
do?' The disciple died with the Bab, his head on the breast of the
Bab, and their bodies were mingled in death. The other died in
prison anyway, but think of the difference in their stations!

"There was another martyr," continued the Master after a moment,
"Mirza 'Abdu'llah of Shiraz." Then He told us that Mirza 'Abdu'llah
had been in the Presence of Baha'u'llah only once, "but he so loved
the Blessed Beauty" that he could not resist following Him to

Tihran, though Baha'u'llah had commanded him to remain in Shiraz
with his old parents. "Still," said the Master, His tone exultant,
"he followed!"

Mirza 'Abdu'llah reached Tihran in the midst of that bloodiest of
massacres resulting from the attempt on the Shah's life by two
fanatical Babis. Baha'u'llah had been cast into a dungeon. There,
in that foul cellar He sat, weighted down by "The Devil's Chain",
eleven disciples sitting with Him, bound by the same chain. In it
were set iron collars which were fastened around the neck by iron
pins. Every day a disciple was slaughtered and none knew when his
turn would come. The first intimation he had of his immediate death
was when the jailer took out the iron pin from his collar.

Mirza 'Abdu'llah entered Tihran and inquired of the guard at the
gate "where Baha'u'llah resided." "We will take you to Him," said
the guard. And some men took 'Abdu'llah to the dungeon and chained
him to Baha'u'llah.

"So," the Master said, "he found his Beloved again!"

One day the jailer came into the dungeon and took out the pin from
Mirza 'Abdu'llah's collar.

"Then," said the Master, "Mirza 'Abdu'llah stepped joyfully
forward. First, he kissed the feet of the Blessed Beauty, and then
..."

The Master's whole aspect suddenly changed. It was as though the
spirit of the martyr had entered into Him. With that God-like head
erect, snapping His fingers high in the air, beating out a
drum-like rhythm with His foot till we could hardly endure the
vibrations set up, He triumphantly sang "The Martyr's Song".

"I have come again, I have come again,

By way of Shiraz I have come again!

With the wine cup in My hand!

Such is the madness of Love!"

"And thus," ended 'Abdu'l-Baha, "singing and dancing he went to his
death, and a hundred executioners fell on him! And later his
parents came to Baha'u'llah, praising God that their son had given
his life in the Path of God."

This was what the Cause meant then. This was what it meant to "live
near Him"! Another realm opened to me, the realm of Divine Tragedy.

The Master sank back into His chair. Tears swelled in my eyes,
blurring everything. When they cleared I saw a still stranger look
on His face. His eyes were unmistakably fixed on the Invisible.
They were filled with delight and as brilliant as jewels. A smile
of exultation played on His lips. So low that it sounded like an
echo He hummed the Martyr's Song.

"See," He exclaimed, "the effect that the death of a martyr has in
the world. It has changed My condition." After a moment's silence,
He asked: "What is it, Juliet, you are pondering so deeply?"

"I was thinking, my Lord, of the look on Your face when You said
Your condition had been changed. And that I had seen a flash of the
joy of God when someone dies happily for His Cause."

"There was one name," the Master answered, "that always brought joy
to the face of Baha'u'llah. His expression would change at the
mention of it. That name was Mary of Magdala."

West Englewood

29 June 1912

Almost a week passed before we saw our Lord again. Then, on the
twenty-ninth of June, we met Him at West Englewood. He was giving
a feast for all the believers in the grounds around Roy Wilhelm's
house, the "Feast of Unity" He called it.

I went with dear Silvia Gannett. We walked from the little station,
past the grove where the tables were set--a grove of tall pine
trees--and on to the house in which He was, He Whose Presence
filled our eyes with light and without Whom our days had been very
dim and lifeless.

Ah, there He was again! Sitting in a corner of the porch! I sped
across the lawn, forgetting Silvia, forgetting everything. He
looked down at me with grave eyes, and I saw a fathomless welcome
in them.

For a while we sat with Him on the porch. Then He led us down into
the grove. There He seated Himself on the ground at the foot of a
pine tree and called two believers to His right and left. One was
Mrs Krug in her very elegant clothes, the other a poor and shabby
old woman. But both faces, the wrinkled one and the smooth, pretty
one, were beautiful with the same radiance. I shall never forget
that old woman's shining blue eyes.

The great words He spoke to us then have been preserved.[121] I
will not repeat them. Besides I remember them too imperfectly. But
He said one thing which woke my whole being: "This is a New Day;
a New Hour."

By the time He had finished, the feast was ready, but just as it
was announced a storm blew up--a strange, sudden storm, without
warning. There was a tremen-

dous crash of thunder; through the treetops we could see black
clouds boiling up, and big drops of rain splashed on the tables.

The Master rose calmly and, followed by the Persians, walked out
to the road, then to the end of it where there is a crossroad. A
single chair had been left there and, as I watched from a distance,
I saw the Master take it and sit down, while the Persians ranged
themselves behind Him. I saw Him lift His face to the sky. He had
gone a long way from the house; thunder still crashed and the
clouds rolled frighteningly low, but He continued to sit perfectly
motionless, that sacred, powerful face upturned to the sky. Then
came a strong, rushing wind; the clouds began to race away; blue
patches appeared above and the sun shone out. And then the Master
rose and walked back into the grove. This I witnessed.

Later, as we sat at the tables, two hundred and fifty of us, He
anointed us all with attar of rose. I was not at a table but
sitting under a tree with Marjorie Morten and Silvia. The Master
swept toward us in His long white robes, forever the Divine
Shepherd.

"Friends here?" He smiled, "Friends?"

In His voice was a thrilling joy. With a look that shook my heart,
so full was it with the musk of His Love, He rubbed my face hard
with the attar of rose.

He passed among all the tables with His little vial of perfume
(which Grace Robarts swears was almost as full at the end as in the
beginning) anointing the forehead of every one there, touching and
caressing all our blind faces with His tingling fingers.

Then He disappeared for hours.

__________

Lua, too, went off alone, an exceedingly naughty purpose in her
mind. The Master had just told her that she

must leave very soon for California. So now she deliberately walked
in poison ivy, walked back and forth and back and forth till her
feet were thoroughly poisoned. "Now, Julie," she said (when the
deed was done) "He can't send me to California."

__________

To me the most beautiful scene of all came later, when the Master
returned to us after dark. About fifty or sixty people had
lingered, unable to tear themselves from Him. The Master sat in a
chair on the top step of the porch, some of us surrounding
Him--dear guilty Lua with her poisoned feet, May, Silvia, Marjorie,
and I and a young coloured man, Neval Thomas. Below us, all over
the lawn, on each side of the path, sat the others, the light
summer skirts of the women spread out on the grass, tapers in their
hands (to keep off mosquitoes). In the dark, in their filmy
dresses, they looked like great moths and the burning tips of the
tapers they waved like fireflies darting about.

Then the Master spoke again to us. I was standing behind Him, close
to Him, and before He began He turned and gave me a long, profound
look. His talk of that night has been recorded. It was a resounding
Call to us to arise from the tomb of self in this Day of the Great
Resurrection and unite around Him to vivify the world.

Before He had finished He rose from His chair and started down the
path still talking, passing between the dim figures on the grass
with their lighted tapers, talking till He reached the road, where
He turned and we could no longer see Him. Even then His words
floated back to us--the liquid Persian, 'Ali Quli Khan's beautiful,
quivering translation, like the sound of a violin string.

"Peace be with you," this was the last we heard, "I will pray for
you."

Oh that Voice that came back out of His invisibility when He had
passed beyond our sight. May I always remember, and hear the Voice.
New York

30 June 1912

That night our Beloved Lord returned to New York. The next morning
early I flew up to see Him, but He sent me at once to Lua, who was
staying with Georgie Ralston in a hotel nearby.

She was in bed, her feet terribly swollen from the poison ivy.

"Look at me, Julie," she said. "Look at my feet. Oh, please go
right back to the Master and tell Him about them and say: 'How can
Lua travel now?'"

I did it, returned to the Master's house, found Him in His room and
put Lua's question to Him. He laughed, then crossed the room to a
table on which stood a bowl of fruit, and, selecting an apple and
a pomegranate, gave them to me.

"Take these to Lua," He said. "Tell her to eat them and she will
be cured. Spend the day with her, Juliet."

Oh precious Lua--strange mixture of disobedience and obedience--and
all from love! I shall never forget her, seizing first the apple,
then the pomegranate and gravely chewing them all the way through
till not even a pomegranate seed was left: thoroughly eating her
cure, which was certain to send her to California.

In the late afternoon we were happily surprised by a visit from the
Master Himself. He drew back the sheet and looked at Lua's feet,
which by that time were beautifully slim. Then He burst out
laughing.

"See," He said, "I have cured Lua with an apple and a pomegranate."

But Lua revolted again. There was one more thing she could try, and
she tried it. The Master had asked me to

paint her portrait and I had already had one sitting. The following
day, at the Master's house, she drew me aside.

"Please, Julie, do something else for me. Go to the Master, now,
and say: 'If Lua is in California, how can I paint her?'"

I went straight to His room with Valiyu'llah Khan to translate. "My
Lord," I said, "You have commanded me to paint Lua. If she is in
California and I here, how can I do it? The portrait is begun; how
can I finish it?"

Again the Master burst out laughing, for this of course was too
transparent.

"In a year," He said, "Lua will join Me in Egypt. She will stay in
New York a few days on her way to Me and you can paint her then,
Juliet."

So poor Lua had to go to California. There was no way out for
her.[122]

4 July 1912

On the fourth of July, yesterday, Mamma had her birthday dinner
with the Master. He was so sweet to her. When we first arrived we
found Him in the English basement and He led Mamma to the sofa and,
with that wonderful freedom of His, drew her down beside Him.

Carrie Kinney, Georgie Ralston, and I were sitting across the room
by the window and I'm afraid we did look solemn, for we sat in a
row, perfectly silent.

"Look at them!" said Mamma, laughing. "They are jealous of me!"

"Then we will make them more jealous!" arid the

Master seized Mamma's hand and drew her still closer, at which she
looked really scared!

Now I felt compelled to speak. "Three years ago, my Lord, on the
fourth of July, Carrie, and I were with You in 'Akka and You took
us to the Holy Shrine of Baha'u'llah. I never expected to keep that
anniversary with You in New York."

At the table the Master joked with Mamma because she was eating so
little. "I perceive that you are an angel, Mrs Thompson. Angels do
not eat."

"The Master sees I am not an angel," I laughed, "for I eat every
morsel He puts on my plate."

"I perceive that you are a very clever girl. Mrs Thompson," He
continued, "is going home to a luscious supper and saving her
appetite for that."

Passing me a dish with three very shrivelled dates on it, He said:
"Here, Juliet, are the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost."

And I ate them up!

A little later Mamma said, looking at the Master with her sweet
shyness: "You are very kind to me."

"God knows the degrees of it," He sighed deeply.

__________

While we sat with Him after dinner, He spoke of tests. "Even the
sword," He said, "is no test to the Persian believers. They are
given a chance to recant; they cry out instead: 'Ya Baha'u'l-Abha!'
Then the sword is raised,"--He shot up His arm as though
brandishing a sword--"they cry out all the more 'Ya Baha'u'l-Abha!'
But some of the people here are tested if I don't say 'How do you
do?'"

12 July 1912

I have almost no time to write these days, as I spend most of them
with the Beloved Master and when I try to write after dinner, my
darling little mother stops me too soon. Her room is at right
angles with mine and at ten o'clock she calls through her window:
"Put out your light, baby." But there are three or four lovely
things that I must tell.

On Monday, 9 July, the Master invited me, with the Persians to go
to the Natural History Museum. It was a broiling afternoon and I
couldn't imagine why He should want to go to that Museum, and in
the hottest part of the day. But wherever He went, there I wanted
to be.

When we reached the Ninth Avenue corner of the Museum the Master,
exhausted by that time, sank to a low stone ledge to rest. Between
us and the main door on the Central Park corner stretched a long
cross-town block in glaring sun, not a single tree on the sidewalk.

"My Lord," I said, "let me try to find a nearer entrance for You."
And I hurried along the grass, keeping close to the building,
searching the basement for a door. The employees' entrance was
locked. Just beyond stood a sign: "No Thoroughfare." I was rushing
past this when a shrill whistle stopped me, and I turned to face
the watchman of the grounds. He was a little bent old Jew with a
very kind face.

"Oh excuse me," I said, "for breaking the rules, but I must find
a nearer door than the main one. See Who is sitting on that ledge!
I must find it for Him."

The watchman turned and looked at the Master, look-

ed and looked, at that Figure from the East, from the Past--the
Days of the Old Testament--and his eyes became very soft. "Is He
a Jew?" he asked.

"A descendant of Abraham."

"Come with me," said the watchman. "Ask Him to come with me."

I went over and spoke to the Master and He rose and followed with
the Persians, I dropping back to walk with them. There was not a
nearer entrance, but the watchman, taking a risk perhaps, led us
across the grass, where at least it was cooler and the way shorter.

In the Museum we passed through a room in which a huge whale hung
from the ceiling. The Master looked up at it, laughed and said: "He
could hold seventy Jonahs!"

Then He took us straight to the Mexican exhibit, and this seemed
to interest Him very much. In the great elaborately carved glyphs
standing around the room He found traces of Persian art and pointed
them out to me. He told us this sculpture resembled very closely
the ancient sculpture of Egypt. "Only," He said, "this is better."
Then He took me over to the cases where He showed me purely Persian
bracelets.

"I have heard a tradition," I said, "that in the very distant past
this country and Asia were connected."

"Assuredly," answered the Master, "before a great catastrophe there
was such a connection between Asia and America."

After looking at everything in the Mexican rooms, He led us to the
front door and out into the grounds again. Then, stepping from the
stone walk to the grass, He seated Himself beneath a young birch
tree, His back to us, while we stood behind Him on the flags. He
sat there

a long time, silent. Was He waiting for someone? I wondered.

While He--waited?--the old Jewish watchman stole quietly up to me
from the direction of the Museum.

"Is He tired?" he whispered. "Who is He? He looks like such a great
man."

"He is 'Abdu'l-Baha of Persia," I said, "and He has been a great
Sufferer because of His work for the real Brotherhood of Man, the
uniting of all the races and nations."

"I should like to speak to Him," said the Jew. And I took him over
to the tree under which the Master still sat with His back to us.

At the sound of our footsteps He turned and looked up at the
watchman, His brilliant eyes full of sweetness. "Come and sit by
Me," He said.

"Thank You, Sir, but I am not allowed."

"Is it against the rules for Me to sit on the grass?"

The old man's eyes, softly shining, were fixed on the Master. "No,
You may sit there all day!"

But the Master rose and stood beneath the tree.

Such pictures as I see when the Master is in them could never be
put upon canvas--not even into words, except by the sublimest
poet--but I always want to try at least to leave a trace of their
beauty. The Master, luminous in the sunlight, His white robe
flowing to the grass, standing beside the white slender trunk of
the birch tree, with its leafy canopy over His head. The Jew
standing opposite Him--so bent, so old--his eyes, like a lover's,
humbly raised to the face of his own Messiah! As yet unrecognized,
his Messiah, yet his heart worshiped.

Eagerly he went on, offering all he could think of to this
Mysterious One Who had touched him so deeply.

"You didn't see the whole of the Museum. Would You like to go back
after You have rested? You didn't go up to the third floor."
(Unseen by us he must have been following all the time.) "The
fossils and the birds are up there. Wouldn't You like to see the
birds?"

The Master answered very gently, smiling.

"I am tired of travelling and looking at the things of this world.
I want to go above and travel and see in the spiritual worlds. What
do you think about that?" He asked suddenly, beaming on the old
watchman.

The watchman looked puzzled and scratched his head.

"Which would you rather posses," continued the Master, "the
material or the spiritual world?"

Still the old man pondered. At last he brought forth: "Well, I
guess the material. You know you have that, anyway."

"But you do not lose it when you have attained the spiritual world.
When you go upstairs in a house, you don't leave the house. The
lower floor is under you."

"Oh I see!" cried the watchman, his whole face lighting up, "I
see!"

After we parted from the watchman, who walked with us all the way
to the Ninth Avenue corner, leading us again across the grass, I
began to blame myself for not inviting him to the Master's house,
forgetting that the Master Himself had not done so. Every day I
meant to return to the Museum to tell the old man where the Master
lived, but I put off from day to day.

When, at the end of a week, I did run over to the Museum, I found
a young watchman there, who seemed to know nothing of the one he
had replaced.

Had our friend "gone upstairs?"

Why had the Master visited a Museum of Natural

History in the hottest hour of a blistering July day? Had He
instead visited a soul whose need was crying out to Him, to open
an old man's eyes so that he might see to climb the stairs, to take
away the dread of death?[123]

__________

On the tenth of July, I went to the Master in the early morning
with something in my heart to say, but already there were people
with Him and I saw no chance of talking privately.

"Come, Juliet, sit by Me," He called as I entered the room. "Now,
speak."

How could I, before those people? I hesitated.

"All your hopes and desires are destined to be fulfilled," He said,
"in the Kingdom of God."

This was my cue.

"I came to tell You, my Lord, that now I have only one desire, to
offer my heart for Your service."

"This you will also do, but all your desires will be fulfilled."

He kept me to lunch that day. While we were waiting in the English
basement for the lunch to be announced, Valiyu'llah Khan and I
alone with the Master, He spoke again of my "truthfulness".

"Oh," I prayed, "may I some day have all the virtues so that in
every way I can make you happy."

"But he who possesses truthfulness possesses all the virtues," said
the Master. Then He went on to tell us a story. "There was once a
disciple of Muhammad who

asked of another disciple, 'What shall I do to please God?' And the
other disciple replied: 'Do not kill. Do not steal. Do not covet,'
etc., etc., etc. A great many 'do nots'." the Master laughed. "He
asked still another, 'What shall I do to become nearer to God?' And
this one said: 'You must supplicate and pray. You must be generous.
You must be courageous,' etc., etc., etc. Then the disciple went
to 'Ali. 'What do you say I should do in order to please God and
to become nearer to Him?' 'One thing only: be truthful.'

"For," continued the Master, "if you are truthful, you cannot
commit murder. You would have to confess it! Neither can you steal.
You would have to confess it. So, if one is truthful, he possesses
all the virtues.

"I may tell you this," He said to me, and He told me a thing so
wonderful that, even to keep and cherish His words and read them
over in the time to come, I cannot repeat it here.

"My Lord," I said, "if ever I have told You an untruth it was
because I deceived myself."

"There are degrees of truth," He answered, "but that word of yours
which has so pleased Me was absolute, perfect, extraordinary
truth."

__________

That night we walked with Him in "His garden"--Georgie Ralston,
Mirza 'Ali Akbar, Valiyu'llah Khan, Ahmad, and I. Dear Lua, who has
not yet left for California, was ill and unable to be with us.

He led us down a path sloping to the river, flanked by tall
poplars. Sweeping on ahead in His gleaming white robes, He was like
a spirit. The night was very dark, the river and the Jersey
Palisades starred and glittering with lights and there were chains
of lights close to the water.

With a wave of the hand towards them He said: "If only the souls
of men could be thus illumined."

"It is You, my Lord," I said, as I followed close with Valiyu'llah
Khan and Ahmad, "Who put a torch to our souls and light them."

Suddenly out from behind the bushes rushed a crowd of children,
bursting upon us like little demons, capering around us and
hooting. Some of them even picked up stones and threw them. Then
they all began to sing: "Follow the Lord! The Lord leads on!"

Back to us floated the voice of the Master: "The people of the
world are blind. You must have vision. The people of the world are
heedless: see how heedless they are!" and He swept His hand toward
the children, who immediately melted back into the shadows as if
they had never really existed. "You must be aware. The people of
the world are steeped in darkness. You must be immersed in a sea
of light."

We went deep down in the park, close to the river; then turned,
climbed a path, and came out upon the street. Here there was a
stone wall, dividing the park from the sidewalk. The Master leaned
wearily on the wall and gazed far below to the river. He seemed to
be lost in meditation, His face profoundly sorrowful. I thought of
a picture, a poster, which, in the early days of His visit, had
been displayed on all the church doors: the Christ mourning over
the city.

Soon He continued His walk. I turned to Valiyu'llah Khan.

"Oh," I said, "if only I could realize throughout the whole fibre
of my being, feel with every nerve, every atom in me, His Divine
Reality, if only while in His bodily Presence I could be fully
aware of Who He is ..."

He turned and spoke and His face was ineffably gentle and holy and
something in His voice pierced me to the heart. He couldn't have
heard me with the outer ear--I had fallen too far behind and was
whispering, and in English--but how He answered me!

"They laugh at Me, yet My dress is the dress of Jesus, just the
same that He wore."

The people of the world: children! Had the Master Himself evoked
those little demons and made a sort of moving picture of them, to
show us what is to come as we "follow the Lord" in the dark night?

__________

But the very next day another picture, of very different children,
was superimposed upon this.

I had been with the Master all morning. (Later I will write of the
morning.) In the afternoon around three o'clock I returned with
Rhoda Nichols only to meet Him just going out with the Persians.
He smiled, then walked swiftly toward the river, but Ahmad,
dropping behind, called to Rhoda and me: "Come along with us to the
Harrises'." We should have known better than to go, for the Master
had not invited us, but we couldn't resist the temptation. So we
followed up Riverside Drive, then West End Avenue, till we came to
Ninety-Fifth Street, where Mr and Mrs Harris live. A tenement house
neighbourhood.

As we approached Ninety-Fifth Street, there we saw them: the
different children. There must have been nearly a hundred of them,
playing in the street with their hoops and balls. But, when the
Master drew near, all shining white in His long flowing robes, they
immediately stopped playing. It all happened instantaneously. The
next moment they had fallen into formation and were marching down
the street behind Him (we had

turned east toward Central Park), some of them still rolling their
hoops. Without one word they followed, their little faces almost
solemn. They made me think of a real and beautiful Children's
Crusade.

We came to the house where the Harrises live and walked up five
steep flights, but when Mrs Harris opened her apartment door and
Rhoda and I saw a table inside set only for the Master and the
Persians, we backed away terribly embarrassed and lost no time in
getting downstairs. After all, we couldn't have foreseen a luncheon
at three o'clock!

When we opened the street door, there were the children again,
surrounding the house, silently looking up at it. A little
yellow-haired girl came running up the stoop to me. She seemed to
be the spokesman for the others. Breathlessly she asked: "Please,
ma'am, tell us. Is He Christ?"

I sat down on the stoop while the whole crowd of children swarmed
and pushed around me. "I will tell you all about Him," I said. Then
I whispered to Rhoda: "Go upstairs again, dear, and let the Master
know what is happening."

She returned with a wonderful message from the Master, an
invitation to all the children to come to a feast to be given
specially for them at the Kinneys' house next Sunday.

__________

And now just a word about the morning. Georgie Ralston and Mrs
Brittingham, Lua, and I were together in the Master's room. As I
sat there I felt something of the Mystery of His Divinity. The day
was very hot and His sleeves were rolled up and I saw on His arms
the scars of chains.

When the others left He kept me.

"I come to Your Presence, my Lord," I said, "to be cured of my
spiritual ills."

"Your pure heart," the Master answered, "is a magnet for the Divine
feelings."

He spoke of my mother and sent her some fruit. "Your mother," He
said, "is very dear to me. You cannot imagine how I love your
mother."

Then He laughed and asked: "How is Dr Grant?"

"I don't know, my Lord. I haven't seen him. I'm afraid I hurt him
the last time we met."

"What did you do?"

"I refused to go into his house with him."

"How is he with Us?"

"I don't know."

"I want to see him. Is this possible?"

"Yes, I am sure. I will telephone to him."

"Tell him I am longing to see him, longing to see him," repeated
the Master smiling.

I knelt and kissed His robe, looking up so happy, so grateful,
while He looked down and laughed at me.

That night I telephoned to Percy. "I am the bearer of a message to
you," I said, "from the Master. He asked this morning if I had seen
you lately and said He wanted to see you. 'Tell Dr Grant I am
longing to see him,' He said."

"That was very beautiful of Him. Give Him my cordial greetings.
Tell him how happy I am that He thought of me. I can't tell you at
this moment, Juliet, when I can go. I hope tomorrow afternoon. I
have a wedding at half-past four. After that, perhaps."

"Well, I will give you the Master's telephone number and you can
call His house about it, unless you prefer to have me arrange it."

"I should rather do it through you."

Saying he would let me know in the morning, he bade me goodbye;
then, "I give you my loving salutations."

The next morning, however, when he called me up, he was in another
state of mind. "Tell the Master," he said, "I have so many human
engagements just now. I am going up to Greenwich after the wedding.
(Greenwich is Alice Flagler's home.) "But I want to run in to see
you this morning, if I may."

I went to my room and prayed. I was on my knees when he came. Not
that he found me on them!

"To come straight to the point, Percy," I said, "I hope you will
go to see the Master."

"I'm going to see the Master, only I can't today."

"Oh that is all right," I said, brightening. "I didn't understand."

We talked about other things and then Katherine Berwind dropped in.
Percy spent the morning with us, leaving us for a little while to
return with bottles of ginger ale and grape juice which he mixed
into a drink for us. When he finally left about noon I followed him
out of the studio.

"What message have you," I asked, "for the Master?"

He swore! It was a very mild swear, but he coupled the Master's
name with it, so I can't repeat it.

"I believe you love Him," he said fiercely, "more than anything on
earth."

"I do."

"More than your art," he added quickly.

"But of course."

"Well, you shouldn't. With your talent, Juliet, you could do
immortal work. Do you never think of that?"

"I am thinking of His immortal work in us."

"He has done it, in you!"

"Not yet."

"Juliet, I have wanted to co-operate with Him. You know that. But
I don't believe He can do this thing alone."

"I believe He is perfectly able to do it alone."

"You do?"

"He changes the hearts and nobody else can do that. Well, what
message shall I take to Him?"

"Tell Him with my greeting that I will come up some time to see
Him, but I am out of town a great deal, most of the time, and--"

"Can't you do any better than that?" I asked.

"I want to do something for His comfort and when Mr Flagler's yacht
comes back I want to take Him up the Hudson. I will be in town
Friday, Juliet."

"Then come up on Friday to see Him with me. Please come. You know
I don't often persist, but this time--forgive me if I do."

"I think it is beautiful of you to persist in this instance,
Juliet." With the face of a martyr he kissed my hand. "I will come
Friday."

And, looking unspeakably miserable, he left me.

__________

On Friday in the afternoon he stopped for me. We were expecting the
Master in the evening--He was to bless our house with a visit--and
at the moment Percy arrived I was telephoning Marjorie, who had
offered to bring some light refreshment. Percy, sitting in the
living room, heard. But I couldn't invite him, for I knew it would
spoil Mamma's evening with the Master--she mightn't even come into
the room.

While I was putting on my gloves Percy produced a large and ornate
pocketbook. "Juliet," he said, "here is an empty pocketbook which
someone brought me from Italy. Will you accept it? I thought you
might have in mind some Oriental person to whom you would like to
give it."

When we started out he proposed going up in a cab, but I objected
on the grounds that it would be slow and we were already half an
hour late.

"I am bringing the Master down here at six and you would have no
visit at all if we took a slow cab."

"Well, for the matter of that, Juliet"--and his upper lip grew very
stiff--"any visit I might pay would be merely an expression of
affection and courtesy. As for all you could get from a visit of
this sort, where conversation must be through an interpreter and
'Abdu'l-Baha will go off into a monologue on some subject that
interests Him--well, as I said, it is merely a mark of courtesy."

__________

I never saw his mouth so stubborn as when we entered the Master's
house. The Master was waiting for us, sitting in the bay window of
the English basement.

"Marhaba, Dr Grant! It is a long time since I have seen you, a long
time."

But His welcome was more reserved than it had been before.

"Well, Dr Grant," He said, after a moment, "what is the very latest
news, the very latest?"

Remembering Percy's remark, that the Master always indulged in
monologue, I couldn't help smiling at this.

"The latest news," said Percy with a wicked look, as

obstinate, pugnacious and self-confident as I have ever seen, "is
in the field of athletics."

"The Olympic games?" asked the Master.

"Yes," said Percy, surprised.

"You know," the Master went on, "that these games originated in
ancient Greece and it was a necessity of that time to develop the
body to its fullest strength, the nations being constantly at
warfare and the men wearing armour and fighting hand to hand. Heavy
swords had to be driven through coats of mail; bodies had to be
strengthened to endure the mail."

"But explain to the Master," said Percy, very much de haut en bas,
"that because of the people all centring in the cities and thus
depleting their constitutions, the necessity for physical
development is just as great now as it was then, though the basis
is different."

The Master answered with the utmost sweetness: "We do not deprecate
physical development, for the sound mind should work through a
sound body, but We think that the people of the West are too much
concerned with mere physical development. They forget the need of
spiritual development."

But Percy was bent upon argument. The development of the spirit,
he maintained, could not even begin till the body had first been
built up; and he looked so absurdly condescending, so pompous, so
sure of his power to defeat the Master, that I could scarcely
control my mirth. The Master did not control His.

"Man thinks too much of perfecting the body," He smiled
delightfully, "but of what use is it to him without the perfecting
of the spirit? No matter how much he develops his muscles and
sinews he will never

become as strong as the ox, as brave as the lion or as big as the
elephant! Physically he is an animal, yet inferior to the animals,
for animals acquire their sustenance with the greatest ease,
whereas man has to toil incessantly, to labour with infinite pain,
for a mere livelihood. So, in the physical realm, the beast is
nobler than man. But man is distinguished from the beast by his
spiritual gifts and these he should develop with the other, both
together. There should be the perfect balance, the spiritual and
the physical. A man whose ideal side only is developed is also
imperfect. We do not deprecate comfort. If I could find a better
house than this I would certainly move into it. But man should not
think of comfort alone."

I looked at Percy. He was still like a fighting-cock, ready for
another bout. He would never give in before me, I knew, so I
slipped quietly into the kitchen. When I returned the whole
atmosphere had changed. His face had softened, his stiff mouth
relaxed. As I entered the room the Master was saying: "When one
prays, one sometimes has divine glimpses. So, when one is
spiritually developed, a sublimity of nature is obtained, a
delicacy of vision such as could not otherwise be found. Not only
this, but tranquillity and happiness are secured.

"Do you think if it had not been for spiritual assurance I could
have been happy all those years in prison? Think of it, forty
years! You have just been telling me, Dr Grant, that forty years
is the average American life. I spent My American life in prison.
Yet all that time I was on the heights of happiness. Many believers
in Persia have been forced to give up

everything: their possessions, their families, and, in the end,
their lives, but they never lost their happiness.

"Remember Christ, when they placed the crown of thorns on His head.
At that very moment, as the thorns wounded His brow, He looked down
the vista of the centuries and beheld innumerable kings bowing
their jewelled crowns low before that crown of thorns. Do you think
He did not know, that He could not foresee?" (Again I stole a
glance at Percy. He looked utterly melted now and his eyes shone.)
"When they spat in the face of Christ," the Master went on, "when
they made a mock procession and carried Him around the streets, He
felt no humiliation."

Just then I rose to go, first asking permission, with my eyes, of
the Master, Percy was not inclined to go, even when we were on our
feet. In spite of that momentary softening--perhaps partly because
of it--he still wanted to stay and argue and I could hardly tear
him away.

While we were standing, he swung the master's divine subject to a
combative one, "the Occident versus the Orient": that was the
substance of it. And if ever I saw the Occident embodied, it was
at that moment in that man.

The Master leaned close to him and with the utmost gentleness and
patience tried to appeal to him. The people of the East, He said,
were content with less than the people here, so their hours of work
were shorter. He touched too on the absence of suicide in the
Orient.

When He spoke of suicide, and also while He described the
humiliations heaped on Christ, which could not humiliate Him, I had
a strange sense of impending tragedy for Percy Grant, of something
dreadful to happen

in the future in which he would utterly "lose his happiness" and
would feel humiliation, when perhaps these words of the Master
would come back to him.[124]

On the way down in the cab the Master talked about economics. "The
most important of the questions here," He said, "is the economic
question. Until that is first solved nothing can be done. But if
it should not be solved there will be riots."

Percy spoke of democracy.

"But your poor man," the Master replied, "cannot even think of
economics; he is so overburdened."

I asked Percy to tell about his work and when he had done so, with
some hesitation (for he seldom speaks of himself), the Master said
sweetly: "May you make peace here. May you unite the classes."

Whereupon Percy's face beamed.

But he steeled himself again and at my door he turned to go, though
I did invite him in, and the Master also said: "Are you not coming
in?"

"No, no," and he hurried away, with a huffy look.

I can still see the Master on my steps, so in command.

"Au revoir, Dr Grant," He said.

Percy had mentioned the yacht trip to the Master and asked if He
could make it the following Monday, but the

Master had several appointments Monday and could not accept for
that day.

"I will try," said Percy, "to get the yacht for Tuesday."

The Master had planned to spend the whole evening with us and we
were all to go for a walk, but the Persians had forgotten to
announce at the Seventy-Eighth Street house that He would be absent
Friday evening, so He felt He must return early.

__________

My Lord came into our house. The door was not locked. He opened it
Himself and walked up the stairs. It was His house. Mamma almost
ran to meet Him, her face suffused with joy, her eyes shy and
tender. The MacNutts and the Goodalls had arrived and Ruth Berkeley
and Marjorie, and were waiting in the second-floor living room. The
Master went in and greeted them with His wonderful buoyant
greeting; then I took Him to my room to rest and, after kneeling
and kissing the hem of His garment, left Him lying on my couch.

While He was resting Kahlil Gibran came. He had a private talk with
the Master in my room; then joined us upstairs in the studio, to
which we had all gone by that time, and in a very few minutes the
Master too joined us.

Mamma, with her own loving hands, had prepared the studio for His
reception and it was very beautiful, full of laurel, white roses,
and lighted white candles.

"What a good room," said the Master as He entered it. "It is like
an Oriental room--so high. If I were to build a house here," He
laughed, "I would build an eclectic house--partly Oriental, partly
Occidental."

Then we passed the refreshments and our Beloved Lord "broke bread"
with us.

__________

(Footnote. Of course I was terribly disappointed that the Master
stayed such a short time that night. A few days later I began to
see that this was no accident, that the changing of His plan for
that evening had not been just a result of the Persians'
forgetfulness, but that in it was a deep and subtle lesson for me.
A lesson in perception--or intuition--which is truth itself. I had
asked the Master whom I should invite to meet Him. "Anyone you
think of," He answered. "Whatever name comes into your mind, invite
that person." A few names came into my mind as if projected there
from outside. Percy Grant. At once I rejected that name, on Mamma's
account, as I have explained already. Mrs Krug. Oh no! Mamma wasn't
fond of Mrs Krug. Mrs Kaufman. No. Then I selected my personal
friends. Mrs Krug and Mrs Kaufman both were extremely hurt because
I didn't invite them and what harmony there was between us was
broken for the time being. As for Percy Grant ... !)

16 July 1912

Tuesday, 16 July, the day proposed for the yacht trip up the
Hudson, was a day of crushing disappointment. In the morning I
awoke thinking: Today great things may happen for Percy; miracles
may happen! Still, an instinct made me uneasy.

As soon as I reached the Master's house I asked if Dr Grant had
been heard from. No word had come, Dr Farid told me, and really the
Master ought to know in order to arrange His day's appointments.
"You had better telephone, Juliet."

I went to the corner drugstore and called the Rectory,

only to learn that Percy was still in Greenwich. I called him in
Greenwich.

"Oh, Juliet." He sounded bored. "I have been meaning to telephone
you all morning, but one thing after another has prevented. No, I
am sorry, tell 'Abdu'l-Baha how very sorry I am, but I cannot
arrange the trip for today. Mrs Flagler was in town yesterday and
it didn't agree with her and she isn't well enough to go today."

"I am very sorry," I murmured, so shocked I could scarcely speak.

"When does the Master leave New York?"

"On the twenty-second."

"On the twenty-second? I hope it can be arranged before them."

"I hope so."

"How did the supper go off the other night?"

"What supper?"

"The supper you had for the Master?"

"There was no supper."

"Why, I heard you talking about 'provisions' over the telephone
with Mrs Morten."

"That was only fruit and a cool drink. The Master just paid us a
visit. I asked you to come in."

"Well, I didn't feel that I could. I thought you were going to sit
around a table and that all those Persians you had asked would fill
it up, and that woman you invited at the Master's house. It makes
me shudder, Juliet, to think of all the money you spent that day."

"That was nothing."

"Oh, money is nothing, I suppose!"

"Certainly nothing compared with a visit from the Master." And I
said goodbye.

I went back to the house so ashamed I could hardly

hold up my head: miserably ashamed of Percy Grant, burning up with
indignation at his deliberate insult to the Master, to Him Whose
"dress was the same as the dress of Jesus", an insult levelled at
the Master, the real intention of which was to hurt me. Just a
petty revenge on me.

I gave Percy's wretched message to Dr Farid without any comment;
then stole off alone and wept.

Soon my Lord sent for me. I longed to unburden my heart to Him, but
Grace Krug and Louise were with Him and Grace was telling her own
troubles, speaking of some unhappiness of the day before, so of
course I could say nothing. I sat forcing back my tears, feeling
that at any moment I might burst out crying and that I mustn't do
that in His Presence for any other reason than love.

"And now," said the Master, still talking with Grace, "the sun is
out again! The sun is shining. I am glad of that. I do not like
clouds!"

Oh, what if I cry now, I thought.

"Winds from all directions: from the north, south, east, and
west--great hurricanes--have beaten against My Ark, yet My Ark
still floats." Smiling, He made an adorable gesture with His hands,
swinging them like a rocking boat. "One single wave has submerged
many a great ship, yet My Ark still floats!"

"Juliet," He said, turning suddenly to me, "is there anything you
want to ask Me privately? Biya! (Come)."

He led me by the hand into the back room.

"Now speak. Your eyes are all speech!"

"I only want to say that I am deeply ashamed for Dr Grant. Deeply
sorry. The friend to whose husband the yacht belongs is sick and
he could not get it for today."

"It is better so," said the Master. "I was wondering

how I could do it, for I am not very well today and must be in
Brooklyn this evening at eight o'clock. But I would have done it
for his sake. It is better; better," He ended, with a strange sweet
intonation, as He returned to the other room.

18 July 1912

Each day I drink deeper of the cup of Love. Yesterday the draught
I took was pure ecstasy. I saw Him for three brief moments only,
but those three moments were charged.

First, I saw Him with a few others--Mrs Helen Goodall, Miss Wise,
Ella Goodall Cooper--and He spoke to us of the kindness of God,
holding in His hand my rosary, which He has carried for several
days (the one Khanum gave me in Haifa). When we meet kindness in
a human being He said, how happy it makes us. How much happier we
will be when we realize the kindness of God.

Later He called to Him alone. I met Him as He came downstairs from
His room to the library. He was all in white.

"Ah-h, Juliet," He said. He began to walk up and down the library.
"Your mother sent me these things," (referring to some flowers and
another little present). "These things came from your mother? I
became very happy from them, but she should not have taken the
trouble."

"It made her so happy to send that little offering."

"But she should not have taken the trouble." He continued to walk
up and down. In a moment He said: "I am very much please with your
truthfulness, Juliet.

That matter between us, your truthfulness on that occasion makes
Me happy whenever I think of it."

"Everything in my heart is for You to see, my Lord. I only hope the
day may come when You will see nothing in it except the Love of
God."

He came very close and looked deep into my eyes with His brilliant
eyes.

"I see your heart," He said. "I look into your face and your heart
is perfectly clear to Me."

Again He paced up and down and it was then I knelt.

"Tell the Master," I said to Valiyu'llah Khan, "I pray that my
heart may become entirely detached from this world."

"Your heart," said the Master, pausing before me and gazing at me
with a face of glistening light, "will become entirely detached.
You are now in the condition I desired for you." He walked to the
window and stood, looking out. "I wish you to teach constantly.
Therein lies your happiness, and My happiness."

He came back to me. I had risen.

"I wish you to be detached from the entire world of existence; to
turn to the Kingdom of Abha with a pure heart; with a pure breath
to teach the people. I desire for you," He continued, resuming His
walk, "that which I desire for My own daughters, Tuba and Ruha."

With this He dismissed me.

__________

In the evening I returned to a wedding, Grace Robarts' and Harlan
Ober's, where the Master, for me, as well as for the bride and
bridegroom, turned the water of life into wine.

Grace and Harlan stood together, transfigured; they

seemed to be bathed in white light. Mr Ives, standing opposite,
married them. Back in the shadow sat the Master. There were times
when I, sitting at a little distance from Him, felt His lightning
glance on me. At the end of the service He blessed the marriage.
After this He went upstairs, to the front room on the third floor.

I soon followed him there, taking with me our coloured maid, Mamie,
and her little adopted son, George, a child six years old. Mamie
wanted to have the Master bless him.

On the way up in the bus I had (idiotically) asked: "Do you know
who the Master is, George?"

"No, ma'am," very positively.

"Well, you will know some day, for by the time you grow up the
whole world will know Who the Master is and then you will be so
proud and happy to remember that He blessed you."

The blessing the Master gave George was not an obvious one, there
was nothing ceremonial about it. He just took the child on His knee
and talked playfully with him and caressed him. But how it
impressed that little boy!

While we were going downtown in the bus, he rolled his big eyes up
at me and out of a dead silence said: "I know now, ma'am."

And when Mamie's husband, Cornelius, opened the door for us, George
rushed to him, crying out: "The Master blessed me, dearie, and I
will show you just how."

Then he clattered down the basement stairs and I was spared the
scene! I never did know how George demonstrated it--he couldn't
have taken Cornelius on

his knee!--but the next day Mamie told me of something else.

"Dearie," George had asked, "is the Master that blessed me this
evening the same Master that holds the moon in His hand and makes
the sun shine?"

"Go to bed, child," said Cornelius.

"But," repeated George, "is the Master that same Lord that makes
the sun shine and the rain come down?"

"The Lord that makes the sun shine," said Mamie, "is in the Master
that blessed you this evening, George. It was the Holy Spirit that
blessed you."

__________

(Footnote. 1947. Thirteen years later a handsome young man came to
my door. At first I thought he was Syrian. "Do you remember
George?" he asked. Almost at once he spoke of the Master. "I have
had a rough life among my own people," he said, "but the blessing
He gave me has lived like a fountain in my heart. It has protected
me through all my sufferings. It has inspired me with the resolve
to work for better conditions among my people. And," he went on,
"that other time when He spoke at a big meeting on the first floor
and you brought me up from the basement and stood me on a chair so
that I could see Him plainly, I thought He was God then and was
frightened." Then he described the Master to the minutest detail:
the colour of His eyes, His skin, His hair, even the two tones of
white in the turban He wore.

A few years ago, during the Second World War, I heard of George
again from his real mother. He was in England, practising medicine
and working with the wounded in the hospitals.)

19 July 1912

This morning I went as usual to the Master's house but was stopped
at the door by Alice Beede.

"Fly," she said, "after Mrs Goodall and Ella. They have your
rosary. The Master just gave it to them."

My precious, precious coral rosary--given to me by the Greatest
Holy Leaf! Given on a wonderful occasion, when a young carpenter
living on Mount Carmel had been healed of typhoid fever. Ruha and
I had climbed the mountain to see him and we were trying to help
his mother when Khanum and the Holy Mother arrived with a doctor.
The doctor went into the hut and the rest of us stayed outside,
Khanum sitting on the ground under a tree, praying on this same
rosary. It was dark by then, and very dark in that little garden.
Khanum was all in shadowy white, from her veil to her feet. When
she had finished praying, she glided like a spirit toward me and
threw the coral chain over my head. A few days ago I took this
great treasure to the Master. "This is the dearest thing I
possess," I said, "except Your tablets and the ring You gave me.
If You will use it, my Lord, it will be infinitely dearer."

I ran up the street after Mrs Goodall and Ella Cooper and when I
overtook them said breathlessly: "Alice Beede has just told me that
the Master gave you my rosary."

"Oh! Take it back," said Mrs Goodall.

But I had come to my senses.

"No, no," I answered. "If the Master gave it to you it is yours."

In the afternoon I went again to my Lord. He was sitting in the
English basement, in His lap a tangled pile of rosaries. I sat
between Ahmad and Edward Getsinger. The Master held up a rosary.

"To whom do I return this?" He inquired of Ahmad.

Edward leaned over to me and whispered: "That is the way your
rosary went."

"Oh no, it isn't," I whispered back.

"What did Juliet say?" asked the Master.

"It was nothing, my Lord, nothing," I said.

He smiled and the subject was dropped.[125]

25 July 1912

She Master is gone. Gone to Dublin, New Hampshire.

I shall never forget the day He left, day before yesterday. I went
up early to His house--but oh, too late! On the street I met Mrs
Hutchinson.

"The Master has gone!" she said, her eyes full of tears, her lips
quivering.

"When?"

"Twenty minutes ago."

"I will go to the station."

I jumped on a subway train and reached the station in a few
minutes. But nowhere did I see the Master and the Persians. I
stopped a porter.

"Did a party of foreigners pass through here just now?"

"Egyptians?"

[Photograph of 'Abdu'l-Baha in Dublin, New Hampshire]

"Yes!" There wasn't a minute to explain.

"Yes. Go to track 19."

But track 19 was deserted except for the gateman.

"Has a party of foreigners passed this way?" I asked him.

"Turks?"

"Yes."

"They are on the train."

"I supposed I couldn't go through?"

"Yes, go through, but come right back."

Smiling my thanks, I dashed down the platform. At one of the
windows in the train I saw a white turban.

"Could I get on the car?" I asked the conductor.

"Yes, get on. It's all right."

__________

"Ah-h, Juliet!"

"Goodbye, my Lord."

"Goodbye." He drew me down beside Him. "You should not have
troubled to come here," He said.

"My heart wouldn't let me do otherwise."

"I will see you in a month.[126] Give My greetings to your mother,
to all the friends; to Mrs Krug, Miss Boylan."

Closely, closely He pressed my hand, pouring the attar of rose of
His Love upon me. Then once more He said goodbye and I left.

It had been too bold, yet even against the rules every door had
opened to me.

__________

The last time I talked with the Master was the day before He left.
Sure that He was to leave that morning,

the twenty-second, I went very early to His house, with eight
palm-leaf fans in my hands. Mamma had sent them for the Master and
the Persians to use on the hot journey.

The master was sitting in the English basement at the window. He
called me to a chair opposite Him. "What are all those for?" He
asked, laughing, waving His hand toward the fans.

I laughed too, for they did look funny. I explained their purpose
and that they were from Mamma.

For a while I sat in silence before Him. Then suddenly I realized
that He was about to leave us, that in just a few minutes He would
be gone. I began to cry quietly.

"Tell Juliet," laughed the Master, "that I am not going today."

At this the sun came out! But soon by tears were flowing again,
this time because His love was melting me.

"Why are you crying, Juliet? I am not going today!"

__________

In the afternoon He called me to Him and I had twenty minutes alone
with Him and Valiyu'llah Khan. I sat with over-brimming eyes,
drinking in the Glory of His Presence.

"Oh Valiyu'llah Khan," I said, "say to the Master for me that I
know He is the Sun and I pray He will always encircle me with His
rays."

"You are very near Me," He answered, "and while you speak the truth
you will always be with Me. I pray that you may become the candle
of New York, spreading the Light of Love all around you."

After this we sat silent in His Presence, silent for a long time.

Once again He saw me when Marjorie came. He told

her she was my child, my "little chicken" and said we must comfort
each other after He has gone. Green Acre, Maine, 1947

If only I had written of Green Acre day by day while we were there
with Him! There are unforgettable things, but so many details,
precious details, have slipped away.

Mamma and I were in Bass Rocks when the Master's invitation reached
us. Bass Rocks, on a cliff above the ocean, was Mamma's paradise
and we could never afford more than two weeks of it. So, when
Ahmad's postcard came, with word from the Master that He wished us
to spend three days with Him in Green Acre, all she could think of
at first was that three days would be lost from her paradise!

"I won't go," she said.

"Oh, Mamma, an invitation from a king is a command, and this is
from the King of kings."

"Well, I'll go for just one night and no more. And I won't take a
suitcase. Just a little Irish bundle, so that we can't stay more
than one night."

So she packed our little Irish bundle: two night-gowns, two
toothbrushes, our combs and brushes and a change of underwear.

When we arrived at the Green Acre Inn the Master met us at the door
with His loving Marhaba; then He drew me into the dining room.

"She does not want?" He asked in English.

I couldn't tell the truth then, but of course He knew.

__________

Pictures come back to me. Mamma and I following Him down a path to
the Eirenion, where He was to speak

to the believers. He was all in white in the dark. Mamma whispering
to me: "It is like following a Spirit."

A tussle day after day to keep Mamma in Green Acre, in which dear
Carrie Kinney helped me.

A night when a horrifying young man came to a meeting at the
Kinneys' house. From head to foot he was covered with soot. His
blue eyes stared out from a dark grey face. This was Fred
Mortenson. He had spent half his boyhood and young manhood in a
prison in Minneapolis. Our beloved Albert Hall, who was interested
in prison work, had found him and taken him out on parole and given
him the Baha'i Message. But Albert Hall was dead when the Master
came to America.

Fred Mortenson, hearing that 'Abdu'l-Baha was in Green Acre, and
having no money to make the trip, had ridden the bumpers [on
freight trains] to His Presence.

He came into the meeting and sat down and was very unhappy when the
Master, pacing back and forth as He talked, took no notice of him.
"It must be that He knows I stole a ride," thought Fred (who told
me all about it afterward). But no sooner was the meeting over and
the Master upstairs in His room than He sent for Fred.

Fred had said nothing to anyone about his trip on the bumpers, but
the minute he entered that upstairs room the Master asked smiling
and with twinkling eyes: "How did you enjoy your ride?" then He
took from Fred's hand his soot-covered cap and kissed it.

Years later, during the First World War, when the American
believers sent ten thousand dollars for the relief of the starving
Arabs, the messenger they chose to carry the money through the
warring countries was: Fred Mortenson. The Master declined the ten
thousand

dollars, relieving the Arabs Himself by His own hard labour. He
went to His estate near Tiberius and Himself ploughed the fields
there; then stored all the grain in the Shrine of the Bab.

For this He was knighted by Great Britain when British rule
replaced Turkish in Palestine. It was meant as an honour, but to
me it was like an insult. It nearly killed me after that to direct
my supplications to Sir 'Abdu'l-Baha 'Abbas.

__________

But to return to Green Acre.

One day the Master, speaking from the porch of somebody's cottage,
while the believers sat on the grass below, made this fascinating
statement: "We are in affinity now because in pre-existence we were
in affinity."

"Let's ask Him what He means by that," whispered Carrie to me.

So, in the evening, while the Master was in our room--Mamma's and
mine--and Carrie sitting there with us, I put the question to Him.

"I will answer you later," He said.

But He never did, outwardly.

In a minute or so Mamma, with that funny boldness of hers which
would sometimes burst through her timidity, said: "Master, I would
like to see You without Your turban."

He smiled. "It is not our custom, Mrs Thompson, to take off our
turbans before ladies, but for your sake I will do it."

And oh, the beauty we saw then! There was something in the silver
hair flowing back from His high forehead, something in the shape
of the head, which, in spite of His age, made me think of Christ.

There was another night, when Carrie, Mamma, and I and a few other
believers were sitting in the second-floor hall. Suddenly, on the
white wall of the floor above, at the head of the staircase, the
Master's great shadow loomed. Mamma slipped over to the foot of the
stairs and looking up with adoring eyes, called: "Master!"

And still another night. This was our third in Green Acre. Again
we were sitting in the second-floor hall, but now the Master was
in our midst.

"We must say goodbye tomorrow," Mamma said to Him.

"Oh no, Mrs Thompson," He laughed. "You are not going tomorrow. One
more day." and He laughed again. "You see, I am leaving for Boston
day after tomorrow and you are of My own family. Therefore you must
travel with Me."

And Mamma submitted now with a satisfaction wonderful to see. She
was proud as a peacock. "He said I was of His own family," she kept
repeating to me.

Once He called Mamma and me into His room and among other things
He said was this: "There are correspondences, Mrs Thompson, between
heaven and earth and Juliet's correspondence in heaven is Mary of
Magdala."

__________

(This diary, owing to the fact that it was written under
difficulties, has large areas left out of it. I find that I have
not spoken of what seemed then such a crucial thing--Lua's
departure for California. But since she was not at our house when
the Master visited us on 12 July, and my last account of being with
her is dated the morning of 11 July, I'm sure she must have left
the night of the eleventh.

I have just one story to tell of Lua, with the Master, in
California. I want to tell it for two reasons. First: because of
its value and also its humour; then because another version of it
is still being told by the believers, less direct and much less
like the Master. This is how I had it from Lua herself.

She and Georgie Ralston (who had gone with Lua to California) were
driving one day with the Master, when He closed His eyes and
apparently feel asleep. Lua and Georgie talked on, I imagine about
their own concerns, for suddenly His eyes sprang open and He
laughed.

"I, me, my, mine: words of the Devil!" He said.) New York

November 1912

The Master is here again!

I met Him at the boat last Monday, 11 November. I met Him alone.
And this is how that happened. At noon on 11 November, Mirza
'Ali-Akbar arrived from Washington to find living quarters for the
Masters and the Persians. I had had a wire from him earlier, asking
me to meet him at the station and to house-hunt with him, which I
did. The Master was to come at ten that night and we thought we had
plenty of time to notify the friends so that they could meet His
ferryboat, but later another wire came to our house, relayed to me
through Mamma and Mr Mills at Mrs Champney's (and luckily catching
me there), saying that the Master would arrive at eight. Through
a series of accidents, Mr Mills' chauffeur landed us first
somewhere in New Jersey and then at the Liberty Street station, and
there was no time to telephone anybody.

"This will be very bad," said Mirza 'Ali-Akbar, but we couldn't
help it.

We had accomplished everything else, had rented again the dear
house on Seventy-Eighth Street (Mrs Champney's) and found extra
rooms for some of the Persians.

Now, Mirza 'Ali-Akbar insisted on my taking Mr Mills' car and going
at breakneck speed to the Twenty-Third Street station to try to
meet the Master there, if He should come that way, while he himself
waited at Liberty Street.

I reached Twenty-Third Street just in time. The ferryboat was
approaching and very close to the dock. Standing at the end of the
pier, I saw it with its chain of lights. I saw Dr Farid. Then the
Master rose from a seat on the deck and entered the brightly lit
cabin.

Soon He came toward me down the gangplank.

"Ah, Juliet," He said, taking my hand in His and drawing me along
with Him, so that I walked beside Him. But He didn't invite me to
drive to His house with Him. Instead, He sent me back after Mirza
'Ali-Akbar--Dr Baghdadi and Mirza Mahmud going with me. We returned
all together to Seventy-Eighth Street.

Oh, to see Him in that house again, sitting in His old corner in
the English basement, the corner in the bay window!

__________

I had been very naughty with Mamma that day and had grieved her.
My precious mother was brought up in luxury, lived in luxury until
Papa died. She cannot get over her sensitiveness about our
too-apparent poverty and she simply won't have people to meals. I
had begged her to make an exception of Mirza 'Ali-Akbar, who was
arriving at such an awkward hour, and to let me bring him back for
lunch. But she wouldn't hear of it.

Whereupon I flew into a temper, told her what I thought of her
"false pride", and stamped out of the house.

Now, entering the Master's house with the three Persians, instead
of a welcome, I received a blow. The Master didn't even look at me.

"How is your mother?" were His first words. "Is she happy?"

Then He told me to go straight back to her but to return the next
day. I went back and comforted her with His rebuke to me.

__________

Early as I could on 12 November, I sought His Beloved Presence.
Ruth and Lawrence White (who have lately been married) were with
Him and Rhoda and Marjorie. It seems impossible sometimes for the
physical ear, or the human mind, to retain His Divine Words. They
moved me to tears.

"Don't cry! Don't cry!" said the Master, with His infinite
tenderness.

The twelfth of November, the Birthday of Baha'u'llah, was the day
of Mrs Krug's meeting and never, never shall I forget it.

There, at Mrs Krug's, the Master invoked Baha'u'llah. And as His
cry, "Ya Baha'u'llah!" rang out, I hid my eyes, for it was as
though He were calling Someone the same plane with Him, Someone
Whom He saw, and Who would certainly come.

He came--the Blessed Beauty, the Lord of Hosts. A Power flashed
into our midst, a great Sacred Power ... I can find no words.
Burning tears poured down my cheeks. My heart shook.

After the meeting, the Master, Who was resting in another room,
sent for me. I had supplicated through

Valiyu'llah Khan that He would come to the meeting at our house
Friday.

"Tomorrow, Juliet," He said, "I will tell you about your meeting.
Now go back to the house and wait till I come."

I did so and He soon came--came and sat in the corner of the window
in the English basement just as He used to last summer. Carrie
Kinney was there and Mr Hoar.

He had spoken so often in public and in private of an inevitable
world war, warning America not to enter it, that I felt moved to
mention it now.

"Will the present war in the Balkans," I asked, "terminate in the
world war?"

"No, but within two years a spark will rise from the Balkans and
set the whole world on fire."

Soon He rose and calling, "Come, Juliet," and beckoning to
Valiyu'llah Khan, took us out to walk in "His garden", that narrow
strip of park above the river. As we followed Him, Valiyu'llah Khan
said: "How blessed to be walking in His footsteps!"

He led us to a bench and sat down between us, clasping my hand
tightly. And then He began to ask me questions: question after
question about the believers in New York, as to a certain condition
among them, a lack of firmness in the Covenant, which I had never
suspected--of which I was really ignorant. Of course, I did know
that earlier there had been awful confusion--some teaching that
'Abdu'l-Baha was like Peter, others that He was Jesus Himself--but
I thought that time was past.

"But I don't know, my Lord!" I said. "If I knew, I would tell you."

"I know you don't know," He laughed, "and I do

know. There are many things I know that you do not know. I was only
testing you. I have loved you for your truthfulness, for the truth
you spoke in a matter you remember. I wanted to see if your heart
were in the same state of truthfulness." Then He said: "With those
who are against the Centre of the Covenant you must not associate
at all. When you find that a soul has turned away from the Covenant
you must cut yourself off completely from him. You will know these
people. You will see it in their faces." (How on earth, I thought,
could I trust my judgement of the faces? He answered my unspoken
thought at once.) "You will see a dimness on the faces, like the
letting down of a veil."

"My Lord," I said, "I feel that I have failed in everything. I have
failed You in all my pitiful efforts to bring about unity. And I
know my failure has been due to lack of strict obedience."

"Obedience," said the Master, "is firmness in the Covenant. You
must associate with the steadfast ones." He mentioned three people
who, since His return--since I met His ferryboat alone--have
wreaked their displeasure on me, one of whom had even "scandalized
my name" (!) for several years; then added to the list--Mason
Remey. This was bitter! "You must be a rock, as they are rocks."

"My Lord," I asked, with a sinking heart, "am I not firm in the
Covenant?"

"You could be more firm," He laughed.

"Oh, my Lord!"

He rose and we began to walk.

"I had hoped," I said miserably, "that nobody loved You better than
I."

"I know you love Me, Juliet," He answered, "but

there are degrees of love." Then He told me He carried a
measuring-rod in His hand by which He measured the love of the
people and that rod was obedience.

At the corner, at the entrance to the park, He paused. "You must
love Me," He said, "for the sake of God."

"You are all I shall ever know of God!"

"I am the Servant of God. You must love Me for His sake and for the
sake of Baha'u'llah. I am very kind to you Juliet," He added.

"I know, my Lord."

"Now go back to your mother, so that she may be pleased with you!"
He laughed, and left me to wait for the bus.

But when He had crossed the street, when I saw Him stop for a
moment to speak to Valiyu'llah Khan, I sank on the chain of the
fence utterly broken-hearted.

Oh I am nothing, nothing, I thought. I have done nothing but fail
Him. Which was just what He wanted me to see, I suppose.

But, could it be that I was not firm? I examined my character: Yes,
it was unstable.

__________

On Wednesday, 14 November, I went very early to my Lord's house.
He was on the point of going out, but He called me to Him.

"My Lord," I said, as He paced up and down His room, "I want to
thank You for Your great mercy last night. I was asleep and You
woke me."

"I pray you may ever be awake. There are a few souls in America,"
He continued, "whom I have chosen to be teachers in this Cause. You
are of those, Juliet. I wish you to have all the qualities of a
teacher. That is all."

Then He asked me to wait till His return. I waited all

day. At five o'clock He came and called me to His room on the upper
floor. With that exquisite courtesy of His, the sweetness of which
almost breaks the heart, He--I can hardly write it--asked me to
excuse Him for keeping me waiting.

"To wait for You, my Lord, is joy. Oh these blessed days when we
can wait for You!"

He went on to tell me why He had been detained ...

__________

(The record of this last month must be sketchy. I cannot copy it
all, as it concerns other people, and conditions that are past and
best forgotten.

28 November 1912

It is Thanksgiving Day, and I am thankful--thankful and happy.
Everything that means my personal happiness, even every hope is
lost. My Lord has entirely stripped my life. But I pray that He has
freed my spirit.

On 15 November, the Master came to our house (48 West Tenth Street)
and gave a most wonderful talk in the front room on the first floor
to a great crowd of people who filled both the front and back rooms
and the hall.[127] I brought George up from the basement and stood
him on a chair, so that he could see the Master. He thought the
Master was God and was frightened.

Driving down to us with Mrs Champney, our Lord had said: "The time
has come for Me to throw bombs!" And He threw them in His talk that
night.

"I have spoken," He said, "in the various Christian churches and
in the synagogues, and in no assembly has

there been a dissenting voice. All have listened and all have
conceded that the Teachings of Baha'u'llah are superlative in
character, acknowledging that they constitute the very essence or
spirit of this age and that there is no better pathway to the
attainment of its ideals. Not a single voice has been raised in
objection. At most there have been some who have refused to
acknowledge the Mission of Baha'u'llah, although even these have
admitted that He was a great teacher, a most powerful soul, a very
great man. Some who could find no other pretext have said: 'These
Teachings are not new; they are old and familiar; we have heard
them before.' Therefore, I will speak to you upon the distinctive
characteristics of the Manifestation of Baha'u'llah and prove that
from every standpoint His Cause is distinguished from all others."

And in this address, which was one of His most powerful, the Master
certainly proved it. The address was taken down and will be
printed.

__________

On 18 November, at the Kinneys' house, the Master put Howard
MacNutt through a severe ordeal, an inevitable ordeal.

Mr MacNutt had been one of the few who, when I first came to New
York, had taught that the Master was "like Peter"--just a glorified
disciple. But for years he had never mentioned this point of view,
and I thought he had gotten over it.

In Chicago there are some so-called Baha'is who are still connected
with Khayru'llah, the great Covenant-breaker, and last week the
Master sent Mr MacNutt to Chicago to see them and try to persuade
them to give up Khayru'llah; otherwise he was to cut them off from
the

[Photograph: 'Abdu'l-Baha with His Persian entourage in the garden
of Howard MacNutt, New York, 1912.]

faithful believers. He--Mr MacNutt--wrote Diya Baghdadi that he had
found these people "angels", and did nothing about the situation.

He had just returned to New York and was to meet the Master at the
Kinneys' house that evening, 18 November, for the first time since
his unfruitful trip. I was in the second-floor hall with the Master
and Carrie Kinney when he arrived. The Master took him to His own
room. After some time they came out together into the hall.

An immense crowd had gathered by then on the first floor, which is
open the whole length of the house.

I heard the Master say to Mr MacNutt: "Go down and tell the people:
'I was like Saul. Now I am Paul, for I see."

"But I don't see," said poor Howard.

"Go down and say: 'I was like Saul.'"

I pulled his coattail. "For God's sake," I said, "go down."

"Let me alone," he replied in his misery.

"GO DOWN," commanded the Master.

Mr MacNutt turned and went down, and his back looked shrunken. The
Master leaned over the stair rail, His head thrown far back, His
eyes closed, in anguished prayer. I sat with Carrie on the top
step, watching Him. This is like Christ in Gethsemane, I thought.

We could hear the voice of Howard MacNutt stumbling through his
confession: "I was like Saul." But he seemed to be saying it by
rote, dragging through it still unconvinced. Nevertheless when he
came upstairs again, the Master deluged him with love.

By that time the Master was back in His room and as Mr MacNutt
appeared at the door, He ran forward to meet him. Our Lord was all
in white that night and as

He ran with His arms wide open He looked like a great flying bird.
He enfolded Howard in a close embrace, kissed his face and neck,
welcomed with ecstasy this broken man who, even though bewildered,
had obeyed Him.

The next night while Mamma, Miss Annie Boylan[128] and I were
together in the Master's Presence, Miss Annie Boylan brought up Mr
MacNutt's name and spoke gloatingly of his chastisement.

The Master sighed. "I immersed Mr MacNutt in the fountain of Job
last night," He said.

__________

The next morning, Sunday, 24 November, I hastened to the Master's
house. I knew it would be full of people, friends from other towns
who had come to attend the banquet and to be with the Master during
His last days here. I knew Mason Remey was in New York and that I
should have to meet him, perhaps this morning; and to face him
before the Master and all the believers would be misery. Our
engagement, in the eyes of the believers, had been the most ideal
romance:[129] I had seen many moved to tears by it, and when the
engagement was broken, every one of them had resented it, taking
up cudgels for Mason and putting the entire blame on me. As for
Mason, he had said: "I am an Indian. I never forgive."

For over a year Mason and I had avoided each other in perfectly
absurd ways. When I had to go down to Washington, I had written
him: "Please stay away from the meetings while I am there." (!)
Then one day, in Washington, when I boarded a moving, rocking
street

car, I fell backward on somebody's lap and turned to find myself
sitting on Mason's knees! I haven't seen him since and now, as I
approached the Master's house, knowing he would surely be
inside--if not at that moment, very soon--I wanted to turn and run.

Suddenly I saw that all this was nonsense and should be overcome
at once, before the Master's departure. An idea occurred to me. I
stood on the doorstep a minute or two bracing myself to carry it
out, to walk boldly up to Mason and say: "Let's go to the Master
now and tell Him we are friends again and want to work together in
the old way as a real brother and sister in the Cause." All at
once, though still a little shy, I felt eager to do this, to put
things right.

I opened the door, and there stood Marie Hopper, evidently waiting
to waylay me. She looked very mysterious, important and excited.
"Juliet," she said, "I must have a word with you. There is
something I have to do."

Then she exhorted me to marry Mason. She told me she knew the
Master wished it; she had "private information". The Master had
said I would "suffer" until I did marry him

"If I have to suffer," I said, "I prefer a respectable martyrdom!
I'd be nothing but a common prostitute if I married him. And I
can't believe, Marie, that the Master really said this."

May Maxwell came up at that moment, very earnest and starry-eyed,
to reinforce Marie.

"Very well," I said, "I will talk with the Master myself about it.
He is just upstairs, thank God, no further away than the top floor
of this house, and whatever He wants me to do, I will do."

I went up with Valiyu'llah Khan. But first I stopped on

the third floor and had a little private cry with Valiyu'llah.
Percy Grant was to come the next day to the Master--this would be
his last visit--and who could tell what would happen then; what
miracle might not happen; what change might not take place in him?
And now, Mason Remey looming up again!

We found the Master on the point of going out, standing in His
room, holding a big, white, folded umbrella. I knelt and He pressed
my head against His arm and took my hand in a tight clasp. "Speak,"
He said.

"Tell the Master, Valiyu'llah Khan, that I know He will laugh at
this, because I want to speak about marrying Mason. I have heard
from Marie Hopper that the Master wishes it. If He really does wish
it, I am ready."

"Na! Na!" (No! No!) said the Master. His eyes were twinkling and
the corners of His mouth quivering as though He were trying not to
smile. "It was this way," He said. "I never interfere. Mrs Hopper
came and told me that she wanted to unite you and Mr Remey. I said
'Very well, try.' But it is just as I wrote you long ago. Unless
there is perfect agreement--perfect harmony--love, these things are
not good."

I kissed His tender hand.

Needless to say, after this, I couldn't go near Mason Remey.

__________

On 20 November, the Master spent the morning in my little
room.[130] Once more His Glory shone in my room; His Life was
diffused in it. It is a sanctuary now to me, like a chapel in our
house.

He had brought Mrs Champney with Him and Mr MacNutt and, during the
morning, Mr MacNutt, who

was standing behind the Master very humbly, lifted the hem of His
'aba to his lips.

Mamma brought the Master some soup which she had prepared
especially for Him.

"I was just wishing for soup," He said sweetly. "You, Mrs Thompson,
have the reality of love."

Mamma then showed Him Papa's picture and He kissed it.

After a while He left us and was absent for some time. When He came
back He said: "I have been in every room in your house."

And when He bade us goodbye, as He swung down the stairs with His
powerful step, His voice rang out: "This house is blessed."

After He had gone I sat in the chair He had sat in and wrote an
appeal to Percy Grant: "I tried to reach you by phone this morning
to tell you the Master is soon returning to Haifa and that He
wishes to take His portrait with Him." (Percy had been exhibiting
it in the chapel of his Parish House.) "And to ask if some time
tomorrow I could come for it. I want to thank you too for your
hospitality to the Master's picture and for your beautiful
reference to it last Sunday, of which I have heard.

"You have given to many an opportunity to see at least a portrayal,
if a very weak one, of a dear face which I doubt if most of us will
see again. He is going back into dangerous conditions. Dear Percy,
will you let Him go without saying goodbye to Him? Only the other
day he was speaking of you."

To this I received a very stiff answer, merely asking the date of
the Master's sailing and His address.

__________

On Saturday, the twenty-third, the Master spent most of the day in
Montclair. When I went to His Seventy-

Eighth Street house in the late afternoon I was met with joyous
news. By staying over in Montclair He had missed reserving His
passage on the Mauretania and His sailing was now delayed! Also I
heard that Percy had telephoned and asked for permission to call
Monday.

That night the Master gave a banquet at the Great Northern Hotel.

May Maxwell, Marie Hopper, Marjorie, Rhoda, Mamma, and I sat at the
same table. Just before the food was served the Master rose from
his seat, a vial of attar of rose in His hand, and passed among all
the tables, anointing every one of His guests. As His wonderful
hand, dripping perfume, touched my forehead, as He scattered on my
hair the fragrant drops, my whole being seemed to wake and sparkle.

At the end of His talk[131] He said: "Such a banquet and such an
assemblage command the sincere devotion of all present and invite
the down-pouring of the blessings of God. Therefore be ye assured
and confident that the confirmations of God are descending upon
you, the assistance of God will be given unto you, the breaths of
the Holy Spirit will quicken you with a new life, the Sun of
Reality will shine gloriously upon you and the fragrant breeze of
the rose gardens of Divine Mercy will waft through the windows of
your souls. Be ye confident and steadfast ..."

__________

The following morning, 25 November, I spent with the Master. One
heavenly thing He said was this: "I have searched throughout the
length and breadth of this land for flames, I want the flames! The
solid ones are no good." Then He told me I was a flame. And He
spoke

[Photograph: 'Abdu'l-Baha in banquet at the Great Northern Hotel,
23 November 1912.]

beautifully of Mamma: "If I had a mother like yours, Juliet, I
would never deviate, even by a hair's breadth, from her wishes."

That night Mamma went to see Him with me. He was looking utterly
spent, but He insisted on keeping us--wouldn't let us go for at
least an hour.

In the meantime, at five o'clock, Percy Grant had come. The Master
was out but expected back any minute. He had had to address a
Women's Club early in the afternoon and from there was to go to Mrs
Cochran's. Through Valiyu'llah Khan, He had asked me to wait and
detain Percy. While I was waiting in the English basement, Carrie
and Mrs Champney with me, a taxicab stopped at the door; then in
came Dr Grant, very big and rigid, his black clerical broadcloth
and his white clerical collar firmly moulded around him.

Soon the Master returned. I can still see that Figure entering the
room like a mighty Eastern king, in His long green 'aba, edged with
white fur, His white turban; I can see His outstretched arms, His
divinely sweet smile; can hear the music of His voice: that long
"Oh-h! Oh-h!" of welcome. "Oh-h! Oh-h!, Dr Grant!" as though to
meet Dr Grant were the most delectable thing on earth.

Then He took Percy's hand and held it, never letting it go while
I saw them together, and began to talk smilingly to him.

"You must excuse me for keeping you waiting, Dr Grant. I am very,
very sorry to have kept you waiting, very sorry. But I was captured
by three hundred women this afternoon. Is it not a dreadful thing
to be captured by so many women? (At this I felt wickedly amused.)
"The women in America dominate the men," the Master continued.
"Come upstairs with Me." And still

holding Percy by the hand, with the lightness of a spirit He led
him up the first flight. I shall never cease to see those two
figures. The King of the East--and the West--in the garments of an
Eastern king, leading the way to an upper chamber; the resistant
clergyman, hardened into his clerical clothes, stiffly following,
pulled up the stairs by a too strong hand.

But when Percy came down, after a very long time, his whole face
was changed. His eyes were like burning stars, his mouth softened,
relaxed. He grasped my hand and pressed it. "May I take you home,
Juliet?"

"Thanks, Percy, I am staying here for a while."

Soon after he left, Dr Farid rushed down the stairs to me.

"There is hope--great hope," he said. "He was a changed man today.
Entirely different from last summer. He seemed deeply touched at
the thought of the Master returning into danger and asked if we
would cable him if any trouble should arise, so that he might do
whatever he could. He asked also if, from time to time, the Master
would send him news, 'through one of your humblest followers,' he
said.

"When he spoke of danger the Master replied that He had never
feared danger and told him the story of the Turkish Investigating
Committee sent to 'Akka by 'Abdu'l-Hamid. How the verdict of this
Committee was that He--'Abdu'l-Baha--must die; that He must either
be crucified at the gate of 'Akka or sent alone to the desert of
Fezan, where He would inevitably starve. How at that time the
Italian consul, a friend, had arranged for a ship to be sent to
Haifa, ostensibly with cargo, but really to help the Master escape.
And how the Master had said: 'My Father, Baha'u'llah, never
delivered Himself, though He had the opportunity. From this

Prison He spread His Teachings. I, therefore, will follow in His
footsteps. I will not deliver Myself.'

"Then," Dr Farid went on, "the Master told Dr, Grant of the
hastening of the Committee to Turkey to lay its verdict with all
possible speed before the Sultan, but before they landed on Turkish
soil, 'the cannon of God had boomed forth at the gates of the
Sultan's palace.' 'Abdu'l-Hamid was deposed by the rising of the
Young Turks and 'Abdu'l-Baha set free.

"'So,' ended the Master, 'God delivered Me.'"

The miracle had happened. Percy Grant was "a changed man!"

__________

Not long was I allowed to cherish my hope!

The next day, 26 November, while I was waiting in the Master's
house, He sent Dr Baghdadi to bring me to His room. May Maxwell was
with Him and Dr Baghdadi remained. I sat on the floor at my Lord's
feet.

Smiling down on me, He said: "Why does Mrs Maxwell love you so,
Juliet?"

"Because she is my spiritual mother."

"In Montreal, when I was staying with her, she was always
mentioning your name and Lua's. 'Juliet, Lua. Juliet, Lua. Juliet,
Lua,'" chanted the Master. "That was her song."

"May and Lua, May and Lua," I smiled, "are the two dearest names
to my heart."

"This is well," said the Master.

May turned to Dr Baghdadi. "Ask the Master," she said, "if I may
be allowed to speak of something to Him." And when she had received
permission: "My heart is tortured at the thought of all the
children who are starving for love in these days. So little is
understood

[Photograph of Juliet Thompson and may Maxwell]

of the privileges of motherhood. The children are left to nurses
and brought up in blighting environments. I want to ask His prayers
for the mothers of America. Juliet," she whispered to me, "join in
this supplication."

I put my best foot forward to support her: "I should like to join
in May's supplication that the women may soon realize that
motherhood is their first function." But, even as I spoke the words
I saw how funny they were, coming from me--and that I had spread
a snare for my own feet, which I suspect May wanted me to do!

The Master smiled broadly.

"What are you doing advocating this, Juliet? Where are your
children? Mrs Maxwell has a child, but where are yours? If you had
married, you too could have brought children to me, one to sit on
each knee! A sterile woman is like a fruitless tree. Of course,"
He added, smiling again and quoting my words of last summer, "of
course you will say: 'What can I do with my heart.'"

"No, I won't say that any more," I answered. "You can do something
with my heart if I cannot. You can make me a new heart. And now,
since the Master has spoken of this," I said to Dr Baghdadi, "there
is something I should like to ask Him. Last spring and summer He
was indefinite with me about ... Dr Grant; perhaps, as I have been
thinking lately, because I wasn't strong enough to bear the truth.
But I believe I am stronger now and ready, at a word from Him, to
renounce this hope. Is it not to be fulfilled?"

"No," said the Master. "Otherwise, I would have told you."

For a moment we sat in His Presence silent. In the fire of that
Presence, in that little moment, my hope of twelve years melted
away. As it vanished, a miracle happened. The Being sitting before
me, now writing on a bit

of parchment held in the palm of His hand, changed from a body to
a sun-like Spirit. I saw Him translucent, luminous, and depths of
iridescence opened behind Him.

"Oh," I cried, tears coursing down my cheeks, "since that phantom
of a hope went, I have entered the Presence of God."

The Master said nothing. He was still writing, writing
mysteriously.

"May," I whispered, "do you remember that prayer: 'As the Pen moves
over the pages of the Tablet by which the musk of significances in
the world of creation is exhaled?'"

After a while the Master looked up. "I wish you to marry, Juliet,"
He said. "I wish you to bring Me children to hold on My knees. God
will send someone to you who will be agreeable to you."

What did it matter?

"May I ask one thing, my Lord? May I supplicate for Percy's soul,
that in the end he will see the truth?"

"We must always pray for him," answered the Master.

Mrs Krug and Carrie came in then. I hated to cry before them, but
I couldn't stop.

"Don't cry, don't cry," said the Master, as only He can say it.

"Oh, that Voice!" whispered May.

"No, no. Don't cry." This from Grace Krug, with a very disapproving
look.

"I seem to be in flames, my Lord--the flames of Thy love, Thy
Presence--and to be melting."

But He saw deeper. "Khayr," (no) He said slowly.

"NO!" echoed Mrs Krug.

"You must be happy," the Master ended, "because of this thing I
have told you."

As I said, this happened in the afternoon of 26 November. The
morning had been a tremendous one.

Knowing that my Lord would be at the Kinneys', I went directly
there. On the way up in the bus a great wave of tears, like a tidal
wave, rose from my heart (I didn't know why) and threatened at any
moment to break over me.

I found the Master on the upper floor of the Kinneys' house with
the Persians, Carrie and Ned, Nellie Lloyd, and Mr Mills. The
Tablet of the Branch[132] was being translated under the
supervision of the Master. Dr Baghdadi and Dr Farid were working
on it, submitting it time after time to the Master before He was
satisfied with their rendering. I shall never forget His sternness,
His terrific majesty as He directed that translation.

The wave of tears did break as I listened and watched. I was shaken
beyond all control. Mirza Mahmud and Valiyu'llah Khan tenderly
tried to calm me.

7 December 1912

28 November, Thanksgiving Day, was to be a day of rest for our
Beloved Lord. It had been given out that no one would be received
at the house that day. So, when the telephone rang about noon and
Ahmad, at the other end, asked me to come immediately to the
Master, I felt so singled out and privileged! And to be alone with
Him and the Persians--that would be something important, something
wonderful.

But He met me with a grave, almost stern face. And

with a command which at once banished my complacent hope. Swiftly
crossing His room to the door where I stood, He said, without even
a greeting: "Mrs May Maxwell is sick. I want you to go with some
medicine to her and to spend the afternoon taking care of her." He
walked back to the window, beckoning me to follow Him. Then He
picked up a glass from His table and a bottle of rosewater. "Give
her this," He said. "Pour out so much," (He poured about an inch
into the glass) "and so much water. Put in some sugar, the sugar
of your love. Drink this yourself." He gave me the glass He had
been preparing, for my cure, and, looking pointedly at me, began
to pray.

"Ya Baha'u'l-Abha!"

Feeling strangely numb, I said, as I drank the rosewater: "Ya
Baha'u'l-Abha!"

He turned to the window and looked out.

"Ya Baha'u'l-Abha!"

"Ya Baha'u'l-Abha," I echoed.

Again and again He repeated the Greatest Name and I repeated it
after Him, praying with Him.

At last He said: "Now go to Mrs May Maxwell. Telephone your mother
that I have sent you to her as she is sick, to spend the afternoon
with her."

Then He bowed, still grave, and I left Him, the bottle of rosewater
in my hand.

__________

(Footnote. 1947. Years later I was to see the meaning of this and
that I had utterly failed in administering the "medicine". Mrs May
Maxwell wouldn't drink it; she said I had put too much sugar in it.
I loved her with a personal love. It never rose to the heights of
an all-forgiving love, and so I

couldn't overcome that strange vein of cruelty in the love I think
she felt for me. We were still divided when she died. This was one
of my great failures.

Another significant thing: Nine years after that date, on 28
November 1921, our Beloved Lord ascended. Could this have been the
reason, with His pre-vision, that He spent that day in 1912 in
solitude?)

__________

Within the next day or two, Mrs May Maxwell and I were together in
His Presence. "Am I spiritually sick, my Lord?" she asked. "For I
was not physically sick the day you sent me the rosewater."

"Yes," He answered gently, "you are spiritually sick. Had you been
physically sick I would have sent you a doctor instead of Juliet."

__________

On 29 November, May Maxwell, Dorothea Spinney, and I were with the
Master when Esther Foster came in. May, Miss Spinney, and I rose.

"All of you may stay," said the Master, "on the condition that
Juliet doesn't cry."

I tried so hard after that to squeeze back the tears, but I
couldn't. I wiped them away furtively as they trickled down one by
one.

He kept us with Him an hour. Dorothea Spinney--an Englishwoman and
a Theosophist--spoke of a vision she had had while meditating. She
has seen a great globe of fire which she seemed to know was "the
Centre of Peace".

"I should like to understand this," she said. "What, or Who is the
Centre of Peace?"

The Master had been writing on a piece of parchment held in the
palm of His hand. He continued to write, not looking up, leaving
Miss Spinney's question in the air.

And all the time He glowed more and more, like the sun dispersing
clouds, pulsing out with every breath intenser light.

"Look at His Face," I whispered to Miss Spinney, "and see the
Centre of Peace."

By and by He spoke: "Excuse me for writing," He said, "it was very
important. You asked me concerning visions. Sometimes the thought
becomes abstracted, enters the World of Reality, and there makes
discoveries."

Then He rose and began to pace up and down and discovered that I
was crying.

"Oh my Lord," I cried, in a panic, "what are You going to do with
me?"

"I am going to find a Mister for you," He laughed.

__________

Those last meetings in the Kinneys' house. Those divine talks of
the Good Shepherd leaving His flock for a while: too tender, too
sad for the heart to bear.[133]

One day, however, He was very stern. Holding the book of the Hidden
Words in His hand, walking back and forth with that step which
always makes me think of the prophecy, "Who is this that cometh
from Bozrah, Who treadeth the wine-press in His fury?" lifting the
Hidden Words high, He said: "Whosoever does not live up to these
Words is not of Me."

__________

Mr Howard Colby Ives accepted the Cause in those days. Mrs Moore
accepted. Touched to the core of their beings they would sit with
streaming eyes in the meetings.

[Photograph: 'Abdu'l-Baha with the Kinney family in their home in
New York.]

At last came the day before He sailed.

"May I stay in some corner of this house all day," I asked, "that
I may breathe the same air with You this last day?"

"What does your mother say about it?"--laughing.

"She said I might."

"Very well."

In the afternoon He called me. He kept me in the room a long, long
time, seeing many others while I sat there. When He had dismissed
them all, He came close to me and took my hand.

"There is a matter," He said, "about which I want to speak to you.
The photographs of the portrait you painted of Me, you have offered
them for the Mashriqu'l-Adhkar. I know your circumstances, Juliet.
You have not complained to Me, you have said nothing, but I know
them. I know your affairs are in confusion, that you have debts,
that you have that house, that you have to take care of your
mother. Now I want you to keep the money" (for the photographs)
"for yourself. No, no; do not feel unhappy," (as I began to cry)
"this is best. You must do exactly as I say. I will speak about
this Myself to the believers. I will tell them," He laughed, "that
is it My command."

I thanked Him brokenly.

I can see Him now, pacing up and down the room in front of the line
of Persians, who stood with bowed heads and folded arms in the
Glory of His Presence, deeply aware of its Divineness.

Then Valiyu'llah spoke: "Juliet wants to know if You are pleased
with her, or not?"

(I had spoken out my troubled heart to dear Valiyu'llah.)

"I am very much pleased with the love of Juliet," answered the
Master.

My Lord, I pray that my life may please You."

"Insha'llah." And that was all!

"And that my services may become acceptable to You. I know I have
not begun to serve You yet."

The Master said nothing.

But that night He healed my broken heart, healed it by a tone in
His voice as He spoke to my mother, which was the essence of God's
tenderness, a tone unimaginable to those who have only heard the
human voice.

As Mamma approached Him to bid Him goodbye, He said: "Ah, the
mother of Juliet; the mother of Julie!" (Mamma's pet name for me.)

"I can't bear to say goodbye," said Mamma.

"Insha'llah, I shall meet you in 'Akka, Mrs Thompson, and there I
shall greet you with 'Welcome! Welcome!'"

This was on the night of 4 December.

He asked me to come to the Emerys' (where He had been staying for
a few days) the morning of 5 December, the day of His sailing; and
I was there at eight o'clock. That last morning. I stood at the
door of His room, gazing in, my eyes drinking their fill, if they
ever could drink their fill, of the Divine Figure as He sat, or
stood, or moved about the room.

He called me in twice. The second time He took my hand. "Remember,"
He said, "I am with you always. Baha'u'llah will be with you
always."

Carrie Kinney was there that morning and Ned, and 'Ali Quli Khan
and Florence, Edna Ballora and her husband, Harriet Magee, Mrs
Parsons, and Mrs Hannen. The Master had invited Mamma too, but she
had not felt well enough to go.

"Rest assured," He said when I told Him, "that she will be healed."
And He filled my arms with fruit for her.

We drove to the boat, then followed Him up to His cabin. Many
believers were crowding the cabin. Later we all went upstairs and
sat in a large room with Him. Very soon He rose, and, walking up
and down, delivered to us His last spoken message.[134]

First He described heartbreakingly the war now raging in the
Balkans. Then He said: "As to you: your efforts must be lofty.
Exert yourselves with heart and soul that perchance through your
efforts the light of Universal Peace may shine and this darkness
of estrangement and enmity may be dispelled from amongst men ...

"You have no excuse to bring before God if you fail to live
according to His Command, for you are informed of that which
constitutes the good-pleasure of God ...

"It is My hope that you may become successful in this high calling,
so that like brilliant lamps you may cast light upon the world of
humanity and quicken and stir the body of existence like unto a
spirit of life.

"This is eternal glory. This is everlasting felicity. This is
immortal life. This is heavenly attainment. This is being created
in God's image and likeness. And unto this I call you, praying to
God to strengthen and bless you."

[Photograph: 'Abdu'l-Baha leaving America on the Celtic from New
York City.]

He seated Himself again in a corner of the large cabin, all the
believers flocked around Him. I sat opposite Him at a little
distance, weeping quietly. A great fear had taken possession of me,
a question risen in my mind which must be answered or I should have
no peace--I should be left in a frantic state. I rose and walked
over to Him and stood before Him.

"My Lord," I said, "each time I have parted from You: in Haifa, in
Europe, You have said You would call me again to You. Each time You
gave me hope that I would see You again. But this time You gave me
no hope. Won't I see You again, my Lord?"

"This is My hope," He replied.

"But still You don't tell me, my Lord, and it makes me feel
hopeless."

"You must not feel hopeless."

This was all He said to me. It killed me. While I sat, weighed down
with despair and grief, He drew from an inside pocket the purse Dr
Grant had sent Him last summer, laid it on His knee and looked at
me. To me it seemed a promise that He Himself would take care of
Percy. And this was the very last.

It was death to leave that ship. I stood on the pier with May
Maxwell, tears blurring my sight. Through them I could see the
Master in the midst of the group of Persians waving a patient hand
to us. It waved and waved, that beautiful patient hand, till the
Figure was lost to sight.

[Photograph: 'Abdu'l-Baha--the last photo taken in America, 1912.]

(1947. Because of those blurring tears I could not see the look on
His face, the look of profound agony, as though He were on the
cross, as He bade His immature children farewell, foreseeing for
us so many sorrows, so many failures, and a world gone to pieces
because of our failures.

This look I have seen ever since in a photograph taken at that last
moment.)

Diary of Juliet Thompson: Notes Chapter 4

Notes

[1] `Abdu'l-Baha.

[2] Holy Mother is the title of Munirih Khanum, the wife of
`Abdu'l-Baha. Holy Leaves designates the women of Baha'u'llah's
family.

[3] Mrs Carrie Kinney, a prominent Baha'i from New York.

[4] Dr Aminu'llah Farid (Ameen Ullah Fareed), nephew of
`Abdu'l-Baha.

[5] Dr Farid's half brother. (p. 5.)

[6] Father of Dr Farid and brother-in-law of `Abdu'l-Baha. He was
one of the Persian teachers sent to America by `Abdu'l-Baha at the
turn of the century.

[7] Rector of the Church of the Ascension in New York. Juliet was,
at this time, in love with him.

[8] Sister of `Abdu'l-Baha; the premier woman of the Baha'i
Revelation.

[9] Baha'u'llah.

[10] Two of `Abdu'l-Baha's daughters.

[11] A Baha'i from Paris.

[12] An allusion to Rev. 5:5.

[13] See Luke 1:22

[14] Howard MacNutt, a leading Baha'i from Brooklyn.

[15] Íran was at this time in the midst of the Constitutional
Revolution, 1906-1911. Eventually, the country was divided into two
spheres of influence: Russia took the north, and Great Britain the
south.

[16] Cf. Rev. 21:4, Isa. 25:8.

[17] Cf. John 3:8.

[18] Lua Getsinger; one of the first American Baha'is; the "Mother
Teacher of the West."

[19] Mrs Ellen Beecher, grandmother of Hand of the Cause Dorothy
Baker.

[20] Mrs Agnes Parsons, a prominent believer from Washington, D.C.

[21] A Persian Baha'i living in New York.

[22] Mrs Mabel Rice Wray Ives, a Baha'i from Newark, N.J.

[23] Cf. Mark 10:24.

[24] Matt. 10.8.

[25] Matt. 13:27.

[26] This had taken place on 27 April 1909.

[27] The Shrine of Baha'u'llah.

[28] NOTE: A discrepancy exists in the various manuscripts of
Juliet Thompson's diary concerning the identities of the children
from the East mentioned here.

[29] John 10:16.

[30] Leaders of Muslim orders.

[31] This I have written from memory with the help of Munavvar
Khanum, so it is not so strong as when the master gave it.--J.T.

[32] Cf. Matt. 19:14, Mark 10:14, and Luke 18:16.

[33] That day (the third of July) we had been to the House of the
Blessed Perfection in `Akka. It is a palace, spacious, stately, but
it has not the charm of the Master's House. In the room of the
Blessed Perfection was a marvellous atmosphere. I felt intense
vibrations, currents of Life. When we left, X leaned her head
against the door.--J.T.

[34] Ibrahim George Khayru'llah (Kheiralla)--The believer who first
brought the Baha'i Faith to America. He later rebelled against
`Abdu'l-Baha and broke the Covenant.

[35] Cf. Luke 18:9-14.

[36] That is, Howard MacNutt, Hooper Harris, and William Hoar. This
refers to disputes involving these believers which took place in
the New York Baha'i Community.

[37] The early name of the Spiritual Assembly of the Baha'is of New
York.

[38] See God Passes By, pp. 269-71.

[39] Isa. 53:5, 1 Pet. 2:24.

[40] Mrs Louise Gibbons, a Baha'i from New York.

[41] Rev. O. M. Fischer, an Episcopal clergyman who was also a
Baha'i in New York.

[42] Mr Albert Windust, a Baha'i from Chicago.

[43] Tahirih, Babi heroine and Letter of the Living.

[44] A musical term: an altered note (such as a sharp or flat)
foreign to the key indicated by the signature.

[45] Mr Sidney Sprague, a prominent American Baha'i and travelling
teacher.

[46] In 1893 Rev. Grant had become rector of the New York Church
of the Ascension, long the stronghold of fashionable, orthodox
Episcopalians, but now with a dwindling congregation in a declining
neighbourhood. His sweeping innovations were successful, but
controversial: pews were no longer private property, but opened to
the public; sermons were preached on issues of the day; new
afternoon musical services attracted hundreds; Sunday evenings, the
People's Forum debated political and economic questions, often
until midnight. Grant became the militant leader of the radical
wing of the city's clergy.

[47] An oral tradition of the teachings of Muhammad.

[48] The intent of this tradition is, of course, metaphorical. The
Baha'i Faith rejects the doctrine of Divine incarnation. The
Guardian of the Baha'i Faith states: "God ... can in no wise
incarnate His infinite, His unknowable, His incorruptible and
all-embracing Reality in the concrete and limited frame of a mortal
being. Indeed, the God Who could so incarnate His own reality
would, in the light of the teachings of Baha'u'llah, cease
immediately to be God." (World Order of Baha'u'llah, p. 112)

[49] At this time, large numbers of people were becoming Baha'is
in Íran.

[50] The Ridvan Garden, a short distance from `Akka, was one of
Baha'u'llah's favourite resting places.

[51] Some Answered Questions.

[52] The Baha'i Proofs.

[53] Many of the early American Baha'is believed that `Abdu'l-Baha
was the Return of Christ, despite His many denials. In one Tablet
`Abdu'l-Baha wrote: "You have written that there is a difference
among the believers concerning the `Second Coming of Christ'.
Gracious God! Time and again this question hath arisen, and its
answer hath emanated in a clear and irrefutable statement from the
pen of `Abdu'l-Baha, that what is meant in the prophecies by the
`Lord of Hosts' and the `Promised Christ' is the Blessed Perfection
(Baha'u'llah) and His holiness ... (the Bab). My name is
`Abdu'l-Baha. My qualification is `Abdu'l-Baha. My reality is
`Abdu'l-Baha. My praise is `Abdu'l-Baha. Thraldom to the Blessed
Perfection is my glorious and refulgent diadem, and servitude to
all the human race my perpetual religion ... No name, no title, no
mention, no commendation have I, nor will ever have, except
`Abdu'l-Baha." (World Order of Baha'u'llah, p. 139)

[54] The passage in the Aqdas reads: "Let nothing grieve thee, O
Land of Ta [Tihran] ... Ere long will the state of affairs within
thee be changed, and the reins of power fall into the hands of the
people." (The Kitab-i-Aqdas, paras 91 and 93, pp. 53, 53)

[55] 1936. There seems no reason to conceal it now. He gave me a
cylinder of gold louis, so that I might be able to return.--J.T.

The Louis d'or was a gold twenty franc piece, at the time worth
slightly more than five US dollars.--ED.

[56] Haji Mirza Haydar-`Ali, an early believer and champion teacher
of the Cause in Íran, was known to Western pilgrims as the "Angel
of Carmel". See A. Q. Faizi, Stories from the Delight of Hearts.

[57] Cf. Mark 14:3.

[58] "There is no room in my heart for any but Thee," I said to Him
once. "I want you to be like that," He answered, "to be filled with
the Love of God, to be entirely cut from the world and always to
hold to My garment."--J.T.

[59] When He is speaking, His mouth has an upward turn at the
comers, which gives Him that divine, smiling expression. --J.T.

[60] Cf. Matt. 13:8 and Luke 8:8.

[61] Cf. Isa. 66:1.

[62] Isa. 52:7.

[63] In the Arab and Muslim city of `Akka, women were obliged to
remain indoors.

[64] Rev. 16:15, 1 Thess. 5:2. See also Matt. 24:43 and Luke 12:39.

[65] Rev. 1:12.

[66] This time my heart is more sensitive. His voice pierces and
wrings it. Every note of that voice makes my heart quiver.--J.T.

[67] Dr Yunis Khan Afrukhtih, who served `Abdu'l-Baha in Haifa from
1900 to 1909; Mirza Badi'u'llah, half brother of `Abdu'l-Baha; and
Mirza Munir-i Zayn, son of the famous Baha'i scribe
Zaynu'l-Muqarrabin.

[68] While I was walking with Ruha the day before on Mount Cannel,
as we sat on a fallen tree to rest, she had broached the subject
of my marrying Mason Remey. Our Lord had told her to ask me about
it. "You are treating Juliet like one of Your own daughters who
were married in this way," Ruha had said. "It is too strong a test
for her." "Just ask her and see what she says," our Lord had
repeated. "But," added Ruha to me, "if the Master should command
me now: `Go, leave your husband and children and jump into the
sea,' I would go and jump!"--J.T.

[69] Mirza Mihdi, the Purest Branch, the youngest son of
Baha'u'llah and His consort Navvab (Ásiyyih Khanum died after an
accidental fall from the roof of the prison in `Akka. See God
Passes By, pp. 188-89.

[70] The cylinder of gold louis the Master had given me so that I
might return to Him.--J.T.

[71] Cf. Matt. 10:14, Mark 6:11, and Luke 9:5.

[72] Ahmad Sohrab, who had lived in the United States, but was at
this time residing in Egypt.

[73] Professor Dickinson Miller, educator and philosopher; then a
professor at Columbia University.

[74] Matt. 5:13, Luke 14:34.

[75] Disputes had developed in New York between Mr MacNutt and
other prominent Baha'is. It became the general opinion that
MacNutt's teaching of the Faith was incorrect in some aspects.--ED.

[76] Enlarging the Board from nine to nineteen members.--J.T.

[77] He said "see them again." Ten years ago, in 1926, I went--and
saw them, and the beloved Guardian. But the Master was not
there.--J.T.

[78] During the First World War, Hippolyte, then in the army,
guarded a bridge!--J. T.

[79] 1947. When I saw Laura this year I said: "Remember Thonon!"
"The waterfall," she answered.--J.T.

[80] Edith Sanderson, a Baha'i from Paris, and her mother.

[81] The X of the Thonon diary is not the X of the `Akka diary, but
somebody else who must remain incognito.--J.T.

This X is Annie Boylan.--ED.

[82] See Gen. 18:32.

[83] "He has such a good, such a simple bearing." "Yes, and eyes
of fire!"

[84] Apparently, either May Maxwell or Marjorie Morton.

[85] 1924. Lilian died serving in Persia.--J.T.

1947. Some years later Elizabeth also died from an illness
contracted there.--J.T.

[86] Sultan Husayn Mirza; grandson of Nasiri'd-Din Shah.--Ed.

[87] 1947. Years later I heard that he had been born again--a
Baha'i--and was serving the Cause with great zeal in Persia. His
poor young brother, Prince Bahram, died in the First World War, on
a torpedoed ship.--J.T.

[88] Juliet was, at this time, a member of the Church of the
Ascension. It was not until much later that the Guardian of the
Faith instructed the Baha'is of the United States to sever formal
affiliations with churches. See Messages to America, pp. 4-5.

[89] Cf. Star of the West, III:3 (1912) p. 4.

[90] Ahmad Sohrab, now part of `Abdu'l-Baha's entourage.

[91] 1947. In the years that followed she would often say to me:
"I love the Master more than you do, Julie, and I obey Him better
than you do, for He performed a miracle for me, which He never did
for you! He took all the bitterness out of my heart."

There was another occasion, which I find I haven't mentioned in my
diary, when my darling little mother knelt before the Master. This
was a public occasion, after He had spoken in a church. The service
over, the whole congregation, including a multitude of believers,
surged toward the chancel to shake hands with Him. Mamma was the
only one in that long procession who sank to her knees and kissed
his hand.--J.T.

[92] See The Promulgation of Universal Peace, Second Edition, pp.
7-9.

[93] See The Promulgation of Universal Peace, Second Edition, pp.
9-11.

[94] A follower of the economic philosophy of Henry George who
advocated a single tax on profits from the sale of land.

[95] An allusion to the Last Supper. See Mark 14:15 and Luke 22:12.

[96] Cf. The Promulgation of Universal Peace, Second Edition, pp.
11-13.

[97] Cf. Some Early Baha'is of the West, p. 78.

[98] See The Promulgation of Universal Peace, Second Edition, pp.
14-16.

[99] At the time, equal to about two-hundred-fifty dollars.

[100] This baby was Mary Maxwell, later Amatu'l-Baha Ruhiyyih
Khanum.

[101] 1947. This was fulfilled years after, but by that time my
heart was severed; and to my everlasting shame, I was cruel to
him.--J.T.

[102] Cf. The Promulgation of Universal Peace, Second Edition, pp.
32-34.

[103] Dr Farid, within the year, turned traitor.--J.T.

[104] `Ali Quli Khan, the Chargé d'Affaires for the Persian
Legation.

[105] See The Baha'i World, Vol. 12, p. 668.

[106] The wife of `Ali Quli Khan.

[107] Senator Stephen Benton Elkins; died 4 January 1911.

[108] Mrs Barney Hemmick, a Baha'i from Washington, D.C.

[109] Mr MacClung died soon afterward.--J.T.

[110] At 227 Riverside Drive, New York.--ED.

[111] See The Promulgation of Universal Peace, Second Edition, pp.
123-26.

[112] See The Promulgation of Universal Peace, Second Edition, pp.
126-29.

[113] In December of that same year, Mrs Tatum came to see me. "The
Master," told me, "said such a strange thing to me just before He
left America. I had been saying how sorry I was that I had left my
car in Boston and couldn't put it at His disposal as I had done
last spring. He answered: `Soon, Mrs Tatum, you will not need your
car, for you will be riding in a chariot of fire.' I wonder,
Juliet, what He meant by that!" Within a few weeks, dear Mrs Tatum
died suddenly.--J.T.

[114] Louis Potter, one of the best-known sculptors in this
country, also died in 1912, in August, very tragically. Even after
seeing the Master and really loving Him, he was still seeking truth
in other directions. He went out to California to follow a
spiritual quack, whose methods of healing killed poor Louis. The
last thing from his gifted hand was [a] beautiful medal with the
Master's profile on it.--J.T.

[115] Baha'is to not believe that `Abdu'l-Baha is a Prophet of God,
although this was a widespread notion at this time. The prophets
of the Baha'i Faith are Baha'u'llah and the Bab.

[116] Mount Morris Baptist Church. See The Promulgation of
Universal Peace, Second Edition, pp. 147-50.

[117] See The Promulgation of Universal Peace, Second Edition, pp.
163-71.

118 After this, Walter Hampton came to the Master every day--he
never missed a day--till our Lord went to Dublin [New
Hampshire].--J.T.

[119] The famous conservationist.

[120] See Mark 10:17-22 and Luke 18:18-23.

[121] See The Promulgation of Universal Peace, Second Edition, pp.
213-16.

[122] We never dreamed how soon He would be with her there.--J.T.

`Abdu'l-Baha journeyed to California, arriving in San Francisco on
1 October 1912. Lua made the arrangements for his visit.--ED.

[123] 1947. There may have been two meanings to that visit to the
Museum and the second meaning I could not have thought of till
1940, when I became so deeply involved in the Baha'i work in Mexico
and completely at one in heart and spirit with the believers
there.--J.T.

[124] 1947. He died of his humiliations which were more than human
flesh could bear. And in the end he would weep and say to a friend,
who told me afterward, "Do you think we did all we could have done
for the Master?" He tried his best to communicate with me, but fate
had made me inaccessible. "I must write to Juliet," he said. "There
is something I must tell her." I have never known what this
was.--J.T.

Dr Grant was eventually publicly disgraced and forced to resign his
position in the Church of the Ascension. He retired to his country
home and died less than three years later.--ED.

[125] 1947. Just after the Master ascended, dear Mrs Goodall died
and Ella sent the rosary back to me. Several years later I gave it
to Romeyn Benjamin. It played a miraculous part in his life and
when he died, eight years ago, again it came back to me.--J.T.

[126] In exactly a month, to the day, He saw me in Green Acre,
where Mamma and I were His guests for four days.--J.T.

[127] See The Promulgation of Universal Peace, Second Edition, pp.
431-37.

[128] The Miss X of this and the Thonon diary.

[129] See announcement of their engagement, Baha'i News (later Star
of the West), I:9 (1910), p. 11.

[130] The extension room on the second floor of 48 West Tenth
Street, now divided into two rooms.--J.T.

[131] See The Promulgation of Universal Peace, Second Edition, pp.
447-48.

[132] See Baha'i World Faith, pp. 204-207.

[133] See The Promulgation of Universal Peace, Second Edition, pp.
449-56, 460-61.

[134] See The Promulgation of Universal Peace, Second Edition, pp.
469-70.